Sarah's Surrender (4 page)

“Eat!” Matty nodded his white-blond head.

“This boy does like his food.” Jo smiled as she patted her son's backside.

Sarah walked alongside her dear friend as they headed home. “It amazes me how much this town has grown since you first came here.”

“I remember when it was virgin prairie with no buildings. It's hard to believe all the changes that have taken place in just eight years.”

At the top of the depot steps, Sarah paused a moment to study the town. It consisted mainly of two-story buildings constructed of wood, brick, or stone. Buggies and horses with riders moved down every street. As she descended the stairs, her gaze shifted toward the part of Perry dubbed Hell's Half Acre, where a host of saloons and gambling houses existed. She was thankful that Baron and Jo lived on the opposite side of town. The seedier section reminded her too much of her father's former business. She glanced up at the sky, thanking God again for protecting her and getting her out of that dreadful situation.

Emma chatted up a storm as they walked. She smiled down at the darling.

“Clarence is assisting Baron at the store so I don't have to worry about going in today. I don't work nearly as much as I used to since the children keep me busy.”

“That's wonderful. I'm happy to watch the children, though, if you need to work while I'm here.”

“How long can you stay?” Jo glanced sideways at Sarah.

“Only a few days.” She thought of all she had to do, most importantly getting to El Reno in time to register for the lottery.

Jo stopped and turned to face her. “Why such a short visit?”

“Let's get to the house. Then I'll explain. I'd prefer not to do it on the street.”

Jo nodded, but it was obvious that she was curious. At the next corner, Jo turned left instead of right, which would have taken them down the street where Hillborne's Mercantile was located. Sarah thought back to the days when Jo and Baron had married. Shortly after that he'd ridden in the 1893 land run, often called the Cherokee Strip Land Run, and won a plot where they'd built their store. Later they bought a lot from a man who was returning to Arkansas and built a lovely home there. Each time she visited, Sarah had to fight back her feelings of jealousy. The two-story house with bay windows and a wide wraparound porch was just what she longed for. Would she ever have a home of her own?

It wasn't that she was ungrateful to live with Gabe and Lara in their big house, but she was ready to move on.

They rounded another corner, and Sarah's gaze landed on Jo's home. The lovely house was painted a soft yellow with white trim around the doors, windows, and porch railings. She exhaled a sigh, happy for her friend but unable to curtail the longing deep within her.

The noise of the business area softened as they moved into the residential part of town. Birds serenaded them from the trees that offered abundant shade overhead, and down the street a dog barked.

Someone who didn't know the history of the town would find it hard to believe that less than a decade ago this had all been virgin prairie. She, of all people, knew how fast change could come. One day she was tending her dying mother, and then the next, her father—whom she only remembered seeing a few times—showed up and took her home with him. Less than two years later, she ran away from him at the same time Jo did. It was the best choice she'd ever made.

They walked through the front door into the cool house, and Jo set Matty down. He toddled into the parlor where he plopped down next to a basket of blocks. Jo pressed her knuckles into the small of her back. “That boy is getting heavy.”

Emma pulled her hand free from Sarah's and went to play with her brother. Sarah smiled, watching the two precious children. Jo tugged the satchel from her hand and set it on the bottom step of the staircase. “Let's have teatime while the children are occupied with their toys. I'm dying to hear your news.”

“Where's Jamie?”

“He's playing with a neighbor boy. Mrs. Carpenter offered to watch him while I met your train.” Jo lifted her brow. “So, tell me your news.”

“Who said I had any?”

Jo smiled, her blues eyes twinkling. “I know you, remember? It's not your normal month to visit, and you wouldn't travel all this way unless you had a good reason.”

“Can't I visit whenever I want?” Sarah tossed her a teasing look.

“Of course. You know you're welcome to move in with us, if you ever decide you want to.” Jo wrapped her in a warm embrace. “I've missed you.”

“Me, too.” She swallowed the lump in her throat. Once she moved away, she would see Jo and her family much less.

Turning her stinging eyes away, lest Jo noticed, Sarah gazed around the pretty kitchen, gathering ideas for what she'd like for her future home. Jo's cabinets had been painted a fresh white and had round knobs. She had a small table in the kitchen but also a larger one in the adjacent dining room. For Sarah, a medium-sized kitchen with a table would be sufficient.

Jo set a pot of water on to boil then dropped onto a chair. “Before I check on the children, tell me why you're being so secretive.”

“I'm not. I just didn't want to talk about things on the street.”

“What things?” Jo sucked in a gasp and laid her hand on Sarah's arm. “Are you getting married?”

Sarah laughed. “I did receive a proposal, but I said no.”

“You did? From who?”

“Luke.”

Jo smacked the table with her palm. “I knew he was sweet on you.”

Sarah looked away. “How come you never mentioned it?”

“I have! I told you several times that he was attracted to you, but you always laughed it off. Why in the world did you turn him down? He's a kind, honorable man. I know you've been attracted to him for years.” She sat back and shook her head. “Luke must have been devastated.”

“I hated hurting him, but you know how much I've longed for a home of my own. Luke is a good man, and I do care for him, but he lives in the bunkhouse.”

“So? I'm sure he has money set back that he could use to get his own place. He's worked for Gabe for over ten years, and since he doesn't gamble, I'd suspect he has a goodly amount saved.”

“He said as much, but I don't love him. At least I don't think I do.”

Jo lifted her index finger. “Hold that thought for a moment. Let me check on the young'uns.” She hurried from the room.

Sarah closed her eyes and blew out a breath. Telling Jo about Luke had been the easy part. Now she had to tell her she was moving.

A
knock sounded on the bedroom door. “Sarah, it's me.”

“Come in.” Sarah scooted over to allow Jo room to sit on the bed beside her and then continued running the brush through her hair.

Jo closed the door behind her. “Mind if I sit?”

“Of course not.”

Jo plopped down onto the bed. “This reminds me of the days when we ran away from your father's place and first stayed at Lara's.”

“Yes, it does.” Sarah smiled at the memory. She'd been a frightened twelve-year-old. When Jo gave her the chance to leave the bordello with her, she'd grasped it and left right then. She'd never felt comfortable in her father's big house, especially since he made her stay away from the women who lived there and had locked her in her room when the men came visiting each evening. She'd been lonely and missing her mother when Jo gave her the opportunity she'd longed for.

“Why are you so quiet?”

Sarah shrugged and sent her friend a smile. “Just remembering those days.”

“I'm sorry our talk earlier got interrupted by the children. And then Jamie was so excited to see you when he returned home. After that, Baron came home and I had to get supper on the table.”

Sarah smiled. “I understand. Your life is a busy one. I can hardly believe you have three children.”

“There are moments I long for the quiet of when I just had Jamie, but I wouldn't trade my life for anyone's.”

“I'm glad you and Baron are happy. Who would have ever dreamed you'd end up marrying Mark's brother?” Sarah remembered the awful tales Jo had told her of how Baron's younger brother had deceived and beaten her, leaving Jo pregnant and alone. But God had restored the days the locust had destroyed and given her a godly husband who dearly loved her.

Jo laughed. “I'd have been the last to believe it, but I'm so glad I did. Baron's a good man.”

Sarah thought about Luke. Had she made a terrible mistake in turning down his proposal? Would she look back one day and be sorry?

“You're thinking about Luke, aren't you?”

Sarah glanced up. “How did you know?”

Jo's eyes gleamed. “Because your mouth tilts up in a special smile when you're looking at him—the same one you had just now.”

“I didn't realize anyone had noticed my feelings for him.”

“So you do love him.” Jo squeezed Sarah's arm. “I can tell you from experience that finding a good man who loves God
and
you is far more important than getting a house. There's something special between a man and woman who love one another deeply.”

“I can't deny that I have an attraction to Luke, but I don't know if I love him enough to marry him.”

“Well, it's certainly important to be sure.”

Sarah nodded and laid her brush on the table beside the bed. She turned to face her dear friend. “That's really not the thing I needed to talk about.”

“Oh?”

“No.” She swallowed back her nervousness and squeezed her hands together. “I've decided to leave the ranch.”

Jo's blue eyes widened. “Leave?” She reached for Sarah's hand. “Are you finally moving in with us?”

“No, it's not that.” Excitement drove away her anxiety. “The government is opening more Indian lands, and I'm going to El Reno to register for the lottery.”

“How exciting!” Jo clapped her hands then sobered. “But you can't go alone. It wouldn't be safe.”

“Jack mentioned he had been thinking about going, too.”

Jo leaned back against the bed's footboard. “Wow! I sure didn't expect that. What will you do if you don't get land?”

Sarah pursed her lips and lifted one shoulder. “Lara said I will always have a home with them, but I feel it's time for me to leave. I can't stay there forever.”

“Come here. There's no reason for you to go clear on the other side of Oklahoma City.”

“Thank you, but I have this craving to have my own place. I never have, you know.”

Jo patted Sarah's hand. “Of course I understand. I felt the same way in the past. You could always purchase a home here in Perry. We could be neighbors.”

“I would like that, but I feel pulled in a different direction.”

“Have you prayed about this lottery thing?”

Sarah nodded. “Over and over and over. I can't help but believe this is what God is calling me to do. I know it doesn't make a lot of sense for a single woman to homestead on her own, but if God is calling me to do it, I have to trust that He'll help me and take care of me.”

“You're so much more mature than I was at your age.”

Sarah blinked. “I am?”

“Yes, and I'm proud of you. Is there any way that Baron and I can help?”

“There are many things that I'll need to purchase to set up my own place. I was hoping I could buy some supplies from y'all and maybe get a discount.” She flashed Jo a toothy smile, hoping her friend would see she was half teasing but also half serious.”

Jo squeezed Sarah's forearm. “That's the least we can do. Have you made a list?”

“A very long one.”

“Good. Let me see it in the morning. Having set up a home from scratch—twice—I know pretty much everything you'll need, so I'll check your list and see what all you left off. We don't want you to get down there and end up not having something important.”

“That's so generous of you.”

“It's the least I can do for my little sister. We'll go to the store tomorrow and see if we have the things on your list in stock, and if not, I'll order them. That way if you do win land, they will be here, and I can get them ready and shipped quickly.”

“That sounds perfect. Thank you.”

“Anything for my little sister.” Jo stood and gave Sarah a hug. “Make sure you have a gun. I know Luke taught you how to use one.”

“He did, and I have to admit that I'm a fair shot.”

“Good. I hope you never have to use a gun, but you need one just in case. Life in a brand-new town can be rough.” Jo opened the door then turned back and waved. “See you in the morning. I'm excited for you.”

Sarah reclined against the headboard. That had gone better than she expected. But then she knew Jo would be understanding and encouraging.

If only she didn't have doubts. Was she truly doing the right thing?