Positive/Negativity (34 page)

Just the thought of that plain, bitch girl made her jaw clench with the resentment she felt. Her hands tightened on the steering wheel as thoughts of revenge began to form in her mind.

Marisol would make Declan pay for the embarrassment he caused her. Clients were beginning to whisper and talk about why they weren’t seen together. She would not tolerate that! She would win him back and she would make him grovel and crawl for her forgiveness…but thoughts of exacting revenge on the girl were what gave her pleasure. She felt a smile lift the corners of her mouth, feeling physical, sensual pleasure as she mentally exacted her revenge on that ugly girl.

A hundred times, she’d thought of that girl, and each time, a different means of taking her revenge formed in her mind. Those sordid and pleasing thoughts were becoming more and more frequent.
Would she only make her suffer by watching as Marisol took Declan away from her? No! That would only make her cry. The puta deserved to be hurt in a way that was more public.

Maybe Marisol would corner
her
in a bathroom and slice her face, slowly, marring her features and whatever attraction it was that Declan found appealing. That would ensure that she’d be repulsive to Declan and any other man who’d be
stupid
enough to enter into a relationship with her. Maybe Marisol should injure other parts of her so severely that she’d be unable to enter any relationship.
Oh, yes…

Her scheming thoughts were bringing her such a pleasure and contentment that she hadn’t felt in quite some time. She sat back and relaxed into her thoughts. She resigned to herself that she’d find an opportunity and create the perfect scenario where she would make sure that she would give the little beach whore
exactly
what was coming to her—and it
wouldn’t
be Declan.

He had embarrassed Marisol. She’d never forget that, but she also couldn’t forget how handsome he was and how badly she wanted him. Why he didn’t want her, she couldn’t understand. Everyone wanted her! She had let him get away with playing games with her, but now she’d be the one playing games.
He would want her again!! She would make him!
She remembered how close he held himself to her when they shot the photos on the island. She could feel how hot he was…
how firm he was…

All thoughts of Declan made Marisol feel so sexually hot but affectionately cold. She’d
never
give him affection, but she’d take his body instead. Once he had a taste of
her,
he’d
never
want another woman.
She
was the beautiful woman in all the photographs with him.
She
was the women responsible for bringing out the sexuality that Declan had kept hidden, and she’d be dammed if someone else would reap the benefits!

Marisol would help him to find his way back to her and the pleasures that only she could have given him when he spent more time in the city. He didn’t belong here in this sand town. He just needed to feel her body, hot and close to him again…and his memory would take over.
Then
his body would respond…and she would
NOT
allow him to touch her…to have her…to take her…as all men wanted…as all men did…

…
She would take him
…

Her thoughts made her body writhe and squirm in her seat, and she ran her tongue over her lips.
Yes
, she thought as she brought her hand down and placed it on the seat between her thighs.

Yes, her plan would work. Her Declan would never want the sea whore ever again. She’d never be disregarded by Declan or that fat, puta again, and his house, The Studio, and everything that he owned would belong to her.

…and as Aria and Declan enjoyed giant crashing waves, enjoyed small talk and tasted pancakes, a sadistic mentality was brewing a violent storm…

T
Beautiful Girls – Bruno Mars

TT
Beautiful – Carly Rae Jepsen

Looking through some real estate listings, I was alerted to Paige’s arrival as I heard Rita escorting her to join me.

“Let me show you girls to your table so that you can catch up,” she said as she guided us back to a corner table. “Have a nice lunch, ladies,” Rita said as she left us.

“We will,” we both said in unison, making all three of us laugh.

“Hey, girl! It’s so good to see you. I’ve missed you!” I said, greeting Paige. We hadn’t seen each other since the gala at The Studio. I’d been busy with my own business, and life with Declan always kept me happily occupied. Paige had been busy with her business, as well as a few dates. This was the first opportunity we’d been able to coordinate to meet.

“I’ve missed you too! It seems like it’s been ages!” she said as the waiter came over to take our drink order.

Once he’d gone from the table, I turned my attention back to her. “So tell me, what’s new in your world?”

“Not much,” she said, flipping her hair back over her shoulder. “Same old, same old. Dating a little and working a lot. What about you?”

“Always busy, it seems. I’m always up and down Coastal Highway, checking on different renovations. When Declan isn’t busy with The Studio, he goes away on location shoots. What little time he spends home, I like to spend with him.”

“How’s everything going with The Studio? Is Declan happy with how everything’s working out?”

The subject brought a smile to my face. “Everything looks promising. Declan’s very focused on building the business and developing new talent. He and Aimee have been meeting with some very promising young people, and the studio space has been booked by both local photographers and those traveling here for photo shoots.”

“It sounds as if it’s going better than you expected,” Paige said as our waiter dropped off our drinks and took our order.
T

I leaned back in my chair. “I’m not exactly sure what I expected, to tell the truth,” I confided to her. “Declan was concerned that there would be a big rush of activity in the beginning and worried that it would then slow down. That seems to still be his concern. He won’t turn down any opportunity for prospective business. He’s more “money-minded” these days. On more than one occasion, I got the impression that he may have interviewed a few people when he didn’t want to. I’m not sure I like the idea that he might be compromising himself, or his values, but he knows his industry. I just have to trust him.” I shook off the uneasy feeling I had when I thought of that. “Anyway, he and Aimee are always coming and going. They have a contact in New York that sends them potential models to be interviewed, as well as photographers that may be traveling up or down the East Coast. It’s definitely busy.”

She took a sip of her drink and placed the glass down on the table to look at me. “Is that a good thing? Are you happy?”

“You know, Paige, I
am
happy. I feel content. Peaceful. Being with Declan has made a change in me. Don’t misunderstand, we have our ups and downs like everyone else, but because of him, I see
myself
differently.”

Paige stopped eating her roll and gave me an incredulous look. “How so, sweetie? I’ve known you forever. You’ve always been great. You don’t need to be different.”

“If I were on the outside looking in, I’d never picture someone like Declan being with someone like me.”

She interjected, “Oh, Aria…”

“No, let me finish. You can’t tell me you don’t have some insecurities, Paige. All women, not just me, look in mirrors every day and don’t see the beauty,
their true beauty
, reflecting in return. They can only see their flaws. I’m no exception and still fall into that trap. Don’t you?”

She nodded her head in agreement. “I do. I admit it.”

“We all fall victim. Almost every woman I know does.” Continuing to confess to Paige, I detected a sorrowful tone in my voice, “I used to take mental inventory when I looked in the mirror of what I needed to fix on my body. It was such a habit that I didn’t realize I performed self-examination nearly every time I was naked. It could have been something as mundane as telling myself I needed to lose a few pounds or as critical as contemplating plastic surgery.”

She sat back in her chair and appeared defensive.
TT

“You know that I’ve had plastic surgery. Are you judging me?”

“No, no…not at all. If you have plastic surgery for the right reason, and you aren’t trying to meet someone else’s expectation of what you should look like, then it can be a good thing. If there’s something about yourself that you’re unhappy with and you want to do it to make you feel more confident in yourself, then you should do it. That
is
why you did it, right? Not to make someone else happy.”

She shook her head in affirmation.

“If I felt uncomfortable about myself, I wouldn’t hesitate to take action to feel more confident. If that was working out every day, eating healthier, or plastic surgery, I’d do whatever I needed to do for me—not someone else and their perception of what I should be.”

“I agree with you, but Aria, I always thought you were happy with yourself. You seemed so confident. Even when we were younger, I always thought you were so sweet and pretty.”

“Most women are very good actresses. They let you see what they want you to see,” I said. “Sweet, pretty, and confident. Isn’t that how women want other women to see them? I’m no exception, but I was living a lie. Each time I examined myself in the mirror, I tore myself to shreds. Honestly? Declan helped me to change that.”

She smiled and shook her head at me. “Do you realize that you smile every time you say his name?”

Her statement made me feel warm inside.

“He
does
make me smile. Other than making me fall in love with him, the difference that he has made in my life is that he opened my eyes to the difference between manufactured beauty and true beauty.”

Her eyes were a bit misty. “It makes me sad to think of you as insecure, Aria. I’ve always been beautiful, both inside and out.”

“But I didn’t see myself that way—ever. I’m beginning to see myself that way more and more because he constantly calls me ‘Beautiful’. I’m not going to say that I don’t have days that I think my thighs are a bit too dimpled or my hair is too curly, but I’m learning to love them as uniquely me. I’m a person who loves, genuinely loves, the people in her life. They are my gifts. I’ve realized there are many definitions of beauty, and I won’t ever hold myself to the same definition that I once did.”

I thought for a few minutes, took a few bites, and then continued.

“Paige, you knew my dad. My father went to his death losing his body piece by piece. He thought less of himself because of the amputations, but it didn’t make me love
him
any less. It didn’t make my mom love him any less. We both know that my mom can be a bit overprotective at times, and she admits that she can be a bit assertive, but it doesn’t make me love
her
any less. Declan is handsome and adored by countless women for how he looks, which can be a real pain to his girlfriend, but it doesn’t make me love him any less. If he weren’t good on the inside, it wouldn’t matter to me how good looking he was; in my eyes he would be gross.”