Sexy Summers (Sexy Series) (31 page)

He clears his throat, obviously. "You, uh... you want something in particular?"

I grin as I tear my eyes from that favourite place and look at his face. "Yes. Yes I do. Are you going to give it to me?"

"Maybe," he says cooly.

"Maybe? Oh, I see. Well maybe I'll just take what I want?"

"Oh you will? Hmm, okay. Let's see how that works for you."

"You know I can get what I want from you with very little effort. You love it."

He pauses and grins from ear to ear. "Really? Like the other night in the club? You got something - but did you get what you really wanted?"

"No. But you were being mean."

"Oh right, and what makes you think I won't be mean now, Princess?"

"Because you love me too much. Because you can't help but give me what I want because I have your cute, little baby inside me."

"What?!" he cries, "You can't use that!"

"Why not? Because I'm right?"

He pouts and narrows his eyes, crossing his arms. "Maybe."

"See... I'm going to get what I want."

He raises an eyebrow, challenging me so I slide off the bed and sink to my knees on the floor. I crawl over to him and look up at his face; he is grinning perfectly. I smooth my hands up his thighs slowly until I reach the waistband of his trousers and slowly hook my fingers around it. I smile at him and gently tug them down, slowly, staring into his eyes as I do. It's incredibly difficult not to break this eye contact to gaze at my favourite appendage, but looking at him like this, while I slowly strip his bottom half, is so overwhelmingly erotic. I'm ready for him, but more than anything, I want to taste him.

My eyes locked to his, I take him in my hand and firmly run my fist back and forth, feeling him swell further with each stroke. His mouth opens and he blows out, looking alternately between my eyes and my hand caressing him. Keeping eye contact, I lean forward slowly and reach his tip with my tongue, and I lick it indulgently. He groans out loud and grimaces as he rocks his head back to rest against the wall.

I know he's loving it and it makes me need him all the more. I look at him in my hand and get that tingle down in my lady bits, it's just so perfect. I don't waste a second before I plunge him into my mouth as far as I can take him.

"Oh sweet Jesus, carrots, and peas..." he cries and the laughter rumbles in my throat, but I refuse to remove him from my mouth. "Fuck, baby... so good..."

"Mmm," I moan, sucking, lapping, plunging deep. I love that I can feel him like this, so intimate, so close. Kissing him in the most erotic way, tasting that part of him that I adore, the part that gave me my purpose in life. It gave me Wriggler.

It's an erotic, sexual experience, of course, but I truly love this part of him and the deeper I take him - the harder I suck, the more I feel I am expressing exactly how much I love him. All of him.

He raises his arms and thrusts his hands into his hair as he groans loudly again. I caress his balls with my other hand, gently, moving the precious flesh with my fingers as I move faster with my other hand and mouth around his cock. "Oh god..." he moans, preparing me for what's coming, and I get a buzz of excitement. I love it when I make him come, however I do it, just knowing that I can do that to this big strong man - take him to that place of complete ecstasy - makes me revel in excitement.

"Til... oh shit, holy fuck... Tilly!" he moans loudly as he comes hard, grunting and growling. One hand slips down to rest on my shoulder - not holding me against him or using me for leverage, just gently resting against my skin, affectionately, as his orgasm weakens and finally diminishes.

He stands still, panting for a moment as I slowly lick him lightly and ease him from my mouth.

He grunts quietly through pants and I reach up, running my hands under his t-shirt to rest on his taut abs. I adore this body, I would adore his body even if he wasn't so immaculately built, it belongs to him and that's what I love. But it is a super-fantastic bonus that he's an Adonis and I get to stare at him forever and know that other women want him. He's mine bitches.

I slowly stand against him and wrap my arms around him, resting my cheek on his chest. His arms snake round me and hold me tight. "Fuck, Princess - you're definitely an expert at making me blast off..."

I giggle. "That's because I love it when you 'blast off'."

"I love how you say that,
'blahst'."
he says, chuckling, "Your accent is hot."

"Thanks. So, shall we have a bath now?"

"Yeah. Can we stand here for a minute first? I don't think my legs are gonna work."

I laugh again, "Of course."

We bathe together, our wet bodies sliding against each other, it's just as well I'm so small, he barely fits in the bath himself. It's comforting, warm and wonderful lying here with my big bad-boy, having him hold me and wash my body. We don't say much, he seems a little quiet but that's okay, he's probably still coming down from his forceful climax a few moments ago.

I think that we are finally getting back to the way we were, he's still getting used to it, but he's coming around. We're getting there. I lay back against him, close my eyes and smile. This is us, our family here together, in love. I have got exactly what I never knew wanted and I feel so lucky. I can't wait to tell everyone now.

We finish unwrapping our gifts in bed; Luke opens the 'long distance' pillow cases that I bought him, one with a drawing of a girl skiing, her tracks leading all the way over to the next case, with a boy tumbling down the mountain behind her in a heart shaped ball of snow. When I saw it in the shop I thought it was so sweet, and relevant to us. He seemed to like them a lot.

I open my last two gifts from Luke, the first - a bunch of rabbit themed socks, 'tube socks' as Luke calls them. They make me laugh, they are very cute, and I know they will turn Luke on as soon as I put a pair on. Who'd have thought that socks of all things would be considered 'hot'.

Of course I slip a pair on straight away, teaming them with Luke's t-shirt, before opening my final gift. A beautiful pair of tear-drop, diamond stud earrings. They are amazing, you could see the sparkle a mile off and I absolutely adore them. I am so surprised to have received diamonds from Luke, and I instantly throw myself at him, tightening my arms around his neck.

"Lukey, thank you so much. They're beautiful. Thank you. You didn't have to spend so much on me."

"Til, enough of that. I'm glad you like them."

"Oh, I do, I do! I love them," I say as I kiss his lips.

"Let's sleep," he says, somewhat nonchalantly, taking me by surprise.

"Oh, okay." I respond, confused. "Everything okay?" I start to clear the bed, moving the gifts and wrapping paper to the floor.

"Sure. Careful, Til..." he says loudly, grabbing my hip as I lean over the edge of the bed to drop some more paper.

"I'm perfectly fine, Luke."

"You could hurt yourself, come on."

"Oh god. Seriously, you have to let me live, you can't wrap me in cotton wool, I am only leaning over the edge of the bed, I won't fall off, I won't pull anything, I won't harm either of us."

He rubs his forehead with his fingers again and I can see I'm trying to hold back. He wants to say something.

"What, Luke? Spit it out."

"Nothing," he says, lowering down into the bed, "forget it, let's just get some sleep."

Maybe he's realised he's worrying too much. I don't know, but I think it best to just lie down with him and forget it.

I snuggle into my pillow, watching him get comfortable, and decide to change the subject. "So do you want to take me, bad-boy?" I ask with a wink and he smiles at me, running his fingertips up my arm.

"Not tonight. I'm kinda tired. That okay?"

What? No to sex, again?
"Um, yeah. Is everything okay? Ever since I told you, you don't seem to want to have sex as much."

"No. Everything is fine. I'm just tired after snowboarding today."

That excuse isn't washing with me, but we can broach the subject tomorrow, I don't think I'll get anywhere tonight. Maybe I'll sit down with him and discuss my concerns about his worrying and about the sex thing. It's so unlike him.

"Okay." I turn and face away, wriggling back against him.

He holds me close and kisses behind my ear. "I'm sorry, Princess," he whispers , and I wonder just what it is he is apologising for.

CHAPTER
FIFTEEN

THURSDAY 27TH DECEMBER

I stir very early, it must be about three, and Luke is kissing my shoulder and neck over and over again, his hand firmly holding my tummy as he whispers about how much he loves me. It's too early to wake fully and I feel myself falling back into the deep sleep of a moment ago with a contented smile on my face as he continues to kiss. His sniff is the last thing I hear as my dream takes me down a dark corridor of the school I went to as a child.

I stir again a couple of hours later, his hands leave me and the mattress moves as he climbs out of bed. "Mmm... come straight back..." I mumble, hearing his feet pad around to the en-suite. I fall back asleep again, looking forward to being wrapped up safely in his warm body.

I roll over to reach for him when I wake again, feeling cold and lonely. I open my eyes, realising he's not back, and I turn to check the door to the en-suite - that feels like hours ago, he can't still be in there... and he isn't, the door is wide open. I sit up and look at the balcony, the curtains are closed and still so the door must be closed; he's not out there. He must be downstairs, I think, as I yawn and rest back against the headboard, rubbing my eyes. Maybe he's getting us breakfast in bed. I hope so, how fun!

I turn to my bedside table to check the time on my phone and my heart thuds hard in my chest when I see what's on there. The jigsaw I bought him, split in half, just the Stars and Stripes left; his heart. Immediately, I check his bedside table to see if 'my' heart is over there. It isn't, and neither is his 'Papa Bear', or his phone. I sit bolt upright, beginning to panic.
What the hell is going on? Why has his stuff moved?

I kick the covers back and run over to the drawers, closing my eyes as I grab one of the handles, praying that I am being irrational in thinking he's done a runner. I open it slowly and my heart falls deep into the pit of my stomach; his clothes are gone.
No... no, no, no! He can't have, he wouldn't have!

I walk back to the bed, searching for clues about where he might be and why he would need to take his clothes. I look at the jigsaw again and press the button on my phone next to it, to see if I have any messages. I do; one, from him.
Please, please, please - let this be something totally normal, let me be forgetting about something...

-

LA Luke 27 Dec

I will love you forever, Princess. You have my heart, no one will ever take that from you. I'm sorry. x

-

I drop to my knees on the floor, my chest constricting tightly around my pulverised heart. I drop my phone and clench my hands at my sternum, needing some relief from the pain. I bow down, hovering over my bent legs, wondering what the hell happened. We were okay... we were cuddling and kissing... he says he loves me.
Why has he gone?
Is he coming back? Does he ever want to see Wriggler?
Oh god... Wriggler...

I moan loudly, letting this pain get out anyway it can. Rocking forwards and backwards I cry, loudly. "No, no, no..." I say over and over. He can't do this to me, Luke would never do this to me.

My door bursts open and I don't even bother to look up when I hear Bea calling out to me. I continue to rock, crying loudly, clutching my chest.

"Til? Tilly, darling, what's happened?" she says as she runs to me and sits on the floor, holding me.

I lean into her and sob. I don't bother to talk, I need comfort, I need to cry this pain away, I need... him.

"Darling, it's okay, just tell me what happened..." she says in a soft voice as she rocks with me. My heart feels like it's in my throat, thumping hard, making me nauseous. This can't be happening.

Daniel appears at our sides and rubs my back, too. Where did they come from? How did they know I was upset?

I bury my face in my hands and try to compose myself, maybe Daniel knows something. I take a deep breath and look up at the two of them. "Why... why are you here?"

"We knew something was wrong, Luke sent a text message to Daniel early this morning asking us to get round here quickly to make sure you're okay."

"He did?'" I ask, hopeful. "What did he say? Where is he?"

Daniel moves forward and takes my hands in his. "He didn't say, but I knew he wasn't with you. Til, he said that you need to tell us something and asked me to tell you it's 'okay'. What is it? Are you alright?" He softly rubs my back, comfortingly and I remember again why we all love this man so much. Bea is so lucky. I thought I was. Even last night when we'd had a few 'words' with each other, I still felt so lucky to have Luke, but now I feel like I don't - I've lost him.
Have I really lost him? Has he gone for good? Does he just need a break?

"Daniel, where is he?" I ask in desperation, pleading with him.

"Sweetheart, I just don't know."

"Did you ask? Can you call him? Text him?"

"I have, I've been calling him and texting him ever since I saw his message, all the way over here. It's switched off, I can't get hold of him. I'm sorry."

I nod. "He's left me," I say, quietly. "Has he? Has he left me?" I ask Daniel, hoping that he will miraculously have all of the answers, knowing full well that he will not.

"I don't know, Tilly. I have to speak with him. I don't understand what's happening though. Has his stuff gone?"

I nod. "Yes. I don't know why, we were so happy - he was kissing me and cuddling me in the night... why would he do this? What happened between those sweet kisses earlier and... whenever he left? When did he leave?"

"I don't know. I'm so sorry, Til. I need to fucking speak with him, this is wrong," he says, shaking his head and running a hand around the back of his neck.

"Til, what was it you need to tell us? I am so confused. First we get a text from Luke to get around here - he's gone, you're crying because you had no idea he was going - so what can you tell us? I don't understand."

"Oh..." I moan, fresh tears streaming down my cheeks, "Oh god, Bea, I feel so sick. Why is this happening?"

"I don't know, darling..." she says looking at Daniel and shaking her head, helplessly. "I just don't know what to do or say. Could he have changed his mind about the girlfriend thing? Did you fight or anything?"

"He wouldn't do that, baby, he loves her too much. He wouldn't just take off because of a fight," Daniel answers.

"We have been arguing a little bit, but... I just thought he needed to... he needed to get used to the idea."

"Of having a girlfriend?" she asks, nodding.

I shake my head and put my face in my hands again. "No."

She frowns. "Til, I just don't understand. I'm sorry."

I take a deep breath and slowly get to my feet, sitting on the edge of the bed. They two of them stand in front of me and I take a hand from both of them. "I love you. I need to tell you something."

"Oh god," Bea says, putting her spare hand to her mouth. "Oh god, what? What is it?" she asks panicking and Daniel immediately puts an arm around her back, comforting her.

"Bea, I'm fine, nothing like that."

"You're pregnant." Daniel says, surprisingly, his face knowing, and I see things all clicking into place for him.

"What? No, she's not..." Bea begins and looks at me as she speaks, coming to an abrupt halt when she sees my face. "You're... you're having a baby?"

I nod and look down, hating that they don't already know this. Bea's mouth drops open and she stands in silence, taking it in.

"Oh, sweetheart. This makes a lot more sense to me now," Daniel says as he sits down next to me on the bed and puts his arm around me, holding me tightly against him. I slip my arms around his stomach and let myself soak in the comfort. It feels so good just to have someone hold me.

"Darling... I... who? When?" Bea asks, dropping to her knees in front of me and reaching for one of my hands.

"It's Luke's baby, of course. It happened while we were in LA."

"What?" she cries, "How long have you both known?"

And this is the bit I really don't want to have to go through again. "I told Luke on Christmas Eve. I have know for a long time, and I'm sorry I didn't tell you Bea, I really am, please don't be upset. But I wanted Luke to know first. You know?"

"Oh, Til, of course I do, I'm not upset... I am absolutely gob-smacked though. I mean - this must have been so hard for you?"

I nod, nonchalantly, I did what I had to. "Darling, Clare knows, but not because I told her, she guessed the other day and I asked her not to say anything until I told Luke. And then Luke didn't want to mention anything until he got used to the idea... which... I guess he won't now. But since he told Daniel I could tell you - now you know."

She stands again and bends to hug me hard. "Oh gosh, doll, you poor, poor thing. And that fucking son of a bitch!" she shouts, pulling back and looking at Daniel. "You better bloody well get hold of him and tell him what the fuck I think of him right now," she shouts to Daniel, quickly followed by, "sorry, darling. I didn't mean to shout at you," and a quick peck on the lips.
God, 'in love' is not what I need to witness right now.

"I know, and don't worry. I'll track him down. I know what's going on now."

"Do you? He better fucking know what's coming to him from me," Bea says, firmly.

"No, Bea," I respond, defending him, "it's not his fault. He's not the dad type, I'm surprised he was even the boyfriend type. I suppose I thought this would happen, I just fell too far... in love... with him..." I say slowly through sniffles as I melt again.

"What can I do? Let me get tea," Bea says, warmly.

I nod, wiping the tears from my face. "Okay, thank you. Daniel please can you try and get hold of him, tell him I need to talk to him. Tell him I won't be mad - I just need to tell him that I love him and that it's okay."

"It's not fucking okay!" Bea shouts and Daniel frowns. "Okay, okay. I'm sorry, Til."

I smile, even in a 'situation' these two are so cute.

"I will keep trying, sweetheart," Daniel says as he kisses my cheek and stands to leave the room, I presume to start trying to make contact with him. "Do you know what time he left?"

"No. I know we woke up really early and he was kissing me and... and holding my tummy, "I whisper, the pain ripping through me as I recall, "and then I woke a couple of hours later when he was getting out of the bed to use the toilet. Or so I thought... I don't remember him coming back to bed after that... oh god..." I say as my stomach churns painfully and I rock forwards again.

"Okay, I'll be downstairs if you need me. I'll let you know if I get a hold of him."

I nod and watch as he and Bea leave the room.

I enter the en-suite and lean against the vanity, looking in the mirror at my ugly, morning, cry-baby face.
Ugh.
I run the sink taps and splash myself, washing off the sleep and salty tears, praying it will refresh me just a little bit.

When I return, Oliver is sitting back on my bed looking his usual, cool self, resting against the head board, his ankles crossed, waiting for me. "So, we're going to have another little person in the group, eh? That'll be fun!" he says with a huge smile as he opens his arms to offer me a cuddle. I immediately well up again and throw myself at him, laying on the bed, holding him tightly.

"Alright, darling. Everything will be okay. He's just scared and being a bit of an arse-hole, we all have our moments, men are useless. He'll come around," he says, making me smile.

I nod against him, saying nothing. I'm fed up of talking, I just want to lie here, enjoying one of my best friends; my hand-picked brother.

"And you know, he is a really good bloke. He seemed a bit strange on a couple of occasions, but that's all understandable now, given the circumstances, but he's decent. He will come back, don't you worry."

I nod again, sniffing. "Do you think so?"

"I know so, and even if I happen to be wrong, which - let's face it - I never am, that baby will be so unbelievably loved. You
know
I'm going to be the best uncle ever, and my mum and dad will seriously adopt that child as their grandchild - don't doubt that." I grin and squeeze him tighter, grateful for his love. "I'll help you, Bea and Daniel will and you know Clare will be more than enthusiastic about being a hands-on auntie. But that won't even be necessary, because Luke will be back when he's reorganised his head a little bit, and you'll be back to being the best looking family, ever. Okay? So you stop worrying your little self, stress won't help anyone right now."

I smile, loving his wonderfully caring nature, but it just isn't washing with me. It's very easy to say all of this, but when you're the one who has just been left, pregnant and alone, it's not such an easy pill to swallow.
Bastard!
How can he do this to me? Oh... stop, Til. It's not his fault, he has never seen himself as a dad and he didn't ask for this either. He must have been so overwhelmed to go as far as to leave me.

"Shall we just lie here, darling? Bea is going to bring up some tea and food - you need to eat - and I'm sure Clare will be joining her. You just know they're downstairs doing all that girly shit, worrying about you and getting all excited about buying baby-grows. Now I realise why there was a search on Clare's iPad for 'cot sheets with the highest thread count'."