Rippled (15 page)

My paws clenched, and my claws dug at the thin layer of carpeting beneath our paws. “Run.”
To fuck you.
I kept the last part to myself. He’d already said sex was off limits while I was still learning and had reminded me again right before he’d made me shift.

Out of control.
But I was in control. I could hold on to one form or the other.

For how long?

I bowed my head. I’d probably consider myself lucky if I could keep from rippling for more than an hour at a time.

“Then we’ll run,” Brian decided, shifting back into human form. “Get dressed.”

My body rippled. Released. In less than a minute, I was human again. The pain was still gone.
For now.
I gathered my clothes and put them on one garment at a time.

“What about you?” I asked, nodding to his still very naked form.

He shook his head and moved towards the intercom. “I’m allowed to be in either form, remember?”

He had control. He wasn’t the one who was doped up all the time. I suddenly felt very stupid.

“Bathroom, please,” Brian spoke into the intercom, smiling back at me when the door unlocked. “Come on, we don’t have much time until they lock us back in again.”

Chapter Fourteen

Krista

As soon as we stepped outside, I wished we hadn’t. The hot flashes from before were gone, which made the cold outside even more unbearable. I immediately felt the pit of my stomach tie itself into knots, begging me to shift so I could stay warm. Granted, it probably would’ve helped if I’d worn a jacket, but I’d figured I’d be taking it off anyway.

I can wait.

I clenched my jaw when my teeth began to chatter, and my blood turned to ice when I realised we were headed right for Darien. He turned in our direction, and I hid behind Brian.

Krista, what the hell is your problem? You’ve seen him before.

Once, only once, and that wasn’t personal.

And this is?

I wasn’t sure.

“Why are you taking me to him? I mean, I know he helped back at the clinic and all, but do you really want him to see me…shift?” I asked, my voice barely audible as I clung to one of his arms.
Will he see me naked?

“What happened at the clinic wasn’t just a one-off and done. He’s a friend, and has been for a very long time,” Brian replied, looking back over his shoulder at me.

I gave Darien a tentative glance and slowed my pace. “Guards as friends? Isn’t that like an oxymoron or something?”

Brian rolled his eyes at me and reached out his hand, which Darien shook without hesitation. “Darien, I hope the night’s treating you well.”

“Might be,” Darien said, dipping his head in my direction before looking back at Brian.

Brian’s voice filled the air between us. “Look, you know I wouldn’t ask you to do this for me if I didn’t feel it would help.” He leant forward. “You hate the virus as much as I do. You want to get rid of it, don’t you?”

Darien waved over one of his companions, and I began to wonder if asking him for help was a good idea. “Yes.” Once the other guard was at his side, he asked, “What do you want us to do?”

“Turn a blind eye. We need to not be seen.”

“And then?”

“I’ll let you know.”

Darien nodded and excused himself, taking the other guard with him. I watched them go until they turned a corner before I looked back at Brian.

“What did you mean when you said you’ll let them know? Let them know what?”

“Darien and most of his men have been against the virus from the start.”

My vision swept across the camp grounds, studying the few guards I could see. “Most of them?”

“There are a handful who are still loyal to Malcom and his cause.”

“And the others? The ones who hate the virus? Why are they here?”

“Same as the rest of us. Money. They’re paid very well—”

“But we cannot stand by and let them drug more civilians.” Darien stepped up behind me, then nodded to Brian. “The back gate—there’s a nick in the line that Malcom shouldn’t notice. Be quick on your feet. It will be mended come morning. Be back before then if you want to save our heads.”

“So, wait, you’re allied with the guards?” I asked, dumbstruck.
Most of the guards,
I reminded myself.

“Darien and his followers are here to help us,” Brian replied.

I lifted my gaze at Darien. “Is that true?”

He smiled. “In any way that I can.” His gaze focused on something behind me before falling back to Brian. “But we’ve already wasted enough time here.”

Brian shook his hand before pulling him into a hug. “Thank you. You have no idea how much this—”

Darien waved a hand as if to dismiss whatever Brian was about to say. “Go. And may this overcast night protect you.”

And with that, Darien was gone. My thoughts of him and the other guards were interrupted when a chill ran down my spine. I’d been so interested in this new alliance, I’d completely forgotten about the cold. I flexed my hands, relieved when the digits hadn’t gone numb. Almost
—
but not quite there.

“Come on,” Brian said, taking my hand. “The gate’s this way.”

* * * *

The break in the fence line was mediocre at best. We’d have to wiggle beneath it if we wanted to get through.

You have two choices—climb over the top and fuck up your hands from the barbed wire or go underneath and get dirty.

Falling to my hands and knees, I started to crawl for the opening. I never made it.

Brian set a hand on my back. “Not like that,” he said, helping me to my feet. “Get undressed first.”

I frowned. “Here? Now? What about the cameras?” I gestured to the small lenses at the top of the fence line.

Brian knelt down and held up what appeared to be the electrical wires. “It seems Darien took care of those as well.”

The power lines had been severed. Whoever was manning the station wouldn’t see anything from these cameras, save for some static. Now I understood why Darien had given us the time limit. The nick in the fence could be overlooked, but cameras that were malfunctioning? They’d probably have a team out here to repair them as soon as it was light.

I fidgeted at Brian’s insistence. We might have been behind a building, but behind us? There was nothing to hide me, my clothes or my nakedness.

How else do you expect to crawl under the fence?

I studied the small gap, which now made complete sense. It wasn’t intended for a human to slip through.

You need to shift if you want to get out.
And God, did I ever need it. Just thinking about being outside these walls and able to run made my feet itch.

The anxiety in my stomach was nothing compared to the giddy high I felt swarming around my mind. I couldn’t remember a time when I’d been outside these gates, and that alone was both exciting and frightening. Deep down, I knew I’d been outside before, but not from my own memories. Brian claimed I’d come here just like the rest of them. I had to trust him.

He’s got you this far. Why not go the whole way?

“Hurry,” Brian whispered, gently guiding me up against one of the buildings. “Get out of your clothes and shift as quickly as you can.”

I reached for the buttons on my blouse, but I didn’t go any further than that.

“You know, unless you want to freeze to death out here,” Brian continued, nodding to my goosebump-covered skin.

I closed my eyes and undid the first button. When I didn’t melt to the ground from embarrassment, I undid another. Then another. Finally, after what seemed like hours, I was unclothed. Brian quickly hid my clothing beneath a nearby bush and shifted without saying a word. I waited to hear his command, the same one he’d used earlier, but either because he was still settling in his own skin or because of our recent circumstances, he didn’t say a damned thing.

And he didn’t have to, I realised. As soon as he glanced up at me, my skin rippled, and I knelt close to the ground. My shift was complete moments later with a slight twitch of nausea and a soft mew from my muzzle.

“Follow me, and stay close to the ground until I tell you it’s safe,” Brian rumbled, carefully slinking under the fence.

Getting as close to the ground as I could while still trying to learn how this new body worked, I managed to squeeze through the gap without getting my fur caught on the fence. Brian kept his stomach close to the ground, and I did the same as we slowly made our way from the camp. I lifted my gaze a handful of times, just to make sure he was still in front of me.

His tail was lowered, and I was pretty sure mine was as well, but I didn’t look back. If I did, I’d still be able to see the fence along with the rest of the camp. I didn’t want to look behind us until we were ready to return to the camp if I could help it. Besides, what was in front of us was a lot better compared to what we’d left behind.

“See that?” Brian asked, raising his muzzle to the stretch of mountains far ahead of us. “Wildcat Mountains.”

I wasn’t sure if I should be impressed, amused or if it was better just to roll my eyes. “Fitting.”

Of course, they were too far away for us to reach tonight, but it was amusing all the same. Even when the snow began to fall around us and the icy ground burnt my paws, I couldn’t help being taken aback by its beauty. Night vision was something I’d always wondered about, and now I could say I’d experienced it first-hand. It wasn’t like they’d said, though. You didn’t see night as day—it was just…lighter.

Squinting to protect my eyes from the snowflakes that swirled around us, I took it all in. The mountains were a panorama of beauty, without all the shit about the virus and how, of all things, we could shift into snow leopards. There was no judgement out there. No sides. Just two leopards running in the snow.

I wasn’t sure when Brian picked up the pace and lifted his tail, but there we were, romping around in open fields as if we didn’t have a care in the world. Nothing to go back to. No responsibilities outside of one another’s company and survival.

The ground crunched beneath my paws, and I bounded towards him, closing the space between us. My heart beat to the rhythm of our footsteps as I ran beside him. Quick and steady. Snow clung to my fur, but unlike when it caused my hair to become a knotted mess, I didn’t care. My fur kept me warm. The snow was just cool enough to make our run a comfortable one.

Taking in one deep breath after another, I watched as vapours passed through my parted lips. It was cold—
cold enough for snow—
but I didn’t feel it. As Brian led me across open plains to a cluster of rising hills, I began to think of what life would be like as a snow leopard. They were endangered, and they didn’t belong in Nebraska. If I could keep this life, would I?
Probably not.
All it would take was one disoriented traveller to find me, there in the snows of Nebraska, and that would be it.

Unless I wanted to relocate myself to Central Asia, the likelihood of keeping this skin full-time wasn’t possible at all.
Only if you want to get found out.
And a snow leopard anywhere in the United States—outside of a zoo—just wasn’t normal.

It never will be, so stop dreaming.

It wasn’t that I preferred my leopard skin over that of a human—it was because of the prison I was in when in my human form over the freedom I had now.

Brian’s working on getting that freedom back—you just have to be patient with him.

Now that it felt so close—now that I’d learnt how to shift and was running far outside the camp—I wanted it even more.

A rumble came from somewhere up ahead, and Brian slowed down. It took me a moment to realise the feral vocalisation had come from him. He turned to our left, carefully padding up a nearby slope so we could rest. When we were a few hundred feet up off the ground, he stopped, lying along the ledge of a seemingly small cliff, when compared to the mountains we’d never reach.

I took my place beside him and sprawled out on my stomach. The cool earth was comforting, and I drew in a lungful of air. It was thinner out here. Cleaner. Easier to think. My human mind was still active, but now I understood why we had to shift, how to control it and how it was as much a part of me as I was of it.

Shifting made me sane. It took the pain away. And until I could find a way to control the urges—the need to shift—I’d continue to do it.

Looking out over the plains that led back to the camp, I said, “So, about Darien.” I closed my eyes to shield them from the shifting snow. “Has he always…?”

“Been on our side?” Brian finished for me. “Pretty much. Neither one of us was ever comfortable with the situation, but it was controlled.”

“Until me,” I pointed out, watching a snowflake as it fell onto my nose.

“Exactly. And when Malcom planned on bringing in others after you to see if anyone else could react the way you did, that’s when we started to talk. Even more so after that poor woman—” Brian cut himself off, his eyes distant. “But we couldn’t work this out until you could handle shifting on your own. You aren’t there just yet, but it’s close enough for Darien and a few of his men to lend a hand.”

“Again, why wait? I’m sure they’d seen what’s been going on well before I arrived. What made them look the other way? Up until recently, I mean.”

“Same as me. Like it or not, this cage has protected us. If the public ever found out…” He shook his head. “We couldn’t risk it.”

“But you are now, when nothing about us has changed. We’ll still be able to shift.”

“Yes, but we have control over it now, and I cannot stomach another one of us dying to Malcom’s selfish studies. This isn’t a life for us. Hell, the guards are prisoners just as much as we are, even if a few of them don’t realise it yet. There’s no contact with the outside world. No email. No phone calls. Just letters, and even those are monitored by the DOD.”

“The DOD?” I knew he’d mentioned the government before, but I hadn’t realised just how far the virus, or news of it, had gone.