Sarasota Dreams (32 page)

“Yes, Mother. I’ll be right there. Let me put my bag and shoes away first.”

Shelley went to her room, hung her tote on the peg, took off her shoes, and put on some sandals as she mentally unwound from her day. Then she joined Mother in the kitchen.

“What can I do to help you?”

She was greeted with a smile. “Nothing. Have a seat, and I’ll join you. Want some tea?”

Shelley slowly nodded. “Ya, that would be very nice. Want me to fix it?”

“Neh, I have the tea in the pot, and I’m just waiting for the water to boil.” She carried a couple of cups to the table and set one in front of Shelley and placed one where she normally sat.

Shelley watched her mother move around the kitchen, light on her feet, as though she didn’t have a care—completely opposite from her behavior a month ago. Several things had helped, including her father’s shift change, William’s increased doting, and being nurtured by a small group of women from the church. They’d heard about her depression, so they’d made it their mission to check on her daily.

A few minutes later, Shelley and her mother sat adjacent to each other at the kitchen table, blowing on their tea in silence. It felt nice knowing that things were going well—at least for now.

“How was your day?” her mother finally asked.

“It was good. Normal. Nothing happened.”

Her mother smiled and lifted her cup to her lips, taking a sip. “Sounds peaceful.”

“How about you? Did you have a good day?”

“Ya. The women from church checked on me this morning, but they didn’t stay long.” Mother’s smile faded, and she sighed.

Shelley touched her mother’s arm. “Is something wrong?”

“I’m not sure. I’m grateful to have your father home nights, and William seems happy. Paul has been stopping by whenever he gets a chance, and he’s even offering to bring the children by more often.” Her mother licked her lips and slowly raised her gaze. “The only thing I have left to worry about is you, Shelley.”

“Me? Why are you worried about me?”

“I’m concerned about you and Jeremiah.”

Shelley leaned back and shook her head. “I haven’t seen much of Jeremiah lately. He’s been working very hard on the land he’s getting from Abe, so he doesn’t have much time for anything else.”

“I’ve heard he’s doing that so he can take a wife and have a family.”

“Maybe,” Shelley said slowly. “But that’s not my concern.”

Her mother tilted her head, raised her eyebrows, and fixed her focus on Shelley. “Are you sure it is not your concern?”

“Why would it be?”

“According to one of the women from church, Jeremiah has his sights set on making you his wife.”

“Something so serious requires more than Jeremiah’s sights.” Shelley tried to keep a light tone to her voice, but the impact of her mother’s words and concern hit her hard. “And I haven’t given it a thought.”

“I wondered about that. Sometimes you can be so secretive I don’t know what you’re thinking or even doing.”

“I would never do anything wrong, Mother. I thought you knew that about me.”

“You are a good girl, Shelley, but I know what it’s like to be a young woman. It might have been a long time ago, but sometimes the years between then and now seem so short.”

“You and Father have been together a long time,” Shelley observed.

“Ya, we have.” An uncommon look of contentment softened her mother’s features.

Shelley had never had a discussion about her parents’ relationship with her mother, but now seemed like a good time to start. “Were you always in love with Father, or did you ever doubt your feelings for him?”

“Never … Well, maybe when we were very young, and he teased me unmercifully—I thought he was a pest. But after we became adults, he made his intentions very obvious, and I was smitten.”

That sounded similar to how Jeremiah had been with Shelley, with the exception of when Jeremiah abandoned his faith. “Father was a pest?”

Her mother laughed out loud. “That is an understatement. He found ways to annoy me when we were in our early teens.” She pursed her lips and blushed.

“I’d love to hear about this.”

“For starters, he hid things and then asked me if I’d seen them. Once when we had a very big homework assignment, our teacher told us to put it on our desk before we went to lunch. When we came back, mine was gone. I panicked, but one look at your father let me know he was guilty.”

“I remember Jeremiah doing something like that to me,” Shelley blurted before thinking. The look on her mother’s face made her shrink back. “But I’m sure it was different.”

“Another thing your father did was jump out from behind things and frighten me.”

Shelley had never seen that playful, mischievous side of her father. All she’d ever known was the stern, serious man who came home every night for supper and ate in near silence.

“But when we became old enough to consider courting, he let me know he’d acted out because he didn’t know what else to do about his feelings for me.” Shelley’s mother smiled shyly. “And I admitted that I was flattered. After that, we knew we would eventually get married.” She paused and looked Shelley in the eye. “There was never any doubt that we both loved the Lord because neither of us ever walked away and left our faith behind.”

She got up and carried the teapot to the counter by the sink, ending the conversation. Shelley brought the two teacups and offered to do the dishes.

“I’ll take care of this, Shelley. You’ve worked so hard lately. Why don’t you go to your room and rest for a few minutes?”

As Shelley left the kitchen, she thought about her discussion with her mother. This had been one of the longest they’d had in a while, and she was grateful for the time. But it obviously was done for a purpose. A warning. Mother’s final comment about never leaving faith behind had been directed at Jeremiah.

She closed her bedroom door, kicked off her shoes, and lay down on the lightweight summer quilt her grandmother had made. As she stared up at the ceiling, her conversation with her mother played through her mind.

Shelley knew that her parents had married young—much younger than she was now at the age of twenty-five. Most of the Mennonite couples she knew did. Their children often waited a little longer, though, so Shelley wasn’t alone. The big difference between Shelley and some of the other single people her age was that she would have the responsibility of taking care of William for the rest of his life after her parents could no longer care for him, while the others could go into a marriage alone.

Jeremiah was the only man Shelley’s age who actively engaged William in conversation. William clearly liked Jeremiah, but Shelley could tell when he’d heard something negative from their parents because he would always add a disparaging comment after anything positive he’d said about Jeremiah.

After a half hour of rest, Shelley got up, repinned her hair, and adjusted her kapp. She went back to the kitchen, where her mother was still busy at the stove. Without a word, Shelley set the table for four, lingering a few extra seconds by her father’s place. She was grateful to have him home for meals, regardless of the fact that he rarely said more than a couple of words after the blessing.

“How is that new girl doing at the restaurant?” her mother asked, clearly trying to make small talk without making the conversation as personal as it had been.

Shelley played along. “Jocelyn? She seems fine, but she has a lot to learn.”

“I can imagine. I guess I don’t have to tell you how surprised everyone was that Joseph hired someone like her.”

Shelley had been surprised at the time, too, but now that she knew Jocelyn better, she saw the softer side of the girl who used makeup and multicolored spiked hair as a barrier. “She’s catching on very well, and the customers seem to like her.”

“I’m surprised. She rather frightens me.”

“Jocelyn isn’t frightening at all. She’s actually rather funny.” Shelley smiled at the thought of some of Jocelyn’s funny phrases.

Her mother looked at her with a lifted eyebrow and froze for a few seconds. “I hope you don’t go getting any ideas that it’s okay to dress or act like her.”

Shelley laughed. “Trust me, Mother, I have no desire to do either of those things. But beneath her exterior, she’s not as different from me as I thought at first.”

William arrived home from school at that moment, a grin playing on his lips, even though he looked like he was trying to hide it. Shelley smiled back at him, and he looked away then laughed.

“Okay, so what are you so happy about?” Shelley asked.

“I asked Myra to marry me, and she said yes.”

W
illiam’s joy quickly vanished as their mother shrieked, “William! No!”

He took a step back, his face scrunching up as it always did before he cried. Shelley stood there in stunned silence as her mother told him he’d never be able to marry a girl. A huge tear trickled down his cheek, and his chin quivered.

When Mother stopped her rant, William looked her in the eye. “But I love her.”

“You don’t understand love,” Mother replied.

He blinked and wiped a tear as it escaped. “I love you, too.”

Mother looked helplessly at Shelley, silently pleading for help, but Shelley had no idea what to say. She understood her mother’s concern, but she disagreed with her about William understanding love. He knew better than anyone how to love a person, but she was aware that didn’t erase the complications of his proposal.

Shelley took a deep breath to steady her nerves and her voice before addressing her brother. “William, where do you know Myra?”

“She works with me at the shop.”

“That settles it,” their mother said. “You are not going back to that place. I told your father it wasn’t a good idea for you to work.”

“I want to keep working,” William argued. “I like having my own money.”

Shelley nodded. “I understand that, William.” She glanced over at their mother. “Perhaps we can discuss this more, after Father gets home.”

As Mother lifted her hand to her forehead, a sense of dread flooded Shelley. That simple gesture was generally followed by a quick drop into depression that could last for weeks. In the past, it seemed to be triggered by their father’s switch to late shifts, but this was something new.

“William, you are awfully young to be thinking about getting married. How old is Myra?” Shelley asked.

He puffed up his chest and smiled. “Myra is eighteen years old.” His grin widened. “And she’s pretty. I like her red hair.”

“I’m sure she’s very pretty, but you haven’t been working there very long. Getting married is very serious.”

“I know that,” William said. “I’m serious, too.”

“Do you know anything about her family?”

“She lives in a group home.”

“Does she have a family?”

He thought for a few seconds and then nodded. “I think her mother lives in Tampa. I don’t know where her father lives.”

Shelley and her mother exchanged a glance before Shelley turned back to William. “Maybe we can meet Myra sometime. Why don’t I get someone to drive me to pick you up from work on Monday?”

“I like riding the van,” he argued. “Myra rides with me, and we hold hands. We drop her off at her house first.”

Shelley took a step back, placed her hands on her hips, and gave him what she hoped was an authoritative look. “Well, before you make the decision to marry Myra, we need to meet her and her family. I’m sure they feel they same way.” She glanced at her mother, who stood off to the side looking aghast but remaining silent.

“Why?” he asked.

“That’s just the way it’s done. When you marry a girl, not only are you getting a wife, but you’re also taking on her whole family.”

“How about her? Does she get a whole new family, too?”

“Yes, William, it works both ways.”

“That is very good. Myra says she wants a family just like mine, and now she’ll have one.”

Shelley hoped her talk hadn’t backfired, but she couldn’t worry about it. What she’d said was true, and now she needed to pray about it.

“Go wash up, William. Supper will be ready as soon as Father comes home.”

As soon as he was out of the kitchen, Shelley’s mother sank down in a chair. “What are we going to do?”

“We are going to pray, Mother. That’s all we can do. Besides, William can’t get married anyway because he’s too young.”

“You seem to be forgetting one very important thing, Shelley. William will never be able to get married.”

Shelley wasn’t so sure her mother was right, but even if she was, she was fretting over something unnecessarily. “I’ll talk to William about all the things involved in getting married. Maybe he’ll realize it’s not as easy as he seems to think it is.”

“I don’t think he’ll understand,” Mother argued.

William understood quite a bit more than most people gave him credit for, and Shelley had been amazed at how much he comprehended. “Just let me talk to him before you worry any more. By the time I finish with him, I doubt he’ll want to pursue this whole thing.”

“Why?” Mother asked, her expression changing to confusion. “What do you plan to say to him?”

“I’m not sure yet. I’ll need to think about it.”

“Don’t make him think marriage is a bad thing, just because you do.”

Shelley was stunned. “I don’t think marriage is bad. I think it’s wonderful.”

“If you think marriage is good, why aren’t you trying harder to find a husband?”

Shelley’s mouth went dry. Couldn’t her mother see the truth—that getting married was extremely difficult for Shelley based on how much she was needed at home? She started to talk, but her voice caught in her throat. Good thing, too, because if she’d said what was on her mind, there was no telling how her mother would react.

“If your talk with William doesn’t work, we have a mess on our hands. It’s bad enough my oldest child married an outsider and left the church. To have my baby do that, too, and in his condition …” Her chin quivered just as William’s had.

“Tammy is a very sweet woman,” Shelley said. “They’re going to church.”

“But they’re not going to
our
church, which was my dream. I always thought my children would grow up, get married, and attend the church you grew up in. That way we can always be together as a family, and I’d get to see my grandchildren.”