Role Play (11 page)

But when
I thought about him, a rush went through me, betraying me. I shouldn’t want him, even though there was so much to want. A man like that was no good for a girl like me. But it felt so right.

I
wished I had someone I could talk to. It was only because I was lonely that I had fixated on Victor this way.

Then coming in late from
my class on Wednesday, I picked up the mail from our box in the hallway wall. There was a notice from ConEd that Lola’s electronic payment had bounced.

…

Much later, I was already in bed by the time Lola got home. But I got up to show my sister the notice. “This is exactly what I’m worried about!”

Lola rolled her eyes. “It wasn’t my fault. They deposited my paycheck a day late.”

I shook the bill at her. “You need to keep more than $76.42 in your account. You can’t let it go that low or things are bound to slip up.”

“Don’t tell me what to do!” Lola rounded on
me. “Are you talking to Dick?”

I
drew back at her sudden vehemence. “He texts me sometimes, but I haven’t answered since last week.”

“I just found him parked up the street watching our place. It’s seriously creepy. You better not be talking to him about me.”

“He’s an idiot,” I said, thinking about the Chamber, where he had tossed me inside without a care for what would happen to me. “I won’t tell him anything. You can trust me, Lola.”

But Lola didn’t look like she believed
me. I was so wigged out by the thought of Dick sitting out there watching me sit at home alone every night, that I didn’t realize until I was lying in bed that Lola had deflected me away from the bounced check.

I
felt like I was standing on a precipice, with no one to steady me as the wind screamed past me. Lola, on the other hand, fell asleep instantly and slept like a rock.

Chapter 8

Victor

With ruthless precision, I waited until Thursday before I texted Sierra. I wanted her. Bad. But I would only take advantage of her if she made it clear she was after me because I was rich.

I
texted with no preamble:
You want to go to a party where Lola will be this weekend?

After a few minutes, a text came back from Sierra
:
Yes.

I
replied:
It’s a private party. I’ll wrangle us an invite and get back to you.

Much quicker, her text came back
:
Thanks so much!

I
tucked my phone back in my pocket and got into the trolley. A plane was approaching Gate 23, and I was on baggage detail.

I
tried not to think about Sierra as I heaved bags from the belt to the cart. I’d been trying not to think about her all week, but it was no good. I couldn’t wait to see her again, as much as I tried to bury that feeling. After all, every sign pointed to her being a gold-digger. She was willing to spy on her own sister, so she was definitely the kind of girl who did whatever it took to get what she wanted.

It was up to
me to find out what she wanted.

To get a party invitation,
I was going to have to do something I had been avoiding lately. Tricia was the one in-the-know who could get me into that party. She might even be going herself.

But
I had to be careful about how I did this. If I texted Tricia, she would think it was a booty call and she would be mad if I didn’t go through with it. I couldn’t deal with Tricia right now; I was already irritated too much from Sierra bringing up my fancy imaginary job on the heels of our passionate kisses.

There was no doubt in my mind that
Tricia only wanted me for my money, and she would dump me in a hot second if she thought I was a lesser man. She literally begged me to take her to expensive restaurants and on trips with me. But I had her convinced that I wasn’t into having a girlfriend, so she had been lingering in fuck buddy and occasional play partner status for nearly two years, longer than I had managed to string any other woman along. That was probably more a testament to her perseverance and determination to get what she wanted, rather than my charms.

So
I waited until late that night and signed onto FetLife. Sure enough, Tricia was posting in some of her groups. She was networked into the BDSM community like nobody else. Even her profile photo showed her face, blowing a kiss at the masses.

I
noticed that she had recently changed her relationship status to “In an open relationship with” some guy who lived in Brooklyn. Last year she had added me to her list as “Friends with benefits,” and I was still linked to her that way.

I
hoped her new relationship would make this easier. I sent Tricia a message through the website’s kinky chat.
Hey sexy! What’s up?

Tricia replied instantly:
Nothing much. What about you? Cheeky said you were at Pleasure Salon last weekend.

I
hadn’t even noticed Cheeky; I had been so focused on Sierra. Then again, I had only seen Cheeky around a couple of times, so she could have been standing right in front of me. It reminded me of how tight-knit the BDSM community was that Tricia was getting reports on me. I was very lucky that Sierra didn’t want to make a big deal out of what I had done to her at the Chamber or my toehold in that world could have been jerked away from me.

I
had never gotten more involved with anyone I met in the scene because I wasn’t being honest about who I was. You could only get to be so friendly with people when you couldn’t talk about what you did every day.

So
my relationship with Tricia, and all the other girls I played with, stayed superficial by necessity. My only real love had been Adrianne. And she ripped my heart out when she left.

To Tricia,
I typed:
I’m showing a friend around the scene. We want to go to Blain’s party in Tribeca this Saturday.

I’m going to be there,
she said.
With my new boyfriend.

Naturally Tricia
would want some stroking before we got to the dickering. Since it was an open relationship, that meant she could still play with other people, meaning me.

I
replied:
I saw that you were in a relationship, congratulations!

I’ve
been needing that in my life. I like having the emotional support.

I
t was typical of Tricia that she explained her relationship in terms of how it benefited her.

I
texted:
I’d like to meet him. Can you get me an invite?

You and your new girl?

Hardly that. I’m showing her the ropes.

I’m sure you’re showing her everything you’ve got
,
she replied.

Now
I was even more irritated. Getting the occasional bang from Tricia wasn’t worth the hassle she gave me. I didn’t reply to her overt jealousy. It didn’t deserve to be noticed.

Our
words lingered on the chat record. I knew Tricia would be looking at them, wheels turning around in her head as she tried to figure out the best angle for her. Did she want me at a party where her new man would be? Did she want to help me make time with another girl? Would she figure that making my life easy was a step in the right direction to being girlfriend material?

Finally her reply came through, as
I knew it would.
I’ll get you that invite.

I
smiled. She was still in the palm of my hand.

The next morning,
I dug into the back of my closet. There were a couple of boxes of fetishwear that Adrianne had left behind as not fit for her new life with a politically correct husband. I had been doling out the leather collars and PVC dresses to girls ever since. There was something I had in mind for Sierra—a half hood that would cover her eyes and the top of her head, with a hole where her pony tail could stick through on top. There was also a black cat-suit in heavy nylon.

I
got the cat-suit cleaned the next day and polished the leather of the hood until it was a deep shiny black. It looked and smelled like new. The cat-suit was practically new, and once it was cleaned, she would never know it had been worn.

If she did find out, she wouldn’t like it. But
if she was a greedy little girl like Tricia, then she would expect to get gifts from men like me. Her reaction when I gave her the clothes would tell me what I needed to know. Women who didn’t want a guy for his money had too much pride to take gifts from a man they just met. I’d met a few. Women like Tricia squealed and grabbed what you gave them, and then asked for more like a spoiled child.

It remained to be seen which camp Sierra fell into.

Chapter 9

Sierra

When
I got to the corner where Victor told me to meet him, he wasn’t there yet. I waited in front of the Korean nail salon, trying to calm my jitters. I wasn’t sure whether I was more nervous about seeing Victor again or seeing what Lola was capable of next.

I
saw him coming up the street towards me, his hair blowing in the breeze. He looked so manly, his arms stretching the sleeves of his black T-shirt. I liked the fact that even though he was a busy businessman, he kept himself fit. For the first time, his clothes didn’t reek of money—he wore faded jeans with holes in the thigh and motorcycle boots.

“Hi,”
I said. “How was Atlanta?”

“The usual,” he tossed off, looking
me up and down. “Your outfit’s no good. You look like a waitress.”

I
looked down at my black button-up shirt and skirt. “You said you were going to help me with a disguise.”

Victor
patted the messenger bag slung over his shoulder. “I’ve got it in here. You’ll have to change at the party.”

“What if
Lola sees me first?”

“I’ll make sure that doesn’t happen.”

His tone was final, like I shouldn’t question his judgment. I wasn’t used to men who were so definite about things. Is that what it took to be successful? Telling everyone the way it was?

“Are you
ready to do this?” he asked. “Once we’re in there, you’ll have to play the part or we won’t blend in.”

“What kind of
part?”

“As my submissive.”

A flow of people were walking past us on the sidewalk, within arm’s reach. But nobody was paying any attention to us. Still, it was a weird place to have this kind of discussion.

“What do I have to do?”
I asked.

He raised one brow.
“Whatever I say.”

He wasn’t smiling or joking about it. This was the serious Victor, the one who had devoured
me with his eyes as he lured me into letting him touch me again.

“That’s too open-ended for me,”
I finally said.

“What are your limits?”

I licked my lips nervously. “What will people be doing?”

“Some
will have sex. Others will do BDSM.”
“So it’s even more extreme than the Chamber?”

“It’s completely different. It’s a private party. You have to know
Blain to get an invite. You can be more open at a party because it’s safe. We’ll see all sorts of things.”

“No sex
for me,” I managed to say. “No way.”

“Okay, no sex. What else?”

“I’m not getting naked. Your disguise better be more than two scraps of material or I’m not putting it on.”

Finally he smiled. “You’ll be completely covered except for your chin and your beautiful mouth.” He
reached out to lightly stroke my chin. “Any more limits?”

“Can I add
more things as we go along?”

“You’v
e become a better negotiator, Sierra. Yes, feel free to add things to the ‘Do not’ list.”

I
looked at him for a few seconds longer, trying to figure out my own feelings. He wasn’t being very warm. In fact, the cool, restrained man I had left at the bar last week was standing right here in front of me. Not the man who had looked so guilty when he found out why I went to the Chamber. Not the man who made it up to me by touching me so sweetly...

But this was
my only chance to see Lola. And I couldn’t deny that I was fascinated by Victor. He could mesmerize me with a look, or dismiss me with just a turn of his head. I never knew how he would react. It was frustrating, but also exciting.

Like
I was going to leap off my lonely precipice holding his hand.
Who knows where I’ll land?

“Okay, let’s do this,”
I said.