Raw: The Ultimate Mc Collection (32 page)

Riot was nowhere to be seen.

I sighed, stretched and smiled the biggest smile I had ever smiled in my life.  He was amazing.  The things he had done to my body were amazing.  I had never felt so alive.

I was free.

I was happy.

I jumped up, dressed, and ran back down the hall to my room.  I had to pass the living room, but luckily, it was empty.  I didn’t want to explain to anyone why I was coming out of Riot’s room.

I jumped in the shower as soon as I reached my room, my smile still plastered across my face.  My body was still singing from the intense pleasure I had felt with Riot. I knew I was missing out on a lot, but I had no idea I was missing out on that!  

I washed my hair, and a huge wave of gratitude washed over me.  Riot was the most perceptive, intuitive lover, and he concentrated on making me shake, shudder and come all night and all morning.

My lips, breasts and every inch of my flesh was still on fire with his touch.  He had been gentle at the right times, and not so gentle exactly when I needed it. 

I didn’t know all the things that I read about in books had the potential of really happening.  I thought happiness was a fairy tale, and the elusive man that actually cared about your pleasure was an illusion.  Riot was quickly showing me something that was a complete contrast to any other experiences I had had.

Not one of Monty’s friends had ever been interested in anything I was feeling.  Usually, it was a quick session of them grunting over me for five minutes.  The other times, it was just a lot of acting out some stupid fantasy they had.

I had never come like that before.  Not like last night.  Riot had brought me over the edge over and over again, until I was a babbling mess of shuddering flesh.  Sure, I had masturbated, but even I didn’t know how to do some of the things Riot had done to me.

I was smitten.

And what did that mean? 

Now that I was out of Riot’s arms, reality began crashing down around me.  I was supposed to be leaving.  Starting over.  Assuming a new identity.

But, suddenly, the last thing I wanted to do was leave this ramshackle paradise in the woods with my new lover.

You killed Monty
, the familiar whisper of my conscience curled up in my ear, but this time, again, nothing happened. My heart didn’t speed up, I felt not one pang of guilt, fear or trepidation. 

I felt nothing but happiness.

I’ve always heard that everything happens for a reason, but I could never really believe it.  How could all the shit my mom did to me have any good reason? Or Monty?  There was never any nugget of reason to any of that, as far as I could see.  I was just doing what I needed to do to survive, and never thought I’d really ever get out of it.

But if all of that wouldn’t have happened, I would never be standing here today.  It was crazy to think about, really.  If my mom hadn’t been such a monster.  If Monty hadn’t bought me, hadn’t decided to use me to gain more money and power by selling me to his friends, if he hadn’t sent me on that last date with the weird egg guy.  If I hadn’t been walking down that street, if I hadn’t been stopped by the cop, if I hadn’t gotten in the car with him.  If I hadn’t been in jail, I never would have met the woman who gave me Grace’s card.

And if I hadn’t killed Monty, I never would have called.

And if I never called, then I never would have met Riot, and last night would have never happened.

I sighed, and realized…I was starting to finally heal.

Escaping from Monty, reaching out to Solid Ground, opening my heart to Riot, those things were finally allowing my soul to heal, if only little bits at a time.

And all because a woman slipped me a business card.

A business card.

Oh, shit!

Where’s the fucking card?

Suddenly, I realized I hadn’t seen it since I had arrived here.  Grace had explicitly instructed me on the phone to destroy the card, but I had shoved it in my bag, wanting for some reason to hold on to it, just in case.  In case what?  I don’t know.  In case I needed it again.

I flew out of the bathroom, naked, still wet from the shower, and began riffling through my unpacked bag.  I looked in all the pockets, and the pockets of all my jeans, to no avail.  I searched around the room, my heart beating wildly by now, the frantic feeling of having royally fucked up washing over me and driving that blissed-out peacefulness away faster than it had arrived.

I couldn’t find it anywhere.

I stood in the middle of the room, tears streaming down my face, as I realized how badly I had fucked up.  How could I have left that behind?

I dressed quickly and ran out the door of the clubhouse.  It was strange that the clubhouse was still completely empty, but I didn’t think about it too much at that point.  But when I reached Grace and Ryder’s cabin, and they didn’t answer my persistent knocking, I walked back to the clubhouse slowly, trying to think of what to do.

When I returned, I realized I was all alone, which only fueled the insipid paranoia that quickly crept up my spine and settled in the back of my skull like a dull ache.

What had I fucking done?

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Grace

“Howdy, Ms. Grace,” John, the bartender, said, as I walked through the swinging door of the Rodeo Roadhouse.  It was the closest, and only, place to get a decent burger near the clubhouse, and I needed a break from the cabin.

“Hi, John!”

“Where’s Ryder today?”

“He had some business to attend to with the club today in Portland.  Just me today.”

I nodded to Susie, his waitress, when she walked out of the kitchen.  Susie and John had become familiar faces after Ryder had brought me here the first time.  I had been trying so hard to remember something, anything, about where I had come from, who I was, and Ryder had brought me here for our first public outing after I woke up from my very long slumber.

The things I had finally remembered still haunted me, and I’d be lying if I said I was completely glad I remembered.  Sometimes there are things in the past you just wish you could wash away.  But it doesn’t work that way, does it?

That’s why I was here, needing a break from the work I had chosen to do.  It was brutal, knowing that every second of every day there was some woman out in the world being abused.  Someone that needed saving, because for whatever reason, they couldn’t save themselves.

Like Lacey.  Lacey’s story wove through my head as I waited for my order.  I shuddered thinking about the hell she had been put through, not only at Monty’s hands, but at her mother’s.  I had a suspicion the horrors her mother put her through had left even deeper scars than the men who had used her body for their own perverted pleasure.

I knew first hand the devastation that a wicked mother could cause, the kind that lingered deep under your skin, changing you in ways you’d never imagine, making you do things you’d never normally do, if you been blessed with a loving, caring, nurturing mother.  It broke you right open when you didn’t have that basic need met.

And I could see it had done that to Lacey.  She was hard on the outside, but I could see through the cracks.  She was a mess inside, lost, confused.

Which made me half happy and half concerned that she had connected so strongly with Riot.  Riot was a good man, but was he really what Lacey needed right now?

I wasn’t sure about that.  She was the opposite of me.  I had been independent all my life, and meeting Ryder had changed all of that.  I couldn’t imagine my life now without him.

But Lacey had depended on that sick fuck, Monty, so heavily, that I really felt she needed to see what it was like to be on her own.

Ryder and the Gods had gone to Portland this morning for club business, and Riot had been given the task of riding to Salem to obtain Lacey’s fake id, birth certificate, and social security card.  I had a friend in the Capital from my days as a cop.  Sarah was easily able to obtain things like that, and I was so grateful for her.  She had proven to be a good friend, and one of the few that I trusted.

When I went to let Lacey know where I was going, and that she would be alone for an hour or so, she was sleeping peacefully in Riot’s bed.  I didn’t disturb her, left her a note in the kitchen, and took off. 

She looked happy for the first time.

Everything was falling into place nicely.  As soon as she had arrived at the clubhouse, I made a series of phone calls that put the ball in motion, not only to get her a new ID, but also a new apartment and a job, too.  I was confident we would be able to get her safely set up somewhere else, where Monty’s people and the cops looking for her wouldn’t find her. 

Even with my connections on the force, I didn’t trust the police in this situation.  If she hadn’t killed the fucking Mayor of Seattle, then maybe I could ask them to quietly close the case and look the other way while I got Lacey placed. But not now. There was no one I knew on the force that could help with this situation.

Susie brought me my burger and I thanked her.  She lingered at my table.

“A woman came by yesterday,” she said.  “Asking questions. Reporter, she claimed. Said she was following up on a lead.  Asked about the club.  Said she was looking for a girl from Seattle.”

Shit. My heart began pounding in my chest. 

“Oh, yeah? You get any more info?”

“She gave me her card,” Susie replied, pulling a card out of the pocket of her apron.  “Cute little blonde with a perky nose and perkier tits. Told me to call her if I heard anything.”

I looked at the card.

Diana Trudeau

Investigative Reporter

KATU News

Portland, Oregon

The woman from the news the other day.  Just fucking lovely.  

“You answer any of her questions?” I asked Susie.

“Nope,” she replied with a wink, as she refilled my water glass.  “I don’t talk to strangers.”

I nodded, and smiled gratefully as she walked away.

My suspicions confirmed, I downed my lunch as fast as I could and went out to my car.  I sat behind the wheel, my head spinning with anxiety, when I heard the distinctive ring of the safe phone.

I dug it out of my purse, looked at the caller ID, and answered quickly.

“What’s the password?” I asked.

“Who is this?” A gruff male voice barked.  

“What’s the password?” I asked again.  

The resounding click in my ear told me everything I needed to know.  

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

Riot

I was walking on air.  I hadn’t been this happy since…well, fuck, since never.  I tried all day to wipe the shit-eating grin off my face, but try as I might, I failed. 

Lacey’s skin was still sliding under my fingertips, her soft moans echoing in my ears, her incredible body writhing and undulating against mine, those tight thighs still wrapped around me.  I couldn’t shake the feeling of still being in bed with her.  My mind didn’t want to let go, as much as my body didn’t hours ago, as I left her peacefully sleeping in my bed.

By the time I made it to Salem, I was finally beginning to resemble some form of the man I used to be.  I was Riot, goddammit.  Letting my mind be clouded like that left me vulnerable, and I couldn’t afford to be vulnerable.

I needed to make sure I wasn’t being watched, or followed.  I needed to retrieve the package from Sarah, and be on my way back to the clubhouse safely.  All of that was fairly easy to do, as long as I kept my wits about me.  As long as I didn’t get carried away by thoughts of Lacey’s gorgeous body laid out before me, waiting, willing, begging for more of me…

See? I did it again.

Stop it!
 I commanded myself as my bike roared up to the park I was meeting Sarah at.  
Lacey’s life depends on this!

I managed to wipe the smile from my face as I parked, took off my helmet, and looked around.  A few dozen people were milling around, some jogging, some walking their dogs, and others just laying on blankets.  A typical day.  Nothing to worry about.

I spotted Sarah sitting on a bench by the pond, feeding the ducks that had gathered around her.  I walked over, feeling the familiar stares that my cut always seemed to invite.  I ignored them, and sat down with Sarah.