Set In Flames (Morningstars Book 1) (10 page)

“She’s the fucking Queen, Kade!”

His brother sat down on the bottom step of the stairs, staring at him in disbelief.

“Truly? You ain’t lying to me?” Jaden shook his head. His heart feeling heavy at all the things this title was implying.

“That is amazing! That means she’ll be protected at all times! You would never have to worry about her. I don’t get why you push her away. Every reason that you had; everything that spoke against you having an Origin is nullified if she is the Queen!”

Kaden’s excitement just made Jaden’s mood darker. Just like him Kaden had no idea what it meant to be mated to the Queen. Kaden was just as clueless.

Somehow though Jaden wasn’t in the mood to educate his brother.

“You do realize that you won’t be the most important person in my life anymore if I’m mated? It’s not just us anymore then,” he smiled, trying his hand at humor to hide the desperation he felt. Kaden was oblivious to his dilemma, grinning wide.

“I might move to the base then. That’s okay, Jay, she is beautiful and I love her like a sister!”

Jaden’s growl made him change his wording.

“She already feels like family to me and…”

“I won’t fall in love with her and she will not move in with me. Kaden, I have my duty to the Order. They always came first and always will come first. No little brunette could ever change that.” The moment the words were out he knew they were a lie. Still, he shook his head as if to emphasize his words.

“Do you feel like going out? I need blood. And…”

“Don’t even think about ending that sentence.”

Kaden had sobered up remarkably in just a few short seconds. Getting up from the stairs he stood in front of Jaden, appearing taller and more serious than Jaden had ever seen him.

“It’s almost daylight outside. And I won’t help you drink away the things you don’t want to believe. You can’t change what will happen even if you try. Besides, I will never help you to stab Maya right in the heart, twist the blade and make her bleed to death, because you sleeping with another woman would do exactly that to her,” he said quietly.

Jaden shook his head, thinking about a million retorts, deciding for the one that would be a lie the least.

“She wouldn’t find out.”

“If I remember correctly she found out the very first night,” Kaden gave back and Jaden closed his eyes.

Cheap booze and even cheaper women…

“She won’t see me in the morning. Or the evening. Or any time at all in the next … until I turn her. At least that is my plan.”

He walked passed his brother, ready to go up the stairs.

“I noticed you haven’t been sleeping at home much in the last days. Don’t think I don’t know where you were. I’m your twin, Jaden. I know you as well as you know yourself. Maybe even better than that. You can’t stay away from her. Make sure she won’t fall for you, because playing with her like that? Yeah, it would give the word cruel a whole new meaning.”

Jaden decided to simply act as if he hadn’t heard those last words, pushing open the door to his room.

Maya’s smell was everywhere and he remembered too late that she had been the last one to sleep in his bed.

The daytime hours surely would be fun, trying to forget the female whose smell was granted to haunt him.

Jaden had left what had to be hours ago. Maya couldn’t say for sure since she actually had sat at the window until the shutters had been closed for the day. She wouldn’t mind some sun, some warmth to remind her that she was human, and not a caged animal.

Turning away from the window, she grabbed a thick sweater, glad that Lara had bothered to actually fill her closet with things that Maya didn’t own, but still loved to wear.

She was tempted to head out barefoot, just to feel the grass beneath her feet, but they were going towards November and even though fall was usually gorgeous around here, it was getting icy outside. Especially at this hour.

She opened her door, stepping out into the hall after pulling sneakers on. She hadn’t expected to see anyone, but jumped when Lex stepped from the shadows.

She instantly smiled. Without really knowing him she felt as if he was one of the only friends she really had.

“I feel honored, little princess,” he smiled, reminding her that he could read thoughts. She tried to put up the walls she once before had so easily put in place, but it just didn’t happen for her this time.

Additionally her sight and hearing all but fully left. It was as if she suddenly stood in an unlit alley during a new moon’s night.

Only faintly Maya could hear Lex call her name.

This could not be happening. She wanted to be outside. She wanted to be away.

“Relax, okay?” Lex asked of her and she took a deep breath.

“I wanted to relax outside, get some air, get some perspective. Why are you patrolling the hallway in front of my door? Were you afraid I’d run away?” she snapped, feeling helpless. All her thoughts were open to him and she never had felt more exposed.

“I can stop doing the reading thing, but it won’t happen if I have the feeling you won’t be honest with me,” Lex explained. She could hear him only faintly, as if her ears were stuffed with cotton. It was enough though to make out his words.

Besides, she needed to have his company so she knew that she hadn’t gone fully deaf.

“Fine, don’t read. I’ll be honest. No need to keep secrets anyways,” she whispered. She didn’t even hear herself and it scared her.

Opening her eyes wide she hoped to get more light in, to see more, but except for a barely there blurry scheme she didn’t see much of the vampire at her side.

“As if my night wasn’t bad enough,” she added and then felt how he took her hand, pulling her into the room and over to the window, sitting down close enough so they were side by side, his body almost fully touching her. It was nice because she could feel him breathing. She could even feel him reacting to her movements, his body stiffening slightly.

“Haven’t been next to too many women in a long time, have you?” she asked and he laughed.

“I’m usually the wingman. I don’t need that meaningless sex they all value so much. I help them get the girl and then I get out. It’s been a while, too, though.”

She liked that. It was a nice change to have a non-player at her side.

“So you do relationships?” she wanted to know and then felt him shrug.

For a long moment he was silent.

“I just don’t know, to be honest. I don’t feel the need to get my hands on a girl. I would love to find one I can spoil, you know? Candles, music… All that stuff. I want my Origin, nothing else. What use is there to invest into a relationship only to know that you’ll end up breaking her heart? If the right one comes along, the one I’ll be burning for, I will leave the other girl with a shattered heart and I won’t even think about it. I just can’t do that.”

“It might be a decade until you find that woman. You want to stay alone all that time?” she asked, gently feeling her way along the windowsill. It was a wide one and her favorite spot in the room. Maya leaned back against it pulling up her knees. She didn’t feel him anymore, but the shadow she saw for now was enough to convince her she hadn’t lost all her senses.

“A decade is nothing for me, honestly. I’ve been alone far longer than that now.” She silently nodded and then decided to ask what was on her mind.

“Why did you call me princess?”

He shrugged. Or at least that was what she thought he was doing.

“It seems fitting, because you just got royally fucked over and you are still standing.”

So he had been witness to her misery.

Her vision decided to come back full force that moment, giving her the best chance to see the pitying expression on his face.

“I like that beanie you wear,” she smiled, reaching for the grey hat covering his dark hair. He was beautiful really, made so even more by his sweet personality. Changing the topic she hoped would ease her heartache.

She tried to remember if she had seen him with his hat before. She couldn’t help but realize that whenever Jaden was in a room, she only ever saw him. It was a damn curse.

“You think that … you think that sometimes fate makes a mistake? Like pairing off an unwilling soldier and a stupid little girl?”

Lex smiled, looking more handsome than she had realized before. She hoped that one day, one day soon, there’d be a girl for him. An Origin.

“I don’t think that Fate ever makes mistakes. There is just a difference between being ready for Fate and simply imagining that you have a choice when, in truth, you never had.”

He reached out, touching her knee.

“Princess, there is a reason why I am here…”

He got up and for once Maya wished she could look into his head. He looked torn and somehow she wasn’t sure this was about Jaden and her. It seemed to be bigger than that.

“I don’t know if anyone ever told you about the Queen of the Origins. She’s going out, finding all that will one day bring new children into this world. The way I get it there’s this little vibration thing going on… Oh man, that somehow sounds totally wrong.”

She had to chuckle and he gave her a smile.

“I think we all went absolutely wrong about this whole thing. No one should have locked you up with half the info, but Colbin thinks that you could freak out if you actually find out what you are supposed to do. I don’t think so. I think you are amazing and you might feel better if you can actually prepare for what will be coming.”

He took a deep breath, pausing for a few minutes while contemplating his words. It was pretty clear that he either debated on what to tell her or how to do it.

“Look, you don’t have to tell me. It obviously isn’t easy. If this is some kind of secret, I’d prefer it if you don’t spill it. I am guessing it’s a warrior thing,” she smiled and he shook his head, kneeling in front of the windowsill.

“I want you to understand what your title means, what it will bring to you. Colbin thinks of the race. I think of you.”

She finally realized what he was aiming at and it made her shake her head.

“If you are trying to say that I am the Queen, then you better stop wasting your breath,” she whispered and he slowly nodded.

“It’s what I am saying. You’ll be the Queen. And you’ll be an amazing one, too. Trust me. You don’t have to be scared. Wherever you go, you have us. We are your warriors. We are protecting you with everything we have. All those unmated Origins you’ll find, they’ll come and live at the court with you. Friends, Maya… You’ll have a lot of friends. Families will be together because of you. Babies will be born. You are the hope of the race! No matter what will be coming. Do you see what that means?”

She took a deep breath, but he obviously wasn’t done yet.

“Without a Queen every Origin will die. Every warrior who finds a mate will have to watch her die. Everyone until now did. Once you are turned, the Origin magic will make sure that your generation survives… And that will create babies… It will bring a new generation in the world. It’s not all though, Princess.”

Not all? Wasn’t it already enough?

Lex chuckled, proving that he simply couldn’t stop looking into her head. It should annoy her, but she wasn’t sure she could actually put all her jumbled thoughts into words.

“You know best how it feels to be abused. Your court will be open for all girls and women who need it. Not all matings are perfect. In fact, a lot of them aren’t. Out there we have kids that come from insane matings. Hellraise children. The first-born are still Morningstar, a lot of them beaten and neglected. Your home will be their home,” he whispered and she pressed her lips together. Of all the things he could have said, that was the only thing that got to her.

“Don’t you have orphanages or something like that?” she asked, hopeful, but he just looked at her, letting her come to her own conclusion.

“Why are you telling me?” she wanted to know and he got up, shrugging.

“Because I think that we all have moments when we doubt whatever we do. There are moments when we need a reminder that life doesn’t stop. I tell you because if a person knows how much one needs to have a helping hand, it is you.”

She closed her eyes, looking at the dark windows. She still wanted to go outside, still needed to feel the sun on her face. Maybe now she needed it even more than she had before.