Point of No Return (39 page)

Morning had sunshine streaming in through the windows and I woke with a stretch. Amazingly enough, I wasn’t very sore. My ankles and wrists hurt, but other than that my body was okay. Surprisingly, I hadn’t had any nightmares. Maybe that had been because my subconscious knew James was dead and therefore no longer presented a threat, or maybe it was because I’d been with Kade, or maybe both, but my sleep had been peaceful.

I heard the low rumble of Kade’s voice and got out of bed. He’d nearly closed the French doors dividing the sitting room from the bedroom, leaving them open a scant inch. I realized he was talking to someone on the phone.

I brushed my teeth and used the bathroom, using my fingers to try and tame my hair, before I emerged from the bedroom. Kade glanced up from where he sat in an armchair, but kept talking.

“Yeah. It was close,” he said. “Too close. And you’re going to want to burn that bed. I never want to lay eyes on it again.”

I grimaced, then spotted the pot of coffee Kade must have ordered from room service. I poured myself a cup and listened to him talk.

“Chance took care of it,” Kade said. “And Gerard’s planning on fixing the door today.” He paused, listening. “Yeah, she’s right here. Hold on.” He held his cell phone out to me. “Blane wants to talk to you.”

I was suddenly nervous as I took the phone from him. Did Blane know everything that had happened the past few weeks? Had Kade told him we were married now?

“Hey,” I said softly.

“Kat,” Blane said, releasing a sigh, “Kade told me what happened. Jesus. I’m so sorry, Kat.”

“It’s not your fault,” I said. “Just like I told Kade. No one could have predicted he’d go so far off the deep end. I just want to forget it and move on.”

Blane was quiet for a moment. “Then I won’t mention it again, okay?”

“I’d appreciate that,” I replied. James was part of the past now.

Blane cleared his throat. “I hear congratulations are in order,” he said. “Kade told me you two made it official. Mrs. Kade Dennon.”

Hello, awkward. My stomach felt like I’d swallowed a ten-pound rock. “Um, yeah,” I said. “I
. . .
yeah, we did.”

“I’m really happy for you, Kat,” Blane said, and if I hadn’t known him so well, he might’ve fooled me.

“It’s okay not to be. You don’t have to lie,” I said, drifting to look out the window. “I understand.”
After all, if things had worked out differently, I’d be Mrs. Blane Kirk instead.
It was unspoken, but I could hear his thought as though he’d said it aloud.

We were both quiet for a moment.

“I, um, I hear you’ll probably replace the senator,” I said, changing the subject. “That’s really something. Congratulations.”

“Yes. Unexpected, but I think if it happens, I’ll accept the appointment.”

I wondered if he would have accepted it if he and I had still been together. “So you’ll be in Washington from now on,” I said, my heart sinking. “Not Indy.”

“For a while,” Blane said. “The session’s already begun, so it’ll probably be a few months before I make it home.”

“So by Christmas, you think?” I asked.

“Maybe,” he hedged. I didn’t push.

More silence, but I was loath to say goodbye. Finally, Blane spoke again.

“I love you,” he said, his voice roughened, “and I’m glad you’re okay, all three of you.”

“Me too,” I replied, my own voice hardly above a whisper.

Blane cleared his throat again. “Okay, well, tell Kade I’ll talk to him later.”

“Okay.”

“Take care of yourself. Take care of Kade.”

“I will. I promise.”

“Goodbye, Kat.”

“Bye, Blane.”

Then he was gone, the call ended. I stared blindly out the window and blinked back the tears.

C
HAPTER
T
WENTY

I
don’t even want to know how much you paid for these tickets,” I said.

Kade just winked at me. “It’s the least I could do. Especially since I’m the reason you missed your pop princess in Indy.”

We were in the front row of the Sprint Center in Kansas City, waiting for Britney to come onstage. The tickets and backstage passes Blane had given me last Christmas had been for her show in Indy, but Kade had gotten shot and I’d been at the hospital constantly, thus missing the concert. I hadn’t said anything at the time—as much as I loved Britney, Kade nearly dying had consumed all my thoughts and attention—but Kade had eventually figured it out.

So now, two months later, we were in Kansas City for her show and somehow Kade had scored front row center seats. He’d begged me to wear my Britney costume from last Halloween, but I’d put my foot down. Skimpy Catholic schoolgirl outfit would normally be sexy;
pregnant
Catholic schoolgirl was just not, no matter what Kade insisted to the contrary.

I was too excited to sit, so I stood, leaning against the tall fence that separated the front row from the stage. The show should start any minute now. The opening act had finished and the stage looked nearly set up for Britney.

The past couple of months had been a whirlwind. Kade and I had bought a house and begun, again, to decorate a room for the baby. I didn’t want to sell the house I’d bought in Rushville, though. That house had been something I’d done on my own when I’d realized I was strong enough to do what needed to be done to raise our child by myself. We still went there occasionally for the weekend.

Charlie hadn’t seemed to mind that I’d had to quit my job so quickly after I’d started, citing how I was pregnant and married and lived in Indy, but then again, it was hard to tell with him. I thought I’d seen him crack a tiny smile before he turned away.

Kade didn’t exactly love visiting Rushville, but he humored my desire to keep ties to my hometown. Though people were slow to warm up to him, eventually they seemed to accept his presence by my side.

My lease was up on my old apartment and I’d been a little sad to move out. So much had happened there, good and bad. The afterimage of Blane and our time together seemed to be burned into the place and that made my chest hurt if I thought about it, so I didn’t.

Lewis had proposed, and he and Alisha were getting married at Christmas. I was thrilled for her. As a gift, and an apology, I’d made Kade buy them tickets to Hawaii and he was also footing the bill for their honeymoon there. I felt it was the least he could do after shooting Lewis. But the wound had healed and there was no lasting damage, thank goodness, so I thought all was okay between the four of us. Though I didn’t think either of them would probably ever look at Kade the same way again.

Blane had gotten that senate appointment, to the surprise of no one. Kade and I had watched on television as he’d been sworn into office.
Blane Kirk
was now a name that was nationally recognized, and his handsome face had graced the covers of several news magazines. The press seemed to love him, though I was sure that wouldn’t last. The gossip pages once again had photos of Blane with beautiful women on his arm, though the same one never seemed to appear twice.

Blane had escorted Vivian to Keaston’s funeral. The story that had been circulated was that the senator had suffered from terminal cancer and had decided to spare himself and his family the pain of a long, drawn-out illness. I didn’t care what story was put out to explain his death. I was just glad he was out of all our lives, permanently.

Kade and I had gone to James’s sparsely attended funeral. We’d stood at the graveside and I’d sprinkled a handful of dirt over the coffin. Closure. It was good for my mental health.

Clarice had been dumbfounded to hear about Kade and me, but she’d recovered quickly, wishing us happiness. I thought she was hiding disappointment that Blane and I hadn’t worked out, which I understood. She was loyal to both Blane and Kade, but I knew she held a special place in her heart for Blane and wanted to see him happy. So did I.

Chance wasn’t nearly as quick to let the past go and I made sure it was just him and me when I told him the news. He’d been stunned.

“You’re married?” he’d asked, his eyes wide with disbelief. “To
Kade Dennon
, an assassin?” The utter outrage in his voice had made me cringe.

I didn’t know if Chance would ever believe that Kade had left his old life behind, so we just took it day by day. I had to hope that, eventually, he would see the good in Kade the same way I had.

Kade treated me like gold, and he had been true to his word about leaving his old career behind and focusing on work that was legal and had zero chance of him ending up either dead or in prison. Initially, I’d been somewhat worried that his old life might cause problems, but it seemed that being an assassin was a lonely and secretive profession. He’d asked Branna to help him put out some rumors that he’d been killed on a job and it seemed he was right—no one came seeking the truth.

“So how about Aidan?” he asked in my ear, his arms wrapping around me from behind.

I leaned my head back against his chest, turning my head to look up at him. I made a face. He rolled his eyes.

“You don’t know it’s going to be a boy,” I said. We’d decided not to find out the sex of the baby and picking a name was an ongoing discussion, especially since Kade was convinced it was a boy.

“Yes, I do,” he said. “Trust me. I know things.”

It always made me smile when he said stuff like that and I laced my fingers through his as they rested on my abdomen.

“How about Tripp?” he asked.

I didn’t even bother responding to that one. “If you’re so sure it’s a boy,” I said, “that means I’ll have two of you to handle, so I think I should get to name him.”

Kade looked at me skeptically. “I don’t know. I wouldn’t want my son to end up with some name that could be a girl or a boy, like Jordan or Tory.”

“You don’t trust me?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Ooh, now you’re reaching for the big guns,” he teased, making me laugh. “All right, fine. If we have a boy, like I know we will, then you get naming rights.”

“Deal.”

We sealed it with a kiss and I was just getting into it when the lights went out. I jerked my mouth away.

“It’s time!” I said excitedly.

“You know, most women would rather kiss me than watch Britney Spears,” Kade chided me.

“I’ll make it up to you later,” I promised with a laugh.

“I’ll hold you to it,” Kade said, “because I also got you this.” He held something up in front of me as the stage lights came on and the music started.

“Backstage passes?” I cried. I turned and threw my arms around his neck. “You’re amazing!” I pressed a hard kiss to his mouth.

When I pulled back, Kade’s expression was soft, his eyes tender as he looked at me.

“No,” he said, “you are.”

E
PILOGUE

T
he pains began in the morning while I was drinking my coffee. Starting in my lower back and expanding around my abdomen, flaring in intensity, then fading. I knew what it was immediately and glanced at the clock. Another one came in ten minutes. I waited it out, breathing through my mouth and gripping the counter.

Once it passed, I took a shower. Kade was already in his office working and I knew he’d go apeshit the second I told him. He’d practically refused to leave the house the past couple of weeks, saying he just knew that the moment he left was when the baby would decide to come. The second I told him it was time, he’d have me hustled into the car and to the hospital. Well, I wanted to shower first and shave my legs.

I sat on the shower seat when another pain came, breathing through it, then finished rinsing my hair. I dressed in comfy clothes and blew my hair dry before pulling it back in a French braid. When I deemed myself ready and the contractions were about seven minutes apart, I went to find Kade.

He was typing away at the computer and the windows in the office were open, the warm spring air drifting in along with the scent of the daffodils and lilacs blooming outside. The first thing he’d done when we’d arrived back in Indy from our honeymoon was to buy me a beautiful two-story brick home surrounded by an expansive lawn dotted with trees. We weren’t in the country, like my little house in Rushville was, but there was enough space between us and neighbors that I didn’t feel boxed in.

“Good morning,” I said, sliding my arm across his shoulders.

Kade glanced up and smiled, turning his chair and tugging me down onto his lap. I wasn’t as dainty as I used to be, not with a nine-month pregnant tummy, but Kade seemed to love everything about it. His hand rested on top of my stomach. “‘Morning, princess,” he said, giving me a kiss. “How are you feeling today? Is the baby awake?”

I grinned. “Not only is the baby awake,” I teased, “but it’s time.”

It took a second for Kade to catch on, then his eyes went wide. “Now?”

I laughed. “Well, not right now, but hopefully by tonight it’ll all be over.”

That put Kade into high gear, as I’d known it would. In minutes he’d closed up the house, gotten my suitcase, called Mona, and was trying to hustle me to the car.

“Wait,” I said, “did you eat breakfast?”

He looked at me like I was insane. “You’re seriously not asking me if I’ve eaten, right?” he asked incredulously.

“Well, the hospital food is awful,” I said, thinking I was being perfectly reasonable and he was the one reacting all out of proportion. “You should eat something before we go.”

“Oh my God, Kathleen, just get in the car,” he moaned. “Please. Before I stuff you in it myself.”

“Will you relax?” I said in exasperation. “You act like we haven’t done this twice before.” Still, I got in the car before his face got any redder.

“If you think that makes it easier, it doesn’t,” he said firmly, sliding behind the wheel.

“Are the boys all right at Mona’s?” I asked.

“They’re fine,” Kade assured me, one corner of his mouth tipping up. “I told them their mommy and I were going to bring home their little sister and they were quite excited.”

“Nice that they were already there spending the night,” I said, then another pain hit and I gripped the door, breathing until it passed. I noticed Kade’s speed had increased while I’d been quiet.

“I’m fine,” I said, reaching for his hand. “Slow down. There’s plenty of time.”

Kade, for all his coolness under pressure, proved to be the typical husband when it came time for me to give birth. I thought that was because it was something out of his control, which he hated.

It took a little while to get me admitted and situated in a room, then all the equipment hooked up to me, the IV put in, yadda yadda. The pains were closer together now and I hoped that after having two babies, the third would arrive quickly.

It took a couple of hours, then the nurse proclaimed I was dilated enough for an epidural, and I heaved a sigh of relief. I knew lots of women did childbirth the natural way, but I was fine with the label of wimp. I wasn’t a fan of pain and if modern medicine had a way for me to avoid it, I was all about it.

Kade hated watching, though, his fear of needles making him extremely uncomfortable seeing one go into my spine. Of course he said he wasn’t afraid of needles, he just didn’t “like them,” though he’d never told me why.

I felt much better after the epidural and the next few hours passed relatively easily.

“Did you call Blane?” I asked Kade at one point.

“Yeah,” he said. “He was in a meeting, but I left him a voice mail.”

I nodded, a little disappointed, though I knew Blane was a very busy man. Blane was a US senator in his own right. After being appointed to fill the remainder of his great-uncle’s term, he’d run for election and won the seat. He’d inherited Keaston’s estate, which not only included the house in Georgetown but also his family home in Cambridge, where Vivian still lived, and a vacation home on Nantucket. Now Blane divided his time between DC and Nantucket with occasional visits to Indy. Congressional recess was coming, though, and he usually came back for a visit before taking our boys with him to Nantucket for two weeks every summer.

By late afternoon I was pushing and by dinner, Kade and I were holding the newest member of our family.

“You’re going to be insufferable now,” I teased Kade as he held our seven-pound, two-ounce little girl.

“I can’t help it if I was right,” he said, arching an eyebrow. “I told you. I know things.”

I just smiled. I was tired, though it had been an easy delivery. At least, easier than the first time I’d done this. That had taken hours and I’d thought Kade was going to kill someone when the epidural had worn off too soon and I’d felt every bit of the final stages of labor and delivery.

“She’s beautiful,” Kade said softly, rubbing a finger over one tiny cheek. “But not as beautiful as her momma.” His free hand reached for mine and he slotted our fingers together.

“Now there are two princesses,” I said, but he shook his head.

“You’ve just been promoted to queen.”

I laughed lightly. “My turn to hold her,” I said. Kade placed her carefully in my arms. Her hair wasn’t the usual newborn black but a shock of reddish gold that was just a shade lighter than mine. Her eyes were a beautiful, deep blue, though she was sleeping at the moment.

Flowers came, a huge display of two dozen pink roses that the nurse set on a table where I could see them.

“
‘Congratulations on the latest set of tiny, pattering feet,
’
” Kade read.
“
‘Love, Blane.
’
”

“That’s nice,” I said with a smile. The smell of roses drifted through the room.

It was close to ten when I let them take my baby girl back to the nursery. The nurses always offered to let the baby stay, but I knew better. This would be one of the last decent night’s sleep I’d get for a few months.

“Go home and get some sleep,” I told Kade. “Bring the boys in the morning.”

Kade leaned down and kissed me, his hand cupping my cheek. It was a lingering kiss and when he pulled back, he gazed into my eyes.

“You’re amazing,” he said softly, “and I love you. You know that, right?”

“Of course I do,” I replied. “I love you, too.”

“Are you happy?” he asked, his brows drawing together as he frowned slightly.

“Incredibly so.” I smiled. “You make me happy, Kade. You always have.”

Kade’s frown melted away and he kissed me again in a way that made me wish I hadn’t just given birth, but then again, he could always make me feel that way.

After he left, I didn’t fall asleep as quickly as I thought I would. It had been a recurring question from Kade over the years: Was I happy? It seemed Kade still had trouble sometimes believing all this—the house, the kids, our marriage. He’d told me once that he was so happy and content that it terrified him—it could so quickly be gone.

There wasn’t anything I could say to alleviate his fears, so when he got that way, I’d just hold him, tell him I loved him, then kiss him until he made love to me. He’d made all my dreams come true and I cherished each day because it was true—you never knew what the future held, but neither could you let the fear of it hold you captive.

Something woke me and I glanced around, figuring a nurse had come in, but it was a man’s silhouette that stood at the window.

I must’ve made a noise of alarm, because he turned and a shaft of light fell across his face. I breathed a relieved sigh.

“Blane,” I said, “you scared me to death.”

He walked to the bed and took my hand. “Sorry about that. And I’m sorry I couldn’t get here earlier.”

“It’s fine,” I said. “You’re here now. What time is it?”

“About three thirty,” he said.

“When did you get here?” I rubbed my eyes, glad the room was dark, because it wasn’t like I looked my best.

“About an hour ago.”

I pushed the button on my bed to move me to an upright position. “You didn’t have to come tonight,” I gently chided him. “You could’ve come in the morning.”

“Wanted to make sure you were all right,” he said, sitting down on the bed beside me. “And the baby.”

“Did Kade send you pictures?” I asked.

“He did.”

“Isn’t she beautiful,” I said with a smile. I leaned my head back on the pillow. The pain medicine was making me sleepy.

“She most certainly is,” Blane agreed, his lips turning up at the corners. His hold tightened on my hand. “I’m glad everyone’s healthy.”

“You’re an uncle again,” I said. “But I don’t think this one’s going to be as into fishing as the boys are.”

“Then I’ll have to find something else she’ll like just as much,” Blane said, reaching to tuck a lock of hair behind my ear.

My eyelids drooped. “I don’t know what we’d do without you,” I murmured.

Blane didn’t answer. The bed creaked and I felt his lips press against my forehead.

“Do you need anything?” he asked quietly. “Can I get you something?”

I pried open my eyes and shook my head. “No, I’m fine.” I smothered a yawn behind my hand.

“You should get some sleep,” Blane said, smoothing a few stray hairs back from my forehead.

I was pretty tired. “Okay. Will you be back in the morning?”

“I’ll stay,” Blane said. “I know how much you hate the hospital.”

I smiled. “That’s sweet of you,” I mumbled, my eyes slipping shut again. It was just way too hard to keep them open.

Blane tucked the blanket closer around me and lowered the bed again. I forced my mouth to move.

“I’m glad you’re here,” I murmured.

“Me too,” he said, the words so low I barely heard them, then I was out.

“Mommy!”

I looked toward the door as my youngest boy came hurtling toward me, only to get swept off his feet by Blane hoisting him in the air.

“Easy, buddy,” Blane said. “Your mommy’s a little fragile and so’s your new sister.” Blane gently sat him next to me on the bed.

“How’s Mommy’s Teddy Bear?” I asked him, leaning down and puckering up for a wet kiss.