One Hundred Names for Love: A Memoir (38 page)

Or maybe taking a “Mystery Trip”—a longtime household favorite—in which one person has a destination in mind, but the other tries to figure it out based on clues in the landscape. I took Paul on an aerial Mystery Trip for his birthday one year when I was teaching in Athens, Ohio, by renting a plane and flying us north about an hour to a small field hosting an Aercoupe convention (WWII airplanes Paul had a fetish for). After Paul’s stroke, although he couldn’t read well, he learned relentlessly by watching countless science (especially astronomy and animal behavior) programs on PBS, Discovery Science, and National Geographic channels. And, by year five, helping me do the easiest New York Times crossword puzzles most evenings after dinner.

“What’s a four-letter word for a pitcher?” I sang out, stumped by a clue in the first puzzle we tried.

Counting four spaces in his mind, he had to hold those in memory, picture a pitcher, remember the image, search through his lexicon for possible words, choose a word, then attach sounds to it.

He scrunched up his forehead in thought until at last, twinkling with pride, he declared: “Ewer!”

“Ewer? What’s a ewer?” Not a word I’d encountered.

“A pitcher. Roman.”

He was right. Since then, with great excitement he’s come up with the likes of
ethos, agora, trireme, jape
, and
olios
, and we’ve enjoyed playing with crosswords during our end-of-the-day kickback and relax time.

Living More in the Present.
After the loss of someone I had years of relating to in a certain way, familiar as the air I breathed, I sometimes had to remind myself that life is a place where good things happen as well as bad. At times it’s been hard to accept that life has changed irrevocably, and will never be the way it used to be.

Mind you, life will never be what it feels like at this moment either, because it’s a whirligig flux all day long, as trillions of sensations bombard the brain, millions of ideas and feelings haunt the corridors of the mind. Less like a single tapestry, and more like spindrift spray blown by impetuous winds along the surface of the sea. All of those dramas adhere to the self, a quixotic animal that never stops revising and reimagining who it is, while changing second by second, as new sensations winkle in, new events challenge, new thoughts and feelings well up. Our lives together, our duet, also continues to evolve, and even if we can’t go back to
how it was
, we’re designing a good life for us, in spite of everything.

THE ONE HUNDRED NAMES

Celandine Hunter

Swallow Haven

Spy Elf of the Morning Hallelujahs

Bow-Ribbon of the August Sky

My Little Spice Owl

The Epistle of Paul to the Rumanian Songthrushers

Summer Veil of Highest Honor

Dream Hobbit

Apostle of Radiant Postage Stamps

Ivory-billed Woodpecker of the First Rainwater

My Snowy Tanganyika

Little Moonskipper of the Tumbleweed Factory

Blithe Sickness of Araby

Divine Hunter of the Cobalt Blue Arena

Pong of the Pavilion Where Sweet Peas Go to Spoon

Parapluie of the Snowy Ecstasy

Golden Little Dreamer

Pavlova of the Morning Dew Line

Avatar of Bright April

My Little Bucket of Hair

Fierce Angel of the Marmalade Valley

Rheostat of Sentimental Dreaming

Southern Carmine Bee-Eater

Belle Dame of the Morning Pavilion

Romantic Little Dew-Sipper

Commendatore de la Pavane Mistletoe

Sugarplum of the August Faery

Edelweiss of the Blizzard Pink

Highest Massage of the Succulent Endearing Poach

Swan Boat of the Imperial Sun

Baby Angel with the Human Antecede Within

Fleet-footed Empress of Sleep

Buoyant Hunter of the Esteemed and Cosmological

Tsunami

Hummingbird of the Tricyclic Montevideo

Goddess of Abstract Conversation

Terpsichore Deladier

Delicious Pie of the Alternate Sheepfold

My Little Celestial Porcupine

Diligent Weather Sprite

Diligent Apostle of Classic Stanzas

Mistress of Wonderment

Sylvan Grove of the Endless Flare

Stanza Trance

Patient Priestess of Ever-afters

Lovely Ampersand of the Morning

My Billiard Table of the Decaying Gods

Anti-Gravity Drive of the Century

Autobiography of an Almond

Opalescent Rejoicing of an Eel

Salute to the Kitchen of Creation

My Hooray for the Atheist’s Asylum

Super-driver of History Beyond Herodotus

Buoyant Eft

Carmine Postulant of the Pleasant Voice

She for Whom All Flowers Bloom Early

Goddess of Godspell, Saint of African Violets

O Rose of Sharon, I’m All Rosy

Book-Lover of Life’s Infinite Volume

Satrap of the Endless Sky

Chasuble of the Evening-painted Cloak

Plethoric with Broken Limbs

Condor of the Light-footed Ridge

Soft Little Hummingbird Who Waits for Me

My Lawn Raider, Everlastingly Pure

Little Scarab of Delight

Lithe Swan, Why Do You Linger So Long?

Valley of the Uprooted Silver-tongued Nightingale

My Showy Sedum, My Sycamore Tree

O Singing Squirrel of the Antipodes

Elk of Bright Morning

Tumultuous Wren, Say When, When, When!

Dark-eyed Junco, My Little Bunko

Black-capped Chickadee Who Puts on Robes for Me

Skylark of the Perfect Trance

O Little Titmouse, Here in My House

Jocund Sprite of the Dew

Historic Shaman Sent to Propitiate

Moon Swivel

Flotation Ninja

My Poetic Little Starfish

Umbrella of Light

Celestial Elf

Delicate Frisson Enclosed in a Warm Bunnycuddle

Uxorious Bountiful

Inertia Canceled

Sweet Opalescent Centrifuge

My Remains of the Day, My Residue of Night

Star Equerry

Blessed Little Smile

Queen of Purple Emotions, Starlike in Their Crescendo

Telephone Fensterhorn

Betelgeuse of Bright Inquiry

My Hopi Planet

Foundling of the Here and Beyond

Pleiades of Starship Mine

Bobby-dazzler of the Golden Morn

My Moon Calf of Perpetual Ceremony

Little Flavanoid Wonder

O Parakeet of the Lissome Star

FURTHER READING

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—.
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