Road to Redemption (5 page)

“Noted.” He cocked his head. “You really gonna make me wait?”

I choked on the shake I’d just sucked into my mouth. I slapped my chest and took a few deep breaths to calm the coughing. “You did
not
just ask me that.”

“We’re bein’ honest, babe. Need to know where I stand.”

“Um, yeah, I’m going to make you wait. I’ve never slept with anyone I wasn’t in love with and you won’t be the first.”

He grasped his heart. “You wound me.”

I giggled. “You wanted honest, bub. You got honest.”

He grinned and leaned forward. “I’ll wait, baby, but that don’t mean I’m not gonna wear you down.” He slipped his hand to my neck and stroked my jaw. “And kissing better not be off the table, or we’re gonna have a problem.”

I licked my lips. “No, kissing’s most definitely
not
off the table.”

Hawk guided my legs to the ground and pulled me against him, lowering his mouth to mine. As he deepened the kiss, he slid his hand to my neck, and ran his thumb over my pulse. I loved kissing, had kissed a lot of boys and men in my day, but Alex was by far the best I’d ever experienced.

To me kissing was like holding hands… no big deal. Sex was different. It was intimate and when I slept with a man, it was because I thought there was the chance we’d last forever. There’d only been two that fell into that category for me and they’d both lasted several years, ending amicably.

But kissing Alex was different. I felt like he was giving me everything and I wanted to give him everything back. I broke the kiss and stroked his cheek as I tried to catch my breath. “You’re freaking me out a little.”

He smiled, his blue eyes soft and sweet. “Baby, there’s no pressure. We’re gettin’ to know each other.”

“I get that in theory, but you…” I shook my head, not wanting to finish my thought.

“What?”

Gah!
I bit my lip. “You kiss me like that and I forget my manners.”

Alex chuckled. “Well, I’m doin’ it right then.”

I rolled my eyes. “You’re impossible.”

“Won’t ever make you do somethin’ you don’t want to, baby, but I fuckin’ love kissin’ you.” He smiled. “And you just admitted you love kissin’ me, so, gonna make that work for me.”

“It works, handsome. Just might work a little too well.”

He grinned and kissed me again, until his phone interrupted the moment. “Hey, Kayla. Lily okay?” he asked, and wrapped an arm around me, pulling me against him. “Yeah. Probably in a couple of hours. Put her on.” I snuggled closer to Alex as he talked on the phone. “Hey, baby. No, I’ll be home after you go to bed. You being good for Kayla?” He chuckled. “Kisses back. Love you to the moon, baby girl. Okay. Put auntie back on.” He kissed my temple and gave me a gentle squeeze. “You okay? Sure? Yeah, really appreciate it, Kay. Yeah.” He chuckled. “Okay. ’Bye.”

“You’re really sweet, Alex.”

“Don’t tell anyone that, baby. Bounty hunters aren’t supposed to be sweet.”

I giggled. “My lips are sealed.”

“What’s your work schedule over the next few weeks?”

“I’m working all week.” I craned my head to look up at him. “Then the following week, school’s out Wednesday through Friday for Thanksgiving week, but otherwise, I’m typically working until about four every day.”

“Right, Thanksgiving.”

I smiled. “Do you have plans?”

“Usually go to the club.”

“Are you committed to that?” I asked.

“Not necessarily. Why?”

“Because you’re welcome to join us. We cook a butt-load of food and there’s football and pie. A lot of pie.” I smiled. “Plus a gaggle of kids to keep Lily occupied. You’re sister’s welcome too.”

“Let’s play it by ear, yeah?”

I nodded and stared out at the water. I couldn’t explain it, but the fact that he didn’t jump at the chance to spend Thanksgiving with me really disappointed me. I’d been hesitant to get involved with him and yet, here I was sad that he wanted to play it by ear.

Obviously, I was insane.

Or a woman.

Sometimes I wondered if there was much difference.

“You okay?” he said against my ear.

“Hmm-mm.”

“You gonna share what’s pissed you off?”

I frowned up at him. “I’m not pissed off.”

He studied me for a few seconds. “Somethin’s off, babe.”

I sighed, pulling away from the warmth of his body and facing him. Settling my chin on my drawn up knees again, I forced a smile. “I’m working out my feelings, Alex. You’ve just gotta give me a little time.”

“I’m givin’ you an out for Thanksgiving, babe.”

“What do you mean?”

“We’re playin’ it by ear so you can un-invite me if you want to.”

I sat up. “Why would I un-invite you?”

He chuckled. “Because you’re workin’ out your feelings. You might decide you’re not ready for your very stable family to meet my equally unstable one.”

I wrinkled my nose. “Well, thanks for putting words in my mouth.”

“I’m not lookin’ to put words in your mouth or start a fight, babe. Just want to give you an out.”

“Well, I don’t want an out,” I said. “You are officially invited to Thanksgiving.”

“Okay.” He grinned. “I’ll check with my sister, but that sounds good. Thank you.”

Our awkward moment was broken when my phone pealed in the silence. I dug in my purse and pulled it out. “Hello.”

“Hey, honey, just checking to see when you’ll be home,” my mom said.

“Probably in a couple of hours. Everything okay?”

“Of course. Just like to know when my chickens are back in the coop.”

I giggled. “I’m the only chicken, Mom. Everyone else was smart enough to fly away.”

“I’m waiting for everyone to come back.”

“Good luck with that.”

“Dad and I are going to watch a movie, so just text me when you’re inside and have locked up.”

“Will do. Hey, I’ve invited a couple of friends for Thanksgiving, is that a problem?”

“The more the merrier, honey. We’ll discuss details the week of.”

“Sounds good. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Okey doke. Love you.”

I smiled. “Love you too, Mom. ’Bye.” I hung up and dropped my phone back into my purse.

“What was it like livin’ in a Cleaver house?”

I shrugged. “I wish I could say something profound and deep that would sum everything up, but honestly, it was awesome. We’re all still really close. I’m guessing your home life wasn’t so good?”

“Dad’s in jail for sex crimes against the foster kids my parents took in and my mom didn’t do a fuckin’ thing to stop it, so yeah, mine wasn’t so good. But it’s done, so I don’t dwell.”

“I’m sorry, Alex. That sucks.” I squeezed his arm. “It sounds like you’re making things really happy for Lily, though. You’re breaking a cycle of sorts.”

“Yeah.” He stood. “You done?”

“Um, yeah.”

“Okay, I’ll take you home.”

“O-okay,” I stuttered. Apparently he was working out his feelings too, and the subject of his life was not a good one, so I didn’t press.

I folded the blanket he’d wrapped around me and handed it back to him before gathering my stuff up while he locked up the boat. Alex helped me back onto the pier and then released my hand and I was forced to jog to catch up to him. “Alex, wait.”

He stopped, but didn’t turn around.

“What just happened?” I asked.

He faced me, his face impassive. “What do you mean?”

“I don’t play that game, Hawk. You know exactly what I mean. If you don’t want to talk about it right now or want to revisit it later, I’m fine with that, but don’t act dumb, and if you say ‘nothing,’ in answer to any of my questions that start with ‘what’s wrong?’ I will maim you.”

“I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

“Is it something I said?”

“Fuck, Payton, you just said you’d be fine with that answer.”

“I am…”
sort of,
“… so long as I didn’t do something to offend you.”

He shook his head. “You didn’t do anything to offend me. Can we go now?”

I nodded and followed him again, this time able to stay in sync with him, however, he still didn’t touch me. He held the door of the truck open, waited for me to climb up, and then made his way to the driver’s side.

The drive home was excruciating. He said nothing. Nada, zip, nuttin’ honey. Just focused on the road. I originally thought I might have hit a nerve on the boat, but now I was spiraling into all manner of offenses… only stopping with the possibly I’d killed his pet in a past life.

See? Crazy.

Alex pulled up to my house and turned off the truck. I slipped out of his jacket and set it on the console between us. “Thanks for dinner.”

“Hey.” He grabbed my hand. “Workin’ shit out, yeah?”

I nodded.

“Call you next week.”

I nodded again.

He tugged me forward, but I pulled away from him. “I’m not kissing you in front of my parents’ house, Alex. Not yet, anyway.”

“So, it’s fuckin’ payback time, huh?”

“What?” I snapped. “
No
.”

“Let me guess. Your dad would go ape-shit over you datin’ someone like me, right?”

“No, not at—”

“Fine, babe. We’ll do it your way.”

“
God
, you make me crazy.” I let out a frustrated growl. He moved to leave the truck but I pulled him back. “Wait. This conversation isn’t done.”

“No?”

“No,” I snapped. “I don’t want to kiss you in front of anyone until we know where we’re going with this. It has nothing to do with my dad. And for your information, my dad isn’t like that. He knows me enough to know that if I want to date someone, it’s my decision and he trusts me to make it. Brock, on the other hand…”

“Fuck,” he whispered.

“I’m gonna go.”

“Wait, babe.” Alex grabbed my hand. “I’m sorry.”

“Thank you.”

“You really not gonna kiss me?”

I couldn’t stop a giggle of relief as I shook my head. “Does it make you feel better to know I want to just as much as you do?”

“Doubtful,” he grumbled.

I squeezed his hand. “I’m sorry if I said something earlier.”

“You didn’t.”

“Yeah, the silent treatment the whole way home proved that.”