Semper Fi (24 page)

They were both fully hard before long, and Jim reached between then and grasped Cal’s cock. “I want this. Nothing between us ever again.”

“You sure?” Cal licked his lips.

Part of him wasn’t sure at all. He stroked Cal’s throbbing dick with his hand, feeling all around it. Would he like it inside him? Would it hurt? Jim was sure it would, and the anticipation was edged with anxiety. But the greater anxiety came from the thought that he might miss his opportunity. He nodded.

“We don’t have to. There’s no rush.” Cal brushed Jim’s hair back from his forehead.

Jim ran his fingers up and down Cal’s shaft. “I’ve waited long enough. I want to know how it feels. I want to know how you felt last night. I want everything. I want you to…” He trailed off, knowing Cal would get the idea. He let go of Cal’s cock and pulled him closer.

Cal’s lips curved up. “What? What do you want me to do?” He squeezed his hand down below Jim’s balls, teasing the sensitive skin and nearing Jim’s hole.

“You
know
.”

“Sorry. I’m really not sure what you’re after.”

Jim groaned. The devil was really going to make him say it. “I want you to…do that.”

“Ohh,
that.
” Cal put on a contemplative expression. “Although I’m still not crystal clear.” He circled Jim’s opening with his fingertip. “I want to hear you say it.”

“Cal! For goodness sake.” Jim pushed back against Cal’s finger. “
Please
.”

“Hmm. I think I have a notion of what you’re asking for.” Cal ducked his head, his lips at Jim’s ear as he teased his hole. “Do you want me to fuck your tight little ass with my thick, hard cock?”

The dirty words sent a bolt of desire gasping through Jim. He nodded vigorously. His throat was dry, and he took a breath, gritting the words out. “
Fuck me
.”

Cal lifted his head, grinning. “Why didn’t you just say so?”

Jim’s response was swallowed by Cal’s playful kiss, and they both laughed as Cal reached for the jar on the side table. But as he knelt between Jim’s thighs and pushed a slick finger inside, their smiles faded, and they kissed with purpose.

“Breathe,” Cal murmured as he edged in a second finger.

It burned, and Jim didn’t think he’d ever felt quite so vulnerable as he did with his legs splayed, ass lifted, Cal easing him open with his fingers. He concentrated on breathing in and out, his eyes locked on Cal’s.

Cal leaned over to rub their noses together. “Trust me.”

“I do.”

Cal kissed him tenderly. “I won’t hurt you.” He slicked himself and lifted up one of Jim’s legs, hooking it over his shoulder. The head of Cal’s cock nudged Jim’s hole. “Try to relax.”

Jim nodded. The burning sensation returned as Cal began to push in. Cal had seemed to get such pleasure when Jim had been inside him, but at the moment Jim couldn’t imagine how. The stretch was undeniably painful, and when he glanced down he was shocked to see Cal was barely inside.

“Look at me.”

Jim’s gaze flicked back up to Cal’s face. Cal leaned down to kiss him, and as he did, he pushed farther in. Jim gasped at the burn, but as Cal coaxed him open, pleasure returned in flickers. Cal steadily inched in, kissing him softly. The slow progression continued until amazingly, Jim could feel Cal’s wiry hair against his ass. Jim’s erection had flagged, and Cal took him in hand, stroking lightly.

Jim had never felt so
much
. He struggled to breathe.

“Okay?” Cal pressed little kisses to Jim’s forehead and cheeks.

“I am. I’m okay.” Cal throbbed inside him, and Jim experimented with squeezing his inner muscles, making Cal moan. Jim could feel the strain in Cal’s body—the struggle to go slowly and stay in control.

“Need to move,” Cal gritted out. “You’re so tight. God, Jim.”

As Cal began to rock into him, pulling out a few inches and thrusting back in, the pleasure increased. Jim found the rhythm, moving with Cal, relaxing and taking his cock deeper inside him. The need was primal, and his whole body blazed with it, sweat dripping down his forehead.

He’d felt the same way the night before as Cal rode him, and now as Cal filled him
—completed
him—Jim cried out. He bent his leg around Cal’s waist and dug his heel into Cal’s back. His other leg was still hooked over Cal’s shoulder, and Jim felt like he was being turned inside out.

“Yes, yes,” he muttered.

“Like my cock stretching you?”

Gnawing his lip, Jim nodded.

“You like being fucked? You want me to come inside you?” Cal asked as he thrust in and out.

“Yes,” Jim gasped. He felt utterly wanton as Cal opened him, and he never wanted it to stop. “I want it all. All of you.”

They both moaned, panting as they approached the edge. Cal jerked Jim’s cock roughly, kissing him messily and muttering and moaning as they rocked together. Then Cal hit a glorious spot that somehow made the world spin, and Jim’s pleasure overtook him. He called out as pure bliss sang in his veins, washing over him in waves.

Cal thrust several more times before letting go, painting his seed deep inside Jim. Marking him forever. This was the kind of love Jim hadn’t thought existed, and oh yes, he loved Cal. He may go to hell for it, but Jim knew the truth. Accepted it.

With a final groan, Cal collapsed, and Jim let his legs flop down to the mattress. He wrapped his arms around Cal. Jim was flushed from head to toes—warm and
safe.
They kissed slowly.

The sun was up and there was work to be done, but Jim pulled the covers over them and held Cal close, alone in their own private world for just a little while longer.

As he turned the pickup onto the wet county road, Jim felt the press of Cal’s hand on his thigh. He raised an eyebrow. “Should I pull over?”

Cal barked out a laugh. “Well, I wouldn’t say no. But I guess we should get
some
work done today, even if it’s only buying groceries. Just wondering how you’re doing.”

“I was fine this morning, and I’m still fine.” Cal’s concern gave Jim a warm glow in his chest to accompany the flutters he felt in his stomach whenever they touched. He supposed that would go away eventually, but he hoped not. “More than fine.”

“Not too sore?”

Jim shifted on the seat. “Just a little. But—” He hesitated before forging on. “I like it. It’s as though I can still feel it. Feel
you
.”

Cal dipped his hand farther and caressed Jim’s inner thigh. “Keep talking like that and you’ll definitely need to pull over. Somewhere with a lot of trees and no people. In this rain, no one will be around.”

The desire flooding Jim’s groin sent a shiver up his spine. “Extremely tempting.” Ahead, the rooftops of Tivoli came into sight. “But we should wait until we get home.”

With an exaggerated sigh, Cal removed his hand. “Always playing hard to get, Jim Bennett.”

Jim chuckled. “This time I’ll only make you wait an hour or two instead of six years.”

Cal reached out again, taking Jim’s hand off the wheel and squeezing briefly. “It was worth the wait.”

The warmth in Jim’s chest spread, and he smiled as he pulled up to the curb by the general store. When he turned off the engine and looked at the sidewalk, he groaned. “Great.”

“What?”

“Rebecca.” He pointed to where she walked down the street in their direction holding a floral umbrella. “She’s bound to talk our ears off. So much for being home before long.”

“What’s your problem with her?” Cal frowned.

Jim blinked. “I don’t have a
problem
. I’m just eager to get home.” He glanced around, even though he knew no one could hear them inside the truck. “Eager to be with you. We only have a few days alone.”

But Cal’s expression didn’t soften. “No, that’s not it. What is it about her?”

It was Jim’s turn to frown. “I don’t know. Why does it matter?”

“I just feel badly for her. She’s lonely, Jim. She wants a friend. It’s not like you to be unkind.”

“I never said I didn’t like her! I just…” Jim grasped for the right words, but nothing came. “And how do you know she’s lonely? You met her for, what, five minutes?”

“Actually, we had coffee last month one day when I came into town.”

Jim was taken aback. “Oh. Why didn’t you mention it?”

“I didn’t think I had to.”

“That’s not what I meant.” Jim was adrift, not sure how things had suddenly become so tense.

“I’m going to say hello.” Cal opened the door and waved to Rebecca as he hopped out.

Jim hurried to join them on the sidewalk under the general store’s awning, which protected them from the rain.

Rebecca smiled brightly. “Good afternoon, Cal. Jim.”

“You look lovely today,” Cal said.

In her light blue summer dress that complemented her blonde hair, she did indeed look lovely. But what was Cal doing?
Is he trying to make me jealous?
Jim cleared his throat. “Yes, you’re looking well, Rebecca.”

“Thank you, gentlemen. I’ve decided I’m not going to let a little rain dampen my spirits today. Jim, how is Sophie enjoying her summer vacation so far?”

“She’s visiting her grandparents. I’m sure she and Adam are having a nice time.” With a flare of guilt he realized he’d thought of little else but Cal and himself since he’d driven back from the Catskills.

He hoped they were getting along all right with Lorraine and Ronald, and weren’t missing home too much. He should call to make sure. He should have called first thing in the morning, but had been too distracted. A flush traveled up his neck.

“I’m sure. That’ll be nice for them to spend some time where their mother grew up.”

The previous warmth in Jim’s chest now burned hollowly, the thought of Ann increasing his guilt tenfold. He cleared his throat. “Yes.”

“And nice for you two to have some time to yourselves, I’m sure.”

The bottom of Jim’s stomach dropped out, and he forced his lungs to expand. “What do you mean by that?”

Blinking, Rebecca opened and closed her mouth before saying, “Just that I’m sure you could use a break. The children must keep you so busy. I didn’t intend any offense.”

Cal patted her arm. “Of course not. It is good to have a bit of a break, isn’t it, Jim?” Cal glared at him.

Jim’s mind whirled. When he and Cal were alone he’d felt so certain of his feelings, but now he wasn’t so sure. He’d allowed himself to be swept up into this…whatever
this
was with Cal, and he was struck by the notion that Rebecca somehow knew—that her eyes bored straight into him and saw the sickness inside. Frank Bell and his wife passed by on the sidewalk, and their gaze felt hot on Jim’s face.

They all know.

“Jim?” Cal stepped closer.

His heart pounding, Jim jumped back. “I have to go.” He resisted the urge to run. The shame choked him as he escaped inside the store, not waiting for a response.

He grabbed a basket and tossed in items, reaching blindly for cans on the shelf. Through the window, he could see Rebecca and Cal talking. What had Cal told her when they’d had coffee? Surely he hadn’t said anything about his feelings for Jim?
Does she know?

“All right there, Jim?” Mrs. Abbott asked.

He jerked his gaze to the front counter. “What?”

She smiled kindly. “You’re looking a little peaked today, dear.”

She knows. She sees what
I really am
.
His voice was little more than a croak. “There’s nothing wrong with me.”

Mrs. Abbott frowned, and the bell
dinged
as Cal entered the store alone. Jim continued filling up the basket as Cal exchanged pleasantries with Mrs. Abbott. When Cal came over, he pitched his voice low. “Is it any wonder Rebecca thinks you don’t like her? What’s gotten into you?”

Jim could only shake his head in response.

Cal clasped Jim’s arm with a frown. “Hey, it’s okay. You’re shaking. Did something happen…are you thinking about Okinawa?”

Squirming out of Cal’s grasp, Jim jerked his head around. They were alone, Mrs. Abbott having disappeared into the stockroom, where he could hear her humming. “They know,” he whispered.

“Know what?” Realization flickered across Cal’s face. “No. You’re being paranoid.”

“I can tell. They all know. You told her,” he accused.

“Jim, you’re wrong. You said this morning that you trusted me. So trust me now. Everything’s okay.”

At the thought of the morning and what they’d done—Cal moving inside him, stretching him open and filling him—shame and lust battled within. Lord in heaven, it had been so good, and he wanted to do it again and again. He wanted to fuck Cal and be fucked by him, and a little voice inside said it didn’t matter who knew. He couldn’t stop.

Cal eased the basket from Jim’s grip. “Let’s finish this and get back home.” He peered inside. “I don’t think we need seven cans of applesauce considering you have a never-ending supply in the icebox.”

As Jim breathed deeply, the panic began to subside. He stood there uselessly while Cal finished the shopping and made small talk with Mrs. Abbott. He let Cal propel him out to the truck, and he climbed into the passenger seat, his eyes unfocused as Cal drove them back toward Clover Grove.