Princess Ces'alena (31 page)

Even though she had to look up at Katherine, there was no fear in her, Katherine took note, swallowing nervously. “We can settle this now you and I-…”

“Mama come on.” Mike pleased.

“…- you think I fear you? Would you like to try me…because as mad as you think you are, it is not enough to keep me from knocking you on your delicately privileged ass. Whatever price I pay for it, I will pay gladly! My son,
Manny’s
son…will always be, he was here long before you were even a consideration. Come on, let us clear the air, why do you really think, you’re hear? Because he
wanted - you?
Save yourself all of this, we – I – was here first, and there is nothing you can do about it.” With clear disdain, she eyed Katherine up and down boldly.

Katherine’s hatred for her simmered to such a level, it bordered on evil. She itched to slap the insolence from her face as she had her son’s. The facts however, were abundantly clear, she was protected by Manny, as was the child. She did not have the same fears as other slaves; there was no discipline to be found when she stepped out of line. Katherine knew, she was not beyond being attacked, on that plantation, she was out numbered, she could only wonder, would they all attack her? Even now, she stood staring her down, daring her to go one step further – due to the mistrust of them all, Katherine sucked it in.

“Mama, please…let’s just go…please.” Mike pleaded at his mother’s side. “Yes, I think we had better.” This time, slowly, she turned as he held onto her hand pulling her towards the stairs.

Unable to turn back and leave it, feeling humiliation to the highest degree, Katherine regained a thread of her dignity saying, “Yes, I think you’d better.” Once, more her anger resurfaced. They all reached the stairs, Lena taking them with her skirt in one hand, the other holding the banister while descending like the royal she felt in her heart she was; her son in front of her.

With distance between them, Katherine felt a rise in her stamina, hating everything there was about Lena along with the audacity of her leaving with her head held high, shoulders square, that was an insult in itself.

Katherine leaned over the top banister, calling down, so angry that tears were in her eyes, “Lena?!” Who stopped at the bottom looking up at her. “Hear what I say! Somehow, some way, I will be rid of you, know that I will!”

Feeling her words unworthy of consideration, Lena looked away not wanting to argue further. Furious at being ignored, Katherine rushed down the top of the stairs, “Did you hear me?!!” She screamed again, holding onto her skirts as she made to descend. “I said -…ai-i-i-i-i-i-i-ie-e-e-eee!!!” Her bone chilling scream pierced the air as the sound of her body was heard rolling and bumping down the long broad stairway.

Mike and Lena turned in time to see her twist and roll, her arms and legs tangled in the lengths of her gown as she fell. Horror and shock shot through Lena as panic set her heart to hammering, adrenaline ricocheting madly through her. “Oh my God!! Oh my God, nooooo!!” Lena screamed as Katherine’s body came to a stop at the bottom of the stairs, twisted in an unnatural position; falling in her wake, with small taps to stop a few steps above her, one of Mikey’s toy soldiers.

“Oh noooo, goooooo – run Mikey, get help noooow!!!”
Lena screamed at him shaking. Mikey lit out in a mad dash, tears running down his face, wondering if this was all a nightmare. One that he prayed would soon end; knowing this would be one nightmare in his life, he would never forget.

Lena felt bile rise to her throat, her pulse so rapid in her head, she felt faint. She couldn’t ever remember a time in her life when she felt so afraid. She ran to Katherine, swiping at the tears that blinded her. Kneeling beside her, Lena called her name, her voice trembling in a crying pant. “Katherine? Oh please, wake up!”
She brushed the hair from her face gently. Katherine was lying on her back with her feet still up on the last few steps. Her left arm was bent awkwardly beneath her body and the right arm over her head, where a gash lay open and bleeding. Blood also drew a streamline from her mouth where she had bitten her tongue on the way down. Afraid to touch her, Lena rocked moaning, shaking and praying. “Oh God, please, please, please, please…help her God, please help her. I’m so sorry, so sorry – please don’t let this be happening!” She whimpered sick to the stomach.

She sat back on her haunches not knowing what to do for her. She was afraid to move her. She stared down through blurred vision at the still form before her knowing this was going to bring about harsh consequences; unsure of how or in what way that would be, but she knew, a change was now going to come. Her peripheral picked up the toy that was Mike’s. Without thought, she stumbled over Katherine to grab it, and then stuffed it into her pocket. Going back to her knees, at that point, she heard the front door open.

Morris and Manny were home, she heard them walking from the foyer, and heard them stop and gasp. She didn’t have to look up to know what scene registered in their minds.

“Godalmighty, what have you done!!” Morris shouted.

Lena turned with tears streaming down her face, both of the men a blur. “I’m sorry…I’m so sorry! We argued again, she came down the steps behind me, and fell.”

“You lying little witch, you pushed her! Admit it! Damn you!!!”

“Nooo, I didn’t…I swear to you I didn’t!!” She sobbed as Manny ignored his father rushing to Katherine. “Manny…please …I would never hurt her; I wouldn’t…not when she’s carrying your child…please bel-…”

“Get away from her you lying-…” Morris charged forward to push Lena away, when Manny stood blocking him. “This is not the time!! She needs help – this isn’t helping her!!” He yelled; then turning from his father, he knelt beside Katherine.

“This is my fault, I shouldn’t have gone up those stairs, it is my fault, I shouldn’t have argued with her, I’m so sorry…I’m so sorry.” Lena cried over and over. Manny was carefully straightening Katherine’s legs, gently pulling them flat to the floor, then ran his hands over her ribs up to the oddly bent arm; he knew it was broken. Taking a deep breath he carefully lifted her unconscious body, as Morris railed at him.

“Now do you see!! She tried to kill you wife!! Your unborn child!!! When is it going to be enough for you too see Manny!?! When is it going to be enough!?!” He raged following up the stairs, Lena was trailing listening, crying with panic. They all quickly entered the bedroom and finally Manny gently laid her to the bed. They could hear loud pounding up the stairs just then; Mikey returned with Henry and Leon.

“Boy – you get to town now! Fetch a doc back here now!!”

“No! There’s no time! Get Ma’Nicey!” Lena cried out; she was too close to Morris, he turned and back handed her to the floor, his voice a roar as he shouted. “So she can finish her off you bitch!?”

“Don’t hit my mother, you leave her alone!!” Mike screamed; running to his mother’s side. Manny charged between them and his father.

“That is the last time you’ll be doing that!?” Turning he picked a distraught Lena up. “Henry, take her to her cabin. Then you and Amos go for the physician. Mikey, you go with your mother son.” He then turned to Leon.

“Go get Ma’Nicey! Hurry!”

Turning back to his silent father, “I need you to leave this room.”

“She tried to kill your wife. You heard her with your own ears!” Morris charged. “No! She said she was sorry…” Manny defended. “…Katherine followed her and fell.”

“I knew the minute I laid eyes on her — she the devil’s own, them yellow eyes of hers say so!” Morris repeated over and over heading for the door; Manny grappled with thin patience not to lash out at his father; he slammed the door closing him out; turning he went back to his wife’s side.

* * *

“Here, drink this, it will help you sleep.” Manny offered to an unresponsive Katherine. For days he had been there by her side, administering to her needs; doing all possible within his power to get some reaction from her. He knew the hurt she was feeling was great from the loss of their child. He felt it too, though he had never been in love with her, he would never do anything to harm a child that was his own. He had gone through it before, and now again. So it was not new to him, nor was it as hard for him to accept. He sat beside her out of the guilt he felt. His stress was in knowing he never wanted Katherine to conceive in the first place. Stupid drunkenness and his temper had made that possible. But since she had, he accepted it. Curiosity mixed with fears and misgivings over how he would manage to be a father to the child, when he knew his plans to leave and take Lena with him; as well the children they shared had plagued him. Like when they left, would he have been able to leave it behind? He even contemplated taking it from her, so Lena could raise it. He knew she would have done so willingly; loving it as she did their own; then, he felt it cruel to take a child from its mother.

As Katherine, grew and advanced in her pregnancy, so had the pressures of his responsibilities toward the child. Now he sat trying to console her, when all he felt was relief. When the physician had come out and told him the child was no more, instead of feeling grief for the loss, there had been the lifting of a tremendous burden. He’d prayed for God to forgive him for feeling as he did, lie to others he could, but never to himself. Truth of it was, it wasn’t the child that he felt relief in losing, but that undeniable link or hold that would make him somehow forever more committed to Katherine. He didn’t love her, he could never love her, they were not meant to be. He simply wanted all of this to be over. Sitting back in the chair that sat at her bedside, he placed the warm milk on the small table. His heart ached for the hurt his life had inadvertently caused her; he should have never married her…so much regret.

May, 1810

As the weeks rolled by, Katherine’s self-seclusion remained unchanged. She shut everyone out, even her Aunt and cousin; who tried over and over to visit and bring her out of it for the last two months, but all attempts failed.

Manny had long since given up trying to console her; she made it quite clear that she resented him even trying. All of her meals were brought up to her room and left at the door by Cora or Kayleen. She wouldn’t let them in, even to clean it. Her days were spent staring out the window, and her nights weeping over the loss of her child and the misery of her life.

Depression and pity was her closest companion, since all else left her to wallow alone. Morris and Manny were not speaking since the miscarriage; they had a major fight over his allowing Lena, so Morris felt, get away with murdering his unborn child. According to Morris, she did it to keep and maintain her hold on Manny. He held steadfastly his belief that she practiced the black arts, and they were all doomed. Every time he tried to convince his son of this, it ended pretty much the same as when it started, with Manny threatening to leave the plantation for good; taking Lena, the unborn child and Mike with him. As much as Morris would have loved to call his bluff, there was something valid about Manny’s threats that made him believe he would actually do it, with little choice, he backed off. Nothing frightened him more, than the humiliation of his son deserting him, the plantation and all he’d given him, over the slave. Not to mention the fear of losing his son, as much as they argued, he couldn’t stand the thought of his son leaving him. He was all that he had…he loved him, bewitched or not, he could not run this plantation without him.

* * *

It was a calm Tuesday afternoon, in the month of July; Manny was out of town in the process of purchasing his first brand new ship, freshly built to his specifications. He’d traveled all the way to Boston to speak to whom he’d been referred to as the best when it came to building ships of the magnitude he was looking for. This one was special…it was the one his family would live on. Though there was still so very much to be done before he could take action on his promises to Lena, he was laying the foundation for their lives together.

July in Mississippi meant heat! Heavy, sweltering moist heat; few slaves were found in the fields, because Manny would let no one drop from the intense humidity over crops that were yet to be in full yield. To escape the heat of the kitchen, Kayleen and Lena sat at the back of the mansion in the shade shelling peas. For the first time in weeks, Katherine was forced from her room by the oppressive rising temperatures.

It was unbearable, not a breeze seemed to stir; even with all of her windows open. She dare not step out onto the veranda, it at the moment was bathed in the sun, where vapors rose from the intense baking of every surface it scalded. Finally, defeated she gave up her sanctuary to walk into the cool shade of the trees, leaving from the front door without anyone knowing she’d ever left her room.

Most of Webster Fields young men had taken off for the front pond, which was located not far off Okala road, hidden in a large shroud of weeping willows and maple trees. Mike was among them, this pond being the larger and deeper of the two; providing the much needed relief. Shaded as they were, they had a good time swimming and dunking each other. Their laughter rang out through the wooded area without a care in the world; blissfully content and unaware of the hated gaze that resented their laughter and happiness.

How could it be that everyone else on Webster Fields were so happy, when she was so miserable? How could they dare laugh, when she would never hear the laughter of her dead child? Standing behind a tall oak, her head throbbed with the agonizing memory of waking to severe cramps; so intense she doubled over in pain as her child was forcefully purged from her body. Screaming and begging for the physician to make it stop…there had been nothing he could do to stop it. One hand flew to her mouth to silence the sob that choked her at the thought; the other went to her stomach, which should have been rounded now; swollen with her son or daughter. Yet there
stood Lena’s son, poised on a fallen tree trunk, readying himself to take a dive. Again she choked back a sob crying,