Seinfeld Reference: The Complete Encyclopedia (52 page)

BOOK: Seinfeld Reference: The Complete Encyclopedia
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Note:
Bruce Davison costarred on "Harry and the Hendersons" (1990-93), had a recurring role as Captain Wyler on "Hunter" (1985-86), and appeared in the movies
Spies Like Us
(1985),
The Crucible
(1996), and
X-Men
(2000).

136.
"The Soul Mate" (9.26.96).
  This episode involves characters meeting their ideal relationship partner--their soul mate.  Jerry has doubts about Pam until Kramer expresses interest in her.  Kramer utilizes Newman's poetic talents to romance Pam, but Newman ceases the modern-day Cyrano de Bergerac routine to acquire insider information on his soul mate--Elaine.  Meanwhile, Elaine's soul mate, Kevin (bizarro Jerry in episode 137), proves his eternal devotion by undergoing vasectomy surgery. 
Subplot:
George is assigned the task of finding a poem for the foundation, but is more interested in determining whether the other board members believe that he killed Susan.

Written By: Peter Mehlman
Directed By: Andy Ackerman
Characters: Wayne Knight (Newman), Bruce Davison (Wyck), Tim DeKay (Fred), Lisa Mende (Carol), Kim Myers (Pam), Rende Rae Norman (Ms. Baines), Tommy Hicks (Mr. Cross), Jill Talley (Gail), Jill Holden (Lisa)
Note:
Kevin is listed as Fred in the show credits.

137. 
"The Bizarro Jerry" (10.3.96).
  Elaine's boyfriend, Kevin, is the direct opposite of Jerry in every conceivable way--friends, behavior and apartment.  Elaine begins spending time with Kevin and his friends, at the expense of Jerry and his friends. 
Subplots:
Using a widower story and photograph of Jerry's girlfriend, George attracts beautiful women and enters the forbidden city as a member of the "in crowd."  Jerry dates an attractive model, but cannot see beyond her man-hands.  When Kramer is mistaken as a Brandt-Leland employee, he assumes the position, which causes relationship tensions because he rarely spends time with Jerry.

Written By: David Mandel
Directed By: Andy Ackerman
Characters: Tim DeKay (Kevin), Kristin Bauer (Gillian), Pat Kilbane (Bizarro Kramer), Kyle T. Hefner (Bizarro George), Justina Vail (Amanda), J. Patrick McCormack (Leland), Harry Murphy (Office Manager), Dana Patrick (Model #1), Shireen Crutchfield (Model #2), Robin Nance (Model #3), Mark S. Larson (Bizarro Newman), James Lesure (Office Worker), Jason Beck (Bouncer)

138.
"The Little Kicks" (10.10.96).
  Elaine organizes an elegant company party but loses respect after engaging in a dance routine that resembles a full-body dry heave set to music.  She blames George, and then warns a coworker to keep her distance because he is a bad seed.  When this incites romantic interest, George continues the bad-boy facade by bootlegging a movie. 
Subplots:
Jerry is forced at gunpoint to bootleg the movie
Death Blow
, but in the process finds his niche in life.  Despite creating a cinematic masterpiece, he resists performing another illegal act, so Kramer makes his less-than-spectacular directorial debut.

Written By: Spike Feresten
Directed By: Andy Ackerman
Characters: Jerry Stiller (Frank), Neil Giuntoli (Brody), Rebecca McFarland (Anna), Joseph Urla (Dugan), Tim O'Hare (Vendor)

139.
"The Package" (10.17.96).
  Jerry is frustrated with a defective stereo, so Kramer offers him a full refund, which entails a mail fraud scam.  The post office becomes suspicious, and Newman conducts a formal investigation.  At first there is no conclusive evidence, but the case is firmly established by a photograph of Jerry repairing the defective stereo. 
Subplots:
George is attracted to a woman at the one-hour photo lab.  When a sexy lingerie photo appears amongst his prints, he returns the favor with enticing snapshots of himself.  Elaine is blacklisted by the medical establishment for being a difficult patient, and when she elicits the assistance of Kramer and Uncle Leo, all three are blacklisted.

Written By: Jennifer Crittenden
Directed By: Andy Ackerman
Characters: Wayne Knight (Newman), Len Lesser (Uncle Leo), Richard Roat (Dr. Berg), Fort Atkinson (Dr. Stern), David Purdham (Dr. Resnick), Heather Campbell (Sheila), Ramon Franco (Mailman), Bari K. Willerford (Ron), Shuko Akune (Receptionist), F. William Parker (Country Doctor), Lynn A. Henderson (Clerk), Bill Gratton (Postal Official), Susan Leslie (Nurse)

140.
"The Fatigues" (10.31.96).
  This episode recounts the dual story line of Elaine Benes and Frank Costanza vis-à-vis army fatigues.  Elaine is petrified by Eddie, a psychotic, army fatigue-wearing mail room employee, so she promotes him.  When the catalogue copywriters quit in protest, Elaine and Eddie become an effective team.  Meanwhile, Frank Costanza forsakes cooking retirement to prepare culinary delights for Kramer's Jewish singles night event. 
Subplot:
Kenny Bania indirectly causes a chasm in two relationships--Jerry's romance with Abby, and her mentor-protégée relationship with Cynthia.  Jerry agrees to function as Bania's comedic mentor, while Abby becomes George's protégée and prepares a report on risk management.

Written By: Gregg Kavet & Andy Robin
Directed By: Andy Ackerman
Characters: Estelle Harris (Estelle), Jerry Stiller (Frank), Stephen Hytner (Bania), Richard Herd (Wilhelm), Joseph Urla (Dugan), Ned Bellamy (Eddie), A.J. Langer (Abby), Katie Layman (Cynthia), Eddie Allen (Doctor), Gwen McGee (Janine), Lynn Manning (Blind Man)

141.
"The Checks" (11.7.96).
  After becoming a successful act in Japan and receiving hundreds of nominal royalty checks each day, Jerry spends most of his time convincing Elaine's boyfriend that he is not financially destitute.  In addition, Jerry begins negotiating with Japanese television executives about purchasing the defunct "Jerry" series, and experiences hostility from an umbrella street vendor. 
Subplots:
Kramer assists Japanese tourists in spending their money; then kindly houses them in an oversize chest of drawers.  Elaine dates a man entranced by the song "Desperado," so she searches for a song they can share.  George anticipates brainwashing propaganda from employees of Sunshine Cleaners.

Written By: Steve O'Donnell and Tom Gammill & Max Pross
Directed By: Andy Ackerman
Characters: James Patrick Stuart (Brett), Richard Herd (Wilhelm), Gedde Watanabe (Mr. Oh), Sab Shimono (Executive #1), John Bowman (Teddy), Jock Plotnick (Crew Leader), George Wallace (Doctor), Toshi Toda (Mr. Tanaka), Goh Misawa (Mr. Yamaguchi), Tony V. (Clicky), Akane Nelson (Executive #2), Cherie Hankal (Nurse)

142.
"The Chicken Roaster" (11.14.96).
  When a fast food restaurant's red neon light inhibits Kramer's sleep pattern, he attempts to force the business to close.  Since the chicken restaurant is managed by a college friend, Jerry protects Seth's job by switching apartments with Kramer.  Soon the living environment shapes their personalities--Jerry acquires Kramer's characteristics, and vice versa--but a chicken addiction forces a return to normalcy. 
Subplots:
Elaine makes lavish purchases on a corporate expense account but an internal audit prompts a trip to Burma to justify the sable hat expenditure.  George extends the dating relationship by leaving a sable hat at Heather's apartment.

Written By: Alec Berg & Jeff Schaffer
Directed By: Andy Ackerman
Characters: Wayne Knight (Newman), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Mark Roberts (Seth), Kymberly Kalil (Heather), Michael D. Roberts (Ipswich), Wesley Leong (Clerk), Christopher Aguilar (Burmese Boy)

143.
"The Abstinence" (11.21.96).
  George abstains from sex while his girlfriend has mononucleosis.  Sexual temperance transforms him into an astute intellectual, but after calculating the odds, he sacrifices the depletion of knowledge for a sexual dalliance with a Portuguese waitress.  Meanwhile, Elaine experiences the opposite effect--becoming a child-like imbecile--after forcing her boyfriend to abstain from sex until passing the medical licensing exam. 
Subplots:
Jerry is bumped from career day, so his booking agent arranges a school assembly gig.  Kramer opens a smoking lounge in his apartment; the intense exposure turns him into a hideous freak so he sues the tobacco companies.

Written By: Steve Koren
Directed By: Andy Ackerman
Characters: Phil Morris (Jackie Chiles), Debra Jo Rupp (Katie), Brenda Strong (Sue Ellen), Bob Odenkirk (Ben), Meagen Fay (Mrs. Burns), Tamara Bick (Louise), Alex Trebek (Himself), Derek Jeter (Himself), Bernie Williams (Himself), Lawrence A. Mandley (Larry the Cook), Fern Fitzgerald (Ms. Wilkie), Noelle Balfour (Waitress), Kyle Gass (Smoker), Judy Kerr (Woman)

144.
"The Andrea Doria" (12.19.96).
  George's attempt at acquiring an apartment is thwarted by a man who survived the
Andrea Doria
shipwreck.  George decides to tell the tenant association about his pathetic life, and despite the heart-wrenching appeal, loses the apartment to Elaine's ex-boyfriend. 
Subplots:
Elaine's boyfriend is a bad breaker-upper; ex-girlfriends physically assault him, and eventually Elaine stabs him in the forehead with a fork.  Jerry expedites Newman's transfer to Hawaii by delivering the mail, but a high accuracy rate nixes the relocation.  Kramer visits a veterinarian for a wheezing cough, and begins developing dog characteristics.

Written By: Spike Feresten
Directed By: Andy Ackerman
Characters: Wayne Knight (Newman), Estelle Harris (Estelle), Jerry Stiller (Frank) Tom Gallop (Alan), Ray Stricklyn (Clarence), Diana Bellamy (Mrs. Ricardi), Rick Hall (Vet), Carl Banks (Policeman #1), Barry Cutler (Policeman #2), Kev O'Neil (Waiter), Ossie Mair (Driver), Fred Pinkard (Old Man), Rene Weisser (Ex-girlfriend), Brian Blondell (Dog Guy), Theresa Mulligan (Woman), Florinel Fatulesco (Stand Owner)

145.
"The Little Jerry" (1.9.97).
  Kramer inadvertently purchases a rooster, named Little Jerry, which has an aptitude for cockfighting.  A local store owner, Marcelino, arranges a fight, and agrees to cease the public display of Jerry's bounced check.  When Little Jerry is asked to take a dive in round three, Big Jerry begins conditioning the rooster. 
Subplots:
George tours a women's prison and begins dating an inmate; however, when she becomes eligible for parole, he sabotages her chances.  Elaine convinces her head-shaving boyfriend to regrow his hair.  When there is noticeable receding, he consults George for advice, and in desperation proposes marriage to Elaine.

Written By: Jennifer Crittenden
Directed By: Andy Ackerman
Characters: Barney Martin (Morty), Liz Sheridan (Helen), John Michael Higgins (Kurt), Miguel Sandoval (Marcelino), Andrea Bendewald (Celia), Kathryn Joosten (Betsy), Paul Perri (Detective Danner), Al White (Detective Udewitz), Ray Proscia (Guard)

146.
"The Money" (1.16.97).
  Jerry's parents sell the Cadillac to financially support their only son who bounced a check in the prior episode.  Jerry attempts to prove his good fortune by repurchasing the Cadillac and feigning numerous comedy gigs.  George anticipates a lucrative inheritance, and then watches his parents squander their life savings. 
Subplots:
Elaine receives a promotion and sizable raise, but before her inevitable demotion, she forces Jerry's father to resign.  Kramer's girlfriend is a bed hog, so they agree to spend their nights apart.  When Kramer suspects a cat burglar in the hallway, he is forced to reside with the Costanzas.

Written By: Peter Mehlman
Directed By: Andy Ackerman
Characters: Liz Sheridan (Helen), Barney Martin (Morty), Jerry Stiller (Frank), Estelle Harris (Estelle), John O'Hurley (J. Peterman), Sandy Baron (Jack Klompus), Sarah Silverman (Emily), Leon W. Grant (Counterperson)

147.
"The Comeback" (1.30.97).
  When a coworker, Reilly, dishes insults at a company meeting, George is furious because he cannot devise the perfect comeback.  After formulating the perfect retort, he arranges another company meeting to lure Reilly into the web of insults. 
Subplots:
Jerry is bribed by an incompetent tennis pro to throw a match.  Elaine is captivated by a video store employee's list of recommended movies and contemplates a romantic relationship, until meeting the 15-year-old adolescent.  After watching a movie about terminal illness, Kramer prepares a living will and asks Elaine to be the cold-hearted executor.

Written By: Gregg Kavet & Andy Robin
Directed By: David Owen Trainor
Characters: Mark Harelik (Milos), Ben Stein (Shellbach), Joel Polis (Reilly), Ivana Milaivich (Patty), Danny Strong (Vincent), Richard Livingston (Bill), Charles Kahlenberg (Fred), Stan Sellers (McAdam), Peggy Mannix (Woman), Fatima Lowe (Secretary), Nancy Linehan Charles (Woman Executive), Jeff Hatz (Manager)
Note:
Mark Harelik had a recurring role on "Wings" (1993-96) as Davis Lynch, Helen's boyfriend, and appeared in
The Swan Princess
(1994) and
Jurassic Park III
(2001).  Joel Polis is often recognized for his recurring role in "Cheers" as Gary, the bartender and owner of Gary's Olde Towne Tavern. He has a long list of guest appearance roles in television shows, and appeared in the movies
The Thing
(1982),
The Rookie
(1990) and
Tumbleweeds
(1999).

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