Seductive Truths (Seductive Trilogy) (44 page)

     A crack of thunder and a flash of lightening, the clouds finally unleashes its wrath and the raindrops rapidly soak into my coat and swamp my hair causing it to stick against my cold cheek.

    
This just tops it off!

     With the threat of a continuous downpour I heave myself to my feet and amble my way out of the park, slight limp accompanying it from where I twisted my ankle when I went down.

     Sore head, sore heart and now a sore ankle, my life just keeps on getting better and better!    

     A flash of lightening stings my eyes as it lights up the darkened sky, which is swiftly followed by a roll of thunder that reaches deep inside my soul bringing all the hatred and fear to the surface.  My coat weighs me down with its water retention making each step feel like the last. 
I knew I should have brought a waterproof one
.

     I abounded the umbrella ages ago.  It was more of a hindrance than a help what with the gale of wind thrashing by every time I opened it causing it to turn inside out, so instead it lies limp and useless at my side.

     My body is cold but too numb to feel.  My feet are damp due to the leak in my shoes which have soaked my socks straight through.  Hair sticks to my skin like glue with drips gliding off to follow a trail down my neck and disappear between my breasts.  I shiver as the chill takes control, but I ignore it.

     People rush by to find the nearest shelter.  Lonely umbrellas swirl in the wind’s current after their owners gave up hope taming the objects.  Cars dominate the roads and splash through each and every puddle, the occasional unfortunate pedestrian gets caught in the blast.  All this is nothing but background action.

     My mind is preoccupied with the recent turn of events.  Peters.  Peters and his implications.  What did he think he would achieve by threatening me?  How dare he judge what I am and am not capable of?  I know what I am getting myself into.  Maybe I didn’t at first, but being with Gareth, to feel his arms around me, to hear the comfort of his scratchy voice, the smell of
him
, it all feels so right.  There is no easy way to describe it, it simply exists.  He’s more toxic than any drug, but he’s my choice of addiction.

     Lost in thought I walk past a shop window when the display catches my eye and I stop.  Retracing my steps back I stand staring at the glistening objects dazzling with the aim to entice as many of the public into the building as they can.  Sparkles, that’s the name.  It’s a gorgeous little shop full of endless selections of jewellery to choose from for any occasion.  William brought me here to select my engagement ring.

     I remember standing here as I am now; face almost plastered to the window, massive smile on my face that I couldn’t remove even if I wanted to.  He stood behind me, arms wrapped around my waist as he whispered in my ear,
‘
This is our future.  Somewhere in there is a ring with your name on it.  Find it, choose it and it’s yours, Mrs Jones.
’
  It’s now nothing more than a tainted memory.

     I know life with Gareth will not create bittersweet memories, I’ve experienced too much already to expect otherwise, but what I can’t bear thinking about is not having the chance to create something!  That thought alone is enough to swell the emotions and I feel them clogging my throat.

     A honking of a car horn jolts me back to here and now and it is only then do I really take in my surroundings.  The bank that went up in flames several years ago, the corner shop I remember running to after school to fill myself up on sweets and the quaint nursery I used to love going to.  I remember my mum telling me that I would always leave that place with a smile on my face.  If only life was as simple as then.  

     Maggie’s place is not a couple of minutes’ walk away after heading around that corner.  I look down at my watch.

    
Five to one!  Think I should head back
.

     I begin to walk in the direction of Maggie’s house when a sudden tingle shoots up my spine.  It’s the feeling you get when you think somebody is watching you.  Instantly I turn behind me to investigate, but no one is there.  Well, no one out of the ordinary, just a group of teenagers out on their lunch break enjoying a chat and a bite to eat.  There’s also a man in his
business suit, phone plastered to his ear and shoving coffee down his neck.  Over the other side of the road are more people of no consequence.  No one stands out.

     Shrugging it off as nothing more than jitters, I carry onwards but picking up my pace.  However, the feeling follows my every step, but this time I swear I hear footsteps, which speeds up along with mine.

     Clip-clop.

     Clip-clop.

     Clip-clop, clip-clop.

     Clip-clop, clip-clop.

     Clip-clop, clip-clop, clip-clop.

     Clip-clop, clip-clop, clip-clop.

     Just when the panic is about to take hold of me I see Maggie’s house and sprint the rest of the distance, not stopping till I reach her door.  The pulse in my neck echoes in my ear drowning out everything but my heavy footsteps pounding the pavement and the crashing of my heart against my ribs.

     I almost collide with the front door, too consumed with getting away from whatever is chasing me I forget to slow down.

     Panting, hand clutching my chest, I ring the doorbell repeatedly, occasionally giving a brief glance over my shoulder to make sure no one is near.  Though I do not see anyone my conscience is still pricked.  

    A screaming child makes me jump on the spot and I increase my ringing, my finger becoming sore with the force of my presses.     

    
‘
I’m coming, I’m coming!  No need to damage my bell!
’
I hear Maggie’s irritation leak through the door.

    
‘
Ye…
’
but I don’t give her chance to finish.

     Instead I come bounding into the house, chuck the umbrella on the floor and then swiftly slam the door and bolt lock it, all in one rushed movement.

    
‘
What the…what the hell is wrong with you?
’

     I can’t breathe for lack of oxygen, back slumping against the door, the only thing keeping me from falling to my knees.  I am by no means an unfit person, but that spurt of exercise and the adrenaline powering around my bloodstream leaves me winded.

    
‘
Ju-just give m-me a mi-minute,
’
I say holding a finger up briefly, the other hand clutching my side, eyes closed with head tilting forward slightly.

    
‘
Have you been running?  Why have you been running?
’
  Her tone goes an octave higher and I hear the underlining fear in her last question. 

    
‘
It’s okay, everything is fine.
’
  I step away from the door to comfort Maggie. 
‘
I thought someone was…
’

    
Click-clack
.

     The clanging sound of the letter box freezes me to the bone and causes me to jump back, my hand clutching Maggie’s.  Spinning around I see a slip of paper float to the carpet.  

    
Not another one!

     Cautiously I bend down to retrieve it.  The paper is still warm from the person’s touch, like whomever it is from held it in their hand for a reasonable amount of time.  Maybe they were in indecision whether or not to go through with posting it.

    
‘
What is it?
’
Maggie whispers behind me.

     Turning the paper over I carefully read the printed text in the centre, which doesn’t take long considering it consists of only four words.

You are not alone

    
What does that mean?  How am I not alone?  Who’s not alone?  Maggie?  Bethany?  Me?  I don’t get it!  They could still be out there
and with that in mind I quickly yank the front door open, dart out and rapidly look up and down the road, attempting to pick out anyone who looks out of place.  No luck.  The street is deserted but for the occasional car driving past.

    
‘
Alex?
’
 

     Turning back round I see Maggie standing in the doo
rway, anxiety and confusion shi
ning in her eyes, hands clutching the piece of paper I must have dropped in my haste.

    
‘
This has gone too far now Alex, we need to call the police.
’

    
What? No!

    
‘
No, please Maggie, we mustn’t do that.  The police can’t get involved in this.  We can’t say a word!
’

    
‘
Are you out of your mind Alex?
’
  She begins to reach for the phone in the hallway. 
‘
Can’t you see we are in danger?  This has got to be William.  He’s killed once, what’s to say he won’t do it again.  What’s stopping him from killing us?
’

     Before she can dial the emergency number I knock the phone from her hand.  It goes skidding across the floor, the back coming off.

    
‘
You promised you wouldn’t say a word Maggie.
’

    
‘
Yes, I made a promise, but that was before this arrived!
’
  She brandishes the paper in front of me. 
‘
It needs to stop now, for our safety, for Bethany’s
’

    
‘
Don’t you see?  By calling the police you’ll be doing the exact opposite!
’

    
How can I make her see sense!

    
‘
That is not possible.  Police will only help matters.  William can’t get away with it.  I want justice done for Thomas and if calling the police is the only way then so be it.
’

     She turns on her heels and strides towards the backless, but still working phone.  However, before she is able to pick it up something inside me snaps causing me to act irrationally out of fear.  Fear of what though?  Gareth being found out?  Because that is what will inevitably happen if the police get involved.  Then there’s Peters.  He’d love to see Gareth go down.

     I grab Maggie’s shoulders, spin her around and pin her against the banisters.  An easy achievable task in light of her petite frame compared to mine.

    
‘
I said don’t!
’
  A threat implied in every word. 
I do not like the sound of that.

     The shock on her face quickly morphs into distress.  Pupils expand; eyebrows raise high on her forehead, mouth slightly agape.  Even her breathing has quickened.

    
What am I doing?

    
‘
Alex, you’re scaring me.
’

    
I’m scaring myself!  What am I turning in to?

    
‘
I-I’m sorry. I-I-I don’t know what has come over me.
’

     I slowly let go, take a step backwards and face away in shame.

     Everything is slipping through my fingers.  My world is crumbling down around me and I am powerless to stop it.  I am becoming someone I dislike.  A monster.  Is it being with Gareth that has turned me into this despicable creature or the truth of everything, of William, of my brother’s death?  I don’t know what to do anymore.  I don’t know what the right course of action is. 

     My head is agrees with Maggie.  Yes, I should inform the police, Thomas deserves justice and William needs to be punished, but my heart…My heart wants to run away and start a new life elsewhere with Gareth by my side and to forget everything.  But I can’t do that.  I can’t desert Maggie and Bethany like that.  It’s not fair on them.  They are the innocent party trapped in the centre of this mess. 

     The dead weight of my body pulls me down to the floor, back cushioned against the wall leaving me in a scrunched up position, hands interlocked resting against my chin, eyes fixed unseeing to an insignificant spot ahead.

     Tick.

     Tock.

     Tick.

     Tock.

     The mantle clock in her living room is sounding deafening in the intense atmosphere.  Our mellow breathing settles like debris after a storm.

     I hear shuffling of material then out of the corner of my eye I see Maggie kneel at my side, the paper still clutched in her hand.  After a slight pause she brings her free hand up to gingerly rest on my knee.  The warmth in the contact relaxes my tense body. 
I didn’t even realise I was tensing!