Red Zone: Boys of Fall (17 page)

It was a beautiful offering. Her orgasm struck hard and, finally, Joel was there with her. He pulled out at the last second, his come landing on her back in hot spurts.

Then Oakley filled the void. Only when his climax—and her gazillionth—came, he stayed inside her. There was something perversely fulfilling about allowing them to take her without condoms, to come inside her when she’d never given anyone else that privilege. Some nights, she’d hold off on showering for a little while after they left her bed, simply marveling at the sticky reminder of what they’d done together.

She closed her eyes, pressing her head against the slick wood of the table beneath her. Sadie couldn’t look at them, couldn’t face her lovers and see what she knew was there.

Love.

No.

She’d simply keep her eyes—and her heart—closed. She could do this.

She had to do this.

Joel leaned against a stall in the barn to take a breather. He’d woken up this morning with a smile on his face. A big one. Last night had blown his mind. And then some.

He hadn’t anticipated how much he’d love the touch of another man on him. The memory of that experience alone would probably keep him hard for weeks, but when paired with the sight of Sadie, bound to the table, writhing in pleasure as their submissive captive, Joel found his knees going weak with need.

He ran a hand over his growing erection and tried to think of something less dangerous to his libido. There were too many hours to go between quitting time and climaxing.

They’d convinced Sadie to let them take her out on a real date tonight. Of course, they hadn’t worded it that way. After they’d untied her, they’d taken turns cuddling with her, and then Oakley had said he wanted to buy her a big-ass steak dinner.

Sadie had laughed, but Oakley hadn’t backed down. When she tried to reason with him about it being unwise for the three of them to be seen together too much in public, she’d tweaked Joel’s stubborn streak. He’d thrown his support behind Oakley and after a few minutes of verbal—and physical—persuasion, she’d relented.

Joel glanced across the barn. Oakley was cutting boards with a table saw. He’d taken off his shirt, unwilling to see the clean cotton covered in sawdust. Joel took several moments to enjoy the sight of Oakley’s muscular back as he ran each board over the saw. He had never found himself attracted to the male form before. Now he wondered how he’d been so blind.

Joel’s head reeled over his friend’s kisses, the blowjob, the unexpected pleasure he’d found in Oakley’s touch. It was all so new, and while there were still parts of the intimacy they’d left unexplored, Joel couldn’t deny he enjoyed being with Oakley every bit as much as he did Sadie.

So much for being straight.

He chuckled to himself, then crossed the barn, hoping to build on last’s night’s adventure. When he walked up beside Oakley, his friend turned off the saw, obviously thinking Joel needed to ask him something. The sudden silence after the loud roaring noise of the saw was instant.

“What’s up?” Oakley asked.

Joel gave him a wicked grin and pointed at his crotch. “This.”

Oakley’s brow rose in approval, his grin growing wide.

Unable to resist touching him, Joel wrapped a strong hand around the back of Oakley’s neck and pulled him toward him for a kiss.

Oakley didn’t hesitate and didn’t pretend he wasn’t just as hungry for Joel. Their lips parted and the kiss went from lukewarm to sweltering in seconds. Things probably would have escalated very quickly from there if not for the female gasp coming from the barn door.

He and Oakley jerked apart and for a split second, Joel expected to see Lorelie.

Instead, he found himself gazing into the horrified eyes of his mother.

“Oh shit. Mom,” Joel said, his stomach clenching tightly.

She slowly raised her hand, the trembling painful for Joel to watch. “You left your jacket at my house on Sunday.” She placed the leather coat on a shelf near the door, and then turned and walked away without another word.

Joel started after her, Oakley’s apology following him.

“God, Joel. I’m so sorry.”

“No, Oak,” he said over his shoulder. “Don’t. Don’t apologize.”

He didn’t say anything more as he raced across the front yard. His mother was nearly running to her car. Obviously the sound of the saw had prevented him from hearing her arrival. He caught her just as she reached for the door.

“Wait. Mom. Please. Just wait.”

Mom looked at her car door, not turning to face him. “I think it would be best for both of us if I left right now.”

“You can’t leave like this. I can see you’re upset. If you could just let me explain—”

Her head shook violently back and forth. “No. No no no no no no no no no.”

Joel ran a hand through his hair, wishing there was something he could say to make this better for her. In the end, he couldn’t offer her anything more than the truth. “Mom. We have to talk about this. You saw me kissing Oakley.”

She whirled on him when he said Oakley’s name. “It’s that man’s fault, isn’t it? What has he done to you?” She stepped closer to look at his eyes as if he were delusional or sick. “Are you on drugs? Did he get you high?”

Joel sucked in a deep breath, determined to remain calm, though her questions pissed him off. “No. He didn’t. Jesus, Mom—”

“Don’t take the Lord’s name in vain!”

Joel closed his mouth and counted to ten in his head. Talking to his mom when she was upset was never easy. It was one of the reasons Joel had always attempted to toe the line, to keep the peace. It helped him preserve his sanity.

“
Why
, Joel? This isn’t you. I didn’t raise you to…”

“To what, Mom? Fall in love with a man?”

Her eyes widened. “You’re not in love with him. You can’t be!
The Bible
—”

“Stop.” Joel raised his hand. “Stop right there. You’re not throwing
The Bible
in my face as a way of justifying something
you
can’t understand.”

Mom’s shoulders slumped. “You were a good man before he came here. You went to church, you prayed.” She looked at his bruised face. “You didn’t get into fights and you didn’t get drunk.”

That last wasn’t true and she knew it, but she was grasping for anything she could, desperate to make Oakley the villain in all of this.

“You can’t blame Oakley for any of that. I’m a grown man and I make my own choices.”

“You’ve always been a
good
man, Joel. Respectful, polite, kind, hardworking.”

“And suddenly—because I’ve kissed Oakley—I’m not that person anymore?”

His mother didn’t reply to that, so he gave her the answer.

“I’m the same person I’ve always been.”

She swallowed heavily, but didn’t rebuff his assertion. “What about that Sadie girl?” she asked hopefully. “I thought you liked her.”

Joel considered and instantly dismissed opening that can of worms. He could only fight one battle at a time. And something told him he hadn’t won that particular war with Sadie.

Something had spooked her last night. He’d tried to ignore it, to chalk it up to too much amazing sex, but there had been something almost…haunted—for lack of a better word—in her eyes. Until he got things settled with her, that element of this unorthodox, but incredible relationship was going to have to remain a secret. “I do like her. A lot. But that doesn’t change how I feel about Oakley.”

Mom took off her glasses and wearily wiped her eyes. She wasn’t crying, but she looked like she might. It occurred to Joel that he’d never seen her cry. Not once. It was equally as sad to realize he’d never really heard her laugh, either.

“I don’t know what you want me to say, Joel.”

He wanted her to say she understood. That she accepted it. That she was proud of him and she loved him, but he knew that was too many emotions to ask for. “Then maybe I should be the one to do the talking. I’m with Oakley. I love him and I’m not going to hide that or pretend otherwise when we’re in public.”

She winced, but he continued anyway.

“And I love you, Mom. Nothing you say right now will ever change that. I know this feels wrong to you, but it doesn’t to me. For the first time in my life, I feel like I’m being completely true about who I am and what I want.”

“I’ve only ever wanted you to be happy, Joel.”

“Well, then take a good look.” He held his arms out. “Because this is it. I
am
happy.” And if he could find a way to convince Sadie to remain a part of the equation, that happiness would turn ecstatic. He’d crawled into bed last night, put his head on the pillow and known—honestly and truly known—what he wanted his future to hold for the first time ever. And he intended to move heaven and earth to make it happen. The man who’d spent a lifetime trying to make other people happy was going to grab the lion’s share of that emotion for himself.

His mother studied his face for several long, awkward moments. “I know you think I’m a hard, unforgiving woman.”

Joel shook his head, but she waved away his denial, pointing toward the barn. “I know that’s what he thinks too. And maybe I am, but I don’t know how to be anything else. Your father died when you were two months old. I had no money, no job, no skills, no family to help.”

Joel reached out and took her hand, relieved that she didn’t pull it away. Instead, she tightened her grip, squeezing his. “I’m not good at saying how I feel. I don’t understand what you’re doing with that man. And I’m not sure I’ll ever accept it.”

Her words pierced him.

“But I love you, Joel. I’m very proud of the man you’ve become. I don’t want to lose you. You’re all I have.”

He used their clasped hands to tug her close, wrapping her up in his embrace. “You’re not going to lose me, Mom. And I know I’ve thrown you for a loop. All I’m asking is that you try to understand.”

She nodded, her face still buried against his chest. Joel felt a bit of moisture seep through the cotton. She was crying. Strangely, he wasn’t sorry about that. He’d spent too much of his life trying to make sure he never gave her a reason for tears. Truth was she’d always been sad, and he suspected she needed a good cry. She had probably held this one in for thirty-plus years.

He gently rocked her as she worked to pull herself together. Then she took a step away, the moment gone as his mother and her strict, stoic countenance was back in place.

“I’ll try, Joel. I will.”

He smiled. “Can I ask for one more thing?”

She nodded.

“Can you try to be nicer to Oakley? You scare the poor guy.”

To his surprise—hell, to his outright amazement—his mother laughed. Loudly. Joel was so entranced by the sound he simply stood and watched her.

Once she’d regained control, she turned to open her car door. “I’m leaving.”

“Is that a no?” Joel asked, relieved by the turn the conversation had taken. He’d had several weeks to fret over his budding feelings for Oakley and his mother’s reaction. As so often happens, the reality of it was nowhere near as bad as his fears.

“That’s a no,” she said as she climbed in her car. “That boy needs a little fear to keep him honest.”

As she closed the car door and started the engine, Joel began to laugh as well.

His mother was right.

Oakley did.

* * *

Sadie stepped out of the office and hitched her purse up on her arm. She’d left the bar last night with nothing more than her house keys, allowing Joel and Oakley to drive her home. It wasn’t as if she could have driven her motorcycle home in a ripped shirt with no buttons. She might have a wild streak, but that didn’t include flashing her tits to the whole town.

“Hot date, Sadie?” one of the patrons asked, clearly taking notice of her dressy outfit and makeup.

“Maybe. Maybe not,” she said nonchalantly. “Why? You jealous, Teddy?” She hoped the question would turn the attention away from her as she wasn’t about to feed the rumor mill. It worked. Teddy’s drinking buddies started teasing him about his interest in Sadie as she kept walking. So far she’d managed to avoid her dad who was in the back alley, pulling in boxes from a delivery truck. She wanted that lucky break to continue.

Sadie had almost made it to the door when Jenna Mitchum walked in, her five-year-old in tow and an infant in her arms.

Sadie raised her hands to stop her. “Hey, Jenna. I’m not so sure this is a good place for—”

Before Sadie could say “kids,” Jenna had thrust the baby into her arms.

“Please, Sadie. Can you watch them for just a second? I have a bone to pick with my husband. He was supposed to be home two hours ago.”

Sadie glanced over her shoulder and caught sight of the back of Russell Mitchum, bent over the pool table, lining up a shot. Russ wasn’t a bad guy overall. He just wasn’t the most responsible dad…or particularly bright.

“Um…” Sadie had wanted to say no, but Jenna didn’t give her the chance as she left the baby and her young son, Billy, in her care.

Sadie looked around, hoping to find someone else to pawn off this task on. She had zero experience with kids and, as such, they sort of terrified her.

“You got any ice cream?” Billy asked.

Sadie shook her head, and then she was distracted by the raised voices coming from the back of the bar. Billy noticed as well. Sadie didn’t want the kid to see his parents fighting, so she grasped his hand and said, “Let’s go outside. Sometimes the ice cream truck drives by here.”

It was a lie, but the boy believed her just the same. They walked outside the door and claimed the bench set up there for the smokers. No one else was around.

Billy’s feet swung madly as he glanced up and down the street hopefully for a treat that was never going to come. Sadie felt bad, but figured not getting ice cream would be less traumatic than listening to his parents screaming at each other.

The baby stirred in her arms and, for the first time, Sadie was forced to turn her attention to the tiny little thing. She did some quick math and figured the infant couldn’t be more than two months old. “Boy or girl?” she asked Billy, unable to recall.