Random Acts of Senseless Violence (21 page)

Then he said has your sister ever talked to you about what's bothering her? ‘No but I think it's because she's not happy here' I said. I can understand that Daddy said I'm not either. ‘There's something else too but I can't tell what' I said and Daddy nodded his head.

I looked at his beard and remembered how when I was small he let me sit on his lap while he was reading and tie braids in it. Once I tied so many that he had to trim his beard really short because the braids all got tangled but he didn't get mad at me. I wanted to tie a braid in his beard then but I didn't because I've gotten too old to be doing things like that. Your mother and I are very worried about her Daddy said. ‘I know I am too' I said. We're going to be sending her to a specialist soon he said. I've just about worked something out. ‘You mean a shrink?' I asked and he nodded. ‘If she won't talk to us why would she talk to a shrink?' I asked. People say anything to strangers he said even young people. I doubt it but if that's what he thinks it won't hurt to try. Are you unhappy here? he asked me. ‘I'm not as happy as I could be that's all' I said. This won't last forever sweetie I promise you he said. I was glad Daddy and I had time together yesterday, he's been so sad lately and I was happy we could finally get together for a while.

When it was six I went and met Iz. We walked to her
apartment building. Anne the place is bad enough from the outside but you should see the lobby. There were bullet holes in the glass in the doors and half the lights were broken out. A pipe in the ceiling was broken and dripping water on the floor. There was a desk like for a doorman but it had been turned over and smashed like with axes. People wrote graffiti all over the walls. Half the elevators weren't working and had their doors pulled away like somebody tried to get in them with a can opener. Five or six men were sitting in broken chairs drinking beer and staring at us.

We rode up. On Iz's floor the halls are concrete block that's been painted green halfway up like in a basement. The windows at the end were broken out. She pointed to one door as we walked by and told me that was where Esther lived. Inside her apartment it was completely different, it was really nice though not as big as the one we live in now. There's a living room and a kitchen and two bedrooms. Iz and her mother have nice furniture and a big sound system and even some paperback books. We put my bag in her room which was cozy but pretty. Iz has flowered curtains on her window and a double bed with white ruffles and big pillows. On her walls she has a poster of Martin Luther King and a photo of her and Jude hugging and showing their teeth at the camera. Iz said come meet mama who was in the kitchen. Her mother didn't say anything but hello when she saw me and then she got up and went into the other room.

‘You hungry?' Iz asked me fixing herself a sandwich. ‘No thank you' I said because I didn't know how much food they'd have so I made sure I ate enough before coming over. Iz had just finished eating her sandwich when her mother said ‘Isabel come in here I want to talk to you.' Iz rolled her eyes and told me to just sit and wait till she came back. I heard them shut a door but if they didn't want me to know they were arguing it didn't do any good. I could hear them yelling but I couldn't hear what they were saying. After five minutes or so I heard the door open
and a minute later Iz came back in the kitchen with my bag and a plastic bag she'd stuffed some clothes into. ‘Lola we going' she said looking at the clock on the wall. ‘What's wrong?' ‘Six thirty curfew soon come on' Iz said handing me my bag. I stood up and followed her through the living room. ‘Don't you be stomping out of here like this' her mother was saying from her bedroom. ‘We stay at Jude's then. I tell you it's not right' Iz shouted back. ‘Jesus God child they'll shoot you on the street it's not safe' her mother said. ‘I know' said Iz pulling me out by the arm. ‘Isabel' her mother said but Iz slammed the door behind her.

‘I'm ashamed' Iz said when we got to the elevator. She was so mad she was slapping her hand against the door until I touched her shoulder. ‘I can't believe her girl I can't.' ‘Why do we have to leave?' ‘She bad as Weezie' Iz said and we got in the elevator. ‘What did she say?' ‘No mind Lola no mind' Iz said. ‘Because I'm white?' Iz nodded. ‘She don't like Weezie either. That a bitch or what?' Iz said. We got back to the lobby and went outside. There were chunks of concrete lying on the entrance plaza where they'd fallen off the building and Iz picked one up and threw it. ‘Where are we going?' ‘I'm going over Jude's. Not as homey but it mine too. You too you want to come too. You wanta go home I understand' Iz said. For a second I thought about going back. But I figured Daddy would be sleeping and Mama working and Boob not saying anything and I knew I could see them any time. But I wanted to stay over with Iz last night and so I said okay. ‘Got to get there fore curfew then come on' she said.

We tracked Broadway. It was still light out now that the time had changed. Fire trucks with their sirens on whizzed uptown and police cars too. There was a big group of rough men at 130th standing in front of a bodega and we crossed the street so we'd avoid them. One of the men yelled at the others and they shouted back at him. Then Army humvees drove up and soldiers got out holding rifles. The men had baseball bats and sticks and started throwing rocks and
bottles at the soldiers. I slowed up to watch but Iz grabbed my arm and dragged me along with her. Then there were some popping sounds and Iz said ‘Run.' We ran. The soldiers were shooting at the crowd and the crowd broke up but then people started firing at the soldiers with their guns from windows over the bodega.

We saw more Army coming downtown. A subway train passing by grinding its wheels stopped on the tracks and people started throwing bottles at it which exploded and started burning. Lots of people started running down the street toward us screaming like they were being chased. ‘Shit' Iz said and we turned east down 136th. Kids were playing on the stoops and in the street like nothing was going on and we ran right through. Iz knocked over a little boy she ran so fast and I was glad I keep in shape because she'd have gotten blocks ahead of me otherwise. She looked down Amsterdam and then we ran north again to 138th. On that street and on the blocks going east were more soldiers. They went from building to building yanking people out. One lady wouldn't stop screaming and a soldier hit her in the mouth with his gun and she started bleeding. I've never been so scared in my life Anne but we kept running until we got to Jude's building. We cut through the vacant lot over the bricks behind the building. We pulled the cover away from the hole and crawled through. ‘Jude or Weez round one' Iz said when we got inside and pulled the cover back. She whistled and somebody upstairs whistled back. ‘Jude' Iz said. ‘You solo here this where she stash the flash' she said taking out a flashlight from a hole in the plaster wall. ‘There three so there always one.'

Jude was kneeling on her mattress looking out the window when we got upstairs. ‘Some target' Iz said. ‘They not shootin stars just suspects' Jude said not moving. It was getting dark inside and hard to see. ‘Should we light candles?' I asked. ‘Keep it black' Jude said. We got beside her and peeked out. We couldn't see anything but heard more shots and sirens and screams.

‘Thought you was campin over tonight' Jude said. ‘Wanted to but Mama she see Lola and pull her Islam Nation rap and we booted' Iz said. ‘You didn't tell her you hostin a white devil?' ‘She got to adjust sometime' Iz said. ‘Well Weez be here soon that keep the oven hot here too' Jude said. I knew it would happen soon that I had to see her but I didn't think it would be this soon. ‘Is everybody rioting?' I asked. ‘Seem so' Jude said resting her back against the wall. ‘Everbody sick a these greenasses wilding our crowd. Take so much and no more' said Iz and I thought about the rat Jude caught. ‘We saw them taking people out of buildings beating them up' I said. ‘That's constant Army or not' Jude said. ‘Why?' ‘Crackhead roundup they claim but the Pit still overtiming' Iz said. ‘That free enterprise' Jude said.

The room shook a moment later and plaster fell from the ceiling when a big explosion went off. I was worried they were going to blow up the building but Iz and Jude didn't even seem to notice. ‘What if they come in here?' I asked. ‘That why we keep dark inside, so they don't come knockin' Jude said. ‘Front all sealed up place look dead gone' said Iz. ‘We're really safe?' ‘Till Weez get here' Jude said laughing. ‘She better get here soon.' Iz looked over at me and I guess even in the dark she could tell I was still worried. ‘Show her our defense Jude' Iz said.

‘Operation Dead Motherfucker' Jude said reaching underneath the mattress between the bricks. She pulled out a huge rifle with handgrips and sights on the top. ‘If you skinny this add twenty pound weight real fast.
Lead
weight. You seen them Russians hustlin little dolls and shit?' she asked. I nodded looking at the rifle. Jude held it like she knew how to use it before she slid it back between the bricks. ‘Sell these too if you know how to ask' Jude said. ‘Nobody touch that but me' she added. ‘But if a bunch of them came in wouldn't they kill you too?' I asked. ‘A squad yeah. One or two go nightcrawlin, they regret. If we beset we be strategic' Jude said lifting up a
rope. ‘Hooked up to the wall. Drop it out, slide down, we gone' she said.

We heard another whistle and Jude whistled back. ‘She beddin here too?' Iz asked. I was glad when Jude shook her head. ‘Weez just drop in fore she go cattin. Might reconsider tonight though' Jude said. Helicopters flew over shining searchlights into the vacant lots. The noises outside were loud but distant enough we could hear footsteps on the stairs outside. ‘Yoyoyo it hurricane weather out there' Weez said coming through the door. She carried a bag that she put on the desk. It was dark enough that I don't know if she saw me right away or not. If she did she didn't say anything. Reaching into her bag she pulled out a big bottle of beer and opened it. It fizzed all over her hand. ‘You can't pass Weez where you get that?' Jude asked. ‘Not no bodega no. Go downtown, Koreans sell anything anybody' Weez said. ‘Maybe almost anybody. Deal me' Jude said. Weez tossed her another bottle of beer and opened a bag of potato chips. As you'd expect she ate them by shoving huge handfuls in her mouth and crunching them with her mouth open to make the loudest noise.

‘It too dark for goodness now help me put the shades up Iz' Jude said. She and Iz got pieces of wood and metal sheets and covered the windows. ‘Let there be light' Iz said lighting the candles on the desk. In a second the room was bright and we could see again. ‘Take em down when we bedaway get air back in' Jude said. Now I knew Weez knew I was there but she still didn't say anything to me. ‘How's the pacifyin goin?' Jude asked. ‘They workin overtime not shootin the right ones' Weez said staring at me. ‘No news there' Jude said. ‘Otherwise calm so look I'm gone.' ‘Where you runnin?' Jude asked. ‘Out. Down' said Weez. ‘They gonna shoot you out there Weez stay here' Iz said. ‘I'm no spare' Weez said starting to limp toward the door holding her beer. ‘Sit yourself' Jude said sounding threatening. Weez stanced there a moment. ‘Rat die in here or what somethin stink' she said. ‘Zip it' Jude said.

Weez sat on top of the desk. ‘What?' she asked. ‘I don't need attitude' Jude said. ‘Look you're buggin and we're problematicked. You deadheadin Weez I know why you walkin.' ‘Time wastin Jude speak up' Weez said. ‘Why's Lola pick at you soul so?' I felt embarrassed but thought I'd better not join in just yet. ‘Answer girl you jealous or what?' ‘Jealous shit' Weez said. ‘So level' Jude said. ‘It flatline now nada level needin' ‘You lyin' Iz said. ‘You not the only one people literate Weez we read fine. There nough warrin outside' Jude said. ‘Too much slummin round here tonight' Weez said. ‘Too much trash blow in.' ‘Freez Weez' said Iz. ‘Look we booked full here cause Iz's mama deadheaded like so many no minds do and evicted unlawful' Jude said. ‘Senseless to be cat tonguin when you keen to spit. Blow or suck, Weez. Hear me?'

Weez nodded her head without looking at us. She kicked her good foot against the side of the desk making noise. ‘Some matter some don't' she said. ‘What's meant?' Jude asked. ‘Mean while you tradin up you tossin out good for bad' Weez said. ‘No tradin up Weez' said Iz. ‘It everbody for theyself these days' Jude said. ‘Four of us make one big one. That reasons right Weez and there no call for your ballistics. Peace yourselves proper less you cravin death-peace.' ‘Nobody hurtin yet' Iz said. ‘Maybe that what's needin' Weez said sounding angry. ‘You buggin Weez' Jude said. ‘You dissed me. Broke my daddy's knife' Weez said. ‘You probably already rebladed' Iz said but Weez shook her head and finished her beer. ‘No sales. Everbody too tensed' Weez said. Then without warning she got up and swung her beer bottle at me. Jude knocked her arm down but she still hit me on the side of the head.

I heard Jude and Iz shout and I fell over on the mattress holding my head and wondering if she fractured my skull. She didn't because she didn't hit me as hard as she wanted to but it hurt. There were pink and blue flashes in my eyes and the longer I sat there the more it hurt. When I put my hand against my head it came away red with blood. It
looked like more than there was I found out later. Weez was screaming and holding the bottle over her head waving it at Iz and Jude. ‘She think she better'n me too I know she do' Weez said. ‘Drop it Weez' Jude was saying. ‘Fuck her fuck you fuck her fuckin scrawnyass blazer wearin hair teasin pastyface puta fuck' Weez shouted.

I had enough Anne. I kicked out my legs and hit her in both knees with my shoes. She lost her balance and held onto the desk. ‘Watch the candles Iz watch em' Jude shouted and Iz caught one that was falling over. Sitting up and putting my fists together I hit Weez on the nose as hard as I could. She fell on her stomach on the floor with a crash. I jumped up from the bed and threw myself on her sitting down on her back like I do when I tease Boob. I didn't tease Weez though. I started slamming her face against the floor with one hand and with the other I grabbed her arm and bent it up behind her back. Anne I stopped thinking though I didn't realize it then only after. I had pictures in my mind of the way she hit me with the bottle and she looked at me and her stupid face and the noise she made eating potato chips. It made me madder and madder and I slammed harder and harder. She screamed but I didn't care.