Pwned (15 page)

“What should I do?” he asked.

I thought about this for a moment, wondering if I was even qualified to give him advice when I wouldn’t be following it myself.

“I think you should talk to her. If you guys are both getting picked on anyway
, isn’t it better to have someone you can talk to about it rather than having to deal with it alone?” I asked.

“Is that why you really hit that girl? Because she was making fun of someone you could talk to about stuff?”

“Yeah, buddy,” I answered. “That’s why I did it.”

“Hey Reagan?”

“Yeah Cannon?”

“For my non-genius big sister
, you’re pretty smart.”

15.
Sibling Aggro

“Reagan?” my mom asked, knocking on my bedroom door on Saturday morning and forcing me to (once more) unplug my computer violently from the wall so she wouldn’t see that I was gaming when I was grounded.

I pulled my decoy copy of
Looking For Alaska
off my bed and held it up in front of my face right as she entered the room.

“Hey M
om,” I said, a little too brightly. “Just reading. What’s up?”

I was kind of a terrible liar, but Mom either didn’t pick up on it or didn’t care enough to point it out
, because she had something to tell me.

“Your father and I have to go run some errands today
, so I need you to be here for Cannon’s play date,” she said, leaving out the obvious fact that I had to stay home anyway.

You know . . .
being grounded and all?

“Isn’t Cannon a little old for play dates?” I asked, thinking the
word sounded strange for a nine-year-old. I didn’t care how smart or socially awkward my brother was, no nine-year-old should have an arranged friend.

“Call it whatever you want—
he has a girl from his school coming over to ‘hang out,’” she said, putting air quotes around “hang out” like she thought “play date” was a better term for it.

“A girl
, huh?” I asked, wondering if it was the girl he’d told me about a few days ago.

“I know. He’s only nine and he’s already having girls over,” my mom answered in disbelief, looking much more stressed out than she should have been about the whole thing. “Anyway, she’ll be here in an hour but we have to get going
, so just keep an eye on them for me.”

“Will do
, chief,” I said with a salute.

Mom’s eyes shifted from me over to my computer screen and for a moment I was worried I hadn’t pulled the cord out. I tensed up but refused to look behind me and give myself away.

She didn’t say anything but gave me a meaningful look before leaving my room.

I let out a deep breath and c
hecked my computer for any sign that it had been on, only to realize that I’d had my headset on the whole time I’d been talking to my mom.

Smooth Reagan.
Really smooth.

+++

When Cannon’s little date (or whatever you called it when two nine-year-olds got together) showed up early, he instantly went into a panic, acting much less reserved than he normally was.

“Reagan
, do I look okay?” he asked in alarm, his big blue eyes wide.

It was pretty cute to see him getting all nervous over a girl
, and I was glad that he had made a friend at school. It meant that I didn’t have to go beat up some little kids for picking on my brother . . . Probably a good thing to avoid.

“You look fine,” I laughed. “Do you want me to get the door?”

Cannon nodded his head vigorously and pushed me toward the entryway with more force than I thought possible, given his small size.

“Take it easy
, Casanova,” I said with a grin as he ran back into his room.

Apparently he was trying to play it cool.

I opened the door to see a little girl with red curly hair, freckles, and big green eyes staring up at me with the biggest smile I’d ever seen. She was absolutely adorable, and it broke my heart that people like Tawny and I would spend all of our extra time making her school career miserable.

At least I had decided to change
, right? That had to count for something.

“Is Ca
nnon here?” she asked in a high-pitched voice, twirling a bright red curl around her finger.

“Yeah, come on inside,” I said, trying not to laugh at the fact that I was the chaperone for an elementary school romance.

“Lily, I told you to wait for me,” said an all-too-familiar voice as Parker ran up my driveway, chasing after the little girl. “Mom would kill me if I just let you walk into a stranger’s house. Sorry,” he added as he approached the door.

As soon as he saw my face
, his lighthearted grin melted away into an expression of pure confusion.

“Reagan?”

“Hey Parker,” I said stiffly. “So, you’re Lily’s brother? You two don’t look anything alike.”

Tactful
, as always.

“Yeah
, she got my mom’s red hair and my dad’s green eyes. I got the boring genes,” he joked, rubbing the back of his neck nervously like he always did.

It was a characteristic
that I was growing accustomed to.

“Hey Lily!”
Cannon called from upstairs, sounding overjoyed that he had a friend over for the first time.

He wasn’t exactly playing it cool
, but I was glad. I didn’t want my brother to turn out like me, constantly trying to play the game in high school. I would much rather he be himself, even if it got him labeled as a nerd.

“
Rekrap, can I go see Cannon now that you know his sister isn’t crazy?” Lily asked.

“Don’t get into too much trouble,” he warned at her retreating form, smiling fondly at his sister.

“Rekrap, huh?” I asked.

It was odd to hear Parker’s character’s name in the real world.

“Yeah, my sister went through this phase where she liked to spell words backward and say them. It’s pretty weird. But she liked my name backward, so it kind of stuck as a nickname,” he explained.

The whole time I’d known Parker online
, I’d just assumed his character’s name was his idea. Knowing it was his little sister’s nickname for him was slightly adorable.

Okay
, fine, it melted my heart, but that was just the possible concussion from Tawny’s hit talking.

“She went through a backward
spelling phase?” I asked, trying not to mention
Voyager’s Quest
at all and give myself away by asking about his character’s name.

“Yeah.
Genius kids,” he said with a shrug, knowing that I would understand better than anyone what weird things genius children did.

“I could write a book about all of the crazy things Cannon does,” I agreed, laughing.

Then we were silent.

I guess when the boy you like doesn’t realize that you’re actually his best online friend and
that you share all of the same interests, conversation runs dry pretty fast.

I shifted my weight uncomfortably a few times like an avatar left idle for too long before Parker startled me by bringing his hand slowly up to my cheek.
At first I thought he might kiss me and I had to figure out if I would still play snobby, indignant Reagan, or if I’d let him know how much I wanted to kiss him.

But he didn’t try to kiss me.

Instead, he let his finger lightly trace my almost-vanished bruise along my cheekbone.

“I’m really sorry about all of that,” he said
with a wince, as he dropped his hand back to his side.

My cheek felt like it was on fire where he had touched it
, but I very aggressively ignored that sensation.

“It’s not your fault,” I said in a small choked voice that didn’t sound like my own.

Who knew that after years of dating jocks who could easily pass as Abercrombie models, I’d be rendered speechless by a scrawny nerd?

“It kind of is,” he went on. “I definitely could have been nicer to your friend. I was just sick of seeing her pick on you.”

“She doesn’t pick on me,” I lied, though Parker gave me a look that said he wasn’t an idiot. “Maybe she’s not the nicest all the time,” I amended.

“She’s awful. I still don’t know why you hang out with her,” he said.

“Well, I probably won’t be hanging out with her after what I did. I’ll be lucky if she lets me finish out high school alive.”

“I don’t understand what you think she can do to you.”

“Parker, if you’re not scared of Tawny, then you don’t know her. At least, not as well as I do. You
should
be scared of her,” I told him, trying to make him understand.

“Is she going to kill me?” he asked jokingly.

While I didn’t think Tawny was evil enough to murder someone, I wouldn’t completely rule out that possibility.

“Not you, just your spirit,” I told him with a smile.

He laughed and looked down at the ground. Cannon and Lily came barreling down the stairs at full speed, loudly breaking up the little moment Parker and I were having. Honestly, though, it was probably a good thing, since I hadn’t decided which camp my foot was officially in yet.

“Lily knows how to play the matching game,” Cannon yelled to me as the two ran into the living room and spread the cards all over the floor.

“Oh no, is it that MIT matching game?” Parker asked me in a whisper.

“I didn’t know it was from MIT
, but yeah.”

“That game makes me feel like an idiot,” he admitted. “And I generally feel like a pretty smart person. It kind of comes with the territory of being a nerd
, you know?”

“Yeah
, well, it makes me feel like I’m an idiot, but I’m a cheerleader, so people pretty much expect me to be brainless.”

“That sounds like fun,” he said sarcastically.

I shoved him in the shoulder and smiled.

And then we endured another awkward silence.

If I were being myself, I could have asked him what he thought about the new spell cool-down time from the latest patch. I could have asked him if he had ever managed to get through the glitch in the wall to a dungeon the game makers had abandon and closed down after the first version of the game. But instead, I stood there uncomfortably, wondering what he was thinking.

“I guess . . .
” he began, trailing off for a moment. Suddenly, the sound of the TARDIS landing filled the room. He quickly pulled his phone out of his pocket and turned the alarm off.

“Shoot
, I have to go. I have a raid,” he said urgently.

“Oh yeah,” I agreed, almost forgetting that I was supposed to be at that same raid. Kaydinn would definitely kill us if we were late.

Parker gave me an odd look at my response, so I quickly added, “For that game you play, right?” trying to sound as clueless as possible.

“Yea
h, for ‘that game,’” he repeated, a ghost of a smile playing on his face.

“Well
, it was good seeing you,” I said honestly, wishing I didn’t mean it as much as I did.

“Good seeing you too,” he replied. “If things are really weird when you come back to school
, you can always sit by me,” he offered.

“Thanks Parker,” I said, knowing I could never take him up on his offer if I wanted to avoid eating lunch in my locker
, but still finding it unbelievably sweet that he would suggest it.

“Also you have an awesome right hook.
”

16. QQ

Sunday night meant that I only had a few more hours until I went back to school. That, of course, meant that I only had a few more hours until I saw firsthand how miserable it was to be an outsider.

I had no doubt that Tawny would have turned the entire squad against me by now
, but I could only hope that she hadn’t decided to torture me like she did everyone else in the school. Seeing as how I had given her a black eye, though, I was sure she had a personal vendetta against me now.

At least if she
decided to focus on destroying my life, she’d actually leave Parker alone.

Hopefully.

“Reagan?” my mom said on the other side of my closed door.

I was l
ying on my bed surrounded by all of the make-up work I was supposed to be doing all week. Leave it to me to wait until the very last minute to get all of my schoolwork done.

“Yeah
, Mom?”

“There’s someone h
ere to see you.”

It was eight at night on a Sunday; I couldn’t possible imagine who’d be paying me a leisurely visit at this time
. I sat up in bed and tried to pull my hair into a ponytail so I looked presentable.

As the doorknob turned
, I had a sudden moment of panic where I realized it may be Parker on the other side of that door. Who else would be visiting me, after all? It wasn’t like I had any friends anymore. But if Parker was coming to visit, it probably meant that he wanted to talk about the time I’d kissed him, which meant I’d either have to lie a lot or fess up to everything.

Luckily (sort of)
, I was saved from that awkward conversation when Tawny walked into my room, faded black eye and all.

I guess all I had done was exchange one awk
ward conversation for another, though I might prefer the conversation that ended with me snagging a nerdy boyfriend rather than the one that ended with me getting punched in the face.

“Hey,” I said cautiously.

I was really hoping she wasn’t here for round two, because I was exhausted and didn’t think I’d hold up against Tawny and her rage.

“Hey,” she responded.

Our conversation so far had been pretty eloquent.

“Listen
, if you’re here to tell me I’m off The Squad—”

“No
, it’s not that,” she interrupted, looking unsure of herself and pretty uncomfortable.

It was a look I hadn’t seen Tawny wear often.

“I wanted to tell you that I’m sorry for what I said.”

I looked at her for a moment, trying to
decide if I was hallucinating or not. The odds that Tawny was actually apologizing without some ulterior motive were slim.

“It was pretty messed up of me to make that jab about Zane,” she went on
.

She sounded almost sincere—i
f I didn’t know Tawny better than that, that is. She definitely had some sort of reason for suddenly taking the higher ground, and I wasn’t about to fall for it.

“I’m sorry I punched you,” I said, knowing I still needed to play along.

“Yeah, that wasn’t cool,” she responded with a small laugh.

“Was that all you wanted?”

“No, I was coming to tell you that you aren’t getting kicked off The Squad. I think it would really lower morale if one of the captains left, so I think it’s important that we stick together.”

Ok
ay, this was definitely suspicious. Tawny was not a “stay together for the kids” type. She was a “send the kids to boarding school because I didn’t like them in the first place” type.

“Okay,” I said slowly.

“And I think, to show just how close the two of us are, you should head up the little hazing ritual we discussed,” she said with a smile.

Right.
The hazing ritual I’d come up with. The one where we'd get Parker arrested. That definitely presented a problem, and I tried to mull over some way to keep him out of it.

“After all, that nerd almost ruined our friendship
. I think it’s only fair he pay the price.”

I didn’t bother pointing out the fact that Park
er hadn’t ruined our friendship—Tawny and her awful behavior had ruined it. Besides, I was beginning to figure out the perfect way to get back at Tawny for all the misery she’d caused people, including myself. I, of course, had caused my fair share of misery over the years as well, and I’d find some way to make that right for everyone, but in the meantime, I was focusing on Tawny.

“You’re absolutely right,” I agreed vehemently.

“I’m so glad you agree,” she said, pulling me up off of my bed and wrapping her arms around me in a tight hug. “Things can go back to normal now, right?” she whispered in my ear.

“Of course,” I lied.

“Because you know that Zane and I aren’t together anymore, right?” she asked, pulling away from me but keeping her arms around my neck.

We had always been close, but suddenly I didn’t really feel like cuddling up to Tawny
, and our close proximity just reminded me of how much I had changed. We weren’t the same people anymore. Not by a long shot.

“I didn’t know that,” I said.

“That whole thing with him was just a one-time deal,” she promised, making her eyes wide and innocent, even though I could see right through her.

If the one time I’d seen them together was a one-time thing
, then how did you explain them always hanging out together behind my back? Or the fact that Zane’s room always reeked of Tawny’s cotton candy perfume? Even now I could smell the scent on her. Really, it was my own fault for not seeing the obvious signs ages ago. I had no one to blame but myself.

Gosh
, Mom would be proud of me. Taking ownership and all.

“I appreciate that,” I said through gritted teeth, trying to smile with all of my might.

Tawny finally released my neck and gave me a satisfied grin, glad that I had so easily fallen into her trap, I assumed.

She really underestimated me.

“I’m glad you see things my way, Rae,” she said, posing for a moment before turning to leave. “I’ll see you at school tomorrow.”

“Bye,” I said as she left.

When I could hear her car starting up outside, I sat on my bed, feeling empowered. I knew Tawny was up to something, and I knew that being friends with me would be the means to whatever end she had planned.

Normally I’d be furious that she thought I could be manipulated so easily
, but I had plans of my own. I had finally figured out how to get back at Tawny and make things better for everyone we’d picked on at the same time. Unfortunately, it did mean I’d have to hurt Parker one last time.

I could only hope he’d understand
.

+++

“Kimber, you’re moving like a three-legged dog and it’s pissing me off,” I could hear Tawny yell as I entered the gym for cheer practice after school on Monday.

It felt kind of
odd to be in my uniform again, like nothing had happened. Things had gone pretty well at lunch, and no one had looked like they wanted to kill me, so that was always a good thing.

“Get back in formation before I put you out of your misery,” Tawny shouted as I walked up and stood beside her.

“Rough day?” I asked.

“You have no idea how hard it is to manage them without you. It’s like, a fate worse than death,” she informed me.

As Tawny glanced at me, her entire disposition changed. She went from her leadership pose to the pose she adopted when facing a weaker opponent.

“Reagan,” she said slowly, as if I wouldn’t understand her if she spoke too fast. “What the
eff is on your face?”

“Oh
, don’t be such a drama queen, Tawny, they’re just glasses,” I told her, trying to sound nonchalant.

“And why are you wearing them? Are you trying to spit in the face of my
generous decision to let you back on The Squad?”

I restrained myself from telling her that it wasn’t really her call if I was on The Squad or
not, and simply shrugged my shoulders. I needed her to think I was completely on-board if my revenge scheme was going to work.

“My contacts were bugging me during my last class so I
took them out. It’s not a big deal,” I said.

“Not a big deal? Are you kidding me?” she spat, her voice much more venomous than it should have been over something like glasses. “Take those ugly things off or I’m revoking my
friendship offer,” she whispered.

“Are you serious?” I asked in disbelief. “Tawny, I won’t be able to see without them. What if I hurt someone on The Squad because I don’t know where to p
ut my foot or something?”

“I’d rather have every last one of them end up in the hospital than have our reputation marred by your hideous glasses,” she said seriously.

“Really?” I asked skeptically.

“Really,” she confirmed.

I tried to stare her down for a moment, wanting more than anything to win this fight, before reminding myself that I didn’t have to wait much longer for all of this to be worth it. I just needed to hang in there.

Smiling sweetly
, I removed the glasses from my face and stuck them in my duffle bag. I was pretty sure Tawny approved, but I couldn’t be completely sure, since I definitely couldn’t see her now.

“Much better,” she said before turning back to The Squad
, who I’m guessing were watching our entire exchange. “Everyone get in formation for the heel stretch pyramid.”

Oh great.

Tawny was going to force me to get on top of the stupid pyramid when I couldn’t see anything. It was like she wanted the entire squad to hate me when I ruined our routine and possibly injured people. At least I now knew her apology the other day wasn’t sincere.

That made me feel
a little better about my own plans.

I took my position in the middle of the small group of cheerleaders on the right side, preparing myself for the worst.

“Here we go,” Tawny yelled from her position in the middle group. “I’ll count it out.”

I took a deep breath and hoped my muscle memory would serve me well as Tawny began counting.

My spotters lifted me up into the first position and on my left side I could see Tawny and Kimber pop up next to me. Next came the second lift, where they would elevate us even higher above their heads and I would be expected to land my ankle perfectly into Tawny’s outstretched hand as she held Kimber’s ankle and my own.

Unfortunately, that wasn’t quite what happened.

Instead, I panicked and looked over, trying desperately to find Tawny’s hand as I extended my leg up into the air above my head. What I ended up doing was overshooting her hand and bringing my heel down on top of her head.

Hard.

This, of course, sent Tawny reeling into Kimber and her spotters, causing her group and Tawny’s group to collapse into a heap of groaning cheerleaders while I was stuck in the air on display as the girl who had just kicked Tawny.

“Let me down
, guys,” I said quietly to my spotters. I didn’t want Tawny knocking me over to get back at me, so the closer I was to the ground, the safer I was.

“Seriously
, Reagan?” she said, storming over to me. “How are you such an idiot?”

“I told you I c
an’t see without my glasses on!” I said defensively.

It wasn’t like I hadn’t warned her. It wasn’t my fault if
she was too vain to listen.

“I don’t see what having your glasses on has to do with you kicking me in the head,” she shot back.

The entire squad were rubbing various sore places and glaring at me. At least, I assumed they were glaring. Who knew in this foggy world I was forced to live in? It was all because
somebody
wouldn’t let me wear my stupid glasses.

I guess I could take comfort in the fact that Tawny didn’t care about anyone else on T
he Squad; it wasn’t personal. The fact that she was willing to endanger everyone else just to prove a point was slightly unnerving, though. I wondered why no one else could see how terrible she was.

“Whatever. I guess we’ll just look like a bunch of idiots at the pep rally
, since we can’t perform a simple heel stretch pyramid,” she screamed at a terrifying volume before storming out of the gym.

The doors slammed shut behind her and the rest of us were left to stand in an awkward silence
. No one really knew what we should do next.

Gosh, we were such sheep.

“Sorry guys,” I mumbled, hoping they wouldn’t hate me too much. They may have been mindless followers like I used to be (and still was, to a certain extent), but they were sweet girls deep down. They weren’t nearly on the same level as Tawny when it came to being evil.

A few of them shrugged at me, but no one really said anything as we slowly filed out of the gym
. Kimber was clutching her backside and wincing with every step she took, which I could see once I put my glasses back on.