Romance: The Bear's Desired Mate: BBW Bear Shifter Romance Standalone ( Shifter Romance, BBW, Werebear) (Spicy Shifters Book 1) (7 page)

7. His Mate Comes Home

Mary Ellen groaned and tugged at Amanda's arm.

"Come on, Amanda. You've been cooped up in here for over a week."

Amanda growled and pulled her arm away.

"I don't care." She hugged her pillow tighter to her chest and curled further into her dressing gown cocoon. "I'll stay in here longer if I have to."

"Until when?" Mary Ellen demanded.

"Forever for all I care." Amanda snapped.

It had been a week since Grayson had revealed that he was a shifter and Amanda was still smouldering. The anger had gone down to a sulk and then on to depression. Now she had retreated into her shell and refused to come out.

Grayson had lied to her. He might have thought he was sparing her but she would have wanted to know that sort of thing straight up. It infuriated her that he had made that sort of decision for her.

Her confidence, which had been sky-high in the last few weeks, was now rock-bottom. She didn't know if she could trust anyone anymore other than Mary Ellen. People just seemed to have an instinct to lie to her.

Her cell rang again, on the floor near the wall where she had thrown it. Mary Ellen retrieved it and checked the screen.

"Grayson's calling again."

Amanda swallowed and huddled tighter into her corner.

"I'm not talking to him." She said adamantly. "He needs to get the message that I don't want anything to do with him."

Mary Ellen sighed and cancelled the call. Tossing the cell onto the coffee table she ran her hands through her hair. After spending most of her time at Amanda's flat in the past week she was looking dishevelled and exhausted.

"Why don't you just let him explain what happened?"

Amanda knew she should. If she was behaving rationally she would let Grayson explain it to her and that would be the end of it. But the hurt at being lied to was still there. She shook her head.

"He didn't disclose that he was a shifter and I had to find out when I was in danger. He lied to me, Mary, and I'm not staying with another liar."

Even if he did save her life. Tommy had only a concussion and a broken arm after he had been thrown against that tree. Now he was under arrest and in custody and a restraining order had been given to Amanda so Tommy couldn't approach her if he got bail. Amanda was safe.

But she didn't feel like she was safe.

Mary Ellen sat on the sofa, nudging Amanda's feet out the way.

"So it's the fact that he lied to you that's the issue? Not because he's a shifter?"

She hadn't spoken to Mary Ellen about this beyond that Grayson had revealed he was a bear shifter but not in the way she wanted. She had left Amanda to her own devices.

"I have no problem with him being with a shifter, Mary. It's just that he didn't tell me." She swiped angrily at a tear. "Was he ever going to tell me?"

"In his own time, yes." Mary Ellen looked at her hands in her lap and took a breath as if bracing herself. "Listen, Amanda, Grayson has been spurned before by someone he thought he loved. He was gearing up to tell them about his shifter status but the woman walked out on him saying he had trust issues. And he does. He admits this. Things happened to him and this has made him wary about sharing what he really is."

Amanda listened to this, her heart clenching at the thought of another woman making Grayson the way he was. Then she narrowed her eyes at her friend when she realized that Mary Ellen spoke with genuine affection for her former lover.

"You talk as if you know him." She accused.

"Of course I know him. We've been friends since we were kids. We used to be neighbours and he would escape to hang out at my place whenever his parents shifted in their many fights."

Amanda was stunned. She had no idea.

"You never said." She said stupidly.

"You never asked." Mary Ellen looked up, her face pale and drawn. "But Grayson hasn't had much luck with women. When he met you I knew he would find what he wanted with you. I was right. He told me himself he was going to tell you because he trusted you not to run away. He has never hurt a woman and he is not going to start now."

Amanda didn't know what to say. Grayson trusted her. He did. He had saved her life and she had treated him badly. She closed her eyes as the realization washed over her.

"Oh, shit."

"Look, Amanda, that man is in love with you. I've never seen anyone so loved up as he is. You're his mate and he knows it. Having you like this with him is tearing him apart." Mary Ellen's eyes glowed. Amanda had never seen her this angry before.

"You need to get out of your self-pity and decide if this man is someone you should let walk away. Because he will eventually and you won't be able to get him back."

She flounced off the couch and snatched up her bag.

"I'll see myself out."

Amanda heard the door slam. Then she slumped on the couch, her face in her hands.

Mary Ellen was right. She had screwed up royally. Sulking wasn't going to get anyone anywhere. She had had a good man and she had run away because she had compared him to Tommy. There was no one to blame but herself.

She just hoped Grayson saw it that way.

#

Nothing seemed to be out of place when Mary Ellen pulled up outside Grayson's house but she could hear his stereo turned up loud. The pounding beat could be heard from the street.

Oh, boy. She had some serious work to do. After a week trying to get Amanda to come round to the realization that Grayson hadn't been malicious in his omission, Mary Ellen wasn't in the mood to deal with a moody bear. She had had enough to that when Grayson was a teenager.

Seeing a shifter without its mate was not a pretty sight. She needed to get him to stop feeling sorry for himself and win his mate back.

The pressure of the pulsing drum and bass hit her in the face as she went through the front door. It was so loud her head felt like it was about to explode. Clamping her hands over her ears, Mary Ellen went into the living room. Grayson was slouched on the sofa, staring at the TV as a child's cartoon paraded across the screen.

A half-empty bottle was in his hands and there were more bottles scattered across the floor, including several crushed cans. He was just dressed in a dark t-shirt and black sweatpants. Both looked as though he hadn't changed all week.

Mary Ellen went to the stereo and switched it off. The sudden silence made her wonder if she had gone deaf but it felt better once her ears stopped ringing. Then she went to the TV and turned it off, standing in front of it as she glared at Grayson.

"For crying out loud, Grayson! Why are you doing this?"

Grayson looked up at her morosely. His hair was unkempt and his eyes were sunken. Clearly he had not slept.

"Why do you think?" He growled. He glared at the bottle in his hand. "I wish I wasn't a shifter right now. I want to get drunk."

He sat up and threw the bottle at the wall. Mary Ellen caught it out of the air and put it on the coffee table.

"It's probably a good thing. I'd have to pour a gallon of coffee down your throat."

"Leave me alone, Mary Ellen." Grayson slumped back on the couch, a forearm over his eyes. "I don't want company."

"Tough. Your mate is out there and all you can do is attempt to drink yourself into a stupor."

Being a shifter had its advantages and because of their metabolism they couldn't get drunk like humans could. Unfortunately, that would mean drinking so much it would destroy their liver. It made drinking to forget a problem and Grayson, who only had one beer a week, was finding that out now.

"I should. My mate doesn't want me." He lowered his arm and gave Mary Ellen a desperate look. "I'm not a liar, Mary. I'm not."

Mary Ellen had never seen him like this before. He had been upset when his other girlfriends had left but he had never got so upset that he went into a deep depression. She sat beside him and pulled him into her arms, resting his head on her shoulder as she rocked him gently.

"I know. And Amanda knows that deep down. But she has been through a lot with her last relationship and she's still hurting. She doesn't like things being kept from her."

"What I did was for a good reason."

"She doesn't see it like that." Mary Ellen cuffed him on the side of the head. "She loves you and you lied to her."

That had the desired effect. Grayson needed something to get into his thick skull. He sat up and stared at her, hope starting to appear in his eyes.

"She loves me?"

"Of course she does. She wouldn't have reacted the way she did if she didn't." Mary grabbed the side of his neck and gave him a gentle shake. "You need to go out there and get her back."

The hope dwindled and Grayson shook his head.

"I can't." He said dejectedly. "She won't answer my calls or texts. I've given up."

Mary Ellen closed her eyes to keep control. Grayson was as pig-headed as Amanda. They suited each other if that was the only quality needed. But Amanda was depressed and Grayson was lost without his mate. They needed their heads banging together.

She opened her eyes and tapped his cheek hard. Grayson started.

"You're pathetic, do you know that?" Mary Ellen snapped. "You need to get your head out of your ass and buck up." She stood up, needing to get into the fresh air. Grayson's dark mood was sucking her in. "If you don't the best thing that's happened to you is going to disappear before you know it."

She didn't wait for Grayson's response. She left, hoping that the two people she cared about would actually listen to her. If they didn't she wasn't going to waste her time clearing up their mess.

#

Amanda paced nervously in the gym. This felt like a bad idea but she didn't know how to reach out. She couldn't bring herself to pick up the phone and call Grayson or go round to his house; he probably wouldn't answer the phone or would slam the door in her face. At least this way they were on familiar but neutral territory.

She had been a fool. That much was obvious. She hadn't given Grayson a chance to explain things to her; her past had overtaken her rationality and she had run. Grayson hadn't deserved that. He hadn't deserved to be treated the way she had treated him. She needed to make it up to him.

The question was would he forgive her? Or would he tell her to leave? She wouldn't be able to bear it if he turned her away.

The door opened and Grayson came through in a rush. He was carrying his bag and was wearing a button-down shirt and jeans, brown loafers on his feet. He looked gorgeous. Then Amanda saw the pale face, the sunken eyes and the downtrodden expression and her heart clenched. She had done this to him.

Grayson closed the door. He still hadn't seen her.

"Sorry I'm late but I..." He turned and laid eyes on her. He froze. "Amanda."

Amanda twisted her hands together. She gave him a nervous smile.

"Hi, Grayson."

She watched him look over her slowly, heat gathering in his gaze. In an attempt to seduce him, she had chosen the dress they had worn on their first date. She hoped he would remember the memories of that first night together.

It was still ripped at the back but Mary Ellen had put on some Velcro straps to keep it together. The only difference was what she wore underneath. That would certainly make Grayson's mouth water.

She hoped.

Grayson looked up at her, his expression confused.

"I thought you cancelled our sessions."

"I set this one up. I didn't want you to know it was me."

"But someone could walk in."

There was a sudden loud noise coming from the door and Grayson turned to look at it. Amanda smiled. She knew who it was.

"That will be Mary Ellen locking the door. She'll put up a do not enter sign outside and do the same with the locker rooms." She spread her hands. "We won't be disturbed."

The staff was in on this and were up for getting Grayson alone with Amanda. They had made sure everyone but Grayson knew the gym was closed for the day. Now she had to get on her knees and beg Grayson to forgive her.

Grayson turned back to her. He looked wary.

"Why are you doing this, Amanda?"

"I wanted to apologize."

Amanda want to go to him but knew he wasn't ready. She swallowed and fought back the tears. She wasn't supposed to cry. They were supposed to talk. She didn't want tears.

"My behaviour was unacceptable. I shouldn't have done what I did." The tears escaped and began to fall. "I'm so sorry, Grayson."

Grayson's expression softened. Before Amanda knew what he was doing he had dropped his bag, strode across to her and pulled her into his arms. Amanda kissed him back when his mouth came down on hers, allowing him to control it. His arms tightened round her, holding her close. Amanda clutched at his shirt and held on. She wasn't letting him go again.

Eventually Grayson raised his head. His eyes were glowing now, a look Amanda was familiar with. Her core began to throb, demanding to have some attention.

"I understand why you were angry." Grayson said hoarsely. He cupped her cheek tenderly in his hand. "I kept back I was a shifter because I was scared you'd leave me."

"You thought I'd be repulsed because you were a shifter?"

Amanda couldn't understand that. Shifters were fascinating and she could see the seduction behind it. She would love to be a shifter.

Grayson grimaced.

"Humans know about shifters and like the idea of it but when it becomes a reality they tend to have different attitude." His eyes were full of pain. "I've always kept it secret."

Amanda's heart went out to him. Wiping the tears from her eyes, she put her arms round his neck and kissed him gently.

"Just so you know I have no problem with shifters." She licked his bottom lip slowly. "And it certainly explains you're...sexual appetite. I didn't quite believe Mary Ellen when she said shifters have an insatiable desire for sex and it can go on for hours."

Grayson laughed.

"Wolves can fuck for hours. I don't know about bears."

"Take it from me, I wouldn't complain if you did."

Amanda closed her eyes and hugged him, feeling him embrace her in return. She kissed his neck and leant her head on his chest.

"I love you, Grayson. And I'm so sorry for what I did. Can you forgive me?"

"If you can forgive me for not telling you straightaway about myself?"

Amanda nodded. She could readily forgive him for anything right now. Grayson gently eased her back and kissed her softly.

"I love you, Amanda. I'm not going to let you go again."

"You'd better not. Or Mary Ellen will kill you."

"You going to set Mary Ellen on me if something goes wrong?"

Amanda grinned.

"Of course."

Giving him one more kiss she stepped out of his reach. Grayson's expression was heated with desire as he raked his gaze over her but he didn't follow.

Her confidence growing, Amanda undid the Velcro straps and the dress slipped down, pooling at her feet. She had forgone her bra and panties and only wore thigh-high stockings with four-inch heels. Mary Ellen had told her it would knock Grayson on his ass.

It had the desired effect. Grayson's eyes turned golden and flared. Amanda ran her hands up to her breasts and cupped them.

"Make love to me, Grayson. Right here."

Grayson growled. Clothes flew everywhere and then he was naked. He swept Amanda into his arms, his mouth claiming hers in a ferocious kiss. Amanda clutched at him as he hoisted her up, wrapping her legs round his waist. His cock rubbed against her pussy and she wriggled, trying to get him inside her.

Grayson pulled away and held her still.

"Easy there, honey. I'm not having this over quickly." He took her to the mats and laid her down, the mat cool against her back. Then a sly glint was in his eye and he nodded at the full-length mirrors. "Watch us. I want you to watch while I make love to you. I want to hear you scream."

Amanda looked over. She had an unobstructed view of them, naked except for her stockings and heels. Grayson's huge, lean form looked magnificent, his muscles flexing as he made his way down her body, lavishing her breasts enough to make Amanda's pussy clench as the blood rushed south. Then he moved further down, moving her legs out wide and holding them there.

Amanda cried out when she felt his mouth touch her folds. He didn't ease her into it. He fucked her with his mouth and tongue, leaving no area left out. He plunged two fingers into her pussy and pumped them hard as he nibbled on her clit.

Amanda could feel the orgasm building fast. She writhed but Grayson held her tight with his arms across her waist as he feasted on her. Seeing him between her legs, head bobbing as he licked and plunged into her with his tongue, in the mirror looked incredibly erotic. Amanda couldn't take her eyes off the sight, at how beautiful Grayson looked and how amazing she looked.

The orgasm hit her between the eyes and her world exploded in a flash of bright lights. Screaming his name, Amanda arched her back as her body was overcome by tremors. Grayson kept his attack up on her pussy, drawing it out as long as he could. It was only when Amanda pushed at his head that he slowed down. She didn't have the ability to speak at this point.

Grayson raised his head, his mouth wet with her juices.

"Did you watch us?" He growled.

His eyes were at their brightest. Amanda nodded. She was still at a loss with words. Grayson grinned and pulled her up, sitting back on his knees with Amanda in his lap. He shifted her until she was straddling him and pulled her down on his cock. Amanda felt it fill her up and her pussy screamed in relief. It felt so good to feel him inside her again.

Amanda closed her eyes to the sensation and arched back, tilting her hips to take more of him in. Grayson groaned and eased her upright, cupping her head in his hands.

"Amanda, look at me."

Amanda opened her eyes. Grayson looked serious. The glowing had dimmed a little but there was no mistaking the expression in his face. He was breathing heavily, holding off from their lovemaking.

"Marry me."

Amanda didn't need to think twice. She kissed him, pulling at his bottom lip with her teeth.

"Yes." She whispered. Then she wrapped her legs round his waist. "Now make me yours. Make me scream."

Grayson growled and pulled out to thrust back in hard. Amanda thrust back, feeling them all the way to the top of her head. Grayson was unrelenting.

He fucked her, holding Amanda tight as he pumped into her. Amanda took him all, biting onto his shoulder when it started getting too much. She needed to come now or she was going to die.

Suddenly Grayson pulled out of her. Amanda started to protest but Grayson turned her onto her hands and knees, making her face the mirror. He leant over her and sucked her ear lobe into his mouth.

"Watch us. Watch us when I mark you as mine."

Amanda looked. Grayson was poised behind her, his muscular body sweaty. His eyes were bright and she saw his teeth elongating. Hands gripped her hips and Amanda saw the claws, the claws that had torn holes in her bedding. But she didn't feel any fear. The arousal deepened. She wanted this. She spread her legs wider.

"Take me."

Grayson roared and thrust in to the hilt. He pounded into her, Amanda moving across the mat with his thrusts. They ended up with Amanda lying on her front, Grayson on top of her jackhammering into her. He moved her hair aside and planted slow, gentle kisses on her shoulder and neck. He didn't let up on his relentless thrusting. Amanda's head was spinning with the contrast.

When she finally came screaming Grayson bit down on her shoulder. Momentary pain flashed through Amanda but was quickly replaced by a pleasure so acute she was coming again. Grayson growled into her neck and then he was coming, a final thrust making Amanda dizzy.

He released her neck and licked at the marks. As she watched in the mirrors, the bite mark that was clearly there when he let go started to disappear. Amanda could only watch in amazement as it faded until there was a very faint mark on her shoulder. Grayson then planted a gentle kiss on top of the mark.

"There. You are mine." He whispered, nibbling at her ear. "You're my mate now, Amanda. I love you."

Amanda arched into him and felt his cock swell again. He was hard in mere seconds and his cock twitched. She moaned and managed to push Grayson off. Grayson went onto his back and Amanda straddled him before he could protest. She leant over him with a sly grin.

"I thought you were going to make me scream."

Grayson grinned and kissed her before she finished. It was a while before she was able to find the ability to speak.