Santa Baby (18 page)

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Authors: Katie Price

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‘I’ll give her some credit, she did find me some jeans that fitted and were flattering, and didn’t give me a whacking great muffin top,’ Jayne admitted. ‘But the black tunic? I like wearing black but she might as well have put me in a bin bag! I want something special. It’s my wedding anniversary at the end of the month and we’re going on a mini-break. I’d love to wear something to make my husband go “Wow”.’ She sighed. ‘My mum died two years ago and I felt so down I didn’t care about my appearance. Our marriage went through a rough
patch
… But I want to put all that behind me, for the sake of my family.’

Tiffany got up from her chair and hugged Jayne. ‘I understand. I promise, I want you to look and feel sensational.’

Jayne smiled. ‘I can already tell that you’re a whole lot nicer than Claudia. Much prettier too. She looked as if she had a poker stuck up her arse! Thought she was far too good for the likes of me.’

‘She thought she was too good for the likes of anyone!’ Tiffany replied, and then got down to work.

She flicked through the rack of clothes, weighing up each garment. The stand-out item for her was a halterneck dress, with a fitted waist and full skirt, in a beautiful shade of coral. The halterneck would show off a hint of cleavage, the fitted cut would emphasis Jayne’s waist and skim over the problem tummy and the full skirt would hang below her knees, so covering up any thigh issues. The warm colour would flatter her pale skin.

Tiffany held up the dress. ‘Cinderella, you are going to the ball!’

‘Isn’t the colour a bit too bright? I don’t want to look like mutton. And what about my bingo wings?’ Jayne waved them above her head. ‘They have to be covered up! I don’t want to scare people.’

Damn, this was going to be harder than Tiffany had realised.

‘Jayne, black is
so
boring. This coral will make you glow. If you’re worried about your arms, you can put on a sheer gold wrap.’ She saved the best bit till last as she held up a pair of gorgeous gold strappy sandals. ‘And these shoes will set it all off perfectly and show off your very pretty feet.’

The shoes seemed to weaken Jayne’s resolve slightly. ‘I suppose I could at least try it on …’

‘When your hair and make-up is finished. I want you to get the full effect.’

Twenty minutes later, Jayne’s hair and make-up were done to perfection and Tiffany was able to persuade her to try on the dress. As she had predicted the design flattered Jayne’s hour-glass figure. She watched Jayne considering her reflection in the mirror, then carefully placed the sheer gold wrap around her shoulders. ‘Personally I don’t think you need it, but if you feel insecure about your arms, it’s there.’

‘I love it!’ Jayne declared, looking bowled over by the sight of her new self. ‘I absolutely love it!’

In fact everyone loved it, including Angel, who, after she’d seen Jayne, hugged Tiffany and said, ‘You did good. Now get yourself into my dressing room, it’s time for
your
makeover.’

Tiffany had been so caught up in getting Jayne ready, she had almost forgotten that she herself was going to be on TV. Instantly her stomach lurched with nerves. She clutched Angel’s arm. ‘Can we talk about what I’m going to say?’

‘Of course. We’ve still got an hour.’

Forty minutes later Tiffany and Angel had run through the kinds of things she needed to say – both of them wanted to steer clear of saying anything about Tanya. Jez had trimmed Tiffany’s fringe and made her usually sleek brunette hair look even sleeker. Darcy had emphasised her green eyes with shades of gold and bronze, and given her ruby-red lips. She had changed from her skinny jeans into a cute black-and-pink rose-patterned dress from Topshop, teamed with black shoe boots and bare legs.

‘You look divine,’ Jez declared. ‘Love the look … kind of Daisy Lowe rock chick … and it’s great that it’s all high street and affordable for our viewers. Madam Claudia only ever wore designer.’

‘D’you think so? Say I get all sweaty? I don’t want to be on
Harry Hill’s TV Burp
with Sweatiest Armpits of the week!’

Jez put his hands on his hips. ‘Now come on, young lady. This is your big break. Would you really rather be back serving pizzas? Or saying “Have a nice day” to gym bunnies? You go out there and shine, shine, shine! And if you can’t do it for yourself, do it for Jayne next-door who’s a mass of nerves but is doing it anyway – and has already stripped off to her underwear for the TV cameras.’

Then he took pity on Tiffany and came over and gave her a hug. God! All this hugging and emotion, it was exhausting.

‘You’ll be great, I promise. I have a feeling you’ll be a natural in front of the cameras.’

‘How come you’re so good at analysing everyone?’ Tiffany asked, marvelling at the way he seemed so certain about
everything
.

Jez sighed theatrically. ‘Years and years and years of listening to my clients. I’m part hairdresser, part psychologist, part confessor.’

‘And don’t forget part drama queen,’ Angel quipped as she walked into the room. She smiled at Tiffany. ‘Ready? It’s time to go.’

Tiffany sat on the comfortable blue sofa next to Angel, barely able to bring herself to look out at the array of TV cameras zoomed in on the set. The studio lights were fiercely hot. At this rate she would find herself on
Harry Hill’s TV Burp
as person with the shiniest face of the week.

Jessica, a bubbly blonde – Tiffany supposed you couldn’t be a miserable and sarcastic day-time TV presenter – and Matthew, middle-aged, conventionally and unthreateningly handsome, were both very
welcoming.
But Tiffany felt like a rabbit caught in the headlights, knowing that any second now she would be on live TV. Angel reached out and squeezed her hand. ‘Don’t worry. Just enjoy it. We’ll go out and have lunch afterwards.’

Tiffany had been far too nervous to have any breakfast. Her mouth felt dry and she reached for the glass of water, aware that her hand was shaking. Was it too late to say that she’d changed her mind?

But then the adverts finished and the show’s bright and breezy sig tune cut in, and Jessica and Matthew were beaming their perfect white smiles at the camera as they introduced Angel’s Makeover.

‘And it’s a special one today, isn’t it, Angel, as you’ve been joined by a certain someone?’ More smiles from Jessica, flashing her whiter than white teeth.

‘It is. I’d like to introduce my sister Tiffany who has helped with today’s styling. And as the press has already reported, our big news is that we’ve just discovered we are in fact sisters.’

Cue intrigued but sympathetic looks from Jessica and Matthew.

‘It’s an incredible story, isn’t it?’ Jessica gushed.

‘So, Tiffany, how did you feel when you found out that you were Angel’s sister?’ That from Matthew, along with a concerned, sympathetic, you-can-tell-me-everything look.

Oh, God! Now she had to speak. ‘Um … of course, it was a bit of a shock.’ Tiffany was aware how wobbly her voice sounded. ‘I had no idea I even had a sister, let alone a celebrity one.’

Angel helped her out. ‘But once we met – even though we didn’t know for certain we were sisters because we hadn’t had the DNA test – we really hit it off. We even discovered we were wearing the same perfume, Coco Mademoiselle.’ She smiled at Tiffany.
‘It’s
great discovering that I have a sister.’

‘Well, we’ll be talking more about your bombshell news after your makeover slot. So who’s had the treatment today?’

And now Tiffany started to relax as Angel talked about Jayne and introduced the film clips. She knew what she wanted to say. And when Jessica asked her about the style choices that had been made for Jayne, Tiffany was able to give an eloquent answer about why certain garments had been chosen and how important it was to boost Jayne’s self-esteem and find the clothes that suited her lifestyle. She realised that she could do this. And, more to the point, she was enjoying herself.

The highlight had to be when Jayne came on wearing the coral dress and looking gorgeous. And what thrilled Tiffany more than anything was that not only did the dress look great but Jayne was obviously delighted with her appearance and loving the reaction from the audience, who were cheering and clapping her as she made her grand entrance.

‘Jez was right, you are a natural in front of the camera!’ Angel told her as they walked off the set together. ‘I can’t believe it was the first time you’ve ever done that. It took me ages to stop being wooden, even after a load of media training. And I still think there’s room for improvement.’

Tiffany was pretty sure that Angel was simply being nice, but it was good to know that she had not disgraced herself or let her sister down. But it turned out everyone on the show was delighted with her too.

‘You rock, Tiff!’ Jez declared when she and Angel walked into the dressing room. ‘Is it OK if I call you Tiff?’

‘Everyone does except my dad.’ And Sean, but she didn’t mention his name.

There was a quick debrief about the following day’s filming and then they were free to go for lunch. As Tiffany walked out of the production meeting, she bumped into Sean and felt a whoosh of butterflies inside her as his arm brushed against hers.

For a second Sean looked as surprised to see her as she was to see him, but he quickly composed himself. ‘Congratulations, I thought you did really well.’

Angel overheard him and draped her arm round Tiffany’s shoulders, ‘She was fab, wasn’t she? Can you drop us off at Locatelli’s? We’re going to have a celebration lunch. You’re welcome to join us.’

‘Thank you but I have some calls to make, so it’s best if I don’t.’

Tiffany felt a mix of relief and disappointment. Sean walked ahead of the three of them to the car and she soon discovered that Jez shared her disappointment,

‘Sean Murphy, the enigma continues … I just can’t figure him out at all! It’s doing my head in. He’s so damned inscrutable. Why will he never come out for lunch with us?’ he whispered.

‘Perhaps he doesn’t like you,’ Angel teased him.

‘Or maybe he wouldn’t be able to control himself if he spent too long in my company,’ Jez pouted.

Angel winked at Tiffany. ‘Your gaydar’s off. Sean is straight. But maybe he’d make an exception for you, Jez.’

‘What do you think of him, Tiff?’ he demanded. ‘Isn’t he divinely hot?’

Tiffany had been trying to suppress all thoughts of Sean, not entirely successfully. She had dreamed of him the night before – a passionate, erotic dream that made her long for him even while she was furious with him for rejecting her.

She shrugged, ‘He’s OK, if you like that kind of thing. I get the feeling there’s not much to him beyond his looks.’

‘But what looks they are!’ Jez enthused.

And then an image of Sean lying beside her on the sofa, dressed only in a vest and boxers, flashed through Tiffany’s mind. ‘Hmm,’ she muttered, and was relieved when they reached the car.

Jez sat in the front of the Merc. Tiffany was directly behind Sean, which meant she inadvertently kept catching his eye in the rear-view mirror, every time she looked over at Jez.

‘So, Miss Taylor, what else do I need to know about you?’ he demanded. ‘Are you gay, straight, bisexual, single, attached?’

‘He doesn’t beat about the bush, does he?’ Tiffany complained to Angel, very aware that Sean was listening. How could he not be?

‘Come on! Give me the bare bones now, then I can have all the juicy details over lunch.’

Tiffany rolled her eyes. ‘I’m straight and single. There – are you satisfied?’ She was looking across at Jez but her eyes strayed to the mirror to see Sean looking at her.

‘Happy being single or on the lookout?’

‘Very happy being single.’ She had better nip Jez’s questions in the bud. It was mortifying having to answer in front of Sean I’m-just-not-that-into-you Murphy.

Jez sighed. ‘I don’t know if anyone is
happy
being single.’ An idea seemed to occur to him and he suddenly exclaimed, ‘Angel, you’ll have to set Tiff up with some hot young thing. It’s your thirtieth birthday party at the end of July. That’ll be the perfect event for finding someone for her.’

‘Thanks for reminding me I’m thirty, Jez!’ Angel scolded. ‘I won’t remind you of the hissy fit you threw when you hit the big three oh.’

‘But, darling, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m only twenty-nine.’

‘For the last four years,’ Angel joked.

‘Delusional!’ Jez looked back at them, then added, ‘You’re thirty and fab-u-lous. Anyway thirty is the new twenty, and forty is the new thirty.’

‘And I don’t need anyone to set me up, thanks, Jez,’ Tiffany put in. ‘Like I said, I’m perfectly happy being single.’

‘Bet you change your mind when you see some of the hotties Cal knows,’ Jez challenged her.

Tiffany looked at Angel and raised her eyebrows. ‘Does he never give up?’

‘Never,’ Angel replied.

And then Jez directed his attention to Sean. ‘So have you got a girlfriend, Sean?’

Tiffany pretended to be fascinated by the view out of the window, but she was hanging on every word.

‘No.’

‘Happy being single?’ Jez persisted. ‘Or on the lookout?’

He really didn’t give up. And Tiffany couldn’t resist looking in the mirror once more where Sean stared back at her for a moment, his expression impossible to read, before he replied, ‘I’m happy, thanks.’

And Tiffany felt like saying,
Yeah, Sean, we all get the message, don’t worry
.

Jez folded his arms. ‘What happened to romance? Passion? Happy being single? Pah! So boring.’

He turned back to Tiffany. ‘I’m pinning my hopes on you, Tiff. You’re going to meet someone gorgeous at Angel’s party, I know it.’

‘So now you’re a clairvoyant as well as a hairdresser, psychologist, confessor and drama queen?’ Tiffany teased him.

‘I just know that you will meet someone,’ he
persisted.
‘I’ve got very good antennae for these things. In fact, I’m going to go through the guest list with Angel and make sure you’re sitting next to someone truly scrumptious.’

Tiffany remembered once more how humiliating it was when Sean had told her he wasn’t interested. Instead of telling Jez not to bother, she replied, ‘OK, but only if they’re truly scrumptious.’

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