Seth's Broadway Diary, Volume 1: Part 1 (16 page)

Thirdly, the Studio 54 theatre has very little wing space, and during the opening scene, my friend Jeffrey has to wheel on a bed. He was constantly warned by the tech crew to watch the scrim. The scrim tears easily and is incredibly expensive. Every time we ran the scene, the crew would tell him to be super careful and not be "that guy," as in "that guy" who tore the scrim. Poor Jeffrey, I thought, the pressure on him is
enormous.
Well, during the Sunday matinee, I was leaving the stage and carrying my walker with the bottom facing straight out from me to expedite my exit. I veered slightly to the right and got my walker caught on something. Hmm, I thought, "What's tangled around my walker?" Yes, people. I was "that guy." I tore the scrim, and the devastation you feel when that happens is second only to a dance belt cutting into your bladder.

The best news is that the audiences have been amazing all weekend. It's so fun to hear laughs throughout the show instead of "Hold, please."

This week is also special because my first novel,
Broadway Nights
, just got shipped out from the printers!

Well, I'm off to the gym, everyone. Peace out and enjoy that delicious crisp weather!

Brian, Lea and
Bubbles

September 24, 2007

I just finished the second week of previews for
The Ritz
. It's so fun!
I have a little feature that's at the end of Act Two, so it gives me something to look forward to during the whole show, besides acting out with food. I'm the king of eating a healthy Zone Bar before the show, and then by intermission scavenging in the wig room for Twix Bars.

Off Topic (as they say on the message boards): I got an email that I was so proud of deciphering. Some man asked me about a song I played on Sirius. He said, "It was about a guy who didn't want to get married, but his friends said it was okay, and there was something about a chair." I got a splitting headache 'til I realized he meant "Being Alive" ("
Someone to sit in my chair…
"). Why are those the only references he remembered? How about the words "Being Alive," which are repeated a
thousand
times!!

Speaking of Sirius, I interviewed Brian d'Arcy James, and I busted him on the pretentious three names, but he said he had to add the d'Arcy because there was another Brian James in Equity. Hmm… it's one thing to add a middle name, but a middle name
with
an apostrophe? That's pushing it. Actually, he said he first tried to just use an initial, but since his middle name is spelled d'Arcy, it was Brian d. James and even he knew that only e.e. cummings could get away with that.

We talked about
Harmony
, the musical by Barry Manilow and Bruce Sussman. Brian had the lead, and I was the vocal arranger. You may be shocked to know that I do vocal arrangements, but I think you'll be more shocked to know Brian's character name was Rabbi. I guess Alfred Molina wasn't available. We both thought the show has a
ton
of potential — great story and score. It's about an actual close harmony group called The Comedian Harmonists from 1930s who were German but internationally known at the time. They were disbanded by the Nazis because there were Jewish members in the group, and they faded into obscurity. I first worked on it at the La Jolla Playhouse back in '97, and it finally came here a few years later to get ready for a Broadway production. We rehearsed up a storm and were preparing to leave for our out-of-town tryout in Philadelphia. The
day before
the whole cast was leaving, we were told it was all canceled. The producer didn't really have the money he said he did and, essentially, that was that. The show was totally blocked, ready to go, and, suddenly, everything was off! The cool thing is, the guys who were cast as the Harmonists got to perform with Barry in his concerts across the U.S., and they're on his DVD doing two songs from the show.

At the
Chatterbox
, I had Lea Michele, another name I had to bust. I've never heard a more obvious first and middle name since Ann-Margret. I asked her if her last name was Fleishberger or Schwartzbaum, and she 'fessed up it was tres Jewish. I don't know why people don't keep their real last names. Rudetsky is beautiful. Anybody? Nobody.

Lea said she got into theatre because, when she was eight, her friend was auditioning for Young Cosette in
Les Miz
and needed Lea's parents to take her to the city from Jersey. Since Lea was there, she auditioned, too… and got it. I was mind-boggled that her friend didn't realize this whole scenario was doomed from the start. The same thing happened when Vicki Clark brought Ted Sperling to play for her
Sunday in the Park
audition in the ‘80s, and he was offered a pit pianist job and she was ixnayed. Didn't they know it was right out of the opening scene of
Fame
when Leroy "helps out" his friend auditioning for the Performing Arts High School? Keep those Leroys away from your auditions or pay the consequences: a scene with you cursing while walking down the stairs.

Lea got to play Young Cosette, Young Eponine and understudy Gavroche. I wish I got to do drag as an eight-year-old. Also, what happens when one of the little girls goes on for Gavroche? After the barricade shoot-out scene, does someone discover Gavroche's body and scream, "Sacré bleu! He's a she!" Billy Tipton style? (Does anyone remember him/her? The trumpeter who was married with kids but was really a woman? Too obscure?)

Anyhoo, after
Les Miz
, Lea got
Ragtime
, which began out of town in Toronto. She played the daughter of the immigrant played by the talented Peter Friedman. I asked her how annoying it was to be silent the whole show except for saying "My father speaks for both of us." She said she didn't mind. Then, I confronted her and asked that if her father spoke for both of them, how come she sings up a storm in the opening number. She said that she never thought of that. Maybe her father speaks for both of them, but she belts by herself.

She started working on
Spring Awakening
when she was 14! Before you think the show has been being developed for 20 years, let me remind you it wasn't like when
we
were 14 (when Alf was big) — it was only a couple of years ago. The cool thing is, she's been playing the role ever since the beginning of the formation of the show. The uncool thing is, she's had to audition for each incarnation of the show! Before the Off-Broadway production, she was getting emails from her "friends" saying they were trying out for her role! She called the director (Michael Mayer) and told him that she still looked young enough and that she wanted to come in and audition… and, of course, she got it. I asked her about bearing her breast onstage, and she said that when the show was Off-Broadway, she got a handwritten note in her dressing room from Michael Mayer saying, "I think you should show your breast at the end of the act." Hello? Where's the build up? Where's the: "Tell me if you're comfortable with this"… "I know this may be shocking"… "Not since Janet Jackson," etc… She said she ran into Jonathan Groff backstage before the show, and I asked if he was carrying a photocopy of the same note with the word "breast" scratched out and replaced with "butt."

Last weekend was my boyfriend's daughter's birthday. Juli turned seven, so we took her to
Gazillion Bubble Show
. If you haven't seen it, it's essentially a woman named Ana Yang onstage doing all these amazing things with bubbles and lights. I wouldn't say her character had much of a "journey," but it was totally super cool to watch. She chose some kid audience volunteers to come onstage, and Juli kept being not picked. I could tell Juli was disappointed, but I was thinking that it's important that she learn how to deal with that feeling. Then, Ana asked for an adult couple to come onstage, and when James and I weren't picked, I realized that it's important for
me
to learn how to deal with that feeling. I was in a rage, but it subsided after the show when we all took a picture inside a bubble.

All right, I'm off to do a photo shoot with the cast and Terrence McNally for
Genre
magazine! Peace out!

Ritz, Rent
and Worley

October 1, 2007

What to wear to
The Ritz
opening night party?
I want to get a real ‘70s outfit to keep it apropos, but from where? I guess I could raid my old closet in my mom's house, but all the clothes I wore in the ‘70s won't work now. Not because I was a kid back then and the clothes won't fit my adult body… au contraire, I was sporting a waist similar to the one I have now. The words "pants" and "husky" went hand-in-hand for me back then. I just don't think any of my old clothes were hip enough to make a splash today. Although, I remember one pair of pants I had in fourth grade… on each leg was a lion and underneath, it said, "Your den or mine?" My question is: why was a nine-year-old wearing such a suggestive outfit, Mother?
Pretty Baby
? Teri Shields? Anybody?

I saw
Rent
this week and Adam Pascal and Anthony Rapp were great. Typical me, I spent a chunk of the show obsessing over the fact that Anthony is in full winter gear for most of the show. Did he have a fit during tech rehearsals? "Hello! I'm performing on a stage under 1,000 lights! Why are you making me wear a scarf? And why must it be wool?" Doesn't he long to do the finale in just a bikini? Revival of
Good Vibrations
? Anybody?

Adam Pascal's voice is so amazing as per usual. It always has that signature rasp, but then he'll shockingly go up to a crazy high note with no effort. He played Freddie in the Actors Fund concert of
Chess
I put together, and quite frankly,
my
face was more strained while I was conducting than his was while hitting high Cs.

My only complaint about
Rent
was that there were some moments where the band sounded louder than the singers. It made me recall that classic Carol Channing story. Apparently, after she saw
Rent
, she came backstage and "complimented" the cast by saying (read this with the Carol Channing accent/enormous smile), "I didn't understand a word you said, but the
energy
…!"

On Thursday, I interviewed Jo Anne Worley at the
Chatterbox
. She told me that she grew up on a farm in the Midwest but made extra money working as a waitress at a truck stop. She said she never told anyone she wanted to go into performing. She was engaged at 17 and told everyone she wanted to be a nurse. Cut to — she took her truck stop money, hightailed it to Nyack, NY, to work as an apprentice in summer stock, and told her fiancé she'd be back right after the summer. Essentially, he's still waiting.

She talked about her first professional foray into singing, which was playing the role of Katisha in
The Mikado
. She said she got a great laugh because, while the Mikado was singing, she would take out a tomato, put a ton of salt on it, bite into it and then offer it to the audience. Apparently, it was also her first foray into upstaging. Brava!

She made her Broadway debut in a revue of Billie Barnes novelty songs and Walter Kerr of New York Times went
crazy
for her. He spent two paragraphs describing the mouth contortions she did while parodying an opera singer. Unfortunately, the show lasted a weekend. But then she got to be the standby for Carol Channing when
Hello, Dolly!
was doing its out-of-town tryout (but never went on).

She was very excited when she was in L.A. and got an audition for a TV show, but she didn't have a way to get there because she didn't drive. Her friend also had an audition and said, "Why don't we go together? I'll drive!" It’s a good thing she got a lift because the show was
Laugh-In
! Jo Anne got it and her friend didn't. How many times do I have to warn my readers that the whole "come along with me to my audition" always leads to the
Fame
Leroy opening scene?!

Jo Anne then talked about her foray back onto Broadway in the late ‘80s. She said the producer of
Prince of Central Park
called her and said that they wanted her to replace the leading lady and was she available? Was she?! Yes! Well, not really… she was doing
Mame
in Los Angeles, but this was Broadway calling! They'd have to let her go, right?

N-O.

The producer said she signed a contract and had to finish out the run. Jo Anne said that she was friends with Angela Lansbury and she would ask her to finish out the run instead. The producer said, "I advertised Jo Anne Worley, and that's who will be playing Mame." AH!