Seduced in the Dark (49 page)

“Caleb!” I yelled. When he didn’t answer, I
crawled toward him, terrified of what I might find when I reached
him. He wasn’t moving. He was covered in blood and he wasn’t
moving! I pulled his head into my lap and tapped the side of his
face, “Caleb? Wake up, baby. Wake up! We have to go.” There was no
reaction. “Please. Please, God!” I put my hand on his chest. He was
breathing.

I could hear shouting from outside. People
running and squealing tires leaving the parking lot. Cops would be
here soon. I put Caleb’s head down and grabbed his shirt to sit him
up. “Wake up! Please!” I shook him. His head fell forward and he
coughed blood onto my pants. “Oh! Oh! Thank you!” I pulled him to
my chest, running my hands all over him.

“Livvie,” he said. And then he really woke
up, “Livvie!” He pulled back and stared at me in shock. He pushed
me to one side and looked behind me, then back to my face. “Are you
okay?” he said frantically.

I nodded, tears streaming down my face.

“We have to go,” he said. “Now. Get up.” He
pushed me up and I helped him stand. He grabbed my hand and stooped
down to scoop up the gun.

I ran to the pile of things next to the bed
and found the keys. I shoved everything else inside in one huge
ball.

“Get to the truck, Livvie,” Caleb said. He
seemed much too calm.

I ran across the parking lot, surprised to
discover there were no people out there anymore. I managed to get
the key into the lock and open the door. I scrambled inside and
slammed it shut.

I heard another gunshot and ducked. Nothing
happened for several seconds, but then the truck shook and I heard
a loud thud. I squeezed my eyes shut. The cab door opened.

“It’s me, Livvie. It’s me,” Caleb whispered.
He found the keys in my hand and pried them loose. He peeled out of
the parking lot as I shivered and cried on the seat next to him.
After a while, I felt his fingers in my hair, gently stroking my
head.

I had killed a man. I was covered in his
blood.

I had to do it. I’m not sorry.

And I wasn’t. I wasn’t sorry the son of a
bitch was dead. I’d known he was dead after I shot him the first
time. There was no way he could have survived the wound I’d given
him. I had shot him the second time because…I wanted to. He had
tried to kill me, but it was seeing Caleb’s motionless body, that
had ultimately filled me with rage. Caleb was mine. I was through
letting people take things from me.

We drove for a few hours. I had no idea
where we were and I didn’t care. I kept my head on Caleb’s lap and
let him touch me. Everything in my world made sense if Caleb kept
touching me.

Eventually, Caleb stopped the truck, but he
asked me to stay put while he took care of the body in the bed. The
final shot I had heard was Caleb shooting the guy in the face. He
didn’t want him identified. The guy in question had been Jair’s
cousin, Khalid.

I wanted to ask about Rafiq and the others,
but then I remembered the way Caleb had come back to the room,
shell-shocked and devoid of life. Some things were better left
unsaid. Caleb and I were alive. We were together. Everything else?
I didn’t need to know.

Caleb got back in the truck faster than I
would have expected. “It’s done,” he said.

“You buried him?” I asked doubtfully.

“No need. The animals can have him,” he
said. He reached across the seat and pulled my forehead toward his
lips. “I killed that man, Livvie. Do you understand?” he
whispered.

“What? No.”

“Livvie! Listen to what I’m telling you!” He
looked me dead in my eyes. His expression was hard and cold. “I
killed him.” He nodded his head until I mimicked him.

“Okay,” I whispered.

“Good girl,” he whispered and kissed me. Our
agreement was sealed.

***

I should have known what Caleb was planning.
There had been plenty of signs. I should have questioned him more
about what had traumatized him back at Felipe’s mansion. I should
have demanded to know the plan when I kept seeing signs for Texas.
At the very least, I should have asked more questions about the
piece of paper Caleb demanded I memorize. He said anyone with the
pass codes and account information could gain access and it was
important only he and I knew the information. I had felt so
special. I thought he trusted me. I had felt like a spy when I
burned the piece of paper and threw the ashes out the window.

I didn’t ask questions. I didn’t demand
answers. Instead, I had been completely blindsided when Caleb
stopped the truck and shattered my entire world by saying our time
together had come to an end.

We were both silent for a long time. I
didn’t want to be the first to speak, I was afraid I couldn’t.
Caleb finally cleared his throat and broke the silence, “The border
is just a few kilometers up the road. I can’t go any closer.” He
gestured to the blood all over him.

“What makes you think
I
can? I killed
–”

“You didn’t kill anyone!” He shouted. “You
were kidnapped. You’ve been trying to escape and for months…I’ve…I
kept you prisoner. I raped you,” he said.

His words were a knife in my heart and I
slapped him. Hard. “Don’t say that! I know how we started out,
Caleb. I know! But, please,” I begged. “I love you.”

Caleb’s eyes welled up with tears, but he
smiled and rubbed his face, “You slapped me,” he laughed.
“Again!”

“Why are you doing this, Caleb?” I asked as
calmly as I could, but already, my throat was thick with the sobs I
was trying to hold inside.

He looked at me and I could see the faintest
trace of something resembling the pain on my own face.
“Because…it’s the right thing to do.”

“Why can’t you let me decide for myself what
the right thing is? I want to stay with you.” I choked out. My
heart raced, and I could no longer hold back my tears. He was
giving me my chance to go home, to go back to my life, to go back
to everything I said I wanted – but all I could think was none of
it mattered if it meant I’d never see him again.

He gripped the steering wheel tightly and
pressed his forehead against it, “You don’t know what you want,
Livvie, and what you think you want, you’ve been brainwashed into
wanting.” I immediately took a breath in order to protest; he held
up his hand to stop me.

“I’ve been doing this a long time –
manipulating people to get my way. That’s why you think you love
me! Because I’ve broken you down and built you back up to believe
it. It wasn’t an accident! Once you leave this behind…you’ll see
that.”

I could barely see him through the mist of
tears clouding my vision. Caleb believed everything he said. I
could hear it in his voice – but he was wrong. He hadn’t
manipulated me into loving him. He’d tried to do the very
opposite.

“So, that’s it? You think I’m just some
idiot that fell for your bullshit! Well you’re wrong! I fell in
love with you, Caleb. I fell in love with your sick sense of humor.
I fell in love with the way you protected me. You saved my
life!”

“I went to collect my property, Livvie,” he
said solemnly.

“I’m not Livvie anymore! I’m yours! Isn’t
that what you said? Isn’t it what you promised? What we swore!” I
wept.

“I don’t want to own you. I want you to be
free and as long as you’re with me…I’ll always see you as my
slave,” he whispered.

I couldn’t stand the sight of Caleb’s head
bowed in shame. He was much too proud a person. “I was never your
slave, Caleb. You tried, I’ll give you that, but we both know you
belong to me, as much as I, belong to you. If you’d really been
able to break me down, and build me back up, neither of us would be
here. No matter how fucked up the circumstances, I genuinely fell
in love with you…and…and believe it or not…you love me too.”

“Kitten,” he said, “monsters can’t love.” He
swiped at his eyes, “Now, get out of the truck. Walk toward the
border, and don’t ever look back.”

Unable to control myself any longer I
wrapped my arms around him as tightly as I could. “I love you,
Caleb. I love you! If you care for me at all…please, don’t do this!
Please, don’t leave me. I don’t know how to live without you. Don’t
make me go back to trying to be someone I don’t know how to be
anymore.”

His arms gently guided me back, and when our
eyes met, I finally saw the emotions he tried so hard to keep
hidden, and the resolve with which he said, “Live for me, Kitten.
Be all those things you’d never be with me. Go to school. Meet a
normal boy and fall in love. Forget me. It’s time for you to go,
Kitten. Time for us both, to go.”

“Where will you go?”

“It’s best you don’t know.”

My heart sank, but I knew I had lost the
argument and there was no stopping this goodbye. I wanted to kiss
him then, just one last kiss to remember him by, but I knew kissing
him would only be torture. I wanted to remember our last kiss as
being one of passion and connection, not one of sadness and
regret.

I let him go and opened the door.

“Take this,” he whispered and pushed the gun
toward me. “It’s how you escaped.”

I stared at the gun for a long time. I even
contemplated taking Caleb hostage with it and forcing him to drive
us somewhere else. But he’d hurt me. His rejection stung more than
anyone’s and my pride wouldn’t let me beg him anymore.

I picked up the gun and stared at his
perfect profile as he stared out the windshield without a glance in
my direction. He’d made his choice and it wasn’t me. I stepped out
of the truck, slammed the door and started my trek toward the
border.

As I walked, I could feel his eyes on me,
the way I could always feel his eyes on me. Tears ran down my face
unabashed, but I didn’t move to wipe them away. I had earned those
tears, and I would wear them as a symbol of everything I had been
through. They represented all the pain I had suffered, the love I
felt, and the ocean of loss sweeping through my soul. I had finally
learned to obey and never looked back.

I was covered in blood and bruised when I
arrived at the border. In shock over everything that had happened
with Caleb, I didn’t respond well to the border patrol officers
screaming at me with raised weapons. I had a weapon of my own and I
wasn’t afraid to fucking use it. And if I died? Who the fuck
cared?

I put the gun to my head and demanded to be
let through.

The fucktards shot me.

I thought I would die, bleed out as they
wrestled me to the ground and handcuffed me. I didn’t know they had
shot me with rubber bullets.

Chapter
Twenty-Six

Day 14:

Matthew sat across from the former Miss
Olivia Ruiz. She looked like hell. Her long dark hair was pulled
away from her face into a severe bun. She had dark circles under
her eyes and she hadn’t been eating much. Her lack of food intake
had kept her at the hospital an additional 72 hours, but they
couldn’t keep her once she had decided she wanted to leave.

Agent Sloan was also in the room. The
revelations of the case had been difficult for her to swallow as
well and Matthew wished there were some way to comfort her without
leading her on. She had come to his room after visiting Olivia at
the hospital and learning about his and Olivia’s last conversation.
They spoke about the case for a while, but then she had wanted to
talk about the night they’d had sex and he had to let her know in
no uncertain terms it had been a one night affair. She’d called him
a coward. He’d called her worse.

“Is this the last piece of paper?” Sophia
Cole asked.

“Yes,” Matthew said. “Once you walk out of
this room, you’ll be Sophia Cole. In exchange for your silence on
the events of the last four months, the Bureau has dropped the
charges against you and given you a new identity. We will cover
your accrued medical expenses and you will be provided with the
airline ticket you requested. In addition, your mother will receive
the sum of $200,000 to be paid over five years. You understand,
should you violate the terms of your agreement with the U.S.
Government, you may be treated as a terrorist under the provisions
of the Patriot Act and subject to a $250,000 fine and potential
imprisonment. As a suspected terrorist, you may not be granted
access to a lawyer or formally charged. However, your case will be
reviewed every three years to make a determination on whether or
not you pose further threat. Do you understand the terms of this
agreement?” he asked.

“Yes,” Sophia whispered dully.

“Do you agree to the terms of this
agreement?” he asked.

“Yes,” Sophia said. “It’s not like I have
much of a choice.”

Matthew sighed heavily and his eyes briefly
met Sloan’s. She shook her head slightly, letting him know how much
she hated what was happening. Matthew hated it too, but his hands
were tied on the issue. “The U.S. Government has given you all the
things you’ve asked for, with the exception of returning into your
care the S&W Model 29 revolver confiscated when you were first
apprehended,” Matthew said.

“And the bad guys go free. Don’t forget that
part,
Agent
Reed,” Sophia said coldly.

Matthew was just as pissed off about that,
but he’d done his job and he’d bent as far as he could. “Your
assailants were never recovered at the auction in Karachi, Miss
Cole.” It felt wrong to call her by that name, but it was the one
she had chosen and Matthew would respect it. “The U.S. Government
sees no need to damage its relationship with Pakistan based on
unsubstantiated allegations. However, it will be mentioned in the
report that your statement led the joint task force to the auction
and resulted in the freeing of over 127 human trafficking victims
and the arrest of 243 potential traffickers.”

“Whatever, Reed. Are we done here? I’d like
to go,” Sophia said. Matthew didn’t take her disdain personally. He
knew the real reason for her distress and it had little to do with
the deal she was making – the deal she’d asked for. She was still
grieving over Caleb’s—
James’
death.