ROAR (4 page)

Were the two so far out of sync?

Sometimes, she wondered if a long-term relationship was in the cards for her.

Her thoughts returned to the tour group dressed in business attire. A man in a well-tailored suit was one of her favorite fantasies, and Kristoffer wore his like no other. With his rakishly wavy blond hair falling nearly to his shoulders—loose and disheveled as if windblown or finger-combed—his light-gray, tailored, three-piece business suit made him stand out among the group, not only because she recognized him.

Her cheeks flushed again as Kristoffer’s gaze homed in on her body and lingered much longer than it should have, in her opinion. His piercing blue eyes bore into her with an intensity not unlike his cousin’s. Was he a Dom as well? During those first few moments, Kristoffer had shattered every ounce of courage and poise she’d mustered in order to stand naked in front of the class, while the calm, cool Kristoffer Larson continued to maintain a tight rein on his emotions, much like the first time they’d met. What had he been thinking?

The heat in Pamela’s cheeks was slow to disperse until Mrs. Fieri tapped her shoulder to regain her attention before sending Pamela back to her seat.
Great
. Now she was losing her focus on her classwork. She slipped into the short, silky robe she’d been wearing earlier and returned to her seat.

Why had she acquiesced when the instructor encouraged her to do this? After her first disappointing auction last weekend, she’d indicated an interest in becoming more comfortable being naked around strangers.

This first week at the academy had gone far beyond her comfort level. In this, her eighth day of classes, she’d gathered the courage to stand naked in front of the class—and look how that had turned out.

The school had respected her hard limits, including not wanting to engage in intercourse with people she barely knew. Sex was too…personal. Jumping in too quickly could have disastrous ramifications as had happened in the past. With Marc, she’d invested too much of herself in their three short months together, convinced they were well-matched until his inability to commit to anything more than being her Top in the bedroom became clear.

Such a dark, mixed-up time in her life. Just before she met Marc she’d been dismissed from her job because some jealous wife thought she had designs on her husband. As if she had time to be involved with a married man while trying to establish her career. Christ, she’d barely dated since her undergrad days. What surgeon had time for extracurricular activities? It was one of the reasons she’d decided to take some time for herself during this forced recuperation period following her unexpected illness during her last contracted assignment.

In retrospect, perhaps she’d come up with the notion that she wanted to have a Master/slave dynamic with Marc because of the insecurity she’d experienced at the time. She’d been so ashamed of being fired from a successful practice that she hadn’t even told Marc about her career going down the tubes. She’d hung on to the misbelief that she wanted to be a slave long after he’d left. By the time he showed up on her doorstep a year later, she’d begun the application process for a position with the humanitarian medical team. The only thing that had become clear in all that misery was that she needed to find a way to serve others. Performing cosmetic surgery on affluent patients wasn’t why she’d gone to medical school.

Being sent to war-ravaged, impoverished areas in a global effort to ease suffering had been the best decision in her life. Meeting Heidi had been a turning point, though. Having been shut off from any BDSM activities for nearly four years, her desire to explore again had become acute. She wanted to meet someone interested in at least being her Top for play scenes to help release some stress when inundated at work and nothing short of submission could keep her from becoming too overwhelmed.

The image of her bent over Kristoffer Larson’s desk flashed across her mind, bringing her back to the classroom. Why him and not Gunnar? She had no clue if Kristoffer was Dominant. Alpha? Most definitely. But not just any Dom would be able to maintain control of a strong-willed alpha sub.

Kristoffer hadn’t expressed any interest other than an appreciation of her nude body. She needed more than a physical attraction this time around. Before starting another relationship, she intended to take her time and make sure she was compatible for the long haul. At thirty-eight, with no expectations of marriage or children, she wanted to find someone at the very least who shared interests with her, had the ability to hold intelligent conversations, and most definitely possessed a deep, mutual respect for her.

Pamela sighed. She didn’t want to shut men out the way her mom did, but she also didn’t want to hook up with the wrong one again, either. She enjoyed the company of men as friends and colleagues, but didn’t see conventional love and marriage as being in the cards for her given her pitiful track record.

One thing was certain, though. Gone were the days of her trying to live up to someone else’s expectations. This six-week course would be her first big step toward living the life
she
wanted.

Speaking of which, focus, woman!

One of the rules at the academy was to remain consciously in the moment, and here she was with her head in the clouds, as Dad would say. She needed to let go of the past, concentrate, and learn everything she could during her brief time here.

“Your attention, please.” Mrs. Fieri stared pointedly at Pamela. If she didn’t pay better attention, she’d be disciplined.

Pamela tried hard to pay close attention to the remainder of the class, but the image of Kristoffer Larson’s dumbfounded face continued to shatter any concentration she could muster. She grinned. In retrospect, his expression had been rather funny.

After the class was dismissed, her instructor called her to the front of the room. With dread, she moved between the desks to stand before the lectern. “How are you feeling about your role in the anatomy lesson, Doctor Jeffrey?” Pamela kept her eyes respectfully downcast, thankful she didn’t have to meet the demanding woman’s gaze.

“Look at me.”

Drat
.

She raised her head. “I wasn’t nervous…at first.”

“What changed? Was having classmates pointing to and naming the parts of your body problematic, or was it the group coming into the room to observe the class that threw off your focus this time?”

Apparently, her lack of concentration was obvious. “I…I guess I lost my focus when the group arrived. It…was easier being naked in front of my classmates, because we’ve all had to bare ourselves in so many ways to each other at some point.”

Mrs. Fieri tilted her head in a questioning manner, making Pamela even more uncomfortable. Did she suspect Pamela was being less than honest?

The desire to come clean compelled her to explain. “Actually, I recognized someone in the tour group, which was…awkward, to say the least. Probably as uncomfortable for him as it was for me. I can’t run the risk of being outed in the vanilla community.”

Her instructor held her head higher. “The Denver Academy attracts a number of socially important people in the area. I assure you no one steps inside those front doors without being fully reviewed and cleared and after signing confidentiality agreements. Nothing they see inside these walls will be discussed in any identifying way outside without the consent of all parties involved. I hope this lack of trust in our ability to protect you won’t continue be a problem for you in the future.”

“No, Mrs. Fieri.”
Not anymore.

And yet the image of the uptight and controlled Kristoffer remained steadfast in her mind’s eye. Why him? She knew nothing about him. They hadn’t even engaged in idle chitchat during or after their one meeting. He’d appeared to be serious and formal to the extreme, even when talking with his cousin during the meeting.

Maybe she hadn’t been able to forget about him because he was sexier than sin in the suits he’d worn both times she’d seen him. Well-defined shoulders, but not muscle-bound like his cousin’s. Okay, truth be told, she’d felt an attraction to the man.

But only a physical one. Not enough.

“Why don’t you get dressed?” The instructor’s voice pulled her wandering mind back again. “Tonight’s practicum should be much more relaxing, especially for you.”

When she didn’t elaborate on what to expect, Pamela nodded and returned to her desk to collect her things.

At least she’d accomplished one of her goals—to stand naked in front of strangers. While her body was past its prime, it still had curves in all the right places.

And Kristoffer Larson wasn’t able to keep his eyes off of you.

Her heart rate increased. She couldn’t escape the image of Kristoffer in that suit—only now the mental picture of him removing it began to take hold of her.

Pamela smiled. At least her fantasy life had remained active all of these years.

Before leaving the classroom, she turned back to the front of the room. “Have a good evening, Mrs. Fieri. Thank you for the lesson.”

*     *     *

Kristoffer managed to regain control of his wayward thoughts as the tour continued, viewing the academy’s practice rooms. Each was equipped for a wide variety of lifestyle scening, including one set up like a kitchen. His thoughts strayed again, remembering playful moments with Tori in the kitchen of their former home. She enjoyed keeping house, and that room was one of her favorite places to be no matter what activity she was indulging in—be it domestic or sexual.

But the headmaster soon reined in Kristoffer’s stray thoughts. “We want every graduating student to please their Master’s full range of appetites. I have seen firsthand that some of the submissives we train are in dire need of culinary instruction.”

Ah.
He was referring to actual
cooking
lessons!

Kristoffer smiled before tuning in to the people around him. Anderson glanced pointedly at the brunette with heavy eyeglasses and chuckled before leading the group down the hall. The two definitely had some kind of history. Would that give her an inside advantage if there was a bidding war?

They stepped inside a large auditorium, which Anderson described as his crowning achievement. He clearly loved this place. This room alone would be worth placing a bid on the facility. Kristoffer imagined a submissive spread eagle and restrained on the stage as his cousin wielded his whip with precision and skill, while a group of Dominants looked on and learned. Would there be enough room for whip play here?

As he conjured up a mock scene, the illusory submissive had ginger hair and a small tattoo on her ass.

Bloody hell.

He shook his head to clear it of errant thoughts and remembered his purpose for being here. “This is quite a remarkable set-up you have.”

Anderson thanked him. “It’s my belief that to create superior graduates, you must utilize superior equipment and hire only the best trainers.”

The tour group left and moved down another hall to enter a large dungeon area. “Unlike the Submissive Training Center in California, this warehouse is large enough to include a dungeon area specially designed for use of the bullwhip.”

Yes, this space would be even better than what he’d previously seen, but once again, the image of a ginger-haired sprite popped into his mind.
Don’t go there
. Still, the fantasy of Doctor Pamela Jeffrey suspended or restrained in any number of ways in this dungeon wouldn’t let go. Noticing a tightness in his chest, he reminded himself to breathe.

Tuning in yet again, he learned that all of the high-quality BDSM equipment on the premises would be included in the purchase of the Academy, along with the retention of any staff members wishing to remain. So Anderson apparently intended to separate from the school completely, which would allow the new owner to reopen its doors without missing a beat, thus making ownership even more profitable now. He knew the tuition here didn’t come cheaply by what Gunnar had told him this afternoon.

A question nagged at him as he tucked a loose strand of hair behind his ear. “Will training continue for the current class of students if the academy changes hands within the next six weeks?”

Anderson spoke to the entire group when he responded. “Rest assured, Mr. Larson, as headmaster of the school, I will not be abandoning my students. Only after this class has graduated will the transfer of ownership take place.”

Nodding curtly, he tried not to think about what this might mean as far as one petite, ginger-haired student was concerned. He hoped future business negotiations would be conducted during daytime hours when students were absent from the premises. Still, Kristoffer wanted to pore over some financials with Anderson or his accountant before leaving here tonight. Not to mention that the thought of interviewing Doctor Jeffrey to gain insights on the institution from a student’s perspective hadn’t eluded him.

No, he’d try to avoid further contact with her at all costs.

Regaining his focus, he knew Gunnar would appreciate that the school also had tracks geared toward training serious Dominants wanting to learn new skills and improve their technique. With wannabe Doms coming out of the woodwork and so much bad information in the media about the lifestyle in recent years, Kristoffer could see that such an academy would be beneficial in helping submissives learn the difference between posers and authentic Dominants, too.

Fortunately, he and Tori had been mentored by Gunnar even at their elemental level of play, and safety had always been his and Gunnar’s first priority. Safe, sane, and consensual was the motto for those in the lifestyle, unless they agreed to take it to the next level with risk-aware kink, but even that was always consensual among those playing at Gunnar’s and many other dungeons and clubs, not to mention in the privacy of their homes.

One of the greatest advantages for Gunnar would be to use the school as a place to train those he mentored, thus cutting down on the number of people permitted inside his private dungeon in Breckenridge. With terrorists infiltrating so many organizations and government systems, Gunnar left himself open to an attack from within by holding play parties in his own home. While he carefully checked the background of everyone who drove inside the gates of his compound, one could never be too careful in his line of work. He’d amassed a number of enemies over the years.