Resist (London) (17 page)

If was written all over her face that she hadn’t even considered that. I stared at her as her face ran through multiple different emotions. Confusion, anger, guilty, and finally, she settled on defiance.

“It’s not like that. I’m not asking for anything. You’re always asking too much of me.”

“That’s not true and you know it. You’re not asking for anything? You’re asking me to go against everything I want! I want you all to myself. I want to spoil you with gifts. I don’t just want to fuck you, I want to make-love to you. So I agree to let that all that go, and you can’t even give up fucking other random guys who don’t give one...single...
fuck
about you? Really Harper, is it me that’s asking too much?”

Before she could answer, spitting venom at me, I slammed my mouth down on hers.

She wanted to fuck? I’d give her just that.

I devoured her mouth with my tongue. Stroking, sucking,
biting. In an instant, she was responding to me, just like always. She kissed me with the same amount of force. It wasn’t seductive or beautiful. This was carnal. A fight for control. A kiss so punishing that we were both panting and grinding, desperate for relief.

I knew what I wanted though, and I was gonna get it. I ran my hands across her stomach, lifted myself and pushed her trousers down her hips. She wriggled slightly, just enough so that she could kick them off.

When she was completely bared to me, I took the time to just stare at her. God, even her pussy was pretty. Pretty and pink. Glistening with arousal. I wanted inside her so damn badly. I was aching for it.

But I wanted to tease her a bit, show her what she had been doing to me every fucking day for three months! I ran one finger between her folds and shivered at her loud moan. I flicked my finger back and
forwards, excruciatingly slow. Then I added another, still keeping the steady rhythm, driving her crazy.

She was writhing, hips gyrating, pleading with her whimpers, but I didn’t speed up and I didn’t press harder. I wanted her begging for it. So damn slowly, I pushed one finger inside her, then another. My fingers were coated with her wetness and my dick was screaming at me for attention, but this was my show.

“Mason
please
.”

“Please what, Sunshine? What do you want?”

“I want, I don’t, Mason I don’t know! I just need something. More? I don’t know but
please
!”

As soon as she finished speaking, I rammed my fingers inside of her, hard and fast. I added a third and twisted. I loved her sexy little whimpers, they made me want to spend all day buried inside of her. As I felt her start to tighten around my fingers, I pulled away, ignoring her cries of protest.

I pulled a condom from my wallet, then released myself from my jeans and rolled it on. The game was supposed to go on for longer than that, but I just couldn’t take it anymore. I felt like I needed to be inside of her, more than I needed to breathe.

Harper

My orgasm slipped away when he removed his hands and I couldn’t prevent the pleading cries that left my mouth.

Before I could even process what he was doing, he slammed into me. Rough, hard...possessive almost. I clung to him, trying so desperately not to scream from the pleasure. That doesn’t really happen, the screaming, it’s just something you read about in books or watch on porn. It’s fake. At least I always thought it was. Until right then, being pounded into so damn hard that it felt like he was trying to climb inside me. I ran my tongue along sheen of sweat beading across his skin and clenched when he growled in response. It was so wild, so powerful and so fucking perfect.

I could feel myself building again and I was desperately searching for it, tipping my hips up to meet his every thrust. I knew he was close too because his strokes were becoming quicker and more erratic. I felt him stiffen above me and prayed, begged that I got finish too.

That did not happen.

Mother...fucker.

He thrust into me one last time, groaned, buried his face in my neck and just...stopped. My internal ache had developed into a fucking inferno, and he stopped! I felt my impending orgasm slip away from me
again
as he pulled out and rolled off me. I was so damn confused. Okay, so I’d only been with Mase a handful of times, but every single time he made sure I got mine first.

What the fuck?

He knifed out of bed, threw on his jeans and seeing as he didn’t even bother to remove his shirt, he had already gotten fully dressed by the time I managed to speak.

“Mase?
Wha...?” I didn’t even get to finish.

Again!

He leant over, gave me a swift peck to the forehead and muttered, “Call ya another time Sunshine.” Before turning and walking straight out the door.

Seriously?
What the actual fuck?

For the first time, ever, in my entire life.
I felt cheap. Used. Dirty. I just felt, well, like a fucking whore. I hated everything about myself in that moment. I wanted to cry. I wanted to mope. I wanted to understand what the hell had happened.

I didn’t do any of that though. I got mad.
Really fucking mad. Spitting venom, breathing fire, growing horns...I was ready to commit bloody murder.

And every last shred of my
anger, was directed at Mason
fucking
Brent.

Mason

So I’m a bastard. Yep. I won’t argue with that.

She needed a lesson and she fucking learnt it. That was a fuck. Quick, dirty and most the time, if a guy is just out to fuck a woman, he doesn’t care whether she gets off or not. So I played a part. I was acting. I hated myself for doing it, but it also needed to be done.

Even though I left, I didn’t go far. Actually I didn’t go anywhere. I slammed the door shut, and sat, with my head buried in my hands, resting against the other side. I really did feel like a grade A bastard. No, worse, I felt like a grade A fucking cunt.

I sat there for no more than about two minutes when the door swung open. I couldn’t steady myself in time to stop my fall and crashed back on to my elbows. I looked up with a frown, into the face of one very,
very
pissed off girl.

I jumped to my feet, silently cursing myself for not getting out of there quicker.

“What the fuck are you still doing here?” She asked, throwing her hands on her hips.

“
Ermmm...” Yeah, I was stuck. I didn’t know myself what I was still doing there, it wasn’t part of the plan. So if I couldn’t tell myself, then I couldn’t tell her!

“
Ermmm...” She mimicked, then pissed me even more. “Just fuck off Mason. The only reason I wanted to spend time with you at all was because you were a decent fuck, and today you couldn’t even be that. I have no use for you anymore. Just...fuck...off. I hate you.”

Well. She was lying through her
teeth, that was plain to see. She didn’t want me to fuck off, she wanted her orgasm. Badly.

My poor baby.

Now, yes I should have apologised, took her back inside and made love to her properly. But apparently I’d had a brain-to-mouth malfunction, because I didn’t do that.

“Doesn’t feel nice
does it? Getting
fucked.
” I sneered.

Shit!

She reared back as if I’d slapped her and I couldn’t hide my wince. Seeing this obvious sign of weakness, she went in for the kill.

“Really?
That’s what you were doing?
Fucking
me?...” She began softly. I’d never heard that voice from her, it was almost childlike and I won’t lie, it scared me.

“Because to me Mase, it seemed like you were trying to teach me a lesson. You think I couldn’t feel that? You might have screwed me over, but you also did it to yourself. You are not
that
guy. You’re a good guy, or I thought you were. I don’t even know who you were in there...” She threw her arm out in the direction of the bedroom and then finished. “But do you know what’s even worse? Now you really are just one of them. You’re just another number, another notch on my bed post. I hated fucking most of them, and just now? I hated being fucked by you too.”

I gave it one last try, for the sake of it.

“Then tell me. Tell me why I
know
you want more. More than being treated like a common slut, more than forgetting the name of most men you sleep with. Come on Harper, tell me!”

Her silence told me all I needed to know. I had to give her up. It was just too fucking messy, and I didn’t wanna keep going round in circles. I was acting like someone I didn’t even recognise and really, I was just making things worse.

“Sunshine…” I closed my eyes and prayed what I was about to say would come out how I wanted it to. “I just, I can’t do this anymore. Every fucking day, you’re breaking my heart just a little bit more. I’m so damn sick of being your little lap dog and I’m not doing that anymore. You don’t want me around? Well babe, you’ve finally got your wish. I’m done. You know...I love you” I ignored the look of shock that crossed her face, because in all honesty, she shouldn’t have been shocked by my admission. I had shown her often enough. I continued, “and no matter how much I wish I could, you can’t choose who you fall in love with. But I’m a fucking guy! A good guy, and I don’t deserve this shit. What haven’t I done for you? Huh?”

Clearly, she didn’t have an answer, so I continued.

“We don’t laugh anymore, I don’t get excited to see you anymore, and if we’re not fucking, then we don’t work. I’m not happy, and I know you’re not either. If neither of us is happy, and we’re not going anywhere, then is there really any point? No, there isn’t. No more games Sunshine, I’m out. Maybe one day, you’ll find that guy. The one who really does make you let go of those chains, the one who’ll make you fall in love and understand that all those bullshit rules of yours are just that. Bullshit. It might have taken a while to realise, but I’m just not that guy.”

I completely hated the look in her eyes. It was just empty. She was usually so expressive, so fiery. None of that was evident.

“Do you know what it’s like to live in chains?”

She’d asked that before. But h
er question still took me off guard and it took me a second to answer. Although even when I did, it wasn’t really an answer.

“I...
erm, what? I guess not. I don’t really understand the question”

“Chains.
Control. Restriction. All of it. I had that, for sixteen years of my life Mason, I’ve told you that. I know what you’ve been through. You never told me though did you? No, Taylor did. It must have been torture. I can’t even imagine. But you don’t think my life was just as much torture all the same? Different circumstances yeah, I get that. This was emotional torture. It’s fucking hard to break free of that, but I did it. I pay my own way, I do my own thing and I don’t live by anyone else’s rules. I’m not down playing what you’ve been through, I know it was worse. And I’ll openly admit that you’re a stronger person than I am for getting through that. So don’t use it against me that I can’t do the same thing Mason. You don’t have a clue what it was like, so don’t pretend you do.”

There was a hell of a lot to get pissed off at during her little speech, but instead of saying something I might regret, I stayed silent. She rode it for about three seconds before speaking again.

“My parents were
not just
strict. I’ll never be able to explain it to you so I’m not going to waste my time trying to. All you have to know is that I’ve all that shit before, and really, you need to grow up Mason. You’re playin...”

Fuck this.

Harper

“WHO FUCKING CARES!!!!”
He roared,
right...in...my...face!

I stumbled back slightly, feeling like he’d delivered a punch to my stomach
, because in all honesty, he may as well have struck me. How could he?

How fucking could he?

I was fuming. Everything I’ve been through, I try and lay it out for him thinking maybe,
finally
he’d understand and give me a break, but no he reduced it to the fact that no one fucking cares?

What the fuck?

“
What?!”
I hissed, my voice breaking slightly in anger.

“That’s right
Sunshine...
” Normally when he called me Sunshine, it was almost an endearment, an inside joke, togetherness, but not that time.

Nope.

It was said with venom. Like a knife to heart, said to
hurt.
But he wasn’t finished with me, he went further, sinking the knife right in and twisting it, ensuring those wounds cut deep.

“No one gives a
fuck.
I definitely don’t. You’ve got issues yeah, but they don’t come from your parents...no...That’s wrong. It
may
have started with them, but since then? It’s
all
you. You’re just a bitch, playing at being an adult when you’re really just a lost little girl. So what if you had
strict
parents! Have you heard yourself? Telling me to grow up, like you’re better than me? You need to take a fucking long hard look in the mirror Harper. I’m sick of your shit. I’ve spent the last few
months
being your fucking whipping boy, well not anymore. Screw you. Be a bitch for all I care...”