Play Your Heart Out: A Rock Star Romance (Sinful Serenade Book 4) (31 page)

The nurse shakes her head. They speak for a few moments then the nurse calls me over.

"Are you Jessica James?" she asks.

I nod.

Immediately, she starts explaining Dad's condition. He's no longer at risk of alcohol poisoning, but his liver is damaged. Any future drinking is risky, even a glass of wine at dinner.

When she's done with the medical technicalities, she hands me a stack of brochures. "There are excellent treatment programs in the area."

Madison picks the polish off her red nails. "What if he won't go?"

"Then he can drink himself to death alone."

She bites her nail. "Jessie... I can't."

"You can." I nod a thank you to the nurse and walk my sister back to her car. I take her keys, take over driving duty. "It's going to hurt, but you can do it. We can both do it. I hope we don't have to but we can."

***

A
t home, I make coffee and breakfast. Dinner. Whatever this meal counts as. Hash browns, oranges, scrambled eggs with vegetables.

"I missed you so much I stole your
Hunger Games
poster." She stirs sugar into her coffee and sips it. Her face scrunches in distaste. "Don't know how you drink this stuff."

"You want tea?"

"I'm okay." She pushes her short blond hair behind her ears. "Plus, when it came out you were dating Pete Steele... seemed weird having his picture hanging in my room."

"It's a little weird."

"It made me feel bad. Knowing I hurt you." She attempts another sip of her coffee. "You tensed up when I said his name."

Figures. "We... broke up. Or maybe it's a fight. I don't know. We were barely together. Hard for it to be a break up."

"You want to talk about it?" she asks.

I do, actually. I want it off my shoulders. I nod. "On the couch. With proper background noise."

She laughs. "Let me guess.
The Hunger Games
. No,
Divergent
."

"Please. There's only Katniss. An imitation won't do."

She sticks her tongue out. I laugh. Then, we're both in stitches. The bar for comedy gold is lower when you've been in three time zones in two days.

"I've got it," she says. "Please. Let me."

For once, I let my sister lead. I take a spot on the couch. She gets me another cup of coffee, fixed the way I like it, a glass of water, a blanket.

She plops next to me. Once the movie is streaming, she turns to me. "You look heartbroken. What happened?"

I tell her everything. Even the part about it being pretend.

Then she tells me everything about her ugly breakup with Nathan. Turns out, he's still a controlling asshole underneath his charming exterior.

We talk about Mom and Dad—good times and bad—until Madison falls asleep on the couch. Only a few more hours until the hospital opens. I finish the marathon on my own.

By the end, I'm half asleep and I'm not watching the movie. I replay every ugly moment of the not exactly a breakup. When I can't take it anymore, I go to my room, unpack, put on my pajamas.

The doorbell rings.

This used to happen all the time. Dad would get drunk and make a scene. The neighbors would stop by, sometimes to check on us, sometimes to chew him out. Back then, I always lied. Always covered for him.

Not anymore.

No matter who that is, I'm going to be totally honest.

There are footsteps downstairs. Madison must be up.

"Hello," she says to the door.

I move to the hallway, poised to jump in if necessary.

She shrieks. "Really?"

I can't hear the person on the other side.

Madison pulls the door open and motions for the person to come in.

It's not a neighbor.

It's Pete.

––––––––

P
ete is at my door.

He's here.

He's taking what he wants.

God help me, he's wearing his glasses. He looks as yummy as ever in a black t-shirt and dark jeans.

My knees knock together. I try to speak but words don't come out.

He looks at Madison. "You must be Madison."

She nods. "Y-y-you're Pete Steele."

"Yeah." His eyes narrow. "You fucked Jess's boyfriend after he pulled that shit about asking her to choose between him and law school."

"Y-y-yes."

"What the fuck, Madison? Why did you hurt her like that?"

"I wasn't thinking. We... we already talked. I apologized." She motions to me at the top of the stairs. "She said she forgives me."

Pete looks up at me. "Do you?"

My mouth refuses to make words. I nod.

His lips curl into a smile. I melt. It's still the greatest sight in the world, that smile.

His expression gets intense and protective as he turns back to Madison. "You know how some guys write songs about how their ex-girlfriends deserve to burn in hell?"

"Y-y-yes."

"I'm giving you slack for hurting Jess cause I did the same thing. Hurt her again and there's gonna be a new Sinful Serenade song called
Madison is a Bitch
. And that's only gonna be the start of how much I make your life miserable."

"I... I didn't mean to. I'm sorry." She bites her lip. "I didn't do it on purpose. And you need to talk to her. She loves you. She was crying. This time, you're the one who hurt her. She told me everything. It sounds like you've had your head up your ass, but Jess loves you too much to see it that way."

He chuckles. "You have a backbone, huh?"

"Yeah." She clears her throat. "You've been an idiot. Make it up to her or I'm going to be the one making your life miserable."

He smiles. "Fair deal."

"Good." She folds her arms over her chest.

He nods an okay to Madison then all his attention is on me. "Were you crying over me?"

"Hard to pin point an exact source." I play with my pajama bottoms. "You were top two."

He smiles.

"You threatened my sister."

"Too much?"

"No. You... you're fighting for me."

He nods. "This is nothing."

"What's something?"

"You're gonna say it's cheesy."

"That's okay."

He moves all the way up the stairs. Until he's one step below me. It puts us almost eye to eye. I'm still a few inches above him.

He stares into my eyes. "I love you, real or not real?"

Pete pulls his t-shirt down and points to his chest. His skin is red from a new tattoo.

It's an arrow with the word
real
in the middle of it.

It's the
Hunger Games
couple's tattoo I told him I wanted. Half of it.

My fingers go to his chest. Then I'm staring into his eyes. "Can I?"

"Yeah."

I trace the lines of the ink. "When did you do this?"

"Soon as your plane left." He presses his hand to his heart. "Well, soon as the tattoo parlor opened."

I trace it again and again. "Why?"

"Same reason I got my other ink."

"You felt something in your soul?"

"Yeah." He takes another step. "And more than that. I stayed at the airport. Watched your plane take off. The second it was gone, I felt it. This emptiness in my chest that had been filled before. Kept thinking about you hurting by yourself. It tore me in half."

"I tore you in half?"

He ascends the last stair. His arms slide around my waist. "Don't feel the emptiness anymore. Not when I'm holding you. I only feel right. That's love." His eyes meet mine. He brushes his hand through my hair. "I love you."

It's a good thing he's holding me as tightly as he is, because I'm reasonably certain I've lost all feeling in my legs.

His fingers find the back of my neck. "Jess, I'm in love with you."

"You're wearing your glasses."

He nods.

"For me?"

"Don't play fair when I want something."

"Good." I rise to my tip toes and press my lips to his.

I can feel it too. How much he loves me. How much I love him. We kiss long, slow, and deep.

I look back into his eyes. "Say it again."

"I love you, Jess."

"I love you too."

"I told you not to run from your feelings, but I was a fucking hypocrite. I was running from this, from how much I cared about you. Still didn't quite believe I had more to offer than my money or my fame. Or my body."

I run my fingers over the tattoo again. "It's a very nice body."

He smiles.

"It's mine now. You marked it for me."

"Yeah. And for Katniss."

"This is so much better than my name." I stare back into his eyes. "Can we stop talking now?"

"Fuck yes." His hands go to my ass. "Which room is yours?"

I point to my door.

In one smooth motion, he lifts me into his arms. I wrap my legs around his waist, holding on tight.

Pete kicks my door open. He lays me on the bed. It's small but that only means we're pressed closer together.

There's no patience in his kiss. Or in mine. I'm greedy about exploring his mouth with my tongue. About pulling his shirt over his head and pressing my palm against his chest.

He shimmies out of his jeans and boxers then does away with my tank top and shorts. I'm naked. I'm pretty sure my door is halfway open but I don't give a flying fuck.

His hand slides between my legs. "You're already wet, baby."

I nod. "No teasing today. I need you inside me."

"Need to be inside you."

He shifts our positions so he's flat on his back and I'm on top of him.

No teasing, no patience. I press my hands against his chest and position my body on top of his.

Pete's hands go to my hips. His eyes are locked on mine, filled not just with lust but with love too.

No teasing, he pulls my body over his, pushing his cock deep inside me.

My body cries out with relief. Pete is mine. I'm his.

It's perfect.

I ride him until I'm panting and dripping with sweat. Every inch of my body is on fire with pleasure. Is it possible to feel an orgasm in your soul? This one is hitting somewhere deep.

"You ready to come, baby?" He brings his hand to my inner thigh.

"If I can come with you."

"Fuck yeah." He rubs my clit with his thumb. His other hand goes between my shoulder blades, pulling our bodies closer.

My God, those fingers. He loves me and he has magic fingers. And he's mine.

I cry out his name as I come. He's there a few moments later. His lips lock on mine, all the love and affection in the universe pouring back and forth between us.

He stays inside me as he pulls us onto our sides.

I nestle my back against his chest, soaking in the sound of his breath and his heartbeat.

"I still have to deal with everything with my dad," I whisper.

"I'll hold your hand the whole time."

"Really?"

He murmurs a yes into my ear.

"Say it again."

"You ready to come, baby?" His fingers trail over my hip. "I can arrange that."

"No. Well, after you say you love me."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

He slides his hand between my legs and makes good on his promise.

***

O
nce again, Pete takes charge. He's incredible at getting shit done. He sends me to shower, makes coffee, calls Aunt Zoe and arranges a meeting time.

He even makes breakfast. Sort of. There are bowls of cereal and milk on the table.

It's good he knows his limitations.

He drives us to the hospital in his luxury rental car. It's visiting hours, but we need to wait for Aunt Zoe. We all need to be on the same page. Dad gets one more chance, that's it.

Nervous energy races through my body. I soak in all the comfort Pete can give me. It's a lot of comfort. He rubs my back, holds me, whispers in my ear that it's gonna be okay.

Finally, Aunt Zoe arrives. She looks less polished than she usually does. Her short brown bob is messy. Her cardigan is wrinkled.

"How are my favorite girls—" She hugs Madison then me. "Given the circumstances?"

"Okay, given the circumstances." I motion to Pete. "This is my boyfriend, Pete."

He looks at me and raises a brow. "I'm your boyfriend?"

"You aren't?

"No. I am. Just glad you knew."

Aunt Zoe looks at us with confusion.
The kids today
. She introduces herself then sits between me and Madison.

"There's really no question." I pull the brochures from my purse. "We have to tell Dad he has two choices—he can get treatment or he can deal with this alone. But it only works if all three of us are willing to pull the plug."

Pete rubs my back. It's easier getting through this with him here, knowing I have back up. I'm not light but I'm not heavy either.

"I can do it." I can't bring myself to look at my aunt or my sister as I make the claim. There's no way they're going to believe me. I clear my throat and look into Aunt Zoe's hazel eyes. "I don't want Dad to die alone, but I'm not watching him drink himself to death. Period."

Zoe purses her lips. She looks to Madison then to me. She nods. "I agree."

Madison nods. "Me too. But what do we do?"

"Let me lead." I push myself to my feet. Okay. I can do this.

Pete squeezes my hand as we walk to the hospital room. The hallway is a strange mix of beige and blue. The yellow fluorescent lights do little to make the place look more attractive.

The door is open, so I knock on the frame. "Dad?"

"Jessie." His is equal parts weak and ashamed. He knows he's been caught. "What are you doing here?"

I step inside the room. His grey hair is matted to his forehead. His blue eyes, usually full of life, are tired. And he's pale. Really pale.

He looks like he's going to break. My instincts beg me to throw away this plan and do whatever it takes to make him smile. But I'm not that person anymore.

I have to do this. Even if it means I lose Dad.

"Daddy, I'm sorry," I say. "But I don't have time for small talk. You're drinking again."

He says nothing but the guilt registers all over his face.

Madison squeaks. She bites her nails, one by one. Aunt Zoe wears a pretty strong poker face but there's frustration in her eyes. She's scared too. He's her brother. Of course she's scared.