Off the Record (17 page)

Chapter Twenty

The phone was ringing as Alex opened her front door later that evening, and she scrambled to drop her bag, grab the phone, and shut the door behind her. The ringing stopped before she made it. She sat at the bottom of the stairs, her head in her hands.
What a week! Will this never end?

She jumped when the phone rang again, sounding loud in the darkness. She grabbed for the receiver and dropped it. It took a few seconds for her to find it.

‘Hello?’ she gasped, her heart still pounding.

‘Sandy? I’ve been trying your cell phone, but you switched it off.’

Alex closed her eyes, feeling tears well. Just the sound of his voice left her yearning. ‘Yes, sorry, I was in a meeting, so I had to turn it off. I forgot to put it on again.’

‘Honey, are you OK?’

‘Yes. I dropped the phone. I just got in. I haven’t even turned the lights on yet. I couldn’t see a thing. I’m OK.’

‘You don’t sound OK.’

‘Well, let’s see. Last time I answered a ringing phone it was my bishop. I’ve just had the most awful meeting with him, and I’m sitting here in the dark trying to imagine why someone would be so … so … bloody horrible!’ Her voice rose as the emotions she’d been holding in check overwhelmed her. ‘Who could have done such a thing? How could they make it all so sordid?’ She was crying openly now.

‘Oh baby, don’t cry. I’m so sorry. Don’t, please.’

‘What have you got to be sorry about? It wasn’t you.’

‘I know, but it’s my fault. Whoever did this isn’t getting at you. They’re gunning for me.’

‘Well, I don’t see you being hauled before the bishop,’ she snapped. ‘All my parishioners know about it too – I’m amazed there aren’t a pack of press-hounds outside my door.’

He swore. ‘My guys are keeping the press busy. Don’t worry. I’ll talk to the Bishop. I’ll put it right. You don’t deserve this.’

‘No, I don’t. But neither do you. I’ll sort the bishop out myself, thank you.’

Johnson winced as he heard the unspoken ‘you’ve done enough’ at the end of the sentence. He could feel a gulf growing between them that had nothing to do with distance, and everything to do with that damned text message and whoever was behind it. ‘I’ll find out who did this. I won’t have you suffering for something that you didn’t do.’

‘But what does it matter if we did or not? Everyone around me is convinced we’re at it like rabbits.’

Johnson felt rage burn out of control. ‘It’s not like that! You’re special, dammit! I do want to make love to you, so much it hurts. But if you don’t know the difference between love and fucking, then maybe it is sordid after all.’

For an endless moment there was absolute silence. He felt his heart sink. Had he blown it?

‘Sandy? Talk to me, please.’

‘It’s not sordid,’ she whispered. ‘I probably shouldn’t admit it, but I feel the same about you. I know it’s too soon, but I can’t help it.’

He released a long breath, closing his eyes in relief. ‘Thank God.’

‘I wouldn’t thank him just yet,’ she cautioned, sniffing. ‘I have a feeling that we’re going to be tested.’

‘Don’t you know, I’d face anything if it meant I could be with you?’

‘Oh, Johnson. It’s sweet of you to say that, but … we’ve been apart for so many years. We were children then. Our lives are so different. Are you sure you’re not just feeling sorry for me?’

‘That’s bull. I know all that crap, but it doesn’t change how I feel about you. It sure as hell ain’t pity, lady. You’re special. You make me complete. And I
will
be with you. Soon. I need you, and I can’t stand the thought of you going through this alone.’

‘But …’

‘The only reason I’ll back off is if you convince me you didn’t mean it when you said you feel the same.’ Again, that damned silence. ‘Is that what you’re telling me?’

‘No,’ she said with a sigh. ‘I’m just out of my depth here. But don’t worry. I’ll be OK.’

He wanted to raise a fist in the air and yell, but he didn’t want to scare her. ‘Promise me you’ll be careful.’

‘It’s a bit late for that. The damage is already done. I just have to keep my head down until it blows over.’

He hoped so. But he had been targeted like this before. He knew the misery that someone intent on harming him could bring. His security team were already working on finding the perpetrator, but he wouldn’t be happy until he had Sandy safely by his side.

‘I’m worried about Kate, though,’ she said. ‘She’s not happy. Is she still angry with Paul?’

‘I don’t think so. A little confused by his attitude, maybe. He’s always been a private guy, never letting anyone get too close. That’s probably my fault for splitting from his mom instead of staying around when he was growing up. But, hey, we can’t go back. Underneath it all, he’s very sensitive, and I’m sure he cares for Kate. He just wants her to be safe.’

‘That’s so sad. I hope they can work it out. I thought they were getting along well before all this awful business. I’d hoped they’d be friends.’

Johnson had hoped so too. Paul had come alive in Kate’s presence. It was breaking his heart to see his son slip back behind his protective screen again.

He didn’t know how much he could tell Sandy without freaking her out, or even driving her away from him. Now that they’d found each other again, the thought of losing her was something he refused to contemplate, even if their children never worked things out.

‘Don’t worry, I’ll keep an eye on Kate. But it’s up to her and Paul to work this out for themselves. Just be careful, honey, and take care of yourself for a little longer. Hang in there ’til the end of this tour. Then we’ll work it out, I promise.’

Chapter Twenty-one

‘Hey, Paul, over here! Pull up a chair, man.’

A whole crowd of the JBB team were gathered round a large table in the hotel dining room. He made his way over to them, faltering only a little when he realised that Kate was amongst them. He’d successfully stayed away from her for a week now, but he guessed they were safe in a crowd.

Even when everyone shifted, leaving a space for Paul directly by Kate, he kept the smile on his face. He didn’t have to talk to her. Even if he was tempted to spill his guts and tell her the whole damned, sick, awful story. But he wouldn’t because it wouldn’t change anything. He’d learned his lessons the hard way.

He couldn’t resist looking at her though, and his sore heart squeezed tight with regret at the cool look she threw him before turning to her neighbour and going on with their conversation as though he was of no consequence to her at all.

It was just what he’d been trying to achieve, but it still made him feel like shit. She might be pissed with him right now, maybe even a little hurt by his attitude, but he’d learned from experience that it was safer that way. If some psycho was out there playing crazy games with the JBB again, then the farther he could push Kate away from him the better. Even if it did make him miserable.

‘Have you ordered?’ he directed his question at Kate, unable to resist the chance to speak to her, but one of the others replied.

‘Yeah, we told ’em to bring a mix of stuff. We’ll just get you a plate and you can share with us.’

‘Good call. Hope you said to bring plenty. I’m hungry’ he lied.

‘You’re always hungry – you should weigh a thousand pounds by now,’ someone complained. ‘Hey guys, do you remember at that restaurant in Dallas …’

Paul tuned out of the conversation. He’d heard the story too many times before. It became more exaggerated with every telling. Besides, he’d been a kid of fifteen at the time, in the middle of the mother of all growth spurts. Instead he pasted a smile on his face and focussed on breathing in the scent of the woman beside him.

It took a moment for him to realise Kate was staring straight at him. ‘What?’ he asked.

‘Ten desserts?’ she looked amused and appalled.

‘It was three,’ he sighed. ‘And it was one of those fancy places that gave you stupid little portions.’

She raised her eyebrows.

‘Hey, I was a growing boy!’

Kate joined in the general laughter, but he could see the confusion in her eyes. He couldn’t blame her. He wanted to gather her up in his arms and kiss away her doubts. Hell, he wanted to do a hell of a lot more than that. She was driving him crazy. He wanted her like no other woman he’d ever met. But he couldn’t do anything about it. It just wasn’t safe.

The incident with her mother’s phone reminded him just how dangerous it was for him to become involved with anyone. He could barely credit that his dad insisted on continuing his relationship with Kate’s mom. He shook his head. He hoped the old man knew what he was doing. She was a nice lady, and Paul didn’t like the idea that some crazy was playing games that could hurt her. He’d never forgive himself if Kate got caught up in that kind of madness on account of him.

He stood up abruptly. ‘Sorry guys, I just remembered, I’ve got to make a call. I’ll catch y’all later.’

Kate watched him leave, and wanted to scream. That was the nearest they’d had to a conversation in a week, and he’d wimped out.
What is wrong with him?

‘Is Paul OK?’ someone asked.

‘Sure. It’s just tour fever.’

‘Tour fever?’ Kate asked, knowing it was more likely her presence that drove him away. For a minute there she’d seen something in his eyes and she’d hoped …

‘Yeah. Don’t knock it. It’s OK being in the crew, no one’s interested in us guys. But Johnson and Paul and the band are under a lot of pressure – from the fans, from the press – no disrespect meant, Kate, you’re cool – but some of the paparazzi are crazy, man. They’ll do anything for a story.’

Kate thought about the uncomfortable conversations with her editor, and knew exactly what he meant. She liked to think she worked for one of the more respectable papers, but she was getting tired of arguing against producing the type of sensational gossip that her boss was demanding. Had she been so naïve before, thinking she could report ‘nice’ stories, finding the positive, the joy in what she was writing? She knew that she was rapidly coming to the point when she would have to make some serious decisions about her future.

‘But the fans can be worse. There was one crazy chick …’ he shook his head. ‘She ended up in an asylum. Should’ve gone to jail if you ask me, but hey, Johnson’s a nice guy. She cried some, and he felt sorry for the bitch.’

Kate felt the hairs stand up on the back of her neck. The Americans had been so close-mouthed that she was surprised that one of them had brought this up. She hadn’t found any reports about a stalker in her research. Maybe she should dig deeper.

‘What happened?’ Kate asked.

But one of the others murmured something, and he shrugged, looking guilty and uncomfortable. ‘Nothing,’ he said. ‘No one got hurt, and Johnson upped his security detail.’

Their food arrived and the others lost interest. With a sigh, Kate filled her plate and spent the next half hour pushing the food around with a fork, and tried to keep track of the rest of the conversation. Eventually she gave up and decided to go for a quick walk before returning to her room to work on her latest piece for the paper.

This week she’d chosen to look at the pressures of maintaining a home life while working as a tour crew member – long months away from home, unsociable hours, and hard physical work all took their toll on relationships. She’d started researching it in the hope that it would act as aversion therapy for herself, but she still ached to walk into Paul’s arms and forget about the rest of the world.

A brisk walk around the block of the city hotel did her the power of good, clearing her head and putting things into perspective. It had been a tough couple of weeks. The conversation at lunch had unsettled her too, but she couldn’t put a finger on it. There was something … She shook her head. It was no good. Better to stop worrying about it and concentrate on work. She needed to get a good 1500 words ready to email to the office.

As she turned the corner back into the road where the hotel entrance was located she stopped and cursed. The way in was blocked by a small crowd of people, some obviously press, others fans judging by their JBB T-shirts. The hotel staff were blocking the way and stopping them from entering. It never ceased to amaze her that, no matter how discreet they tried to be, the press and the fans always managed to track the band down. Kate turned on her heel and retraced her steps and made her way round to the staff entrance at the back.

No one challenged her as she made her way up the service stairs to her room, and Kate wondered if she ought to tell security about this. She could have been anyone. In fact, she decided, changing direction, she’d let them know straight away.

As she entered the lobby from the stairs, she didn’t see Paul, but she heard his voice. She stopped short, hearing her name mentioned by his companion, whose voice she recognised as one of the sound crew. She was hidden from their view by an elaborate arrangement of plants which served to divide the bar area from the main lobby.

‘So there’s nothing going on between you and Kate Armstrong?’

‘Come on, you know me better than that.’

‘Yeah, travel fast and take no baggage. She sure doesn’t fit your usual type. But you seemed pretty tight at first, especially at Jake’s birthday party. And wasn’t that her mom with your dad? Looked like pretty serious family business to me, man.’

‘It’s nobody’s business, OK? They’re just friends of the family. End of story.’

There was a pause. Kate wanted to walk over there and tell him that no, they weren’t friends.
Real friends didn’t blow hot and cold and leave you confused and frustrated.
She shook her head and turned to leave instead. The thought that he regarded her so lightly when he had turned her emotions upside-down was humiliating.

‘All right, so you don’t mind if I ask Kate for a date?’

She faltered, her head coming up, straining to hear what Paul would say to that. A smile fought to escape from her frowning face as she silently thanked the other man for the gentle boost to her ego.

Not that she would go out with him. He was nice enough, but she just wasn’t attracted to him. Kate wondered whether she would ever fancy another man after falling under Paul Brand’s spell.
Surely someone out there would measure up?
She just needed to move on, preferably as far away from his influence as possible.

‘I don’t think that would be a good idea,’ Paul’s voice sounded hard.

‘But you just said …’

‘Yeah, I know. Friends of the family. Which means Kate’s out of bounds for everyone, OK?’

She didn’t wait around to hear any more. Instead she went quietly back through the door and began climbing the stairs, her mind racing as she reviewed everything she’d just heard.

So, she wasn’t Paul’s usual type – that wasn’t news. She’d seen enough pictures of him with leggy blonde models to know that a petite brunette was definitely a deviation from the norm for him. And she and her mum were
just
friends of the family, eh? That’s not how her mother viewed her burgeoning relationship with Johnson, and she was pretty sure the rock star didn’t either. By the time she reached the third floor she was thoughtful. She didn’t believe for a minute that Paul thought of her like that.

You don’t kiss a family friend the way he kissed me. No, there’s more to it than …

She didn’t get a chance to finish the thought. As she reached it, the door crashed open, slamming into her with enough force to knock her back.

She cried out as she felt herself fall, was aware of someone rushing past her down the stairs before her head hit something hard. There was an explosion of white-hot pain behind her eyes before everything went black.