Playing for Keeps (Texas Scoundrels) (21 page)

She moved out of his arms and the loss of heat made him want to pull her back. The forgotten mug of tea sat waiting on the counter, and she concentrated on removing the tea bag and dropping it into the garbage can.

“What do you want to hear?” she asked, a trace of bitterness filling her voice. “Do you want to hear that I was an idiot who lived a fairy tale that wasn’t there? Or would you rather hear how I was dumb enough to trust a man. My husband, no less?”

“What did that bastard do to you?”

“Screwed me for the last time.” Griffen wanted to tell him everything, but she couldn’t let down the barriers she’d erected over the past six months far enough to let out the truth. All her life she’d had someone who took care of her. She’d gone from her father’s care to Ross’s. Oh, she’d thought she’d been independent, but not really. At least not in the truest sense of the word. She’d been free to make her own choices, but she’d always had a safety net in case she fell. Now she was truly on her own, and she realized she wasn’t willing to relinquish that independence again. She had to prove to herself she was capable of running her own life. No matter how hard, no matter how many setbacks, she refused to allow anyone to hold that net for her ever again.

She looked at Jed. He stood silent, waiting for her answer. Waiting for her to give him a sign that she’d accept his offer. All she needed to do was say the word, and he would make her problems disappear.

Just take the money
.

She swallowed, trying to form a response that would make him understand she just couldn’t accept his help. He’d called her stubborn. True, but she was determined to prove her own self-worth. “I really do appreciate your offer, but I can’t accept it. I have to do this myself.”

“There’s nothing I can say to change your mind?” he asked. He didn’t look angry, just resigned. For that, she was grateful.

“No,” she said with a shake of her head. She reached for her cooled tea and took a sip. “Thank you for understanding.”

He rubbed at the back of his neck. “You’re a pain in the ass, you know that?”

She managed a smile. “I’m really not trying to be difficult. Just...smarter.”

He took a step toward her. The intensity in his eyes held her spellbound.
 

Taking the mug from her, he set it on the counter, then cupped her face between his palms. His hands were rough, warm, and she wanted them all over her body. A shiver of apprehension shimmied down her spine.

“I think you’re a fool for not letting me help you.”

She opened her mouth, but he placed his thumb over her lips, stilling her words.

“And I think you’re one of the most courageous people I’ve ever known.”

Courageous? Her? She didn’t think so. Not when her insides were jumping all over the place because he was touching her. “Is that a compliment, Maitland?” she whispered.

He leaned in close, his breath fanning her lips. His eyes darkened and her pulse quickened. He was going to kiss her, and she couldn’t, or wouldn’t, stop him even though Austin was a mere twenty-five feet away in the family room. Besides, after what she and Jed had done the night before, playing coy now would be more than a little hypocritical.
 

“Austin—”

“Is half asleep,” he said, dispelling her argument, seconds before his mouth pressed against hers. His tongue teased her lips, and she opened to him, mating her tongue with his.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and sighed. Kissing him back wasn’t smart, but a defensive line crashing through her kitchen would have been hard pressed to stop her from rubbing up against him like a cat in heat. There was no denying she wanted him in the most primal way possible. She wanted him hot and hard and inside her.

His hands moved from her face, down her sides, lightly teasing the swell of her breasts, to land on her ass. He urged her closer and she nearly purred when his arousal pressed against her belly.
 

Making love to Jed would be a mistake, but she didn’t care. Sex would only complicate their already complicated relationship. Their connection wasn’t elemental, their bond wasn’t born of mutual affection and attraction, but one which had evolved because of their relationship to a thirteen-year-old boy.

“Hey, Mom, do we have any...uh...excuse me.”

Griffen scooted away from Jed. Heat scorched her cheeks. “Do we have any what?” She managed to sound relatively calm, despite the wild beating of her heart and her embarrassment at being caught making out with Jed.
 

Austin’s glare was nothing short of hostile as he stormed into the kitchen. “Never mind,” he said, his tone insolent. “You’re
busy
.”
 

He didn’t wait for her to answer. He stalked to the fridge and yanked open the door.

“It’s late,” she told him. She didn’t want to make an issue out of it and decided the best course would be to discuss her and Jed going at it like a couple of hormonal teenagers when they were alone. “You should be getting ready for bed.”

The phone rang just as Austin slammed the refrigerator door closed. “Yeah, well, I’m not tired.”

She glanced at the Caller ID screen, but didn’t recognize the number, so she let it roll into voice mail. Jed grabbed hold of Austin’s arm and steered him over to the table and into a chair.
 

This was her fault. She should’ve talked to Austin sooner, but what would she have told him? That his mom needed to get laid? Hardly.

Jed stood with his arms crossed, his feet braced apart. “I don’t want to hear you talk to your mother that way again.”

Austin looked up at him, his expression the epitome of defiance. “You can’t tell me what to do.”
 

Jed let out an impatient breath. She could see his struggle to hold onto his temper and almost felt sorry him. Teenagers weren’t easy.
 

“That’s enough, Austin,” she warned. Under any other circumstances, she would’ve been shocked by her son’s rude behavior. Generally, he was a good kid, easy going for the most part. Since he’d busted them going at it, she decided to cut him a little slack.
 

“I’ll handle this,” Jed told her, his voice biting and cold.

Her back stiffened at his harsh tone. Her first instinct was to step in and protect her son, and she would, without question. But she also understood that maybe Jed needed to be the one to deal with the situation. They were all in the middle of unfamiliar territory. The lines were blurred and a new order needed to be established. While she wasn’t fond of giving up an ounce of control, she had a feeling Austin was in for a rude awakening. Having Jed around wasn’t going to be filled with the hero worship he had once envisioned.

“You,” Jed said, looking back at Austin, “need to apologize to your mom.”

“Screw you,” Austin shouted. “And her. She’s gonna ruin everything.”
 

Jed’s frown deepened, his exasperation clear. “How is she going to ruin anything?”
 

“She’ll get rid of you like she did my other dad. And then I’ll never see you again.” He threw another antagonistic glare her way that reached clear to the bottom of her soul and scraped it raw.
 

Austin had never blamed her for Ross’s leaving, and the fact he did so now, hurt. She tried to understand his confusion. What else could he possibly think when the only father he’d ever known had walked away without so much as a backward glance?
 

“Austin, that isn’t true,” she told him.

His face flushed with anger and his eyes were bright with unshed tears. “You’re a liar. You made him leave. And when he disappoints you, you’ll make Jed go away, too.”

Jed pulled out a chair, and sat, facing Austin. “Whatever happens between your mother and me is our business. But I promise you, nothing will ever affect our relationship.”

“You don’t know that.” Austin’s voice caught, and he sucked in a deep, wavering breath. “You could end up hating her as much as my other dad does.”
 

The raw torment in her son’s eyes broke her heart. She despised Ross for the hurt he’d caused Austin. Easing his pain over Ross’s rejection she could manage. His fears of rejection by his biological father were up to Jed to erase.
 

“Ross and I never hated each other,” she told Austin. Maybe because they had never really loved each other, not in that all consuming, passionate sense. Oh sure, they cared for each other, and in their own way, they did love. They were a partnership, or so she’d once believed. But looking back now, she saw their relationship for what it really was...empty.

“I heard him, Mom. I heard what he said to you.”

She frowned. What could he possibly have heard? She and Ross hadn’t even argued. Not like her and Jed disagreed. In fact, Ross had never fought with her, he shut down then made her feel foolish and emotional.
 

“I heard him.” The tears shining in her son’s eyes spilled over. “The night you told him to leave, I heard him say he hated being with us.” His voice caught on a sob, and her heart broke all over again.

“Oh, Austin.” She went to him and pulled him out of the chair and into her arms. “He didn’t mean it.” She looked over his shoulder to Jed. His jaw clenched and a muscle ticked in his cheek. Anger, no doubt directed at Ross for hurting Austin.
 

Get in line
.

Austin’s outburst wasn’t about busting her and Jed making out in the kitchen, or even the possibility of Jed abandoning Austin. No, this had Ross’s rejection written all over it. How on earth did she explain mid-life crisis to a child?
 

“He didn’t hate us,” she said, smoothing his hair.
 

Austin let go of her. He scrubbed his hand down his face, same as she’d seen Jed do several times. “That’s what he said, Mom. I heard him.”

“He didn’t leave because of you or even me. Not like you think. He despised what his life had become. He wanted to be free, Austin. He didn’t want to face his responsibilities. That’s on him. It had nothing to do with you.”

“Yeah, it kinda does,” Austin said, but shrugged his shoulders. “But, whatever.”
 

“Regardless of what happens with your mom and me, that has nothing to do with us,” Jed reiterated. “You got that?”

She half expected Austin to shrug again, but after a moment, he simply nodded in agreement.
 

Austin looked at Jed, caution and hope warring in his dark brown eyes. “Promise?” he finally asked.

“Yeah,” Jed said. “I promise.”

Griffen prayed Jed would keep his word. Because if he reneged when whatever was going on between them ended, her own relationship with her son could be damaged forever.

Twelve

THREE DAYS LATER Griffen had finished packing up the last of her private collection of collectibles she’d planned to auction off on Saturday. She had hoped keeping busy would have given her something to think about other than Jed, but she’d been wrong. Instead she’d been obsessing over him, fantasizing about him. Hell, she’d even dreamed about the man last night.
 

She had it for him...bad.

Tuesday afternoon he’d sent her a text message, telling her he’d be in Dallas for a few days but would be back before Friday to help her move the boat, jet skis and dirt bikes to the parking lot behind the store for the auction. Logic told her that when a car drove by her house that it wouldn’t be Jed, but that didn’t stop her from feeling a stab of disappointment every time it wasn’t him.

She sidestepped a box of collectible books she refused to sell. At least her job situation had improved. Carol Reynolds from the Hart branch of the Texas Federal Credit Union had called her that morning, letting her know they were looking for a loan manager. Apparently, Keith Shelton had mentioned she was in the market for a job and Carol had thought of her when their current loan manager had announced his retirement.
 

Not everything was sunshine and roses. She still had to pass all the background checks and make it through the interviews with the board of directors. Plus, the current loan manager wouldn’t be retiring for another two months. If the auction pulled in enough money, she wouldn’t have to worry too much. Things would be tight financially for a while, but they’d grown used to cutting corners the past few months.
 

She hefted a box filled with crystal stemware into her arms and made her way back into the warm sunshine to the rear of the Jeep. Having the extra time between jobs just might be a blessing in disguise since she’d have an opportunity to settle them into their new home.

Life, she’d learned, wasn’t about what happened to a person, but how they handled the obstacles thrown in the way. In the past few months, she’d become adept at looking for silver linings.

She set the last box on the back seat of the Jeep, turning when she heard the sound of Jed’s Escalade pulling into the driveway. Since she was eons past the point of playing it cool, she smiled like a fool when he slid from the SUV. Her pulse picked up speed as he walked toward her. The man was gorgeous. Just looking at him made her girl parts twitch. He wore a pair of jeans that fit his long, muscular legs perfectly. She hadn’t wanted to like him, but he’d proven time and again he wasn’t the shameless scoundrel the press had painted him.