Paradise Island: Complete Edition (2 page)

I thought about those piercing green eyes. That face. That body. The way he filled out that shirt and those jeans. I wanted to, but I couldn’t lie to Lucy. She deserved better than that from her friend.

“Yeah, I think he’s attractive. But I don’t need any complications in my life right now.”

“You’re twenty-two, sister, if it doesn’t get complicated now, it never will. You have to start living life sometime.”

I thought about what she’d said, but I still wasn’t ready. I don’t know if I’d ever be ready to let someone get that close. Not after what happened before I came to this place.

I sipped my tea, as Lucy continued to gulp her wine. It seemed our conversation had come to a halt.

“I’ll rent some of his movie and we can catch you up on what you’re missing,” she finally said.

I nodded in agreement, too tired to fight her. Maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea. While I wasn’t planning on dating the guy, it didn’t hurt to learn more about him.

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T
he next day the whole routine started again, except this time I had butterflies in my stomach. Was Jack Stark going to come to the diner again and try to talk to me? I’d hoped not, but things in life never turn out the way we’d hoped they did, do they?

He showed up close to the end of my shift again, and when I pointed him out to Lucy, she was more than willing to serve his table. I observed from a distance as he smiled at her and enjoyed his coffee and eggs and English muffins. I caught myself several times just admiring the man for no discernible reason, the rest of the world disappearing around us. Once I’d realized what was happening, I brought myself back to reality. It wasn’t going to happen, and even if anything did happen, I was just a waitress in a diner in the middle of nowhere. Apparently he was a world famous movie star hiding out from the world. But if I did give him a chance, what would happen once he was ready to rejoin the outside world? Would I be relegated to just another one of his flings he could barely remember after having the next one?

No, I wasn’t going to be that girl. And even if he did want something more, something more permanent, I wasn’t ready to get that close to anyone now, or pretty much ever.

I ignored him for the rest of the shift and put him out of my mind. Jack Stark might have been a celebrity of sorts, but I wasn’t the kind of girl who was impressed by that, for better or for worse.

I said goodbye to Lucy as my shift ended, she promised to catch me up on all things Jack Stark once she got home, and I once again braved the piercing cold wind outside.

Not surprisingly, a familiar face greeted me not too far from the diner.

I wasn’t in the mood for another useless conversation so I just passed him by.

“Wait,” he called after me as he caught up. “I just wanted to apologize.”

I looked him straight in the face, and then I met those mesmerizing eyes and I had to look away again.

“Don’t sweat it. Just leave me alone and we’ll be fine.”

That was that. I was ready to go home and forget the whole thing.

“I just saw something in you...like you understood what it’s really like. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

His words got to me. Reached into the core of my being. Maybe he and I did have something between us. Something the rest of the world wasn’t weary to. I looked upon him again and saw sadness in those eyes. Maybe he was more like me than I realized.

But then I remembered he was an actor. And if he was a good one, he could pretty much fake anything to get inside a girl’s pants.

“Good try. Is that a line from one of your movies or something?” I retorted back, sounding almost disgusted with the whole affair.   The look on his face was one of surprise and hurt, and if you asked me, it seemed genuine. I immediately felt like the world’s greatest bitch for just saying what I did.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean...” I stated but he cut me off.

“Forget it. I thought you were different. I guess I was wrong.”

And with that, he went ahead of me, to only God knows where.

I wanted to run after him. To apologize for my senseless cruelty, but I stopped myself.

I went home instead and wallowed in my own misery. I kept replaying everything that happened between us, trying to somehow change the outcome. Yes, I wanted him to leave me alone. But I didn’t want him to be angry with me. I didn’t want to hurt him. If that pain I saw in his eyes was real, what I had just done was unforgivable, and I didn’t know if I could live with that.

I wanted to be left alone in this world so that people would never hurt me again. But it seemed that now I had hurt somebody else myself, and it was eating me up inside.

Lucy arrived as usual, but I didn’t notice until she had closed the door behind her. That was how far gone I was.

“What happened?” She asked, concern in her voice and on her face. Her shoulder length red hair a bit of a mess, but she still looked quite beautiful.

I tried to get the words out but all I got out were some tears.

Stupid, stupid, I told myself. Who cries over something as silly as that? Jack Stark, famous movie star, had probably forgotten I even existed by now, and here I was bawling my eyes out because of an offhanded comment that wasn’t even meant to hurt him.

“Please tell me what happened, and I’ll tell you how to make it better,” Lucy said, offering me a glass of wine.

While I usually refused her offers of alcohol, this one I accepted. It was going to be a long night, and I might as well numb the pain with something.

I
woke up groggy and with a headache like one I’ve never experienced before. I vaguely remembered telling Lucy everything and her laughing at me, after telling me what a bitch I was, of course. Sure, she quickly said that she was kidding, but it really didn’t make me feel any better. Then we proceeded to watch a marathon of Jack Stark movies: romantic comedies and action flicks being the prime example of his best work. I’ve gotta admit that I could see the appeal: he was pretty damn hot! And if it was possible, he was only hotter in the flesh.

So, it was quite the night. Thankfully, today was my day off so I didn’t have to worry about trudging to work.

I got up and took a long shower in an effort to wake myself. It was another cold and dreary day outside, but at least it was dry. I decided to go for a walk, since it always helped me feel a bit better when I got too far to thinking existentially.

I took my thickest coat and my best rain boots. I thought about bringing an umbrella, but I really wasn’t in the mood to be carrying anything around. All I wanted to do was walk by the sea, breathing in the fresh sea air. It usually helped me forget myself, and I hoped it would do the same for me today.

My jacket had a hoodie in case of a sudden rainfall (which wasn’t unheard of in this town) and I was ready to go.

As I slowly walked down to the seashore I thought about what Lucy had told me. How I needed to start living my life and stop being so afraid of everything. Intellectually I understood her point, but when it came to actually implementing her advice, I felt a huge block in my way. I wasn’t ready for that kind of change, and I didn’t know if I ever would be.

I walked by the seashore, watching the waves coming in and out, and let myself go with the flow of the sea, the tide of the wind.

That’s why it was a shock when I practically fell face first as I tripped over something right in my path. Scratch that, I tripped over someone.

“Oh shit, I’m so sorry!” I cried as I slowly got up.

“It’s alri...oh, it’s you!” Jack Stark said, a not-too-happy look on his face.

I shook off the sand from my jeans and jacket. “I said I was sorry!” I said in my defense.

“Yeah, yeah,” he said, shaking sand off of his jeans as well. I couldn’t help but admire the view. I quickly averted my eyes when I saw him look up at me.

“You know what I said yesterday, I didn’t really mean it,” I finally said after the awkward silence had become too much. I knew I should have left him be, but I just couldn’t just leave things as they were. I didn’t want him to hate me.

“That’s fine,” he said noncommittally, not really looking at me.

In an effort to look anywhere else but the man in front of me, I took notice of my surroundings and saw a huge house up ahead. It was the house everyone was jealous of in the town. I knew I heard Lucy talk about it more than once.

“Do you live up there?” I found the words coming out of my mouth before I could think about what I was saying.

“Yeah,” he said. “Want a tour?”

“No, I was just wondering. It looks like a beautiful house.”

“It should be, especially how much I paid for it.”

“Well, I should be on my way.”

“If that’s what you want.”

“I saw a couple of your movies yesterday,” I said. “I did have a bit too much to drink, though, so I can’t promise I remember everything exactly.”

“Some critics say that that’s the only way they can sit through my movies: while drunk.”

I laughed. “Oh my God, you did not just say that!”

He smiled at me and winked.

I was glad that he was no longer angry with me.

“Are you sure you don’t want a tour? I’d understand if you’ve gotta get to work.” He seemed almost disappointed by the prospect of my having to leave.

“No, I’m off today. But I should really go.”

Just when I was about to turn, it was as if fate, or some other force, had decided it was a perfect moment to laugh at me. Clouds became darker and sudden downpour went down, drenching us both.

And just as an insult to injury a loud roar of thunder sounded in the night sky.

“Maybe that tour wouldn’t be such a bad idea!” I said as I shivered from the cold rain. My jacket wasn’t of much help.

“Follow me,” Jack said and took my hand and led me up the hill to his house. His beautiful house on the hill.

And the closer we got, the more beautiful the house became. While the rest of the town was made of cottages and small crappy houses, this house was very much modern. The walls were made of glass, allowing for a beautiful view of the surroundings.

He closed the sliding doors behind us and I immediately felt better. It was warm inside, and it was a relief to feel heat on my skin after the icy cold of the outside.

Jack took off his leather jacket to reveal the soaked through white shirt. The outline of his perfectly muscled chest made me blush. I had to look away. I shouldn’t have thoughts like this.

And then he was right in front of me. His body as close to mine as I always feared another man’s would be. I could smell his cologne, or maybe it was his natural scent, I wasn’t really sure. I wasn’t really experienced in such things, as well as many others girls my age would have seen as normal.

His hands were on my shoulders and I froze. I did not know what to expect.

“Let me take your jacket,” he said gently, and I immediately backed away.

“Is anything wrong?” He asked, a questioning, and sad, look in his eyes.

“No, sorry, it’s not you. It’s just I don’t like...well, I can get my own coat off, is all I’m trying to say.”

I couldn’t believe that I was almost going to spill my guts to this guy. Maybe those romantic comedies of his had gotten to me. Maybe I was confusing fantasy with reality, and that was not a place I wanted to be. Not again. Not ever again.

I slowly took off my jacket. Thankfully the shirt below was mostly dry, so I wasn’t going to flash him my boobs like he had flashed me his perfectly muscled chest.

I warmed myself up with my hands.

“I’ve gotta get a dry shirt,” he said as he took off his wet t-shirt in one motion. “I’ll be right back.”

Once again I found myself blushing at the sight of his naked torso. His firm, muscled back. I had the sudden urge to throw myself in his arms. To play with his hard nipples, like one of the women in his movies, to show him how attracted I was to him.

But of course I just stood by the sliding door, not really sure why I was there in the first place.

Then I let my eyes wander to the view all around me and realized why I was there: the storm outside was raging. I saw lightning in the distance. I closed my eyes and put my hands over my ears as I readied myself for the huge, deafening sound of thunder.

And it came. Worse than I imagined. The force of it resounding itself through my body, making me ill to my core.

Once it was over I opened my eyes and saw a familiar face in front of me. He had put on a fresh shirt and another pair of jeans.

“You scared of thunder?” He asked me.

“Yeah, ever since I was a kid. I know it’s silly, but...”

“No, no, it’s not silly. We’ve had a couple of guys get hit by lightning at some of my shoots.”

“That makes me feel much better.”

He smiled that devilish smile. “Most of them lived, though.”

I smiled back. “That’s not funny.”

He turned toward what looked like the living space, and I admired the view from the back. I felt like a pervy guy looking at a girl. But it was natural, Lucy had said to me many times. Men weren’t the only ones who had sexual feelings. Women had them as well. And what was the harm in looking, anyway? It wasn’t like anything was ever going to happen between us.

“I’ll light a fire,” he said as he walked toward the modern looking fireplace.

“Need some help?” I offered, more out of habit than anything.

He turned around and had a huge grin on his face, showcasing that perfect movie star smile of his. He flipped a switch I hadn’t noticed before and where before there was only wood, now there was fire. Where there was darkness before, there was now light.

“I think I can manage it,” he said.

“Right,” I said, not moving from my spot.

“Are you going to join me? It’s gonna get pretty chilly with the storm outside and all.”

“Yeah,” I said. “I guess I will.” I wanted to go home and crawl in bed, and maybe even put pillows over my head to drown out the sound, but that wasn’t going to happen now. Everyone stayed indoors in weather like this. Since it was such a small place, barely anybody owned a car. That was fine by me, because I never learned to drive anyway. I liked the fact that I could walk anywhere I wanted to. But that also meant that I was at the mercy of the elements. I knew it was getting ready to rain, but I still decided to take a walk anyway. It was my fault that I found myself in this situation.