Serenity Falls (30 page)

“Kenleigh,
it’s fin—” Brantley and Sarah say at the same time, but I cut them off.

“IT’S
NOT FINE! WHERE THE HELL IS HE?” I shout at everyone and anyone who is trying
to make me see reason to the situation at hand.

“I’m
right here.”

That
voice,
his
voice, makes my heart stop. Relief floods through me like a
drought stricken area finally receiving that one good rainstorm it’s been
seeking. My hair whips me in the face as I spin around and see Wes standing
there behind me. Dirt covers his chaps. Pieces of his shirt have become
untucked from his pants. I have no clue where his cowboy hat is, but I don’t
give a damn because he’s here, safe. Sweat trickles down the sides of his face
as I search for any cuts, scrapes, or bruises. Feeling satisfied that he
doesn’t seem to be injured, I launch myself into his arms. Tears well up as I
start to cry. I hold myself to him as if he might disappear. I try to listen
the beat of his heart, but I can’t hear it through the damn vest that’s still
secure over his chest. It’s as if I’m on autopilot. First, rip off the damn vest.
Second, hear the heartbeat that calms me like nothing else. Third, make sure he
has no injuries that I can’t see, and then yell at him for scaring the hell out
of me. Last but not least, I need to kiss him, and tell him how much I love
him, and how proud of him I am. And in that order, I do exactly that.

I
lean back, and with a scornful tone, I slap his arm. “You scared the shit out
of me! I thought you were hurt. Then I couldn’t see you. I couldn’t find you
anywhere.”

With
an arm around my waist, he brings up his other hand to the nape of my neck and
presses my head into the crook of his shoulder. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize
that you’d be that worried about me. I mean, I knew you were before, but not to
this extent.”

I
squeeze my arms tighter around his neck, just basking in the feel of his warm
body pressed against mine. “But I’m very proud of you. You lasted the whole
eight seconds. Well, at least I think you did. I’m so sorry that I freaked
out,” I whisper. I pull, and my blue eyes find his.

“It’s
okay.” A grin pulls at the corners of his lips. “Did you just say you’re proud
of me?”

I
nod in reassurance. “I did. And I love you. So much. You did amazing out there,
but if you could try and do one little thing for me?” I make a barely there
space between my thumb and forefinger. “Could please not get too close to the
bull’s head again, or let those damn horns get anywhere near you?”

The
vibration of his silent chuckle causes my eyebrows to rise. “You know I have no
control over that, right?” His lips curl in, and I know he’s trying to control
his laughter.

My
lips begin to form a smile. “Just humor me. Please?”

“Okay,
I’ll try
for you.” He sighs through a smile.

“Good.”
I peck his lips, not once, but twice, and then wiggle free from his hold. Wes
links his fingers through mine as I turn to see everyone else looking at us.

“That
was fucking awesome! You did great out there,” Brantley says, slapping Wes on
his shoulder.

“I
don’t know how the hell you got off that bull without getting kicked in the
head. Man, I haven’t seen you ride like that in ages,” Liam says, shaking Wes’
empty hand.

Sarah
leans up on her tiptoes and kisses Wes’ cheek as she says, “I’m just glad
you’re safe. Kenleigh here had me freaking out a little myself.”

As
we all sit down on the bleachers, Jackie is the last one to say something. “I
knew you could do it. You’ve gotten better since the last time I saw you ride.”

I
bite the inside of my cheek, trying to contain the retort on the tip of my
tongue. After the talk we had at the bonfire, I was sure she would have given
up her quest for Wes. I still want to believe it. The rational part of me knows
that it’s ridiculous, childish even, to be jealous that she’s seen a side of
him that I haven’t. With a couple of deep breaths, I let it go.

“Are
we partying tonight?” Brantley asks. “You know, in celebration for that great
ride.”

My
eyes close as I hope Wes says no. It’s not that I don’t want him to spend time
with our friends and celebrate. He really did do great out there. He did
something I never would have had the guts to do. But I want it to just be us
tonight. Last night, I told Wes that I needed to start packing to get ready to
return to the dorms. We discussed it somewhat, but then, he once again evaded
the conversation as much as he could. Finally, I told him that on Sunday, which
is now tomorrow, I needed to pack. “Naw… can’t, man. I’m gonna spend some time
with my girl.” Wes lets go of my hand only to drape his arm over my shoulders.
I lean into his comforting embrace. As the guys give him shit for choosing me
over them, a twinge of dread sinks to the bottom of my stomach because all too
soon, my time with Wes will be up. One more day… That’s all we have left, and I
have no clue where we will go from there.

The
past couple of days, I’ve been a nervous wreck, and have spent every second
that I can with Wes. On Friday, at the end of camp bonfire/birthday party, we
barely left each other’s side. Yesterday, we lounged around the house until it
was time to go to the rodeo. When we returned home, he snuck into my room, and
we talked about anything and everything. When we weren’t talking, we were
making love. I didn’t want Mrs. Sandy or Mr. Will to wake up and find Wes in my
room, but it was worth the risk because I realized that this would be the last
time I’d be sleeping in his arms for a while, if ever again.

Now,
reality is slapping me in the face like the bitch that she really is. I’ve been
packing all day, preparing to return to school tomorrow. My stomach’s filled
with dread and twisted in knots. Anxiety streams through my veins, knowing that
Wes and I are still where we were a few weeks ago when I first tried to talk to
him about what will happen when I return to school. But every time I bring it
up, he finds a way to evade the seriousness of the situation. I’m not ready to
leave, not by a long shot. When I left my dorm, I thought I was happy with the
way my life was going. Then I arrived at the ranch, and met the man that turned
my world upside down in the best possible way ever. I heave a deep sigh because
I know that when I go back to campus, my life will no longer be the same. Just
the thought alone makes me feel empty inside.

I
last saw Wes this morning when he woke me by peppering small kisses all over my
face, neck, collarbone, and the swells of my breasts. My body quivers with
anticipation at the thought of how he touched every, last inch of my sensitized
flesh and the huskiness of his voice as he whispered sweet nothings in my ear.
Tears slowly obscure my vision when I think about how much I’ll miss him. I
tried so hard to protect myself so I wouldn’t get hurt, but he worked his way
in. And honestly, I couldn’t have stopped him even if I wanted to. The heart
wants what it wants, and mine wants Wes. Inhaling a deep breath, I will myself
not to burst into tears. When a knock sounds on my door, I quickly blink back
the tears, and clear my throat. “Come in.”

The
door cracks open. “Hey hon—” Mrs. Sandy stops, her eyes widening with concern
when she sees me. “What’s wrong?” she asks, walking in and shutting the door
behind her.

“I
don’t wanna leave, Mrs. Sandy. I don’t want to leave Wes.” The dam bursts, and
my tears break free. I can’t hold them back any longer.

“Shh…
It’ll be okay,” she says softly in my ear as she envelopes me in a hug. With a
tender touch, she strokes her hand up and down my back, attempting to soothe my
sobs. “Have you two talked?”

I
shake my head. “No. When I try to bring it up, he changes the subject. I don’t
know what else to do.”

“Well,
if I know my son at all, I know this. Your leaving is just as hard on him as it
is for you.”

I
take a shuddering breath. “Why won’t he just talk to me about it? I know
there’s a way we can work it out.”

Mrs.
Sandy removes her arms from around me only to cup my face in her hands. She
lifts my tear stained face, and her sapphire blue eyes bore into mine. “All I
can tell you is to try talking to him again. Okay?”

I
nod while wiping my face clean of tears. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Good.”
Smiling, she tilts my head down and kisses my forehead. “I’m gonna go, but if
you need anything, I’m here for you.” She steps around me and pulls the door
open.

I
look at her over my shoulder. “Mrs. Sandy?”

“Hmm?”

“Thank
you.”

“Anytime,
dear. That’s what mothers are here for.” She walks out the door, leaving it
ajar. Her words settle over me like a blanket, giving me warmth.
Mother.
In a sense, she’s right. She is Wes’ mother, and in some sort of way, she’s
like one to me, too.

I
turn back to the mess on my bed, heave a deep sigh, and continue to pack.

“Hey.”
I hear Wes speak as I throw the last bit of clothes in my bag.

My
head turns to see him standing in the doorway. “Hey.”

He
must be able to tell from my solemn mood that something is off. “What’s wrong?”
He steps inside my room, and his eyes flicker between my packed bags and me.

I
sigh and plop down on the bed. “We really need to talk.”

He
crouches down in front of me, taking my hands in his. As his thumbs caress the
backs of my knuckles, he says softly, “And we will. But I really wanna show you
something. Will you walk with me?”

Defeated.
That’s what I feel right now, because he has just brushed the seriousness of
our situation off again. I nod and stand from the bed. My head lifts when I feel
Wes’ fingertips touch my chin. Leaning down, his lips barely brush over mine.
“I love you. Everything will be fine.
We
will be fine.”

After
hearing those words, all I can do is hope he’s right, and have faith in us. “I
love you, too.”

Hand
in hand, we walk out of my room, down the stairs, out through the screen door,
and head toward the barn. The soft, yellow lights from lightning bugs flicker
against the orange, purple, and red hues of the setting sun. The sweet scent of
honeysuckle blankets the air around us as Wes stops outside the closed barn
doors. “Close your eyes.” He steps behind me and places his hands on my hips.

“You
and your surprises,” I whisper, closing my eyes.

“I
thought you liked my surprises,” he murmurs against my ear as he nips the lobe.

“Mmmhmm…”
I shiver as tingles race down my spine.

He
chuckles behind me. “All right. I’m going to open the doors and help you walk
through. Don’t open your eyes ‘til I tell you to. Okay?”

“Okay.”
Excitement makes my hands clammy. Anxiety causes my knees to wobble and sweat
bead on the back of my neck. Wes likes to surprise me, but he’s never gone so
far as to make me close my eyes. The creak of the wood as the door opens makes
my heart beat in a faster rhythm. Slight pressure against my hips where Wes
gently squeezes propels me to move forward. With cautious steps, I notice the
normal crunch of pebbles and hay beneath my feet is no longer there. Instead,
no sound resonates within the barn at all.

“You’re
doing great. Just a couple more steps,” he encourages. “Okay, right here,” he
whispers against my ear as he wraps his arms around my waist.

“Can
I open my eyes now?” I ask excitedly.

He
shakes his head in the crook of my neck, and I laugh. “Okayyyy.”

“My
whole life, I’ve waited for someone like you. There’s something about you that
makes a part of me come alive. I know that you wanted to discuss what will
happen to us when the summer ends–”

“I
have,” I interrupt.

“And
I’ve evaded the topic all together. The truth is, Kenleigh, I don’t want the
summer to end. I don’t what we have to end,” he whispers, kissing the shell of
my ear. “Go ahead and open your eyes.”

My
eyes spring open, and I’m left breathless at the sight that greets me. I turn
my head in all directions, taking in the magnificent scene laid before me. Red
and white rose petals lay delicately scattered along the breezeway floor.
Candles ensconced in lanterns decorate the entire barn. Windows in each of the
horse stalls are open. The sweet, light, airy smell of honeysuckle mixes with
the scent of the rose petals. The soft glow from the candlelight bounces off
the walls of the barn, creating the most romantic ambiance I’ve ever
experienced. Wes has really outdone himself. His warm, gentle, tender, yet
strong hands surround mine as he wraps his arms around me from behind. I lean
my head back against his shoulder, and my gaze meets his. “What do you think?”

I
clear my throat because I’m still at a loss for words. After a few seconds, I
let him know what all this really means to me. What he really means to me.
“This is amazing.
You
are amazing. I can’t believe you did all of this,”
I answer breathlessly.

“You
should know that I have never gone to extremes like this to catch a girl’s
attention.”

“I
can assure you that you caught my attention way before this.” I chuckle at his
statement.

“I
hope so,” he answers, his voice ringing with sincerity. “I wanted tonight to be
special. I meant what I said, Kenleigh. I don’t want what we have to end. I
love you, and those are words that I don’t throw around lightly. You’ve given
me so much more than you think.”

“Like
what?”

“The
truth is… For the first time in a long time, I feel like I can finally breathe.
You’re a breath of fresh air for me. We have fun together. It’s effortless and
carefree.
We’re
effortless and carefree.” Stepping around me, his
strong, warm hands cup my cheeks.
“Kenleigh, I love you. When I came
here this summer, I had no idea that not only would I fall in love, but that
I’d find my best friend, too. You accept me, faults and all. I’ve told you
about my past, and yet you still chose me. You chose to let me into your heart
and make it my own. I have never had anyone put as much faith in me as you
have.”

Speechless.
That’s what his words have rendered me. No coherent thought comes to mind as he
drops his hands from my face and envelops mine in his own. “Our love is what
fairy tales are made of. Romance novels that have their happily ever after,
that’s the kind of love we share. It’s something that most people dream of
finding. We’re lucky we did. I once thought I had it all… I thought I was
happy. Now, I realize I lived in the dark and not in the light. I was a shell
of a man. I didn’t know what real happiness was until I heard your laugh. I
didn’t know what true light was until I saw you smile. I didn’t know how to
breathe until you told me you loved me, too.” He drops down on one knee, and I
watch wide-eyed as Wes pulls a black velvet box out of his jeans pocket. My
breath catches when he flips the top open. A large, princess cut diamond sits
atop a platinum band encrusted in small tiny diamonds along the sides. “I don’t
want this to be some summer love. I don’t want us to leave here and always
wonder what might have been, what could have been. I know with everything in my
soul, Kenleigh, that I will only ever love you. Please make me even happier
than you already do, and marry me.”

Tears
flow freely now. The happiness written all over his face, crushes my soul when
I realize that I’m about to shatter his heart. The velvety texture of the rose
petals sticks to my knees as I kneel down in front of him. “Wes, I love you
more than you will ever know. Like you, I didn’t plan on meeting my soul mate
when I came here this summer. I didn’t even believe in soul mates until I met
you. There’s been this hole in my heart for so long, but now it’s filled,
thanks to you. You did that. You gave me peace,” I whisper. When he goes to
speak, I shake my head to stop him and take a deep breath. “But… I don’t need a
proposal. We can make it work. Somehow, someway.”

I
watch as a myriad of emotions flicker in his eyes. Love and joy turn into hurt
and confusion. But the one I dread seeing the most, the one I know will become
permanent—hate. “What are you trying to say, Kenleigh?”

“Never
in all my life did I think I would be lucky enough to find someone as wonderful
as you. The past couple of months mean more to me than you will ever know.” I
sniff back the tears, because I know I am breaking his heart, the same heart he
gave freely to me. “I don’t this want this summer to end, but more importantly,
I don’t want
us
to end.”

I
turn my head away from him. My hair sticks to the rogue tears that continue
like a torrential downpour on my face. “But?” he grits out through clenched
teeth. His grip tightens around my hand, encouraging me to go on.

“I
can’t marry you. I love you, yes, but I’m too,
we’re
too—”

“You
can’t, or you won’t marry me?” he asks, cutting me off in a hard tone.

My
face falls. I cannot bare to see how much he will hate me after this. “I can’t.
Not right now,” I whisper on a shuddering breath.

“Well
then…” He trails off, dropping my hand on my lap. I lean back on my heels and
slowly lift my head as I watch him stand. With a hand on his hip, he runs the
other through his blond hair, hair that I love to run my fingers through, hair
my fingers will never feel again. “Isn’t this just fucking perfect? I confess
my love to you. I give you my heart, not just half, but the whole damn thing.
For what? To propose to you and be fucking rejected?” he asks. His gaze drops
to mine as he laces his fingers behind his neck. “Is this what you wanted?” A
single tear escapes his eye as his gaze holds me captive. “To hurt me?”