One-Click Buy: November Harlequin Presents (13 page)

His gaze didn't waver. ‘I'm here because we need to discuss the future of a baby.'

He had always known how to reach in and grab her heart. She would always put her baby first, and he knew that. ‘Then, we'll talk here, in London.'

‘No…' He shook his head, frowning as he straightened up. ‘Something's come up. I have to get back to Niroli straight away—'

Carrie paled. ‘Your mother—'

‘My mother's fine. It's something else that won't wait.'

She would have heard if the king's health had deteriorated, Carrie thought, determined to hold her ground. ‘My home is here in London, Nico.'

‘If I could stay longer, I would. But I'm needed in Niroli.'

As he leaned across the table to stress the urgency of his commitment Carrie's thoughts flew immediately to Princess Anastasia. And she had done with playing second fiddle to Nico's prospective bride. She refocused as he started speaking again.

‘My younger brother, Max, is struggling to control a vine crisis on the island and he badly needs my help…'

She felt guilty for thinking the worst of him, but after Nico's tactics in Niroli she had to be sure this wasn't another ploy.

‘I'll do anything I can to help,' he continued, ‘and I need to get back to him right away. I'm sorry, Carrie, but that's how it's got to be. I need your decision now. I can't wait.'

She guessed Nico had spent longer than he had intended looking for her. But this was typical of Nico; he was all business, all practicality. He was going to Niroli to help out his brother, but he would multi-task along the way, tying up the loose ends in his personal life. The baby was just another loose end and so was she. She had to wonder how he could be so matter-of-fact about a child that occupied her every waking thought. Maybe Nico couldn't imagine the moment he held his child in his arms for the first time; neither could she, but her heart was ready.

‘You could have a full health check in Niroli,' he went on, instinctively homing into her weak spot again. ‘Not to mention your first scan…' He looked at her expectantly.

‘I've already got one booked, Nico. I'm going for it tomorrow—'

‘I'd like to come with you….'

She stirred her coffee round and round, anything rather than look at him.

‘Well?' he prompted. ‘What do you think?'

Without raising her head, she told him the truth. ‘I think that's a low blow, Nico. I think you play dirty.'

‘When I have to,' he agreed.

She looked up at him then. ‘And what will Princess Anastasia think of this arrangement?'

‘What's it got to do with her?'

‘Quite a lot, I'd say, if you're going to be married.'

‘Married?'

As Nico grimaced she looked away. She didn't want to fuel the little bubble of hope inside her. It was always looking for an excuse to grow.

‘Forget her, Carrie. Put Anastasia out of your mind. That's never going to happen.'

She was so relieved she almost threw her arms around his neck, but luckily she didn't and focused on her concern for his brother. ‘I understand that you've got to return to Niroli. Family must always come first. When this crisis at the vineyards is over, perhaps, we can talk then. Or do you intend to stay on in Niroli?' It was easier than asking him straight out if he was going to be King.

‘My head office is in London,' he said without emotion.

‘So, you'll be coming back here?'

‘How about you, Carrie?' He asked rather than answered a question. ‘Will you come back to work for me when the baby's older?'

‘I don't know, Nico,' Carrie said honestly. She wouldn't rule anything out until she felt confident she could support her child. ‘With the baby and now my painting, I don't know if I'll find it easy to work in an office again.'

‘We'll miss you….'

Nico knew just how to pull her heartstrings. He had transformed everything she felt about him in the time it took to drink a cup of coffee. She pushed the cup away, reminding herself that Nico had blackmailed her and that was why she had run away from him. But he was making her want things like belonging somewhere, like being back in a familiar neighbourhood with friends around her, like having him around….

She tried hard not to stare at him when staring at him was all she wanted to do.

‘You'll come back with me to Niroli and we'll talk?'

Nico's voice was so persuasive. And now she couldn't look away.

She should have remembered that he could never sit for long. When he stood she almost did, too, but then she remembered the fiasco at the banqueting hall and stopped herself just in time. ‘You mean, you'll talk and I'll listen, Nico? That's not how it works; not anymore…'

‘Then you'd better tell me how it does work.' Reaching into his jacket pocket, he brought out a pen. Writing something on the back of the menu, he handed it to her. ‘Here's my number. Call me when you're ready….'

He didn't wait to see her reaction.

As Carrie watched Nico ease his way through the closely packed tables she longed to chase after him. It was hard to believe he had gone to all this trouble to find her only to walk away. He didn't turn around once. Shouldering his way through the café door, he crossed the pavement and then jogged through the passing traffic to flag down a cab.

N
ICO
,
the consummate negotiator, Carrie thought as she paced up and down her small living room. He had given her no time to think, because he was only interested in a straight yes or no. Hadn't he said he could arrange a scan for her tomorrow in Niroli? He had probably flown to London in his private jet and might even have left the country by now….

But she had his mobile number on the back of the menu…She got through to him right away.

‘I'll take a cab,' he said briskly, ‘and pick you up on the way to the airport.'

‘Thank you.' She barely managed that much before the line went dead.

Her appointment for a scan at the main hospital in Niroli was for late afternoon the following day. Having settled back into familiar surroundings at the palace, Carrie expected Nico might join her at some point during the day, but she saw him only twice, and then only through the window. The first time was barely minutes after they had arrived when he swept out in a hurry to see his brother, Max, and the second time was after lunch, when he appeared to be dressed for riding, judging by his breeches and casual shirt.

She felt a pang of jealousy as she watched him stride across the courtyard and then caught sight of herself in a mirror and laughed. Was she jealous of a horse now?

Carrie had thought that coming back to Niroli meant they would spend more time together, but Nico's schedule was squeezed into ever smaller boxes, and she hadn't found one with her name on it yet.

The next time she saw him was just before they had to leave for the hospital. She had been ready for ages and was waiting by the door. When the knock came she counted slowly to twenty before opening the door.

‘Sorry this has to be quick,' Nico said, shouldering past her into the room.

‘Don't worry, I'm ready….'

‘No—' he shook his head, all rush and impatience ‘—I mean, there's hardly any time to give you this.' Digging into the pocket of his shirt, he brought out a box.

‘What is it?'

‘I realise this is hardly a romantic moment…' Grimacing, he shrugged and then glanced skywards as if divine intervention might be his only hope. ‘It's a ring, Carrie….'

‘A ring?' Her fingers tightened around the small black velvet box.

‘An engagement ring,' Nico said as if that were obvious. ‘Aren't you going to open it? Here—' he was as impatient as ever ‘—let me do it.' Peeling her fingers back, he removed the jewellery box from her hand, flipped it open and pulled out the biggest diamond Carrie had ever seen.

‘Was this the biggest one in the shop?'

‘Pretty much.' Nico's lips pressed down with concentration as he tried to force it on her finger.

‘I meant was that your criteria for choosing it?' Carrie didn't even glance at the egg-sized bauble that wouldn't make it past her first knuckle. She could just imagine the jeweller taking one look at a hunk like Nico, and, knowing he was the grandson of a king, picturing him with some supermodel with pin-thin fingers.

‘I'm no good with jewellery…no practice…'

She should be grateful for that, Carrie supposed as Nico shot her his best winning smile. ‘Nico, take it back,' she said, wrenching it from her finger. ‘I don't want it.'

‘You don't want it?' He sounded incredulous.

‘You haven't listened to a word I've said to you, have you? I don't want to marry you and I don't want your money or what it buys. I don't want your status, either. I don't need it. I don't need any man to support me, or to present me with meaningless gifts.' Taking the box from him, Carrie carefully secured the ring in its slot. ‘I'm sure you'll get your money back.'

‘Don't worry about that—it's only on approval.'

‘Well, that's great. I'm really pleased for you.'

At least he had the good grace to colour up.

‘Carrie…I'm sorry, that was clumsy of me.'

‘Yes, it was.' And this time, sorry wasn't enough. ‘You managed to fit a little shopping into your lunch break, and you expect me to be grateful, is that it?' Her look was half sad, half wry. ‘Marriage is a sacred pledge, Nico, and I don't want my baby growing up only to discover that the reason its parents married was because it was expedient at the time.'

‘I thought we should firm things up—'

‘Like signing a contract?'

‘Exactly,' he said as if she'd seen the light.

Can't we at least pretend? Carrie bit down on the thought. Nico wanted to lay claim to her child, just in case, she knew that, but she didn't want to be a convenient womb for a man who didn't love her. She wanted to be loved for herself and she wanted to share the love inside her. A diamond, however big, meant less than nothing compared to that.

‘Don't you want your child to be born in wedlock?'

He hadn't given up. But only because giving up wasn't in Nico's nature. ‘I know plenty of single mothers who bring up children happily,' Carrie assured him, ‘and the type of arrangement you're proposing won't make anyone happy, Nico. Don't kid yourself.'

‘I just thought as a mother—'

She threw him a withering look. ‘I'm sorry you have no understanding of how much a mother loves her children, particularly when you have such a wonderful mother yourself, a mother who clearly adores you and who would do anything in her power to secure your happiness. A legal document, just because it happens to be called a marriage certificate, won't make the slightest difference to the love a mother has for her child.'

Nico glowered at her, but at least he managed to hold himself in check. Opening the door for her, he stood aside. ‘Come on, we'd better hurry, or we'll be late for your appointment at the hospital….'

Everything could change in a moment.

For both of them, Carrie realised. There had never been a more significant moment in her life than this, or anything close, and she knew without asking that Nico felt the same. She could feel his awe, his hope, excitement and his fear as they waited together, bound together more surely by this new life than they had ever been before.

The silent expectation of the technician, the flickering screen, the struggle to comprehend what they were seeing…The hard hospital couch and cold jelly beneath the searching probe, Nico breathing steadily at her side, and her own breath hitching in her throat as she finally made out the tiny shape the radiographer was trying to explain to her…And then the sob that found its way from her throat at the moment that Nico exclaimed in wonder…

Every microsecond of that would be branded on her mind for all time.

‘That's your baby,' the radiographer said.

‘Yes, I know…'As Nico spoke he didn't move at all, he was transfixed by the screen. ‘Can we have a print-off, please?'

‘Certainly…'

As the radiographer made the necessary adjustments to her equipment Carrie turned her head away. She couldn't bear to see the look on Nico's face. She couldn't bear to see that and then have him, some time later, disillusion her. But it was already too late, she had already seen that he shared her feelings, but he didn't want to share her life and, for a moment, she almost wished he hadn't come with her.

No…No, she didn't mean that. How could she deny him this? But if he still doubted her, if he still doubted the tiny life growing inside her was part of him, then she didn't know if she could ever forgive him.

‘Carrie…Carrie,' he said more insistently, ‘look at this…'

Carried away by wonder and excitement, he helped her to sit up and then held the small photograph out in front of her.

‘Can we keep it?' he said to the radiographer.

‘Of course you can.' She smiled at him indulgently, as if she had lived this moment countless times before and had never tired of it.

‘Don't cry, Carrie,' he said. ‘It's wonderful.'

She closed her mind against all the things that Nico couldn't see; all the things they could have shared together and never would. But when she opened her eyes again she saw with shock that Nico was crying, too…

He denied it, of course, when she pointed it out to him and then he stood up and made a performance of straightening the cuffs on his shirt. He looked too big for the room suddenly, too restless and awkward and eager to be gone and to be alone, to show his feelings to no one but himself.

‘I'll leave you to get dressed.' He was already halfway through the door when the radiographer called him back.

‘No, I'll go,' she said archly, ‘and give you two some time together.'

‘I…' Carrie's voice was lost in a flurry of activity and, before she knew it, the door had closed and she was alone with Nico.

‘Incredible,' he murmured, still studying the photograph.

‘Can I see?'

He tore his gaze away reluctantly. ‘Yes, of course…'

Sitting down again at her side, he held it in front of her, refusing to relinquish hold of the image, giving the impression he would never let the small, grainy picture leave his possession again, not even for a second. ‘Can you see this?' He angled the photograph. ‘Do you think those are boy legs, or girl legs?'

‘Does it matter? Do you care?' Carrie studied Nico's face. There was no chance she would distract him, not the slightest chance he would catch her staring at him….

‘No, of course I don't care. As long as the baby's healthy, I don't mind if it's a girl or a boy.'

She had to smile at his confidence. He was determined to play a leading role in the upbringing of her baby, but quite how that was going to happen…

Fear of what Nico might do to keep her baby under his roof drove her to hit back at him. ‘But you won't know it's yours for another six months yet.'

And now the spell was broken. There had been no need to say that, but there were so many fears inside her competing with the joy and the fears had won.

‘Don't you know yet?' he rebuked her softly.

‘I know…'

She had to stop this agonising over everything Nico said, or might do, now or some time in the future, or anxiety would eat her up. The fact that he had stated his intention to be an effective parent was enough; she couldn't ask more of him.

‘Do you mind if I keep this?' he said.

She wanted to tell him yes she did, but it seemed churlish when she had the baby.

‘I'll get you a copy,' he said, still examining it.

‘Will you?'

‘You know I will.'

As their eyes met she believed him.

‘I'll wait for you outside while you get dressed.'

The intimacy between them had disappeared, she realised as Nico left the room. The easy acceptance of their nakedness had vanished. They had shared this, the closest of moments, and yet something had died that would need rebuilding if they were ever to get it back again.

Nico said very little on the way back to the palace, and when they arrived he turned Carrie over to the care of his mother with little or no explanation other than the fact that he had to get back to his brother, Max, to finalise the plans they had been making. Anyone would be lucky to have Nico in their corner, Carrie reflected, standing back from the window so he wouldn't see her watching him as he left. He still had the photograph in his breast pocket, she realised. She wondered if he would get it out from time to time to take a look at it, or if he would be content just to keep it next to his heart.

She was dabbling her feet in the lake when he returned. She had just planted her hands on the cool grass behind her and was leaning back, closing her eyes. She didn't hear him at first and gave a little start when he hunkered down on the ground beside her. ‘Is everything all right?' She shaded her eyes to look at him and was immediately concerned.

‘Now it is,' he said, frustrating her desire to know more.

When he leaned across to brush a wing of hair from her face it was so unexpected that she flinched.

‘Don't you trust me, Carrie?'

She held her breath.

‘I'm sorry if I disturbed you.'

‘You didn't disturb me.' But he was smiling at her in that way he had that made her heart perform somersaults.

‘I was just admiring the view.'

‘With your eyes closed?'

She had to smile.

‘Let's do it together,' he suggested, leaning back and shutting his eyes.

‘Nico…'

He opened one eye to look at her.

‘You're impossible.'

‘At last, we agree on something.'

He leaned closer, he leaned very close until she was sure he was going to kiss her, but instead he sprang to his feet, leaving her aching for him.

Walking away from her, he stood at the edge of the lake with his arms folded across his chest. ‘So, how do you feel now, Carrie? Now you've seen the baby…'