Only With You (11 page)

But she was so used to getting her way, she couldn’t stand that I’d blown her off
. So what did she do? She showed up out of the freaking blue, and now I not only had to deal with the fact that she was perfect and I couldn’t have her, but she was also mad at me. She was unbelievable.

“
What
do you want?” I asked, turning back to Jake.

“
Dude, she thinks we’re together. Like,
together
. You know what I mean?”

“Yes!
I know what you mean.”

I had no idea what made Sydney ask that,
so I didn’t have an explanation, and Jake hadn’t shut up long enough for me to ask her when she’d been standing right next to us.

“Why does she think that? You don’t have some sort of crush on me, do you? I mean,
I know I’m hot and all, and if you’re gay, that’s totally cool, but you and me, it’s never gonna to happen, man.”

I rolled my eyes. “I don’t have a crush on you, Jake. How long have you known me?”

“Two years.”

“And in those two years, how many women have you seen me with?”

“A lot, I guess. Not as many as me, but you don’t do that bad.”

I shook my head. It was so not the time for a pissing contest.

“Yes, you pull more pussy than I do,” I told him angrily. “You win the fucking prize, but that is so not the point. Have you ever seen me with a dude?”

“No,” he said, shrugging.

“Then that should answer your question!”

He jerked his thumb toward
our room. “Then why does she think you’re gay? She’s your best friend. She should know.”

“I’m not having this conversation with you,” I growled at him.
“I need to go talk to Sydney and figure out what she’s doing here.”

“Getting jealous is what it looked like.”

I stared at him for a few seconds like he was nuts. “Yeah, I don’t think that’s it,” I said, my annoyance overtaking my tone. “She has a boyfriend. She’s pissed that I blew her off tonight. She’s just being a diva.”

Okay, that was mean, but I wasn’t exactly feeling
benevolent in that moment. Before he could respond, I turned and started walking toward our room.

“Hey, what about me?” I heard from behind me and turned to see Olivia standing there with a pout on her lips.

“Come on, Liv,” Jake said, taking her arm. “I want to show you something cool.”

I might have been annoyed with him in that moment, but he was kind of bailing me out, so I couldn’t be that pissed off. In his own way, he was being a good friend – even if it meant he was going to take Olivia down to the den so he could hook up with her. I didn’t care. I wasn’t interested in her anymore.

“But I was hanging out with Ryder,” she protested.

“He’s busy.”

“Was that his girlfriend?” she questioned.

Jake laughed. “Yeah right.”

I shot him a middle finger over my shoulder. He just laughed again.

W
hen I got back to my room, I closed and locked the door behind me, figuring Jake would be tied up for a while occupying Olivia, but I didn’t want to chance any of the other guys barging in. I wasn’t sure why Syd was there, but she’d risked a lot coming to a college campus alone in the middle of the night. I didn’t see any of her security guys with her. Maybe they were outside.

“How did you get here?” I asked, turning around to face her.

She’d pulled the beanie off of her head, letting her long brown hair fall down her back as she leaned back against the carpeted loft. She moved so her elbows were resting on the platform and the hem of her hoodie moved up to expose just an inch of her tanned stomach that I wanted to plant my lips on for several days. That inch of skin was the freaking devil. It was driving me mad, and I couldn’t look away from it. It was seriously giving me a semi. This girl had her hooks in me so far, and she didn’t even know it. I was gone. G-O-N-E. Gone. And I kind of hated her for it.

“
In a car,” she said sarcastically.

“
You drove?”

I didn’t think she drove anywhere anymore.

She nodded. “Yes. I used Dillon’s rental car since I gave him my hotel room for the night.”

I raised an eyebrow at her. “
You borrowed your boyfriend’s car so you could come yell at me for blowing you off?” I asked in disbelief.

“Yes, I did,” she said indignantly. “Except
, he’s not really my boyfriend.”

Say what?

“Then who the hell is he?” I demanded.

“
He’s my fake boyfriend,” she said, and my head started to spin.

Seriously?

“Fake? But last night you acted like he was real and coming to visit you, so you could sing some duet with him,” I said derisively, not believing what I was hearing.

“He has a girlfriend back home,” she muttered. “His label doesn’t like her, so they set us up. It’s all for show. He’s just a good friend. So good, in fact, that tonight I flew his girlfriend down so they could spend some time together
and gave them my hotel suite.”

“That was nice of you.”

She shrugged. “I guess.”

I narrowed my eyes then, realizing I’d gotten upset
and left the night before over nothing, but then again, she’d led me to believe he was her boyfriend. And that pissed me off. “Why didn’t you tell me that last night? That he wasn’t really your boyfriend?”

She was supposed to be my best fucking f
riend, and as far as I knew, we’d never kept secrets from each other in the past. What made her start now? I didn’t believe for a second that it was the distance. She’d had an ulterior motive. Maybe she had been trying to push me away, but if that was the case, what was she doing here now?

She sighed. “The only people
on my team who knows the truth are Chris and Laurie. There were three people standing nearby last night when Dillon called me, so I couldn’t exactly tell you the truth. Then you left a minute later.”

Oh. Right.
I had done that, but only because of what she’d said. Now I felt like an asshole.

“
So who is Jake exactly?” she asked me then, changing the subject.

“He’s m
y roommate,” I muttered, not sure why she was asking about him. There was no way she was interested in him. “I’ve told you about him before.”

She
nodded. “He’s not the womanizing jerk who sleeps with multiple women in a week, is he?”

“Yeah, that’s Jake, and I get the great honor of sh
aring a very thin wall with him,” I said, patting the wood that separated our caves. “It’s charming, really.”

“I don’t understand,” she said, shaking her head.
“You were hooking up with that girl.”

She
looked pissed all of a sudden, and her mouth had twisted into a distasteful sneer. What was she pissed about now? Was she actually mad that I’d been making out with Olivia? That was so not cool. She had absolutely no right.

There was no way she could
expect me to spend my life pining away for her when she didn’t want me. I’d taken a shot. She’d had her chance, and she’d chosen to reject me. And when she’d pushed me away, every hope that I had about her being the girl for me, came crashing down like a house of cards – that were actually made of bricks now that I think about it – and they’d crushed my poor heart to pulp when they fell. She’d fucking ruined me. I’d been a mess for months because of her.

Yeah, I was being dramatic.
I was drunk. Sue me. But fuck if she was going to be mad at me for moving on. I didn’t need that shit.

“Who was
she?” Sydney demanded when I didn’t answer her.

I shrugged. “She’s j
ust a girl.”

“She’s not your girlfriend?”

I shook my head. “Nope,” I said crisply. “I don’t have a girlfriend.”

I‘d never had a girlfriend
, because I was an idiot who spend half his life wanting a girl he couldn’t have and the other half comparing every girl he met to her. I hadn’t even hung out with any other girls until Sydney moved away. Then when I’d kissed a girl for the first time, I’d looked at her and thought, she’s not who I want. She’s not Sydney. So I’d never stayed with anyone long enough for them to become my girlfriend.

#stupidunrequited
feelings

#Ryderisanidiot

#whendidistartspeakinginhastags?

Damn, I was really fucking drunk. And I just wanted to lie down. Without another word, I hoped up onto the platform and
unceremoniously flopped back onto the couch.

Sydney narrowed her eyes at me
as she turned around. “So do you make out with random girls often?” she snapped, resting her forearms on the platform.

Was that really jealousy in her tone?

“I guess,” I said, aiming for aloof. Let her think I was a giant player. Was there actually a chance that she might want me then? Was that seriously a possibility? “The randoms pass the time, since I haven’t met anyone yet who I can see myself actually dating.”

Outside of you, but you do
n’t want me. Are you changing your mind? Are you? Please say yes.

“Who
are
you?” she asked then, so obviously not impressed by me.

And the house of bricks came crashing down once again.
I was like one giant, epic, fucking fail no matter what I tried with her. But like they say, when you’re down, you can’t get any lower.

“Ryder Thompson, International Stud,” I said, shrugging and completely using one of Jake’s lame ass lines. I didn’t care anymore. I was so done. Let her think I was an ass. I could give a shit.

Then she laughed, and I wanted to groan at how sweet and tantalizing the sound was. I fucking loved it. I was so not done.

“Whatever,” I told her. “You can date
Asshole Actor, Boy Band Douche and Aussie Rock Star Guy, but I can’t hook up with a few sorority chicks? Please.”

“
What the hell is that? Do you have nicknames for every guy I’ve ever been with or something?” she demanded.

Yeah, come to think of it, I did.

I shrugged. “Maybe. They’re all idiots, so I’d rather not remember their real names. They all treat you like shit, and you let them.”

Okay, that was mean.
But it was kind of true.

“I’m not
actually dating Dillon!” she insisted, not refuting my statement. She knew I was right. “I
just
told you that. And he’s a really nice guy. I also told you last night that Paul was gay. Truthfully, I thought you’d really like him. He thought you were hot when he saw you at the show two nights ago.”

Okay, that was odd.
A gay guy thought I was hot. Should I be flattered or weirded out? I wasn’t sure.

“Uh, tell him thanks, I guess.”

She sighed exasperatedly. “I actually thought about hooking you up with him if you were single, but that went out the window. You’re not gay.”

No
, I’m not. Never have been, in fact.

“Why in the hell would you think
about hooking me up with a guy?” I asked her.

Apparently it was because she actually thought I was gay – like, for real. I realized then
that I’d never asked her why she’d made that comment about thinking Jake was my boyfriend. Did she seriously think that?

She threw her hands up in the air. “Because I
obviously
thought you were gay!” she shouted.

Well, yeah, I got that.

“I’m
obviously
not!” I shouted back.

“I know that!
” she screamed, and I just shook my head.

What the hell was going on?

I took a deep breath, trying to calm down. I didn’t need to keep yelling at her.

“Did you
seriously think I was gay?” I asked her in disbelief, since I could not wrap my head around that concept.

“
Yes,” she said softly, all traces of anger gone from her voice.

Shit. Seriously?

“I’m really not.”

“
Well, I know that now!”

What the fuck?
No, seriously. What. The. Fuck?!

“
How could you honestly think I was
gay
?!” I questioned, my voice rising about three octaves, which I was well-aware didn’t make me sound any less gay than she apparently thought I was. “I’m not. Trust me. I’ve never even kissed another guy before. I’m definitely not gay. Why would you think I was gay? Seriously? I mean, come on?”

I was babbling in a really high-pitched tone.
Why wouldn’t my voice drop? I sounded like a little girl!

“But you’ve never dated any girls
,” she reasoned, and I felt like laughing. It was that comical.