Purpose (17 page)

“I never really thanked them for the gift.” Drawing on his experience when he was first “chosen,” Will kept his emotions under control, barely. “Back then, I was wrapped up in David’s death, doing what the Purpose wanted. I didn’t take the time to reflect on what I was doing. I took the car, my trust fund, and disappeared from their lives.”

Swallowing the lump in his throat, he almost reveled in the feeling. Almost. He blinked away the beginnings of tears and nodded. “I can only imagine what they thought. Blamed themselves, I’m sure. Probably spent the rest of their lives wondering what they did that was so awful it pushed me away.”

This trip was a mistake. Why had he thought this was wise? Cutting off contact had been hard, very hard. And that was when
It
was more assertive. Now? Now, he was Will Morgan again, with all his emotions and regrets.

“Will, they probably thought you never got over David.”

He meant well, but he didn’t understand. “Ryan, I left. One day I was at work. The next, I disappeared for good. No note, no call, nothing. But there was evidence I was still alive. Trust fund, license, apartment, things that said I wasn’t dead.

“After all they did for me, I left them without an explanation or even good-bye. That’s what this… this…
thing
did to me. It warped my thinking so I thought it was for the best. But I was wrong. It was simply easier for me that way.”

The engine purred as it powered them up I-95. Despite leaving it in storage for years, the facility had kept it in perfect working order. A gentle, soothing hum was the only sound as they let the silence drag on for a time.

“So, why is Will suddenly emerging from the shadows?”

“I don’t know.” Here was the topic they’d danced around since they met. “But I know you’re the key.”

“Me?”

“Yes.” How much did he say before he sent Ryan running? “Somewhere inside you is the answer.”

“Inside me? How do you know that?”

“Because it isn’t inside
me
.” Time to lay it all out. “Right from the beginning, you affected me. Emotions I thought long buried emerged within minutes. Something about you tames the Purpose, and that has allowed me, William Morgan, to shake off Gar’s stifling yoke. The answer is inside you, and at some point I need to find it.”

How would he answer? Would Ryan trust him enough to let him go rooting around inside his head? He glanced at Ryan out of the corner of his eye. The thought of violating his mind made Will sick. It was the ultimate betrayal. He might never be able to heal that wound.

“What does ‘find out’ mean?”

Despite the question, Ryan knew what Will meant. Sooner or later he needed to tell Ryan. Might as well be right now. “I need to get into your head to search for the answer.”

“Does it hurt?” Ryan let trust trump his fear.

“Not unless I want it to.” The car in front was going too slow, so Will “told” the driver to speed up and get over. “People never know I’ve been in their minds. However, I won’t lie, you might be different.”

“Different?”

“Normally, when I read people’s minds, I don’t have to go far. For example, I tell you to think about your high school math teacher, and the image comes to mind. So it’s right there for me to pluck. But how do I do that if you don’t know what you’re supposed to think about? That might require me to go deeper into your mind to try to tease it out. In theory, it shouldn’t hurt, but you might fight me and then… honestly, I don’t know.”

“Do I have a choice?”

“Of course!” Why did the question bother him? “It’s up to you if I look.”

“What if I say no?” Ryan finally looked over. “Will you do it anyway?”

“Ryan.” He couldn’t keep the disappointment out of his voice. He knew he was a monster. What else would Ryan think? “No, I wouldn’t. How could I be with you if I did that? You’d never trust me again.”

“But you said I wouldn’t notice. Hell, Will, even if I did feel it, it’s doubtful I’d know what was happening.”

“Is that how you think I am?” Maybe it was how he seemed. He’d never been shy about reading other people’s minds when he needed to. “Don’t answer that. You have every right to think that way, but no, I wouldn’t do it unless you said I could or you were unconscious and I needed to so I could help you.”

The small cabin was quiet, so still Will could hear Ryan’s heartbeat without trying. He counted five beats before Ryan leaned over and planted a quick kiss on his cheek. Sniffing, Ryan brushed the back of his hand over his face.

“Sorry, I shouldn’t have asked that.”

“I once said you could ask whatever you want. That’s still a good offer.” He spared a moment to wink at Ryan.

“No, I meant, I shouldn’t have doubted you. You treat me like I’m the most special person in the world….”

“You are to me.”

“I know. You show me all the time.” He reached across and put his hand on Will’s leg. “Yes.”

“Yes?”

“You can check inside my head for the answers.” He gave a quick squeeze with his fingers. “Just not while you’re driving.”

Covering Ryan’s hand with his, he couldn’t stop the smile. “Deal.”

A
LMOST
forty years
. Will stared at the gate blocking their way. The house looked the same, the ground a bit different, but it had the same shape and layout. At least it hadn’t been neglected.

“You grew up here?” Wide-eyed, Ryan switched between Will and the house.

“Yes. My brother and his wife own it now.” He rolled down the window and pressed the intercom. The scrambler had been turned off since they reached the Bryn Mawr township line. Maybe they’d recognize the car, but he disappeared thirty-nine years ago. Maybe they wouldn’t.

“Yes? May I help you?” Older, much older, and tired sounding, but the voice was still his brother’s.

“Tom, it’s me, Will.” How long had it been since he’d said that? This time, however, the words scared him.

Will’s nervous, edgy anticipation was mirrored on Ryan’s face.

“Will? It’s really you?” The voice sounded shaky, unsure.

“Of course it’s me. Tom, we talked earlier today.” The hint of annoyance escaped before he could hold it back.

Ryan patted Will’s hand that rested on the stick shift. “Will, don’t get mad. He’s probably still in shock.”

The heavy wrought-iron gate slowly pulled back.
This is it
. He waited until the gate opened all the way and edged the gear into first. The drive to the main house felt longer. Each bush seemed larger, fuller, hiding more of his past.

“Nervous?”

Had he been that obvious? Probably. He wasn’t letting Gar control him. “A bit. I’m not sure how to react to them.”

“Just be yourself.” Ryan had a glint in his eye, like he was enjoying this trip.

“I’m planning on it. That’s the problem. I’m still twenty-six.” He almost turned to the car barn, where he used to park when he lived here. Before he let old habits kick in, he swung left and stopped in front of the portico. The half-expected welcoming committee wasn’t there, but he noted movement by the window.

“They’re watching us.” Ryan followed his eyes to the window by the door.

Will opened the car door but didn’t swing it wide. Why was he so afraid to talk to his family?

“Probably want to know who I am and why I’m here.” When Ryan didn’t move to open his door, Will wondered again if it was a mistake asking him along.

“Did you want to stay in the car?”
Hopefully you don’t.

Ryan shook his head quickly. “N-no .” He quickly opened the door. “Don’t leave me here.”

“I wasn’t leaving you, just giving you the option to back out.” After stepping onto the gravel path, Will froze, staring at his feet. So little had changed since the last time. Same driveway, same crunching under his feet, same white columns waiting for him to pass.

Over the hood of the car, Ryan stared at him, looking unsure. No, a lot had changed. Crossing to the front, he held out his hand. The smile he received calmed him.
Definitely not the same as last time.

Halfway to the house, he stopped.

Ryan took another step but couldn’t pull Will along with him. “Will? What’s wrong?”

“I can hear them talking.” He knew it was a bad idea not changing his appearance. “They think this is a setup.”

“Oh no.”

Ryan had suggested coming. It didn’t take a super brain to know he felt responsible. “This is not your fault, Ryan. It’s been over thirty years since they’ve seen me, and I haven’t changed.”

“Should we go?”

“No.” Shaking his head, he focused his hearing inside the house. “They’re coming to the door now.”

With a gentle squeeze on Ryan’s hand, he started walking. If his brother didn’t open the door first, he’d knock, but he doubted it’d get that far. Halfway up the eight steps, the door creaked open, revealing his brother and sister-in-law, standing taut, side by side.

God, he looks so like Dad.
Even the hair had turned gray the same way. Abby hadn’t let age rob her of her grace, poise, or beauty. She’d managed to keep trim and looked far younger than her almost seventy years.

He and Ryan stopped two steps from the top. “Hello, Tom, Abby.”

The grip on his hand tightened, forcing him to turn his head. “This is my friend, boyfriend, Ryan.”

“Who are you? And what sick game are you playing?” Tom directed his words at Will. His older brother hadn’t changed, still blunt and to the point. “You can’t really be him, no matter how close a resemblance. I lost my brother decades ago.”

“Tom, listen to me, hear my voice. Could someone fake that too? It’s me, Will.” Tom reacted, his face going from anger to surprise. “Right before David died, something happened to me. This happened to me. It’s why I disappeared. Look at me, hear me, touch me, ask me anything you want, but it’s me. Remember all the questions you asked me when I called? Could an impostor fake all that?”

Tom kept running his gaze up and down. Finally, his shoulders slumped and he exhaled. “Will?”

“It’s me, Tom.” He nodded, hoping to convince his brother he was real. “Want me to show you the spot we buried Herman? Or the branch you pushed me off and I broke my arm? Or anything else you can think of.”

Tears welled up in Tom’s eyes. “It’s just impossible. How can this be?” His brother’s voice was barely a whisper.

“Tom, I told you when I called, you needed to believe the impossible.” Spreading his arms out, he stepped away from Ryan. “Mr. Impossible.”

Snorting, Tom rolled his eyes. “Well, that’d certainly be something ol’ Will would say.” His brother’s tense composure slackened, and Will released a pent-up breath. He was beginning to believe.

Maybe coming was too much too soon. “I can come back another day if you need time to think this over. I know it’s a lot to digest.”

Tom shook his head and stepped back from the door. After mouthing his brother’s name, he said, “Come inside. Let’s talk there.”

D
RAINING
the last of his water, Will watched the emotions play across his brother’s face. It was a fantastic tale, and he knew just how crazy it sounded, but it was close enough to the truth that he knew he could sell it to them.

“You work for the government?” There was just enough disbelief in his brother’s voice for Will to work with. Ryan knew the story they were peddling if anyone asked him.

“No, Tom. I don’t work for anyone.” The problem was trying to explain it without telling them the whole truth.

“But, you said….” His brother shook his head, looking confused.

“Here, let me show you something.” Standing, he nodded to Ryan. “Stay still.”

A hand on either side of the large overstuffed couch, he hoisted it, and Ryan, chest high. The open mouths told him he’d made his point. But he had more. He reset the furniture and took the knife from the cheese board.

“Will….” Ryan’s cry didn’t stop him. In a fluid motion, he slammed the tip into his left pectoral muscle. The knife bent and broke, clattering on the hardwood floor, drawing all eyes to it.

“Like I said, I’ve changed.” Will stared at the remains of the knife and shrugged. “I owe you a new knife, brother.”

Quicker than Will expected, Ryan was standing in front of him, hand running over the fabric of his shirt.

“Why do you do that?” Anger flared behind the soft brown eyes. “You know I hate that.”

“Sorry.” Gently, he ran his hand over Ryan’s. “It’s easier to show than to explain.”

Silence continued for nearly a minute. “So when you said someone recruited you and changed you, does that….”

“Don’t ask for specifics, Tom. It’s better you don’t know.” Meeting his brother’s stare, he shook his head. “What you don’t know, you can’t tell.”

“You just don’t want me to know the truth.” The accusation was expected, but still hurt.

“No, I don’t. But it’s better for you both if you don’t know, as well.”

“Bloody hell, Will!” Tom stood and moved around his wife’s chair. Roughly, he ran his hand through his hair, grimacing with the effort. “You’re some secret agent?”

“I never said that.”

He pointed his finger at his brother. “Don’t use that lawyer mumbo jumbo on me. I’m not stupid.”