Retreat From Love (41 page)

I’m sorry to burden you, Freddy, with all this. The scapegrace brother who never had time
for you. But I remember how sweet you were as a boy, how eager you were to please everyone. I
hope that you remain thus, and will look kindly on my last requests.

I shall miss getting to see you become a man most of all, I think.

With brotherly love,

Bertie

* * * * *

Anne jumped up out of her chair and pointed at Brett accusingly. “What the devil am I doing? What the devil are you doing?”

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Brett put his hands on his hips and glared at her. “Meaning what? I am not here about to accept another man’s proposal.”

Anne threw her arms in the air. “Oh no! Of course you wouldn’t accept his

proposal! Because Brett Haversham loves no one, and no one is allowed to love Brett Haversham.”

“What does that mean?” Brett shouted. “I love you. Of course I love you. Do you think I would have done the things I’ve done if I didn’t love you? I already told you I love you.”

Freddy just sat there and stared. He’d never seen either one of them really angry before. And he wasn’t entirely sure what they were angry about now.

“The things you’ve done? Such as what? Made love to me? Made love to me with Freddy? You’ll have to be more specific. Because it seems to me we did those things before you reluctantly admitted that yes, you were in love with me, and then promptly looked as if you might cast up your accounts at the thought of marrying me.”

Well, Freddy did have to concede that she had a point. “She does make a good point, Brett.”

Brett turned his glare on Freddy, and so did Anne. She pointed at Freddy

accusingly and he wished he’d kept his mouth shut.

“Oh no. Don’t you go taking my side in this affair, Your Grace.” She sneered the title at him. “Your mother insults me, accosts me in front of strangers, and I get a kiss on the cheek and a fare thee well? Where have you been for the last two days?”

“You wouldn’t see us for the last two days,” Brett ground out, “and I’d like to know why.”

Anne folded her arms across her chest belligerently. “That is none of your affair.”

Brett stomped across the room and grabbed Anne’s arm, spinning her to face him.

“It damn well is our affair when it drives you into another man’s arms.”

“Ohhh,” Anne growled. “You had to throw that back in my face. You think just because I wasn’t some pristine little virgin sacrifice that I’ll toss up my skirts for any crippled soldier that comes along?”

Brett stumbled back as if he’d been slapped. “Is that how you see me?”

Anne promptly threw herself down on the sofa and burst into tears. “No! You’re right! I’m no good, can’t you see? What happened with the duchess will only happen again and again. I can’t stay with you. I can’t!” She fell over and buried her face in her arm on the sofa cushion and wailed.

Freddy slid off his chair and kneeled on the floor next to Anne. He smoothed her hair and then rubbed her back. “Anne, darling,” he said softly, “nothing could be further than the truth. You are the best thing to ever happen to us, you must know that.”

“Of course I know that,” she mumbled from the crook of her arm. “I am having histrionics because you abandoned me and I haven’t slept for two days. I am an idiot 209

Samantha Kane

and I am being totally unreasonable.” She hiccupped and sat up, and Freddy smiled and offered her his handkerchief. She blew her nose and looked at him out of watery eyes. “Good Lord, Freddy, you look awful. What on earth have you been doing?”

Brett started to laugh. He laughed so hard he had to sit down. He fell onto the sofa next to Anne and yanked her into his arms, still laughing. Freddy couldn’t help but laugh with him. He sat on the floor and leaned his forehead in Anne’s lap and laughed at the absurdity of it all.

When he finally calmed down he looked up to see Anne smiling tentatively. “Have I missed the joke?”

Freddy shook his head and kissed her hand. “Oh Anne, I’ve spent the last two days in hell, and Brett had to face the devil and pull me out.”

“What?” Anne was adorable when she was confused.

Freddy closed his eyes and put her hand to his cheek, rubbing against it, turning it to kiss her palm. “I thought I’d lost you,” he whispered.

Anne cupped his face and leaned down to kiss him gently. “Oh Freddy, even

though I know it’s the right thing to do, I can’t leave you. I just can’t.”

Brett sighed next to them. “I believe it is time for some honesty.” He looked at Anne and Freddy. “And I shall go first. Anne, I have loved you almost since the first letter from you that Bertie read to me. I lived for your letters, Anne. I loved your wit, and your sense of humor, and your good nature, and your practicality, and your loyalty. I loved that you wrote a sonnet to your dead cat, and hated gardening, and embroidered a handkerchief for me. But you were Bertie’s. And after he died…I couldn’t, Anne.”

Anne was sitting there with a stunned look on her face. Brett fumbled in his jacket and pulled a well-worn piece of linen out. He kissed it, and then shook it out, and Freddy could see that it had Brett’s initials embroidered on it, with some ivy leaves and flowers. The handkerchief both he and Bertie had written about. Brett still carried it.

Anne touched it with shaking fingers.

“I love you now, Anne, because you have helped me learn to live again. Because you made me remember those feelings, and so many more. There is a life in you that won’t be tamed, or knocked down, or worn out. I want to laugh with you, Anne, and love you for the rest of my life. And I believe Bertie would have wanted that for us.”

Anne had covered her mouth with her hand, and tears streamed from her eyes.

Brett gently dabbed the tears away with the handkerchief she’d made for him so many years ago.

“Oh Brett,” she whispered as she clutched his wrist with her hand. “Yes, yes, darling, I love you too.”

“Why?” he whispered back. “I don’t understand why. I am more grateful than I can say, but I don’t know why you would love me.” His look was genuinely perplexed. He glanced down at Freddy. “Either of you. I have been a thoughtless, cruel idiot for years, and yet you both love me. Why?”

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Anne looked down at Freddy and gave him a small, secret smile as she brushed a hand over his hair, and in that moment they shared something most profound. Yes, he loved Anne, and he knew she loved him, but it was in loving this man that they truly became one. How could he explain that to Brett? It might take a lifetime.

Freddy took a deep breath and then he reached out for Brett’s hand. Without hesitation Brett gave it to him, lacing their fingers together. Freddy heard Anne gasp and then a little sob came out and she hugged Brett tightly.

“I will not argue that you have been an idiot,” Freddy told him with a smile. “But can you honestly not see what we see, Brett?”

Anne shook her head and pulled away from Brett, taking the handkerchief from him and wiping her eyes again. “No, he doesn’t, Freddy. And isn’t that part of his charm?”

“What?” Brett demanded a little desperately. “What do you see?”

“Oh Brett,” Anne told him, cupping his cheek for a moment. “You wear the

problems of the world on your shoulders. You think of everyone before you think of yourself. You think you don’t need anyone, but the truth is you
need
us. No one has ever needed me like you, Brett.”

Freddy closed his eyes and nodded in relief. Yes, Anne understood. He opened his eyes to see Brett looking at him in astonishment. “She’s right, Brett. When I got the letter from Stephen telling me that you were arriving, terribly injured, and that you were Bertie’s best friend but had no family of your own, I thought, ‘And? What am I supposed to do?’ Jerome had only just died, weeks after Bertie, I suddenly found myself in a position I’d never imagined would be mine, and now someone was foisting this injured stranger on me. I had nothing to do, and everything to do, and I didn’t know where to start. So I went to Dover.” Freddy rolled to his feet and took a seat on Anne’s other side, turning to face them both. “I got there, and there you were. Out of your head with fever, ranting and raving about Bertie. And suddenly the reality of Bertie’s death was too much. But you
needed
me, Brett. No one had ever needed me before, and they didn’t then either. I’d pretty much been told the estates and title would take care of themselves and not to worry my pretty head about them, and I was feeling useless and immature, and generally guilty that I’d become duke. But suddenly I had someone to take care of. You made me feel useful and…” He sighed. “You made me grow up, Brett.” He looked at Brett, willing him to understand. “And even as you’ve taken care of me over the years, you’ve never stopped needing me. We have taken care of each other, and I cannot imagine my life without you.”

“Freddy,” Brett choked out, reaching across Anne to grip Freddy’s nape in his big hand. “I do need you,” he whispered, looking between Freddy and Anne. “I need you both desperately.”

“Oh Brett,” Anne said, leaning forward to rest her forehead on the side of his head.

She rubbed against him. “I need you too.” She turned her head to smile at Freddy.

“Both of you.”

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And it seemed the most natural thing in the world to lean in, to meet both Brett’s and Anne’s lips at the same time. The kiss was awkward, and he ended up bumping his nose on Brett’s. They all pulled apart laughing.

“Yes, well, we’ll have to practice that a little more,” Freddy said lightly, and Brett’s grin was eager and lascivious, two things Freddy never thought he’d see.

“A little?” Anne asked in mock surprise. “I should think a lot. That was awful.”

“It was not awful,” Freddy protested. “It was sweet and wonderful.”

“Needs a lot of practice,” Brett said. Then he started laughing and Anne joined him.

Freddy smiled. “True.” He sighed in exaggerated resignation. “I suppose you two will keep me at my lessons all night and day.”

“Mmm hmm,” Anne hummed as she leaned in and nibbled on Freddy’s earlobe.

Brett kissed him on the sensitive spot right behind his other ear as he hummed his agreement, and Freddy was in heaven.

They were interrupted by a knock on the door, and without waiting for an answer Borden poked his head in. They didn’t jump apart. Brett looked over his shoulder at Borden, and then slowly sat back, while Anne rested her head on Freddy’s shoulder.

“Um, just thought I’d pop in and make sure everything is all right,” Borden said with false cheerfulness. “We heard some yelling, and then some crying.” He peered closely at Anne’s and Freddy’s red-rimmed eyes. “Did someone die?”

Brett turned back to both of them and met their glances one at a time. “No,” he answered. “Someone just started living again.”

“Freddy,” Brett moaned as he felt Freddy slide inside him again, slow and deep.

Anne was beneath him, cradling him between her thighs, her hot, slick walls wrapped tight around his cock. It was too much, he wouldn’t last. On the way home from North’s, when he’d finally managed to ask them, after a great deal of hedging and roundabout conversation, for this, to be fucked by the two of them, he hadn’t realized how intense it would be. He shook his head, breathing heavily, trying to make it last.

“Does it feel good, Brett?” Freddy whispered behind him, his hands sliding down Brett’s sweat-slick back from rump to nape. Brett shivered and moaned. Freddy wrapped his hands over Brett’s shoulders one finger at a time, grinding his cock inside, forcing Brett’s cock into Anne. Then Freddy draped his chest and stomach along Brett’s back and buttocks, all that slick, hot skin pressed to his, Freddy’s nipples hard little spikes against him. Brett braced his forearms on the bed, holding his weight and Freddy’s off of Anne. She smiled up at him, looking as satisfied as a cat with a mouth full of cream. She clenched her thighs around his hips, and then her inner walls followed, one pulse, two. Brett made a low-pitched sound between a cry and a whimper.

Freddy licked the skin just below the curl of Brett’s sweat-drenched hair along his nape and Brett’s toes curled. Christ, Freddy was good in bed. He was an inventive and 212

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sensual lover. He liked everything—the taste, the touch, the smell—of his lovers. He made you feel savored and treasured, and so god damned good. Brett tried to focus on individual things, thoughts and sensations, trying not to be overwhelmed by the whole.

But he was failing miserably.

Anne slid her hand up from Brett’s stomach to his chest, and then she pinched one of Brett’s nipples, softly at first but increasing the pressure until Brett had to bite his lip to keep from crying out at the sharp sting of pleasure. Anne released his nipple and then rose until her weight rested on her arms behind her. She leaned in and licked Brett’s nipple, a long, slow lick with the flat of her tongue. Then she teased the hard point with the tip of her tongue. “Anne,” he groaned. Had he just been thinking what a marvelous lover Freddy was? Anne was more than his match. And Brett was caught between the two of them.

Freddy’s hand slid up into Brett’s hair as Freddy pulled out and slid off his back.

Suddenly Freddy’s fist tightened in his hair, and Brett’s head instinctively jerked back to relieve the pressure. Freddy’s other hand gripped Brett’s hip as Freddy teased Brett’s hole with his cock. “You never told me why you love me, Brett,” Freddy said quietly. “I know you do, but why? Tell me what you love.” Brett groaned and thrust back against that teasing cock. Freddy slapped Brett’s bottom, and the sting was so unexpected, so sharp and sweet, that Brett jerked and moaned. “Tell me.” Freddy pushed into Brett then, and when the head of his cock breached his tight ring Brett cried out.

Anne lay back beneath him and thrust her hips up as Freddy bore down. Brett tried to focus his thoughts, to answer Freddy, but he couldn’t. He could only feel.

Anne slid her hands up Brett’s arms, over his straining muscles, and cupped his jaw. “Is it too much, Brett?” she whispered. “I know. I know how it feels to be loved by both of you. It was almost too much.”