Ruin Me (15 page)

“Yes, ma’am.”

“And your mother?” she continues. “How is she?”

I grow tense and I see Kai’s shoulders do the same. His mother. The other woman. Her former best friend. His eyes touch mine for a moment before he glances back at her. “She’s all right, I think,” he answers. “She hasn’t really taken the idea of me leaving home all that well. I caught her in my room last week putting my laundry away, which was strange because I don’t think I’ve ever seen her do laundry before in my life.”

My mother laughs at the thought. “Well, she’s going to miss you,” she says. “I can relate to not being able to see your only child whenever you want to.”

Kai nods at me. “I guess you can.”

She smiles warmly at him before shifting her attentions back to me. “I certainly can,” she says softly. Her hand touches mine and I feel her warm touch flow through her fingers onto my skin. It brings a heavy smile to my face. It’s so strange how much I’ve forgotten my mother’s comfort and how quickly it’s all coming back to me now.

“I can tell her you send your regards,” Kai says. “If you want.”

She chews on her lip. “That won’t be necessary,” she smiles with a hint of lingering malice behind her eyes.

Kai smiles in understanding before digging into his cake.

***

“So, he followed you here…” My mother passes a freshly washed dish to me and I give it a quick wipe with a cloth before stacking it in the drying rack.

I glance over my shoulder with discretion. Kai sits at the kitchen table with his phone in his palm. “He did,” I say quietly.

Her hands fish inside the water for silverware at the bottom of the sink. “And he had no idea I was here?” she asks.

“I don’t think so,” I shake my head. She shoots me an amused stare before her eyes flick back down to the water below. “What?” I ask.

“I always wondered when the two of you would finally notice each other,” she says.

“It’s not like that, Mom.” I scrub a glass a bit too dry.

“Well…” She looks over her shoulder and back again. “Look again, sweetie.” I shake my head and wipe down the fork she hands me, fighting the urge to glance at him again. She drains the sink and dries her hand on another towel before turning around. “Kai—”

I wipe down the last of the silverware and turn around as he looks up. “Yes, ma’am?” he asks.

“I’m going to have to insist you stay here tonight,” she says. I want so badly to intervene, but I know it won’t change a damn thing. “This storm isn’t going anywhere and I don’t want you walking back on your own.”

Kai stands up from the table and slips his phone into his pocket. “Uh…” he breathes. “Are you sure?”

She walks across the kitchen to him. “Of course, I am, Kai.
You
have always had a place in my home.” She pushes herself onto her toes and plants a quick, motherly kiss on his cheek. “No arguments. You can take the couch and Piper will share with me.”

He grins at her. “All right, Penny.”

Her hand lingers on his chin. He looks at her with confusion as she admires his face. “Oh — this
jaw
.” She shakes her head as she drops her hand. “Don’t you dare stop growing up.”

He laughs with red cheeks. “I will do my best.”

She looks back at me. “It’s late and I am very tired. I’ve forgotten how utterly
exhausting
you are, Piper.”

I step across the room, driven by the sudden devastation of her leaving me again, even if it is just down the hall. “Goodnight, Mom,” I whisper as I throw my arms around her.

She returns my hug and kisses the top of my head. “Don’t stay up too late. There’s much to be done tomorrow,” she says.

I nod as I pull away. She pats Kai’s shoulder one last time before leaving the room.

“Goodnight, Penny,” he calls after her.

“Goodnight, Mr. Casablancas.”

He smirks and watches her walk away before his eyes drift back to mine. He stares at me for a moment, his smile falling with each passing second. “Piper, I am so sorry,” he whispers. “If I had known it was her—”

“It’s fine,” I interrupt. “I’m… not mad.” I return to my seat at the table and he sits back down on his. It’s the truth, as strange as it is to admit. When my mother first answered the door, I was furious at him, but now… “I forgot how much she liked you.”

“So did I,” he chuckles. “I never realized how much I missed her being around.”

“I did.” I draw a line on the table with my fingernail. “I really did.”

He looks at me with sincere eyes. “You knew she was here this whole time?” he asks.

I nod. “Yeah,” I say. “She’s been traveling around the world for the last two years. And she’s serious about that postcard thing. I have a whole box full of them.”

He smiles and looks around the apartment. “And she lives here?” he asks.

“She’s got little hideouts all over Europe. A few in Asia, too,” I tell him.

“Wow…” he breathes. “Why didn’t you ever mention it?”

I shrug my shoulders. “Never seemed relevant.”

Kai furrows his brow. “Pipes, come on. Your mom was like an aunt to me.”

“Sorry…” I say. “My dad always got so mad when I mentioned her. I just kept my mouth shut after a while.”

He nods. A bit of thunder rolls outside and I listen for the rain tapping against the windows. “She hasn’t changed a bit,” he notes.

I smile. “No, she hasn’t.”

“I’m happy I got a chance to see her before we go home tomorrow.”

I pause, the words dancing on the tip of my tongue. It was never my intention to tell him, but he’s already come this far. If I don’t tell him now, then he’ll just find out in a few hours anyway. “I’m not going home, Kai,” I whisper.

“What do you mean? Of course, you’re going home…” His voice softens with each syllable.

“No, Kai…” I stare at the table between us. “I’m not.” He watches me with confusion, no doubt waiting for me to explain more to him. “You crashed a one-way trip.”

“Piper…” He gives a light chuckle. “You’re Piper
fucking
Lynch. You’re going to take over the world. You’re going to Harvard—”

“No, my dad
thinks
I’m going to Harvard.”

“Then where are you going to school?” he asks, still not getting it.

“I’m not.”

“What are you talking about? Of course, you’re going to school—”

“There’s nothing a lecture hall can teach me that I can’t learn out here.”

He shakes his head. “But you’re
enrolled
in classes. You start in like two days.”

I hesitate. “I never even applied, Kai…”

He sits back in his chair, his brow furrowing a little more. “Your Harvard acceptance letter has been plastered to our refrigerator since March,” he says.

I run my fingers along my lips, the tips of my nails grazing my teeth. “It’s impressive what one can do with a decent word processor and some fancy stationary.” I pull my fingers down, fighting the nervous urge to bite my nails.

“Pipes…”

I look up at his face and his handsome, tortured eyes. “I’ve lived my entire life in my father’s shoe box… and I’m not going back there.”

“That’s
ridiculous
.”

“I don’t expect you to understand, Kai.”

“You’re damn right I don’t understand. You
have
to come home, Piper,” he argues. “You don’t belong here — You can’t afford to live like this.”

“My trust fund unlocked when I turned eighteen,” I tell him. “I can do whatever I want.”

“Oh, and that trust fund doesn’t say
anything
about
not
using that money to wander around the world like a bum?”

I lean in and keep my voice down. “My
father’s
trust fund for me is
very
specific on how I’m to spend the money. My
mother’s
fund for me, on the other hand, has no such restrictions.”

“So that’s it, then?” he asks with a stiff shoulder shrug. “You’re just gone? You’re not coming home?”

“That was never my home in the first place, Kai. I’m staying here with my mother.
She’s
my home.” My throat hurts from finally saying it all out loud. The pain radiates through my chest as I watch him beg.

“What about all the people that care about you?” he whispers.

“No one cares about me.”

“That’s…” His lips shake. “That’s
really
not true, Pipes…”

“I’m sorry, Kai…” I swallow in a futile attempt at forcing my tears down. “I’m not going back with you.”

Everything he’s feeling flashes at me behind his eyes. I watch him go from blistering sadness, to righteous anger, and back again. “I don’t know anything about who you really are, do I?” he asks.

“You officially know more than about ninety-eight percent of the people in my life.”

He hangs forward and rests his palms against his head. I keep quiet, knowing that he’ll need time to process this. I wish that he never followed me to Europe in the first place. This would have been so much easier if he never kissed me on that train. I wish I could just go back to a week ago when I was so sure I hated him. Then I wouldn’t feel like this—

“No.” His voice finally breaks the silence. “This is bullshit.”

“Kai—”

“No, Piper. This isn’t right. Think about what this is going to do to your father,” he pleads.

“I have.”

“And what? You just don’t care?”

“No, I
do
care. And that’s what makes me different than him.”

He shoots back in his chair to sit upright. I flinch. “Is that what this is about? Him and my mother?” I look away as a fit of anger swells within me. “People cheat, Piper. People get divorced. It didn’t have anything to do with us. You don’t have to be so bitter about it.”

“I’m not bitter—”

“She said
bitterly
with a
bitter
expression—”

“Okay, you know what?” I interrupt. “Fine. I
am
bitter. My father destroyed our family and humiliated my mother in court because
your
mother’s tits were just
a little bit larger
. Sorry if that makes me feel
a little bitter
.”

He stares at me. “So what?”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. So fucking what?” he asks. “You really want to get back at him, then you should bleed him dry from the inside out. Tap his resources. Don’t just disappear like some damn teenage runaway.”

“I don’t want to
tap his resources.”
It’s exhausting to defend my decisions, but that won’t stop me from trying. “I don’t want anything from him. He got his eighteen years to play tyrant and I’m done. I’m out. Goodbye. It’s over.”

“There are other ways, Piper.”

“I disagree, Kai.”

“You hate him this much?” he asks. “You hate your life back home
this much
?”

I don’t hesitate.
“Yes.”

He flexes his jaw and takes a quick breath. “You hate
me
this much?”

I open my mouth to answer, but I lose the words on my tongue. “Why don’t you just say what you’re really thinking, Kai? For once. Just say it.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he seethes.

“I’m talking about the
real
reason why you don’t want me to stay here.” I gesture around the room. “The reason why you’re sitting in my mother’s kitchen right now. We both know it has nothing to do with Philip Lynch’s feelings.” He doesn’t answer. Instead, he stares back at me with shaking eyes. “Say it, Kai,” I beg him again, but still, he stays quiet. “You can’t, can you?
I don’t want you to leave me, Piper. I will miss you. I want you.
Say it!”

Kai licks his lips. “I don’t want you to leave me, Piper,” he repeats my words back at me slowly, his eyes never falling from mine. “I will miss you. I want you. And I’m in love with you.”

Thunder cries out as another bout of rain strikes the windows outside, but I can barely hear it over my pulse dominating my ears. My body forces a breath into my lungs before I stand up from my chair.

“Pipes—”

“Goodnight, Kai,” I whisper. I step away from the table and wander slowly to the back of the apartment. Every instinct in me wants me to turn around and look at him, but I keep my face forward until I reach my mother’s room.

I lie in bed, staring at the ceiling, as my mother dozes softly next to me.

Dammit, Kai…