SEPARATED: CONCLUSION TO UN-RELATED (5 page)

When his plane was out of site,
Tyler sat down next to me. “Are you okay?” he asked.

I took a few deep breaths and said, “No, not really. But, I guess I don’t have a choice, do I?”

“He’ll be back. He always comes back for you.”

I reached up and started to hug him, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t ask you to comfort me.”

He pulled me to him and said, “We’ll always be friends, Abby. You can always count on me.”

I let him hold me and I cried for a long time. I didn’t know how long, but I noticed another plane had boarded and left from the same gate while I was sitting there crying over Kellan.

I finally pulled myself together and said, “Thank you, Tyler. I’m sorry you always have to see me like this.”

“You’re always beautiful to look at, even when you’re crying. Come
on; let’s go get something to eat.”

“I’m not hu…hungry,” I sniffled.

“Kellan told me to make sure you ate and since he’s always scared the hell out of me, I’m going to do what he asked.”

I gave him a small smile and nodded. We walked out to his car, and always the gentlemen, he opened the door for me and closed it behind me once I was safely inside.

“So, how about seafood on the pier?”

This started a whole new torrential downpour of tears.

“What did I say? You love seafood…I thought.”

“I do, I’m sorry. It’s just…”

“Let me guess, Kellan took you for seafood…recently?”             

“On my birthday,” I sobbed.

“Okay, no seafood. What would you like?”

“Seafood’s fine,
Tyler. I’m fine, I’m sorry. I thought it would be easier this time, but it’s so much harder.”

“So, I’m assuming he got past the foster sister thing?” he asked.

“Yeah, but it took a while…until last night,” I blushed.

“Oh, okay. Wow, he waited that long? I have to give him credit for some serious will-power.”

“He’s stubborn. But, I wore him down…I guess.”

“You guess?”

“I had pretty much given up on…
that
, for the summer. But, then…Oh, I guess I shouldn’t talk to you about this.”

“It’s okay, Abby. I’m kind of…in love, too.”

I turned to him and smiled, “Really?”

“Yeah, she’s great. She’s still not you, but she’s…wonderful.”

“I’m so happy for you. Is it Stephanie?” I asked.

“Yeah.” He grinned shyly, but I could see the adoration in his eyes when he spoke of her.

“She’s beautiful. She seemed really nice that night we met. Um, but, were you in as much trouble with Stephanie as I was with Kellan?” I asked.

“She um, she didn’t speak to me for a week.”

“Oh, no. I’m sorry. You’re not going to get into trouble for tonight, are you? You can just take me home…its okay.”

“I told her, she understands. She knows we’re always going to be friends, Abby. She’s accepted it, and I think Kellan has too.”

“I’m surprised he called you.”

“He called me a couple days ago, but he called again today to make sure I’d be there. He sounded worried about you.”

“Yeah, I’m sure he is.”

“Can I ask why?”

“Um, yeah,” I took a deep breath and said, “Joe and Nancy came home early…unexpectedly…this morning.”

“So?”

“They still think I’m dating you…and boy, were you in trouble for a few seconds!” I had to smile through my pain. 

“What did I do?”

“Nothing…but, they thought it was you…in my bed, this morning.”

He turned to face me and almost ran into oncoming traffic. He quickly corrected the car and said, “Wow. I almost got blamed again for not doing the same thing I didn’t do last time,” he laughed.

“Not that you didn’t want to,” I teased.

“Not that I still wouldn’t do, if I could,” he smiled softly and squeezed my hand.

“Tyler…”

“I know, I know. You love Kellan, and actually, I’m very happy with Stephanie. I um, I love her.”

“Is she going to school with you?”

“Yeah, she is. She has family in
Washington, too. It’ll be great.”

“I’m happy for you, Tyler.”

“Thanks, and I’m happy for you. I guess we both got what we wanted…well, almost,” he grinned at me.

“When do you leave?”

“In three days. We’re all ready.”

“Hmm, that makes sense now.”

“What?”

“Why Kellan would ask you to come today. He knows I need to say goodbye to you, too.”  The tears started again.

“Abby, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…”

“I know. I’m happy for you, really. I want you to go and be happy. I’m just feeling a little lost right now.” I dried my eyes for the twelfth time and turned to face him. “I really am happy for you. You deserve a nice girl. She seems really great.”

He grinned, “She is.” 

We shared a nice dinner, talking about old times and even though I was desperately missing Kellan I found that I had a good time with Tyler.

He finally took me home around 11:30 and he walked me to the door.

“Goodnight, Abby,” he said and reached over and hugged me. I hugged him back, probably a little longer and harder than I should have, but I needed comfort before I faced the firing squad that I knew was meeting me on the other side of the door.

“I’ll keep in touch, and I’ll text you my new number and address, okay?”

“Thank you. Tyler, be happy, okay?”

“I will,” he touched my cheek softly and said, “And so will you. You won’t be seventeen forever.”

“No, it’ll just feel like it,” I grinned and waved at him as he walked back to his car.

“So are you sleeping with him, too?” Joe asked.             

“Joe, she’s home, let’s go to bed.”
Nancy barked.

“What is up with you? Are you seriously going to just let her get away with this? I mean, for God’s sake, she slept with Kellan…her brother…in our house!”

“He’s not my brother! I love him, and I always have. Frankly, I guess I should thank you both, because if it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have him. Goodnight.”

Nancy
followed me down the hall and as I reached my room she said, “Are you missing something?” she asked, holding up my package of birth control pills.

“Where did you get those?” I asked, reaching for them.

She pulled them back from me and said, “I found them in your drawer. Since your brother is gone now, you won’t need them, will you?”

“I’ll just get more,
Nancy. Go ahead, take them. You’re right, I don’t need them right now, anyway,” I said, and slammed the door shut.

I tried my best not to cry, but the tears flowed freely once I stepped into my room and saw my bed. I laid down on it, praying for a trace of his scent, hoping I could just fall asleep and wake up on my 18
th
birthday, so that this torture would be over. It wasn’t too long before I learned exactly what torture was…

The next two weeks dragged by slowly. I was a senior and I should be having the time of my life, but instead I dragged through every day, praying for Thanksgiving so Kellan would come home.
             

I was asked out by numerous guys at school now that
Tyler was gone. After about the 14
th
one, I calmly and politely said, “Thank you, but I have a boyfriend.”

“I never see you with anyone?”
Devon said, obviously assuming I was just trying to turn him down politely.

“He goes to Yale.”

“Hmm, a college guy. I guess you’ll be following him next year, then?”

“He’s in law school, so yes, I’ll be moving to
Connecticut this summer.”

“Oh, an older guy. Well, I hope he knows how lucky he is,” he smiled and walked away.

“I’m the lucky one,” I smiled to myself, looking forward to our phone call tonight. We had agreed to only call each other once during the week, on Wednesday’s and twice on the weekend. So far, that hadn’t happened. Neither of us had been able to go more than one day, and I loved it.

“Only 73 days left,” I said, a countdown I loved to say each night when he called. Each night brought me one day closer to seeing him.

“I’ve been meaning to talk to you about that,” he sighed and continued, “I don’t think I can come for Thanksgiving, Abby.”

“What?” I asked, panicking.

“I have to take a pre-bar exam and they screwed up the dates. I can’t miss this test…I’m so sorry.”

I swallowed hard, but quietly said, “It’s okay, I understand.”

“Do you? Because I’m mad as hell! I tried to trade the date with everyone, and no one will do it. The test is on Saturday and I have to study for it all day Friday. I’m so sorry.”

“Its okay, Kellan. So, when can you come home?”

“Christmas break…but then I can stay for three weeks, okay?”

“Three weeks?”

“Yeah, since I’m taking the exam over Thanksgiving, I get an extra break for Christmas.”

“Well, I guess I’d rather have you for three weeks for Christmas than only two days for Thanksgiving. I wonder how many days...?”

“One hundred and one,” he answered, knowing I needed a new countdown to get through the days.

“What?”

“
Its one hundred and one days until Christmas break. Think of it this way, it’s five weeks closer to your graduation…and to your 18
th
birthday…something I have huge plans for.”

“No fancy hotels,” I giggled, even though I was dying inside.

“No, it’s much better than that. I promise.”

“Hmm, I’m really glad you kept your last promise, even if it was on the very last day of summer!”

“Well, I’m nothing, if not a man of my word. I love you, Abby. I’ll talk to you this weekend…oh, who am I kidding? I’ll call you tomorrow. Sleep well.”

“You, too. Goodnight.” 

I hung up the phone and climbed under the blankets in my bed. I spent a lot of time sleeping just so the time would pass. Tyler told me I was wishing my life away, but I told him I was only wishing my 17
th
year away. After that, my life would be wonderful.

I woke up about two am and realized I wasn’t feeling very well. My stomach was in knots and I knew it was because I had just added 28 days to my already very long countdown. I walked into the kitchen to grab a snack to settle my stomach and ran into Joe.

“What are you doing up?” he snapped.
             

“I just want a snack and then I’ll be out of your hair.”

“Good. Get the hell out!” he slurred. I saw a bottle of alcohol on the counter and assumed he had downed most of it.

I had never seen him drink like that before. Gamble, yes, and it wasn’t unusual for Nancy to drink, but Joe only drank socially. I was actually a little concerned about him.

“Are you okay?” I asked, meekly.

“What the hell do you care? You have what you want…actually it seems you have what everyone wants… what
Nancy wants….Kellan.”

“What?”

“You heard me…you have Kellan. How could you sleep with him? You were a good girl…you were. I heard you tell Tyler you weren’t ready…but then you slept with…
him
!”

“I love Kellan. It’s not wrong to be with someone you love.”

“It is when he’s your brother…or son!” he slurred, making no sense to me whatsoever.

“What are you talking about? Kellan is not my brother…you know that!”

He stood up and said, “I guess if you’re willing to sleep with your brother…”

“He’s not my brother!”

“Foster brother…same difference! So, if you’re willing to sleep with your foster brother…how about your foster dad?”

“You’re talking crazy. Goodnight, Joe!” I said and went straight to bed. He was not himself and I was actually fearful around him for the first time.

I ran to my room and closed my door. I put on the flannel pajamas Kellan had given me and got into bed. The snack was long forgotten. I laid there in the dark and waited, but he never bothered me. I was relieved when the sun finally came up and I was able to go to school.

They left for the weekend, right after work on Thursday and I was happy that I didn’t have to deal or see either of them for three whole days. Things had been strange since they found out about me and Kellan, but Kellan had been right, they didn’t bother me, with the exception of Joe’s one-time drunken advances.

Kellan and I talked most of the weekend, we were constantly on the phone and on Saturday night, he said he had to study for an exam on Tuesday and he wasn’t going to call until Tuesday night, but to call if I needed him. We agreed and we finally hung up an hour later. 

I wandered through the house and then turned on the television. When I couldn’t find anything to watch, I decided to just go to bed. I was tired, anyway. My cycle was all screwed up since
Nancy took my pills from me and I realized I had to wait for my period to start again before I could start my new pack. I hid the new pills I picked up earlier that day with my cash under my rug in the closet. When I was satisfied they were safe, I climbed into bed. 

I fell asleep fast and I had no idea he was even in my room until he had his hand over my mouth. I woke up screaming, but no sound was heard since he held my mouth closed.

“If she can have him…then I can have you!” Joe slurred, obviously drunk again and making no sense.

“If you scream, I’ll call the cops on Kellan…I don’t care if
Nancy goes to jail…it’ll be worth it!”

He took his hand off my mouth and I said, “Wh…what are you doing?”

“I told you, if you’re willing to sleep with your foster brother, then you must be okay with sleeping with your foster father. Come on Abby, it’s just one night!”

“NO! Get out!”

He covered my mouth again and held me down with his body weight and his free hand. He was strong and no matter what I did, even in his drunken state, I couldn’t get him off of me. I struggled and cried, but he didn’t care. He was determined, and no amount of begging, crying or pleading was going to stop him. He finally managed to rip off my underwear. I tried to keep my legs closed tight, but he forced them apart with his knees and I cried out in pain and terror as he finally got his way…