“Hey, look at me.” Cooper’s fingers settled under my chin, and he raised my face so that I was looking at him. “You’re not weak, Claire. You never have been. You were forced into his life, and he took control before you even had a chance to stop him. He might think you’re weak, but you’re not. It’s time to prove just how strong you really are.”
“I’ll try,” I said as I looked into his eyes. “And you’ll be there with me every step of the way.”
“I will. I promise. We’ll get through all of this, unscathed.”
I hoped that was true.
I did as Cooper had said. I hadn’t tried to contact Robert for two days. I’d spent both days locked away in my room, willing my bruised and battered body to heal.
The first time I’d looked in the mirror, I’d started crying. I had known that my eye was swollen shut, but to know and to see it were two totally different things. I looked horrible. My eye was black, and my cheek was swollen. My ribs were just as bruised. I’d lifted my shirt and started crying harder. Cooper had barged into my room at the sound of my cries. He’d stopped dead when he saw the purple-and-blue color of my skin. He’d crossed the room in a flash and pulled me into his arms.
“I’m going to end this, Claire,” he’d whispered to me as I sobbed against his shirt.
I’d watched several of my foster mothers deal with abuse over the years. A few of my foster families had hit me as well, but I always sworn to myself that I would never willingly be with someone who hurt me that way. I’d let Robert fool me into thinking he was my savior. I should have known better. There had been so many signs, and I’d ignored them all. He’d taken over my life, controlled everything about me, and I’d let him. That made me weak, no matter what Cooper had said.
No more.
I was done being Robert’s pawn. It was time that I took back my life. It was time for Robert to pay.
On the third day after Robert’s attack, I decided it was time to go back to work. I spent so much time trying to cover the bruises on my face with makeup even though I knew it was a lost cause. Still, I tried. I managed to hide the worst of it, but anyone who looked at me would know I was sporting one hell of a black eye.
After finishing my hair and makeup, I dressed quickly and pulled a pair of sunglasses out of my purse. They would hide my eye outside, but I would be screwed once I made it to work. Wearing them would be even more noticeable than showing my eye to the world.
As I drove to work, I took several deep breaths to calm myself. I was on the verge of a panic attack from just the thought of seeing Robert again. The fact that I’d have to make him believe that I still wanted him made me physically ill. I wanted to turn the car around and run back to Cooper, but I knew I couldn’t. He had promised to help me in any way he could, but there was no way he could help or even hide me from what I was about to do. I would have to do it on my own. There was no other option.
I parked my car and walked into the firm with my head held high. I didn’t dare take off my sunglasses yet though. I knew I couldn’t face Robert if the whole office gawked at me as I walked toward his office.
When I walked past Gina, she greeted me with a warm smile. I smiled back, but I didn’t trust myself to even say good morning to her. I passed the elevator that would take me up to Becky’s office. Instead, I kept going. I needed to speak to Robert now before I decided that Cooper’s plan was a bad idea.
When I knocked on Robert’s door, I couldn’t help but hope that he wasn’t in. My heart sank when I heard him yell for me to come in. I took one last steadying breath before I swung his door open and walked inside. I closed the door behind me and turned to him.
His mouth hung open in shock as he stared at me. Obviously, he hadn’t expected me to show up here anytime soon. If it weren’t for Cooper’s plea, Robert’s assumption would have been right. I probably never would’ve set foot in this office again.
“Claire,” he said, his voice full of surprise.
“Robert,” I said as I crossed the room and sat down in one of the chairs directly across from him. The desk sat between us, serving as the only shield I had against him. It gave me comfort to know that something was there.
“I didn’t expect to see you here,” he said, his voice even. He’d obviously recovered from the shock of seeing me.
“We need to talk,” I said, wanting to get to the point so that I could escape him.
“We do. I’m just not sure where to begin.”
I closed my eyes for a moment and sent up a silent prayer that my attempt to make him believe I had forgiven him would work. If he believed me, I would deserve an award for actress of the year.
I’d spent the last two days planning on just what I would say and do. I willed my scripted tears to come to my eyes. It was surprisingly easy to make myself cry since I’d been crying on and off for the past two days.
I opened my eyes and looked at him through my tears. I watched his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed at the sight of my tears streaming down my face.
“What did I do to deserve this?” My voice broke, and I realized it wouldn’t be as hard as I’d thought it would be to show the emotions I needed. I was hurt. I was broken. “All I’ve ever done is love you, Robert. Why did you have to hurt me?”
He stood abruptly and walked around the desk. He knelt down next to me, and I forced myself not to move away.
“What I did is inexcusable, Claire. Words cannot express just how very sorry I am.”
“You hurt me, Robert. You hurt me so much.” I removed my sunglasses, and I was rewarded with a wince from him when he saw my eye.
“I never meant to, Claire. I was drunk and not thinking clearly. I was so enraged that I just lost control. You have to believe me when I say I would never do what I did under normal circumstances. I haven’t slept in days. I’ve just been thinking about what happened.”
“Then, why didn’t you come to me?” I asked.
His words had sounded so sincere that I wanted to believe him, just like I always had, but I knew better now. Robert hid his true self under a mask of sincerity and, at times, indifference. I wouldn’t let him fool me any longer.
“I didn’t think you wanted to see me.”
“I waited for you to come back! I
needed
you, Robert. I needed you to tell me how sorry you were. I wanted you there to take care of me. But you never came. You left me completely alone and broken.”
He grabbed my hand and lifted it to his lips. “If I had known, I would’ve been there in an instant. I love you, Claire, but what I did was barbaric. I can understand if you hate me now. I hate myself.”
“I don’t hate you, Robert. I love you. I just want to know what I did wrong to make you hate
me
,” I said, telling the biggest lie of my life.
I despised this man. I absolutely hated him. Any tenderness I’d felt for him disappeared when his foot became one with my rib cage.
“I love you, too. Please tell me what I can do to make this right,” Robert said as he gripped my hand tighter.
“Come home to me,” I whispered. “Come home, and be my husband. Show me how much you love me.”
He seemed startled by my words. “That’s what you really want?”
It wasn’t, not at all. What I wanted was for him to lay on the floor while I walked all over him with my three-inch spiked heels.
“It is. Please come back to me. We love each other, and I know we can make this work again. I don’t want to lose you.”
“Oh, Claire,” he said as he rose to his feet.
He pulled me up until I was standing next to him. I flinched and let out a muffled cry when he hugged me.
He instantly let go of me and stepped back. “What’s wrong?”
“My ribs are sore.” I gasped as I wrapped my arms around my middle, hoping to ease the pain even a little.
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t…I should have known…” he said, looking ashamed.
God, he was so convincing. I wanted to comfort
him
because he looked so upset.
“It doesn’t matter. I’m fine,” I said as I picked my purse up off the floor. “I need to get to work. You’ll be home later though, won’t you?”
He nodded. “I’ll be there. I promise.”
I walked to the door, shoving my sunglasses on my face as I went. “Good.”
When I opened the door, he called out, “Claire?”
I glanced over my shoulder at him.
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
Lies, so many lies.
And they would only grow.
“What’s with the glasses?” Becky asked when I sat down across from her.
I shrugged. “My head is killing me, and the lighting makes it worse. I thought I’d try wearing them to see if it would help.”
She gave me a sympathetic look. “I heard you were sick. If you’re still recovering, you could have stayed home. The filing can wait another day even though I’m sure you’re
super
excited to get back down to the basement.”
“Oh, yes, I spent my time at home pining away for the filing system downstairs. I might have even shed a few tears.”
Becky chuckled. “You’re ridiculous, my dear. So, how are you really feeling?”
“I’m okay. Just exhausted. Being…sick sucks, but I’m glad to be back.”
“Well, I’m glad to have you back as well. With that being said, get your tiny butt downstairs and start filing away. Also, you can take this massive stack”—she gestured to a large stack of files sitting on the edge of her desk—“downstairs with you.”
“Oh, goodie. Thanks so much.” I stood up. “You’re the best boss ever.”
She laughed. “I know.”
I smirked as I reached for the folders. There were so many that the stack had to be nearly a foot tall. As soon as I lifted them, pain sliced through my ribs. I let out a cry as I dropped them. I watched in horror as they fell to the floor, and papers scattered around. Becky jumped out of her chair and came around the desk to where I was standing, bent over and clutching my ribs.
“Are you okay?” she asked as she tried to help me stand upright.
Her hand pressed against my ribs, and I jerked away. She froze.
“Claire, lift your shirt up for me.”
I gave her a look that said I thought she was crazy. Inside, I was freaking out. If she saw my ribs, she would know that something had happened, something bad. I couldn’t let her see. If she told anyone or went to Robert, I would be screwed.
“I’m fine,” I said as I stepped back, hoping to put more space between us.
But I had no such luck. She moved with me. Before I could stop her, she grabbed my shirt and pulled it up until the bottom of my ribs was exposed. I knew the moment she saw the bruises. She sucked in a sharp breath and pulled my shirt up further.
“Oh my god,” she whispered as she let my shirt fall back down.
I watched as she lifted a shaky hand to my face. I winced as she pulled my sunglasses off my face.
“Claire, holy fuck!”
I gave her a pleading look. “I fell down the stairs at home. That’s why I haven’t been at work. Please don’t make a big deal out of this.”
“You didn’t
fall
, Claire. I’m not a fool. He did this to you, didn’t he?”
“Who?” I asked as I snatched my glasses back and put them on again.
“Robert. He did this. He was so angry the other day, and then you come to work like this. He hurt you!”