Authors: JJ Harper
My head is in a massive spin, too many images of Ryan in such dangerous life threatening situations. Would I have ever known if he had been killed? Who would have thought to tell me or to bother finding me?
I feel like a fraud, a fake for the moaning and whining I did about my problems, fuck I never had a gun constantly aimed at my head or dreaded every step for fear of a bomb lying underground waiting for my feet for months on end. I’ve never had to bury any of my friends. Maybe this is why he accepted my past so easily. He has learnt the fragility of life and to accept the past without letting it rule the future. To move on from things you aren’t able to control.
I was out walking red carpets and mixing with the rich and famous at the same time Ryan was fighting to make the world a safer place. What have I really got to offer him?
When I go back to the room I see my laptop on the table and Ryan leaning back with his head resting on the back of the sofa, his hands are covering his face. I can’t imagine him being that bothered about Troy and me messing about.
“Ry babe, what’s up? I promise we were just messing about. Nothing ever happened between us.” I put the two bottles on the table and turn the screen back to face me. Oh my fucking shit! How the hell did he find these? Photographs and videos of me and Ethan. “How the fuck did you find them?”
“Why are those on there, Nico?” Ryan’s eyes are still closed tight.
“I don’t know how they came up? I haven’t seen these for years.” I’m not going to explain this to a man that won’t look at me. “Ryan, look at me, let me explain.”
He lifts his head up and I can see tears in his eyes. “Why Nico, why have you got those on your computer? Did you want me to see them? Is that why you went out of the room?”
“No, no way. They were in a compressed zip folder with a password on it. I don’t know how you got to see them. I never wanted to see them again, and I as sure as fuck didn’t want you to. Will you let me explain?”
I watch as he looks hard at me checking to see if I’m telling him the truth.
“Okay, yeah tell me.” He still doesn’t look too happy.
“It was after Franco found me, he went after the men that attacked me, I don’t know how, but I had learnt that certain parts of Franco’s life were um, I think I’ll say shady. But he told me the less I knew the better. He managed to obtain all of the hard drives that had the original version of the films and photographs. His lawyers slammed them with restraining orders and shit that would stop them from ever reproducing or issues copies, he locked everything up so tightly that it would take probably the world’s best hackers to find it. I know because he used one of them to hide it in the first place.”
“How has nobody found out just by googling your name?” I know he is finding this unbelievable and I don’t know how to convince him.
“I didn’t use my own name Ryan, c’mon I wasn’t that stupid. I was called Brody Kent. Ethan wasn’t his real name so he didn’t change it, he was Ethan Clarke. It was silly, we were Clarke Kent. We really thought we were superman.” I shake my head at the stupidity, at how young and naïve we were.
“So what was Ethan’s real name, have you ever looked him up?” Ryan is still looking angry, I’m pretty sure he thinks I’m lying.
“I don’t know, he never told me. I have never looked for him after what he did to me, I’ll be happy to never see him again. I’ve managed for over seven years; I thought he might have come out of the woodwork when I started showing up in the papers but nothing. Franco ran a couple of checks and said he wasn’t going to be a threat and I believed him, Franco had never lied to me. I’m not lying to you Ryan, I will never lie to you. You have my word.”
I hold my hand out to touch him and he lifts his hand to touch mine, he clasps it and intertwines his fingers with mine. I pull him up from the sofa and against my body. Wrapping my arms around his neck I just hold him close, his hand reaches around my waist and he hooks his thumbs into the waistband of my shorts and we embrace silently. My hands reach up into his hair holding him closer still as he grip me tighter, my lips graze across his slowly, softly.
“I’m sorry Ryan, I never wanted you to see them. I will clear my hard drive, they can be deleted. I promise.”
“I know Nico, it was just a shock. Show me a picture of him just so as I know what he looks like. Preferably not one with your cock up his ass, if you don’t mind.” He actually chuckles a little at this.
“Are you sure, would you rather never see his face again?” I disentangle my hands from his hair sliding them down over his back to his hips.
“No, I want to see the man that caused you so much pain because if I ever set eyes on him I’m going to beat him to a fucking pulp.” His voice is low and calm and spine chilling in its menace.
“Baby, he’s not worth the effort. I doubt we will ever see or hear from him ever again.”
“Show me the fucking picture Nico.” He is still wound tight growling his words as he speaks
This time I don’t attempt to dissuade him. “Okay, hold on let me look.”
He stares at me for a second before moving away. It takes me just a couple of seconds to find a decent one. “Here you go Ry, this one is good.”
I wait anxiously as he turns and studies the image. Ethan looks good in this one, tall and strong. His blond hair and strong chiseled cheeks and jaw make him look the epitome of an American man. His perfect white teeth show as he grins a lazy, flirty smile, while his dark chocolate brown eyes sparkle. I remember how easy it was to love him, for a while I almost thought I did.
“Okay, I’m done.” Ryan walks away from the screen and out of the room.
It takes me a few minutes to send off a quick email to my computer whizz kid letting him know the file had been unlocked. I know he’ll get it checked out. I look once more at Ethan and then close him down.
I track Ryan down in the bathroom attached to his bedroom, I can see him through the steam standing in the large open shower as the water pounds down on his head, his eyes are shut and his hands are pressed against the tiled wall. I strip out of my clothes and step in behind him, I see him tense as he feels me but he doesn’t move. I run my hands over his shoulders and down his back but still there is no reaction, this scares me. I think we may have hit a real problem and I don’t know how to fix it.
Suddenly Ryan spins around trapping me against the opposite wall, his hands acting as a cage around my head his thighs and hips hard against my own. I daren’t breathe or make any movement as his forehead touches mine. His breathing is ragged, struggling to stay under control, his eyes bore into mine, I can see power, desire but most of all I can see ownership. He is claiming me, I submit to him raising my chin just slightly giving him access to my mouth.
His mouth smashes down on mine, consuming, devouring me. This is a new side of Ryan; I can understand the rage racing through his blood and muscles. This is the man that survived the war, that survived the rejection of his only family, and that survived my leaving. Fuck, this is the man I love.
“Turn around.” Ryan’s growl ignites my desire.
I let him take me, his teeth sink into my shoulders and neck, his fingers pull on my hips so hard that it will be sure to leave bruises. As he sinks his cock inside me I moan so hard that the tremors from it make my legs shake.
“Never again Nico, never a-fucking-gain. You are mine. Your past is over from now on. I’m the only person to touch you, to taste you, to tease and tempt you, to kiss and devour you. My dick is the only dick you will ever suck, fuck or be fucked with. Are you clear on that?” His words brush roughly over my ear before his teeth scrape over the tender flesh below my ear.
“Yes Ryan, this is it for us. We have each other, for now and forever.” I pant into his mouth as my head twists around to meet his mouth.
“Good to know, now brace yourself Nicky baby, this is going to be hard.” Resting his head between my shoulder blades for half a second before kissing my back and letting himself go. His hips pound harder and harder, I have to lean further forward as his angle changes, as his cock pounds relentlessly against my prostate my orgasm detonates from my body covering the wall and floor. As his hand grabs the base of my dick, he halts my climax.
“Fuck Ryan, no way let me finish.” The ache in my balls is killing me, making me desperate for relief.
“With me baby, come with me.” He picks up his rhythm again and it only takes a minute before he swells further inside me, he relaxes his hold on my dick and starts to match his thrusts with his hand pumping my cock hard. “Come with me babe, come now!”
As he let’s go of the base of my dick the last of my release screams from me, my balls high inside me bursting with pleasure.
“Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck” Ryan chants over and over as he empties himself inside me, I have never felt so full and satisfied. When his orgasm finally subsides he slides out of me and steps back under the hot water.
It takes me a while longer to compose myself, my legs are burning, my arms are shaking and my ass feels like it’s on fire. I won’t be sitting down anytime soon. Just as I feel ready to straighten up I feel Ryan’s hand run down my spine, I shiver under his touch. How can he affect me so much? I crave him.
“I’m sorry Nicky that was wrong of me. I shouldn’t have used you like that. I love you and seeing that guy made me mad. But I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.” He kisses my back. “I love you so much it frightens me.”
“Ryan, it’s okay. You didn’t use me, hell that was intense but a good intense, a really fucking good intense. I love you Ryan, I dumped a truckload of shit on you today more than I ever wanted you to have to deal with. Don’t negate the things you shared with me today, the loss of your friends in such horrific circumstances has weighed heavily on your conscience for a long time now. They would hate for you to be grieving and punishing yourself for surviving. They would want you to live and live well.”
This really makes him laugh but without humor. “You have no fucking idea Nicky.” He walks out of the shower and leaves me not any wiser. I quickly wash up we will need to get ready for tonight soon. We spent all of today going over our lives and later we have to go and put up with one hundred and fifty plus people. People we didn’t like much then so why would we now, plus they will all have their partners too. Then again I suppose we got on well with Marcus so there may be other surprises tonight.
I towel off and walk naked out of the bathroom to find Ryan lying in bed. “What are you doing babe?” I walk around to what seems to be my side of the bed and climb in next to him. “Why are we back in bed Ry?”
“I’m tired, it’s been a tough afternoon so I’m thinking of an hour’s nap before I go and wow the losers and has-beens. I doubt anyone else is turning up on the arm of a supermodel.”
“Fuck off Ryan, don’t say shit like that! It embarrasses me.” I lay my head on my pillow close to his. “Are you going to tell me what made you laugh so much? Or do I have to fuck it out of you?” I really hope he tells me because I really don’t think I’ve got another fuck in me.
“I suppose I have to. You see when you meet and make friends with people who you know will be protecting your life as much as you are theirs. You make some decisions that may or may not ever affect you. Well ours did, it affected me. We signed our wills stating that if any of us died then our estate would be shared amongst the survivors. We were all single and had no ties.” He pauses and I know where he’s going with this.
“No…” I stare at him open mouthed.
“Yeah, well only two of us survived. Me and Ben so it got shared between us, we had all made massive life insurance policies that were expensive because of our profession, but these policies are out there. So out of twelve guys Ben and I were the recipients of the wills. I doubt if I have as much money as you but I have more than I will ever need.”
“Why do you work?” I am still amazed at what he has just told me.
“What would I do if I didn’t work? I was alone and lonely so work was a good way of keeping myself busy.”
“Well fuck me, Ryan, I’m seriously speechless. It’s unbelievable.” I feel like I’m acting like a goldfish with my mouth just opening and closing. Luckily he takes pity on me and kisses me giving me something to do with my mouth.
“Well it’s true, but about the fucking you, I really don’t think I can. Not right now anyway.” His hand strokes down my face and I laugh.
“Come on babe, let’s get some sleep.” I wrap my arms around him and he tangles his legs with mine and it takes just moments before we fall sleep.
I think my body must be more accustomed to power naps, or combat-naps we would call them. It’s the ability to feel so much better after just an hour’s sleep. I’m lying down, watching Nico again, my mind is so much clearer now; I feel a sense of relief. I know there aren’t any more skeletons in our closets.
“You’re staring at me again lover-boy, cut it out.” Nico chuckles and opens his eyes.
“I knew if I did it for long enough you would feel it. Are you ready to go to the ball Cinderella?” I see him grimace and laugh at him.
“I’d rather we just stayed here. Who cares about seeing people we haven’t kept in touch with for a decade?”
“It’s what you came back for Nicky.” I stroke my hand down his cheek and he turns his head to kiss my fingertips.
“The hell it is, it was an excuse babe, that’s all. A kick up the ass if you’d like, I’ve wanted to come back to you from the second I walked away, and after losing Franco I knew I should at least try to see you. We’ve been over this Ryan.” He shakes his head and then swings his legs out of the bed. “And anyway, if anyone is going to be Cinderella it’s you. I want to be your Prince Charming.”
“Yeah right. You’re prettier than me.” I match him and we both stand up I stretch and my arms and legs creak, I look over at my man and see him rub his ass. “Oh baby, are you really sore?” I can’t keep the laughter out of my voice.
“Fuck off Princess, I’m going to get payback. So put your clothes on before I start right now.” He walks past me and lays a sharp smack on my ass.
“Ouch!” I rub my butt, smiling.
We scrub up well, I look at Ryan as we stand in front of the large mirror straightening our bow ties and our cuffs. We both have great bodies that carry a tuxedo perfectly.
“We are two fucking hot motherfuckers!” Ryan laughs and messes his hair for a couple more seconds.
“Come on, the cab will be here soon.” Ryan doesn’t know but I decided to go big and booked us a limo, I know it’s ridiculous but hey why not? We’re going to be talked about anyway.
The look on his face when he sees the limo is priceless; I manage to capture it on my cell much to his annoyance. But it’s okay, he laughs and we climb into the back.
“Have you been in a limo before Ry?” I watch him sit back and take a sip of his champagne.
“Hell yeah, loads of times. This is the sort of armored vehicle we used in Afghanistan every day.” His face is so deadpan I burst out laughing.
It takes only twenty minutes for us to reach the Marriott and suddenly we both look nervous. I smile before kissing Ryan gently.
“We don’t have to do this, we can go straight back to the house. It’s your call babe.” My thumb is rubbing circles over the back of his hand. I see resolve in his face and he straightens up.
“Fuck it! Come on baby let’s go and show them who we are.” He clasps my face in his face and plants a big smacker on my lips.
“Hell yeah!” We step out of the limo and walk past the groups of people standing at the entrance to the ballroom, we are holding hands but loosely, comfortably.
But then I stop and my vision goes black. Ryan has a hold of my arm now too and we both gasp.
We look to see Marcus walking towards us smiling holding firmly onto the hand of his husband Tate.
Fuck!!!
Part two coming soon
Reunited
Will Nico and Ryan manage to stay together, or will someone be coming between them?