One of the Guys (13 page)

Going into my room, I lay down and
thought about everything that had happened between us over the
years.

The times he’d come to watch me at
gymnastics, the times I’d watch his practices and games. Also, the
times when we would hang out together, just the two of us. We
wouldn’t go far, usually to each other’s houses, and we never went
out to the diner together. If were getting food, it was always
delivery, or takeout. I often wondered why that was.

I snorted a laugh as I pictured it
was because he didn’t want anyone to think that we were dating.
That seemed like the most obvious reason. I should’ve just asked
him at the time. Instead, I just let it go; like everything
else.

If he ignored me whilst we were
with the others, he’d be extra nice. If he said something that
pissed me off, he’d be extra nice. If he were later than he said
he’d be, he’d be extra nice. They all involved him getting a little
closer; a little touch, more smiles.

I threw my pillow across my room in
frustration. Why couldn’t I figure out what was going on in his
head? He’s a guy! Aren’t they supposed to be simple to
decode?

I got up and went into my closet
and took out the box that was full of memento’s from the time we
became friends.

I opened the box and pulled out a
gum wrapper, the first ice-cream tub he ate from, birthday and
Christmas cards, and also my ticket stub from the bike race we went
to a few weeks ago. I also pulled out my secret photo stash. I’d
printed out the selfies we’d taken over the years and the ones I’d
taken when Logan wasn’t looking. I sat staring at his beautiful
face and his smile, and I thought about what he would think if he
saw my keepsakes.

Would he have kept anything
himself?

Instead of feeling sorry for
myself, I got changed into my stretchy workout gear and practiced
some flexibility moves in the middle of my room. It was a way to
get rid of the tension. However, it was building up faster than I
could get rid of it lately.

*****

The next morning,
Logan picked me up for school and I could tell he was wary of me
when I met him at the door.

“
How are you feeling?” He asked,
unable to keep eye contact with me.

“
Better.” I said, with a smile, and
I was.

Through the night, I’d decided that
I couldn’t let my feelings come to the surface too much. If
anything, I would have to try to bury them.

Good luck with that!

The guys met us at school, and the
conversation turned to the tests we’d done, before the game. The
pressure of the game, on top of finals, caused the guys to get a
little stressed.

“
You’re lucky you don’t play.” Lex
said, surprising the hell out of me.

“
Why?” I asked,
confused.

“
Because it’s
stressful; especially now. We had finals last week and all of the
studying
and
practice to do was a lot.” He said.

“
Yeah. We don’t get much time to do
anything else.” Pike added.

“
I don’t even want to see another
math problem.” Said Stu, his head in his hands.

“
I may not play baseball, but I do
other things besides study, you know.” I said.

I heard Carl snort a laugh, which
Logan answered with a glare.

“
Your days are so cushy. Studying
and school. Oh, and that old lady you shop for.” Added
Lex.

“
Actually, I still
train.”

“
Train what?” Asked Stu.

“
Gymnastics?” I said, more like a
question. They knew I went, but they’d never seen me
‘perform’.

“
I didn’t know you still did
that.”

“
I never stopped.” I
said.

We never talked about it, I guess,
so they had no reason to think I did.

“
Show us something.” Said Lex, with
a smile and I saw his eyes glance over my body again.

“
No.”

“
Why not?”

“
Because it’s
not the time,
or
the place.” I said, as if it were a ridiculous
thing to suggest. Yeah, like I was about to do a row of back
handsprings down the hallway. I’d take a lot of students
out
by doing
that.

“
Another time, then.” He said,
still smiling at me.

I glanced to Logan, and I saw that
he wasn’t happy with Lex, at all.

“
We should get going.” He said, and
he put his hand around my shoulders, steering me down the hallway.
Not as he’d done the last time, but around me
nonetheless.

If I didn’t know any better, I’d
say he was being territorial over me. The way Lex had spoken, and
looked at me, Logan hadn’t liked it. Maybe there was something else
in Lex’s actions that I’d missed that Logan had picked up
on.

No. You’re not going to think like
that. Just savor the moment that Logan is touching you. Don’t
think; just feel.

That I did. I felt his warm hand on
my shoulder, lightly gripping as we walked down the hallway to my
homeroom.

“
I’ll see you in class.” He said,
steering me through the door, out of the reach of Lex.

Before I walked even a couple of
paces, I heard the rumble of Logan’s voice saying something and
Lex’s laughter, followed by the others. I let it go and sat at my
table, waiting for the bell to sound for the first
period.

Walking into Chem class, I saw
Logan in his seat, next to Carl. Carl was saying something to him,
and Logan looked pissed. Like
really
pissed.

“
Hey.” I said, sitting down in my
usual spot on the other side of Logan.

“
Hey.” He said, his expression
changing immediately.

He smiled at me and there was no
trace of the scowl he’d been shooting at Carl.

“
Is everything ok?” I asked,
glancing to Carl who was looking down at his desk.

“
Yeah. Everything’s fine.” He said
as he shifted in his seat. “Lex was just kidding, you
know.”

I was taken aback by Logan’s
comment. I hadn’t thought about Lex at all, and he must’ve thought
I had.

“
Oh, Um… ok.” I said, a bit unsure
of what else to say. “I never even gave that a thought.”

Logan’s eyes snapped to mine, and
his cheeks turned pink, ever so slightly.

“
Oh, I thought you would’ve been
angry with him.”

“
No. He was kidding, and I don’t
have to prove myself to him anyway.”

“
No, you don’t.”

I saw the faintest frown on his
face before he turned away when the teacher walked into the
room.

Logan sure was acting strange this
morning.

During Chem class, I was well
aware of Logan’s constant fidgeting in his seat. Carl was chuckling
under his breath, and I really wanted to throw my book at his head.
Something was going on with Logan, and Carl was finding it funny. I
wasn’t. I wanted to know
exactly
what Carl’s problem was.

“
Carl, shut up. Instead of cackling
like a witch, try paying attention. Maybe you’ll get a decent score
this time.”

I was fully aware that he hadn’t
gotten anything higher than a ‘B-minus’ for chemistry all through
the year. I’d never mentioned anything, until now. Now, he was
getting on my nerves by laughing at Logan.

“
Yeah? You don’t
do much better,
and
you need Logan to help you.” He said, snarling at
me.

“
Is that so?” I asked with a
smile.

Yes, Logan helped me with
chemistry, but I wasn’t as bad as Carl thought. To be perfectly
honest, I was just as good as Logan. I just wanted him to think he
was helping me so I could pay close attention to him without him
realizing what I was doing.

“
Yeah.
We
all
know Logan helps you.”

“
Carl!” Logan whisper shouted; a
threat in his tone.

“
God
knows
you help him with his Math. Why
else
do you think he keeps you
around?” Carl smiled slyly at me.

“
Carl, that’s enough!” Logan said,
getting angrier. “That’s bullshit and you know it.” He turned to
me, panic in his eyes. “Chase, don’t believe him, he’s being an ass
as usual.” He said, clenching his fists on the table.

I knew Logan wouldn’t do that to
me. After all, we’d been friends for almost three years.

As I thought about it, I realized
that the majority of our time alone was spent studying. The subject
was mainly math, too. Had Logan been using me all this
time?

“
Chase.” I heard him call from next
to me.

“
What?” I asked, looking into his
eyes. Eyes that seemed to be afraid that I believed Carl over him,
or possibly worried that I’d been told the truth?

“
Don’t listen to him, he’s talking
crap. I wouldn’t do that; you’re my friend.”

I shouldn’t listen to Carl. After
all, he’s always trying to make me feel like I don’t belong, but
something about this stung. I couldn’t help thinking that Logan’s
panicked expression might have been because Carl’s comment held
some truth to it.

I didn’t say anything else. I just
nodded and got on with my work. Logan wasn’t happy, and Carl looked
like a smug little bastard. If Logan didn’t punch him, then I had a
feeling I’d be stepping up to take a swing.

Chapter
7

I managed to get
through the rest of the day, without another comment from Carl, and
I’m pretty sure that Logan had said something to him. I felt a
little awkward getting into Logan’s car after school. He’d been
passing sly glances to Carl during lunch, and Carl looked as if he
were enjoying it.

I was so confused.

Lex had been looking over to me a
few times and I wondered what was going on with him. Normally, he
wouldn’t look twice but now he was freaking me out. I had to check
myself to see whether I had something on my clothes or my face. I
didn’t understand what his deal was. He’d pushed his brown hair out
of his eyes, and let his eyes look me up and down. It made me
uncomfortable.

“
Did you say anything to Carl?” I
asked when Logan pulled out of the parking lot.

Logan took a deep breath, and his
hands gripped the steering wheel.

“
Yeah. I told him to quit being an
asshole to you.”

“
Oh. What did he say?”

I hate to admit that I was a little
disappointed that was all he’d said. If it were the other way
round, I would’ve grabbed Carl and smacked him in the
mouth.

“
He said he was just fucking
around, and also getting you back for what you said to him.” He
replied.

“
What? He was
laughing at
you
! The fucking dumb-ass should quit making fun of people and
just concentrate on his schoolwork. If he did, maybe he wouldn’t be
such a fuck-up.” I spat.

Carl wasn’t a complete fuck-up. He
got mostly B’s and the occasional C, but he was still far from an
ideal student.

“
Why was he laughing at you? What’s
going on?” I asked.

“
Nothing.” Logan
shrugged.

“
Don’t lie to me
Logan. You looked uncomfortable, and Carl was laughing about
something that
he
obviously knows about. What is it?”

Logan sighed and ran a hand through
his hair in irritation. He could make out as though he didn’t want
to tell me, but I wasn’t going to budge this time. I continued to
stare at him, which I was glad to do, letting him know that I was
waiting for an answer.

“
It’s nothing, Chase. Just leave
it.” He said, finally.

“
Leave it? What
do you
mean
, leave it? Would you let me leave it if it were the other
way around?” I knew the answer to that immediately. “Oh yeah, you
did. When you thought I was mad, you let it go for two weeks before
you asked me what was up.” I said, reminding him of the
fact.

“
That was
different, Chase. I thought you were mad at
me
for something. Not
mad at somebody else.”

“
I don’t see how that’s different.
If you’re mad, you’re mad. It doesn’t matter at whom or why. You
just are. As a ‘friend’ you would want to know
regardless.”

Logan glanced to me when I
emphasized ‘friend’. I saw his jaw clench and then loosen. He
licked his lips before he spoke again.

“
I’m not mad
with anyone, or I wasn’t until what Carl said to you. I’m um… just
worried about Friday’s game. It’s the last one of the school year,
and I want it to go well. With Carl’s attitude lately, I’ll be
swinging the bat at
him
instead of the ball.”