Seduced in the Dark (10 page)

I guess things between us were the same and
the differences didn’t matter.

What mattered is
I
was different. The
naïve girl in me had been bitch-slapped into womanhood. I’d been
razed by pain, grief, loss and suffering, and honed by lust, rage
and an acute awareness of my need to survive.

I understood things I couldn’t fathom
before. I understood Caleb’s need for revenge: because the seed had
been planted in me. I recognized how he often turned my body
against me: because the desire for him had always been there. Above
all else, I had learned the one thing every person has to learn to
make it through life: the only person you can truly count on is
yourself.

I was still reeling from Caleb’s display of
dominance over me when he finally laid me down to sleep. I should
have been angry with him, and in a very real way, I was, but the
way he had unleashed on me made me realize how thoughtful and
gentle he had been before. Dealing with Caleb was all about
perspective. You couldn’t appreciate his kindness until you’d felt
his cruelty. I had felt it, but even I, was smart enough to know
he’d still taken it easy on me.

He didn’t have to explain himself to me –
he’d made it plain. However, I knew he wanted me to understand the
danger I was in. He wanted me to think before I acted. He wanted me
to pick and choose my battles, even if those battles were with him.
He wanted me to survive. He’d told me as much in the car, but then
he’d shown me. For Caleb, that was kind. He dosed me again and I
drifted, thoughts swirling in my mind and none of them comforting.
Then Caleb was there, and his long, warm body was like a prayer I
held onto as I tried to stay awake and did not succeed.

I woke up crying. I could hear the shower
running and it was sickening how the relief washed through me,
knowing he was close. I forced myself to lie back down, to find a
position less aggravating to my injured shoulder or cracked
ribs.

I didn’t feel comfortable without his arm
around me. I couldn’t sleep without knowing he was near. He’d done
this to me. He’d made me afraid. He’d made me need him. And if he
thought he was suddenly going to abandon me and clear what was left
of his shriveled conscience, he was sadly mistaken.

A strange noise drew my attention away from
my thoughts. Regardless of my renewed fear, it was a welcome
distraction. I wondered for a moment if Caleb had hurt himself,
slipped in the shower or something, but there was no loud crash,
only a muffled sound. I listened intently, waiting for the noise to
repeat itself and was annoyed by the apparent loudness of my
breathing.

“Uh!” That was the noise. Like a grunt mixed
with a whimper. “Uh!” Something inside my belly tightened, muscle
memory. I should have ignored it, but I couldn’t. In spite of
everything that had happened to me, and everything Caleb had put me
through by deed or design, I still thought him the most beautiful
thing I’d ever seen.

“
Min fadlik!”
he sighed loudly, but I
didn’t know what it meant. Whatever it was though, it
sounded…needy. What did Caleb need? And why did I find the idea of
his need so intriguing?

I needed him to touch me, not want, because
I didn’t want him to, I
needed
him to. Only his arms wrapped
around me could make the nightmare dissipate, only the smell of him
made me forget the fetid breath of the men who had attacked me.
Only his. I was always grateful for his presence and resentful of
it.

More sounds came from the bathroom and I
couldn’t resist. I couldn’t stop the rush of adrenaline coursing
through my veins urging me into some kind of action, anything that
would reveal to me what was happening behind the closed door.
What if he’s fucking someone in there?
The thought stopped
me cold, a wave of something akin to nausea clogging my throat and
tightening my stomach. “He wouldn’t,” I whispered to myself in the
darkness of the room. For whatever reason I just couldn’t make it a
possibility in my mind.
He’s done it before. Remember? Remember
him fucking that woman while you were tied up in the other
room.
The voice in my head was cruel. I had to know! I had to
know if he would do something like that to me again.
Bastard!

I forced my steps toward the bathroom door,
my body trembled and my palms were wet with sweat, but I couldn’t
stop myself from knowing.

“Fuck…” The obscenity was little more than a
whisper beyond the door as I pressed my ear against it. “Oh…yes
baby” then something in another language, then “open your pussy.” I
nearly fell against the door as my knees went weak. Between my legs
I felt a gentle throbbing keeping pace with my heart
. Please,
please don’t be fucking someone else.

I could hear the fan was on, which might
have been why he felt safe making sounds. If I hadn’t been awake, I
wouldn’t have heard him. Forcing bravery I didn’t really feel, I
pressed on the latch to open the door. I gripped the latch in my
fist until sweat seemed to squeeze between my fingers. The shower
was to the left of the door, and I worried I wouldn’t be able to
see without opening it fully and making my presence known, but
there was a mirror to the right where I might be able to see his
reflection. I could only pray he wasn’t directly facing the door or
mirror.

The door opened, just a crack, barely enough
to get a finger through, but my heart felt crammed into my throat
for those breathless seconds. I waited, hoping not to hear him yell
at me or make a startled sound. I heard his heavy breathing and
those same groaning sounds from before, accompanied by a wet
staccato rhythm. I knelt on the floor, not trusting my legs to
support me as I pressed my cheek flush with the door and peeked
inside. The room was steamy and it aggravated me to no end. I
waited while some of it cleared, but all I could see was a shape in
the mirror.

I dared to open the door a little wider, my
adrenaline pumping through me in proportionate degrees to the
opening in front of me. More steam drifted out of the room and
settled on my face and neck, dripping like sweat into the well of
my breasts before being absorbed by my shirt. The mirror was much
clearer and finally, I could make out the image in the shower.

I gasped, but Caleb didn’t hear me. I was
sure he couldn’t. He was much too absorbed in what he was doing
alone in the shower, only a few feet away from my prying eyes. I
should have felt embarrassed or guilty but there was no way I could
feel those things. All I could feel was the throbbing between my
legs and the sharp pang of lust that punched me in the belly. He
was fucking…perfect. Sooo fucking perfect.

He was facing the shower so I could only see
him in profile. His skin was pink and white from the intensity of
the water. One arm was braced against the wall, his long legs
spread for balance as his head dipped toward his chest and he
panted. His other arm was rigid; the muscles tense while his large
hand held his enormous erection in his hand. I swallowed hard and
licked steam from my lips.

The head was thick and a deep dusky pink as
it slipped through his fist. His shaft got thicker toward the base,
until his fingers had to grip hard to keep him contained. I
remembered his weight in hand.

He didn’t shuttle his hand up and down the
length of it. He rocked his hips into his fist, making the
well-muscled globes of his ass hollow on each side as he thrust
forward, his large, heavy-looking balls swaying between his splayed
legs in a fluent rhythm. His cock was the arrow and his fist, the
quiver.

I couldn’t tear my eyes away, didn’t even
try. I wondered how much come he held inside those large balls and
if he’d given me all of it when he’d come in my hand and on my
breasts. I thought about the only time he’d been inside me and I
could remember the sound of them slapping against the wet flesh of
my pussy as he held me bent over and drove his meaty cock into me.
The throbbing between my legs was intense. My own thoughts had me
panting and wet. My thoughts were dirty and sexy and they flooded
my body with every sensation imaginable.

“
Make him love you,”
Ruthless Me,
whispered.
“Make it so he can’t live without you.”

“
I can’t,”
I whispered back.
“I
tried. He said my attempts are laughable. He doesn’t care.”

“
He will.”

“Uh…mmm…come on.” Caleb’s eyes were shut
tight; his beautiful mouth open and the sexiest sounds I’d heard in
my life were coming out of him. I wondered what he was thinking
about. I wondered if it could be me. Could I be the one driving him
toward this frenzied display of lust?

“
Yessssss,” Ruthless Me
shuddered
.

My nipples were tight and painful, scraping
against the suddenly rough fabric of my shirt. I wanted to take
them out. I wanted to touch them against something cool. I pressed
my body against the door, rubbing them against the hard wood as I
continued to watch Caleb in all of his masculine and somehow
vulnerable glory.

I leaned back and pressed the palm of my
hand against my mound rubbing in tiny circles I feared wouldn’t get
me where I wanted to go nearly quick enough. I didn’t want to get
lost in my pleasure. I wanted to watch Caleb. I wanted to see him
come. The thought made me press against my clit even harder, the
circles smaller, tighter and faster. I felt a flutter in my belly,
then a warm tingle spread from my spine out to all my limbs until
finally I felt my pussy clench tight, then release and clench
again. I let out a small cry before I sucked in my lips and bit
down on them to keep in any other sounds. It hardly sated me. It
was a sneeze compared to how Caleb made me come, but it was enough
to force my focus toward Caleb.

His hips were thrusting faster, the cheeks
of his ass flexing up and down as he put real effort into reaching
his climax. He leaned his body forward resting his forehead against
his forearm as he gritted his teeth and pumped that monstrous thing
he called a cock back and forth through his wet fist. Rivulets of
water fell from all over his gorgeous body and I was suddenly so
thirsty. I wanted to kneel at his feet and lick water off of him,
especially his impressive cock. I wanted to lick water off of it
and suck it.

I was thinking of all the things I wanted to
do when he let out a grunt, followed by a painful whine as ropes of
thick semen burst out of his dick and covered his large hand before
dripping down toward those heavy balls and eventually the shower
floor. It was a lot of come and yet his balls didn’t seem any
smaller.

Caleb was panting hard, his shoulders rising
and falling with the effort. His beautiful face was red with
exertion, but if possible, it made him look even more handsome. I
wanted to continue to admire him, but doing so felt like a betrayal
– of me. The facts were still the facts. He didn’t really care
about me. He was using me.

My passion was quickly cooling and finally,
I slowly shut the door and crept back into bed to nurse more than
my physical injuries.

Sometime later I heard the bathroom door
open and the soft scrape of Caleb’s feet against the carpet as he
made his way toward the bed. I felt the bed dip as he got between
the covers, making sure no part of him touched any part of me.

“I woke up and you weren’t here,” I
whispered, with my back toward him. I knew he tensed, but I can’t
say how, perhaps it was the air between us that was tense.

“Have you been up long?”

“No, just a few minutes.” I felt him relax
into the mattress.

“Another nightmare?”

“Yes,” I lied, but felt completely justified
as his warm chest, covered in soft cotton, met with my back and his
fingers, the ones covered in his semen only minutes before, traced
along my arm to soothe me. A vision of his powerful, sleek body
straining toward orgasm made its way into my mind’s eye. His
fingers were long, influential and still damp as they charted their
course along my flesh, leaving me tingling in their wake. I touched
his skin. “You’re wet.”

He sighed heavily, “I’m sorry Kitten. I
needed another shower.” His voice was low, dopey with fatigue, but
sincere nonetheless. One mention of the word shower and my throat
was dry thinking of all the water sluicing off his perfect body and
from that beautiful organ. I wondered what he would taste like.

“It’s okay.” I whispered. My throat was
hoarse.

“Anything I can do to make you feel better?”
All sorts of answers flitted around in my lust filled head. It was
tempting to fall back on reliable tactics and pretend things
were…perfect. To pretend he was only a boy and I was only a girl
and we desired each other. I wanted him to hold and kiss me and
pretend he would do anything to protect me. I wanted to pretend he
felt a fraction of the things I couldn’t seem to stop myself from
feeling for him.

My heart hurt. As much as my shoulder and
ribs screamed with pain, they were eclipsed by the sorrow in my
heart. I couldn’t pretend anymore. The time for it had passed;
there was only the reality of things left to deal with.

“Yes, Master,” I tried not to sob, “There’s
so much you can do to make me feel better.” His body pressed deeper
into mine and for a moment I just let him be close. “You could not
sell me… I could stay with you… be with you?” Caleb gripped me
tight, not because he wanted to hurt me, but because I’d shocked
the hell out of him. I’d shocked myself, too, but I’d been through
too much not to just tell shit the way it was. He swallowed
audibly, fingers tentative, as they loosened their hold.

“Kitten…” his forehead pressed hard against
the nape of my neck, “you ask for impossible things.” I wanted to
ask which parts were impossible, but I knew the answer. He couldn’t
let go of his revenge, but he could let go of
me
.