Sellout (20 page)

Quiana rolled her eyes and went off to grab some punch and cookies.

“OKAY, FOLKS, LET’S eat,” Tilly called. The next night we were gathered in Tilly’s apartment, celebrating. We’d moved all the living room furniture aside and set up a large table to make room for the guests. “Last one to the table gets to serve all the plates.”

I followed my parents, Khalik, Heather, Stephanie, Quiana, Red, Ms. Rose, Monique, Rochelle, Maria, Shaunda, Coach, and Rex into Tilly’s kitchen. She had overdone it with the food as usual, but I was glad, one last meal to share with her before I headed back home. It was bittersweet.

I couldn’t wait to drive past the Welcome to Adams Park sign on the highway, but I was also so sad to be leaving Tilly and the few people I had come to know and care about at Amber’s Place.

“Tilly, this looks fantastic, as usual,” my mom said. “One day maybe I’ll be able to throw down like this.”

“I don’t think so, girl,” Tilly said sarcastically. “You’d actually have to know where a stove was kept for that to ever happen.”

We all laughed. I looked around the room at all my favorite people and felt overwhelmed. For the first time in a long time, I found a place where I fit in.

Heather munched on her salad and croutons, apparently some diet she’d started at home after Marcia told her she’d been gaining too much weight. Quiana had sat next to her to taunt her with a full plate of fried chicken and mashed potatoes.

The adults chatted quietly while shoving food in their mouths at the same time. Khalik, Rex, and my dad talked sports loudly. I wanted to remember this night. I didn’t want it to ever end.

I dabbled in my macaroni and cheese, but couldn’t really concentrate on food. I heard the words coming from the table and the noise coming from the street, but my head was overwhelmed with all that had happened in such a short span of time.

“NaTasha, what are you thinking about over there?” my mom asked.

“Oh, nothing, I was just thinking about how great this trip has been,” I said. “Tilly, you were right, this experience has changed me.”

Mom and Tilly exchanged looks. Heather jumped in, even with her mouth full of tomato.

“I’m glad to have my best friend back so we can get back to ballet,” she said. “I talked with Marcia about getting you back into rehearsal and she agreed, if you’ll just make a few changes. Isn’t that great, Tash?”

“Actually,” I said, with everyone at the long table watching
me, “I had a few changes of my own in mind. Ballet really isn’t my thing. And I’m done trying to please everyone around me. If it’s all the same to all of you, I’d prefer to just be me.”

Rex started clapping and then so did everyone else. I half stood and took a bow, laughing with the group. It felt good.

“While I have everyone’s attention,” I said, “I want to thank my parents for encouraging me to come. And thanks to Tilly for having me and for her good advice.”

“You are welcome, baby,” she said, “I’m just so glad my grandbaby came to stay with me.”

“Actually, I have been thinking about staying here,” I said quickly. Everyone looked confused. My mom looked shocked. My dad smiled and kept eating. Heather had dropped her fork into her salad and looked close to tears. I looked at Quiana and Khalik to see their reactions. Quiana rolled her eyes. Khalik smiled. I smiled, too, and held up my hands in surrender. “But, I know I have some unfinished business to deal with back home that I can’t keep hiding from.”

“Well, if you change your mind, you know you’re always welcome,” Tilly said. “Who wants pie?"

While I bathed in Tilly’s tub that night, I felt relaxed and relieved. I knew I had made the right decision to go home. Tilly knocked on the bathroom door with a bowl of ice cream in her hand and held it up to me.

“You interested?” she asked, grinning from ear to ear. She was wearing a white nightgown with red apples on it and still wore her new bracelet.

“You know I am,” I said.

I met my grandmother out in the living room and she handed me a fresh bowl of mint chocolate chip. We kicked our feet up and stared out the window.

“You glad I came, Tilly?” I asked her.

“Yeah, I’m glad, baby,” she said. She started humming “I Won’t Turn Back, Lord” and I grinned. I closed my eyes and listened to her song.

Copyright © 2010 by Ebony Joy Wilkins

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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Wilkins, Ebony Joy.
Sellout / by Ebony Joy Wilkins.—1st ed.
p. cm.

Summary: NaTasha loves her life of affluence in Adams Park, but her grandmother fears she has lost touch with her roots and whisks her off to Harlem, where NaTasha meets rough, streetwise girls at a crisis center and finds the courage to hold her own against them.

[1. Self-realization—Fiction. 2. African Americans—Fiction. 3. Social classes—
Fiction. 4. Identity—Fiction.
5.
Grandmothers—Fiction. 6. Ballet—Fiction.
7. New York (N.Y.)—Fiction.] I. Title.
PZ7.W64853Sel 2010
[Fic]—dc22
2009020522

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e-ISBN 978-0-545-28321-2

Cover photograph by Michael Frost
Cover design by Lillie Howard