Plain Wisdom (27 page)

Whenever I visit Miriam, we begin our mornings in her “hiddy”—a secluded spot to rest, pray, and visit with sisters and close friends. Her vegetable garden is mere feet away, and behind it is a huge pasture for the horses. We sit in lawn chairs tucked behind a set of L-shaped lilac bushes, sip fresh-perked coffee, and talk quietly while the earth wakens to a new day.

When time allows, we return to that spot at the end of our day and watch darkness fall, listening to the songs of birds bidding the world good night. Tree frogs, cicadas, and crickets sing boldly. And we occasionally hear my favorite nocturnal bird, chuck-will’s-widow.

During some of those quiet, still times, Miriam and I began to talk about our desire to share our lives with our readers—not a list of how-to tips, ten steps to better living, or learning to gain control over yourself, your husband, your children, or your life. We simply wanted to tell our experiences—the tough, fun, encouraging, disappointing, and embarrassing
moments—so they might instill a sense of hope, victory, and humor into our readers’ days.

With each visit Miriam and I realized a little more how much we wanted to write a book together. We longed to share what we know about connecting with God and shaping our limited talents into successful living—in ourselves, our marriages, our children, and every other relationship. Basically, we wanted to invite our readers into the hiddy with us and tell them what God has told us:
You can do this. You won’t get it perfectly right. Only I can do that. You won’t fully complete the task at hand. But I can complete it for you
.

We wanted to be transparent but not so much that anyone in our lives, precious or difficult, felt embarrassed or angered by what we’d shared. So we’ve written honestly and openly, yet cautiously.

Whatever challenges face you, wherever you are in your journey of life, His strength can continually strengthen you. Philippians 4:13 says, “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” His love can fill you to overflowing. First Thessalonians 3:12 says, “The Lord make you to increase and abound in love one toward another, and toward all men, even as we do toward you.”

Perhaps you don’t feel worthy of receiving anything for yourself. Shortly after I accepted Christ, I felt so guilty I couldn’t even enjoy praying. I kept rehashing every wrong deed I’d ever done. One day, while wallowing in a melancholy state of guilt, I heard these words in my heart:
What did I die for if not for sins?

I’d heard that concept many times. But in that moment I saw the ridiculousness of lugging my guilt around. Christ was crucified for the very purpose of forgiving us and freeing us from sin and guilt. That revelation brought me great relief.

You are worthy to receive His hope and make a success out of your life for Him. Don’t believe God’s best is only for your children, friends, spouse, sister, brother, mom, or dad.

Believe it for yourself.

Cindy sat next to me in my craft room as we worked on finding the right format for our book,
Plain Wisdom
. I was still a bit skeptical about our project, feeling insecure about my abilities in this new line of work. At that point I wasn’t even certain it was truly God’s will.

For our first chapter we wrote “Finding Peace.” We each had completed our respective pieces, but we needed a scripture to complete our entry. Cindy searched the Bible on her laptop while I paged through my tattered Bible.

The room was quiet except for the soft
click, click
of Cindy’s computer and the occasional rustle of my Bible pages. After searching for some time, we each came up with a verse we thought might work. After reading each other’s choice, we looked up and smiled. Out of all sixty-six books of the Bible, 1,189 chapters, and more than thirty-one thousand verses, we had both chosen the exact same scripture: Ecclesiastes 3:1. “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.” I considered that an encouraging nudge from God, telling me He was behind our writing this book. And that must have been true, because you have that book in your hands now. But accomplishing the goal was tougher than I’d planned on.

Cindy and I knew we’d have challenges—carving out time amid our busy family lives, working together despite the distance between us, my writing each entry in longhand and mailing them individually to Cindy for her to type up and merge into one master document—but had we known what we’d each face within our families while trying to write, we probably wouldn’t have embarked on our journey. Cindy’s dad has been ill for several years now, but his health took a harsh turn for the worse. She needed to prepare her home to receive her special-needs brother. My youngest son, Mark, was seriously injured in an accident, and I had to tend to him round the clock for nearly two months. None of those setbacks really tells the exhausting emotional toll of those events. But I think
about that encouragement from God time and again, and I know something now that I don’t believe I knew then: encouragement from God isn’t about assuring us the journey will be easy but that the work accomplished will be fruitful.

It’s time for us to say good-bye. Our hearts are overjoyed that you trusted us with some of your time, and we hope something we’ve shared has benefited you.

As you read our stories, you saw the many differences and similarities between us and our daily lives. In many ways our lifestyles are so different it’s hard to understand how we navigated around those things to form a wonderful friendship. When we first began to get to know each other, I (Miriam) had spent so little time among the English that on some occasions I couldn’t think of an English word to describe what I wanted to tell Cindy. We know only a few of the same church songs. We don’t have movies, travel, or schooling in common.

So what drew us together?

We believe it’s the same thing that draws all of us together, regardless of our culture or background—a sense of respect and love. Believers have a kindred spirit that comes from having the same God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit.

We hope you’ve felt that spirit of sisterhood with us as you’ve read
this book. And we pray that you’ll find someone special to share your life moments with as we’ve shared ours with you.

Proverbs 17:17 says, “A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”

Family members can be some of our closest friends. Strangers can become our closest friends. In John 15:15 our own Savior calls Himself our friend. When His lovingkindness surrounds us, it often comes through the vessel of family and friends.

If you’re anything like I (Cindy) was throughout most of my adult life, you may not be good at making friends, but I encourage you to ask God to open doors and then put the necessary effort into walking through them. Endure awkward or embarrassing moments when necessary. You’ll discover all sorts of interesting things about others and yourself. You’ll grow in ways that will strengthen and change you. And you’ll open up your heart to new facets of the human experience.

As we pointed out in the entry “Amish Friendship Bread,” the best way to have a friend is to be one, and the best way to strengthen a friendship is to do kindnesses when they’re not expected.

When your friends aren’t perfect, be grateful—because if they were, you’d be the only one in that relationship who wasn’t.

When we choose to love one another deeply in spite of our differences, we reap the benefits—because love covers a multitude of sins and faults—theirs and ours (see 1 Peter 4:8).

Behatz Sei Hoffning (Embrace His Hope),
Cindy and Miriam

1. Have you ever had a friend whose background and experiences were vastly different from yours? How did those differences affect your relationship? In what ways did they make the friendship more difficult? In what ways did they make it more special? What commonalities did you discover in spite of the differences?
   
2. Did you sense the Holy Spirit speaking to you through one or more of the stories in this book? What message did you glean, and how do you think it will affect you?
   
3. What was your favorite thing about this book? Learning more about novelist Cindy Woodsmall and her real life? Getting to know Cindy’s friend Miriam? Gaining a better understanding of the Amish? Which did you enjoy most: the heartwarming stories, the humor, the recipes, or something else?
   
4. When Miriam and Cindy met the first time, a humorous incident helped break the ice. Have you experienced an awkward situation that was made more comfortable by a touch of humor? What happened, and what was the result?
   
5. When Cindy had an extended visit with Miriam, it helped her see life from a different perspective. An unexpected event—a bad storm, an electrical outage, a health issue, or a financial crisis—can have the same effect, altering our daily routines and forcing us to do everyday things a little differently. Such changes to our regular schedules can help us see the important things in life that often get buried under the deluge of our daily responsibilities. Have you ever had such an experience? How did it affect your outlook and priorities?
   
6. Cindy and Miriam both told stories of families who were blessed by strangers. Have you ever been the recipient of such a blessing? Have you ever had the opportunity to be generous to a stranger? Giving and receiving are both part of God’s plan for His children. How can you be a better giver and a more gracious recipient?
   
7. Miriam wrote, “The right word spoken at the right moment can turn a negative situation into a positive one.” Have you ever been in a bad situation that was turned around by a “right word”?
   
8. Cindy and Miriam wrote about favorite memories around the family table. What are some of your cherished mealtime memories? How often does your family gather at the table to eat? If you’d like to have more mealtime memories with your family, how can you increase their frequency?
   
9. Miriam told about a time when the Lord answered a “seemingly insignificant” request in a special way. Do you sometimes hesitate to “bother” the Lord by praying about the little things? Have you ever prayed for something that seemed trivial, only to be surprised by the Lord’s loving response and abundant provision?
   
10. Cindy and Miriam shared stories about their parents. They also wrote about their experiences as mothers. What special memories do you have of your mother and father? What are you doing now to instill special memories in your children?
    
11. Miriam and Cindy talked about the friendship they’ve developed with each other as well as other friendships they’ve had. What special friends have you made over the years? What makes those relationships so wonderful? How has God been a friend to you when you’ve been (or felt) friendless?
    
12. Miriam wrote, “The best way to strengthen a friendship is to do a kindness when it’s not expected.” What unexpected kindness can you show to a friend this week?
    
13. Cindy wrote, “When we pray, we often express a deep desire. If we stop expecting a specific response, we may find the answer.” Think
    of a time when you prayed for something specific but God’s response wasn’t the answer you expected. How might your prayers change if you stopped looking for the responses you want and started looking for God’s answers?
    
14. In this book did you read about any customs or traditions (Amish or Englischer) that you would like to incorporate into your own family life?
    

From Miriam

First I would like to thank Cindy Woodsmall for giving me this opportunity, for opening the doors and leading me through them. Your encouragement always inspires me.

Shannon Marchese, Kathy Ide, and Carol Bartley, our editors. Your instructions are invaluable. I am awed by your wisdom and knowledge. Thanks for your patience.

Steve Laube, our agent. Sincere thanks to you for the effort you poured into this project.

Barbara Putrich, your behind-the-scenes work did not go unnoticed and is much appreciated. Bless you.

A special thanks to Daniel, my husband, for your love and support.

To my sons who lived at home during this writing venture—Mervin, Michael, and Mark. You picked up the slack on the home front and were so very patient.