Obsession (Forbidden #2) (16 page)

‘Barry’s invited us to dinner.’

And that’s all it takes for my stomach to drop. And he notices that, and he smiles again as he gently runs his fingertips along my cheek in an attempt to placate me. It feels good, but this is normality creeping into our world now, and I’d rather it wasn’t happening. It’s kicking up too many reminders of something I struggle every day to forget.

‘Look, baby, I know you two…’ He briefly drops his gaze, just for a beat or two, before he lifts his head and his eyes lock with mine, his fingers still grazing my skin. ‘I know you two haven’t exactly hit it off…’

I raise an eyebrow at that understatement, and he laughs nervously.

‘He’s gonna try, Kira. I promise you, honey, he is gonna try.’

‘To, what? To accept that his brother is living with his whore?’

‘Jesus, Kira, come on…’

‘He won’t ever understand, Neal.’

‘Just let him try, baby, please. For me.’

I keep eye contact, and the feel of his body against mine is nice and safe and calming, but I’m still not sure that Barry is willing to try anything. I’m wary, and I think Neal probably should be, too. But Barry is his brother. His family. And I don’t think it’s my place to come between them, in any way. So I need to suck it up and see if Barry really is willing to try. I doubt he is. I’m still wary. But this is what Neal wants, and what Neal wants he gets, that’s my mission in life – to keep this man as happy as he makes me.

‘OK,’ I whisper, smiling as convincing a smile as I can summon up.

‘Thank you.’

He kisses me, and I melt into him. He’s got me, as he always has. Always will.

‘He has a new girlfriend himself, so, maybe this is what we all need, huh? A new start, for both Cannon brothers.’

Yeah. I think the glasses he’s wearing today may be slightly rose-tinted, or he’s just trying his hardest to make this right.

‘Maybe.’ I smile again and slide a hand around the back of his neck, pushing his head down, our mouths touching, and he’s kissing me, and I’m falling deeper and deeper into him. ‘Tonight?’

He nods, and I hate that the idea of doing something as normal as going to dinner makes me feel nervous.

‘What about the club?’

‘Alan’s got it all under control. We can head over there later, after dinner. It doesn’t really get going until after midnight anyway.’

He’s right. The Playroom is definitely one of those places where the early hours of the morning become the time of day of choice for those who inhabit our world. Our other world. The darker world I feel so much more comfortable in.

‘It’s gonna be OK, Kira. You’re over-thinking this, baby.’

Am I? He doesn’t know the things Barry’s said to me. The way he’s reacted to my presence in Neal’s life. He’s made his feelings completely clear, but I have no intention of telling Neal any of it. It isn’t my place to cause any more tension between him and his brother than there already is.

‘Going to dinner, couples dating… I’m just not used to this kind of normality, Neal.’

And I’m not. For ten years the only relationships I had with men were either with the drag queens and gay men who frequented Bam-Bams, or with the clients who paid me to have dinner with them; to sleep with them. What’s happening here, with Neal, this is so new to me it’s crazy. I’m thirty-six years old and this man is the first man I’ve had a real relationship with since – well, it’s been a long time, since things like dinner and dating have featured in my life. And that thought brings back the fear and the nerves I’d lost the second he kissed me. I need to lose them again. I need to fall back into that place I feel familiar in, our other world. Because this one’s sucking the life out of me, draining everything Kira Blu is and I can’t risk that.

‘I know, baby,’ he murmurs, and his mouth rests against mine, his hand in the small of my back pushing me closer to him. ‘I know.’

Every inch of him is touching me, and I can feel his erection throbbing against my thigh. It’s that quick, the time it takes to get him where I need him to be. Kira Blu is good at her job, she doesn’t even have to try. And that’s why she needs to stay here. She needs to take over everything I am or I’m scared I’m gonna lose this man. And I have to be prepared, for any fight I might have to undertake. I have to be prepared. For anything. For everything.

I reach down and cup his hard-on, stroking it lightly with my thumb, feeding off his low groans, every last one of them vibrating through into me because his mouth is still touching mine.

And then I step back and slide a hand up under my dress, tugging my knickers down until they hit the floor, stepping out of them and placing them on the desk behind us, and he knows – he knows what’s going to happen here.

He closes the door behind him, but the blinds aren’t down, and that exposed wall of windows means that anyone who walks into the gallery has a good chance of seeing us, but I really don’t care. I need him, I need that shot he gives me, I need it to get through every day now. And not just one hit. I need him all the time. I’m a junkie, an addict; obsessed.

He takes my hand and swings me around, throwing me back against the solid grey door, our eyes locked, and we laugh. And I love this, when we laugh and know that what we’re about to do is going to be so fucking amazing.

‘I used to be a good boy,’ he murmurs, and he smiles, and my world starts to make sense again.

I trail my fingertips along his beautiful jaw line as I move my mouth closer to his. ‘I was
never
a good girl.’

His mouth crashes down on to mine, the kiss desperate, hard, and my body’s crying out for its fix now. It needs that warm injection only he can give me.

‘We shouldn’t be doing this in here,’ he whispers, and I smile. I’m not in the mood to behave now.

‘No. You’re right. We shouldn’t.’ I reach down behind me and my fingers tighten around the door handle. ‘We should be out there.’

His face breaks into a slow grin as I open the door and back out, pulling him with me by his tie. ‘You sure like to take risks, Ms Blu.’

He knows. He already knows Kira Hardy has gone. That rule about Kira Blu only coming out after dark, it was always going to be broken. She’s too strong to be held down.

‘Risks are one hell of a turn-on, don’t you think? And anyway, Summer’s on her lunch, Barry’s not around, and I know we have no more appointments until after three, so…’ I kiss him, still holding on to his tie as I pull him against me, ‘let’s live dangerously. Besides, aren’t you supposed to be teaching me about art?’

He raises an eyebrow, something so sexy it makes my insides flip around like a bunch of uncoiled springs.

‘Show me what you got, Mr Cannon.’

He grabs hold of my dress and yanks it up over my hips, pushing me back against something hard and cold and I gasp as my skin connects with what I assume is another sculpture. But it’s strangely erotic, the cool surface of something I know is valuable touching me like this, even with its slightly sharp edges digging into my naked flesh. It just heightens everything, and I feel myself growing wetter as he slides a hand between my legs, forcing me to widen my stance.

‘You’re trouble, Ms Blu, do you know that?’

I smile, reaching behind me to grab on to the stone statue – I’m sure it’s stone. It feels like stone, and it’s…
Oh, Jesus!
He crouches down and pulls me apart, trailing his tongue along my slit from back to front, so slowly it causes me to cry out loud as a million tiny fireworks go off inside of me.

I close my eyes, my fingers gripping as best they can on to the sculpture I’m resting against as he continues to lick me out, and I fear my knees are going to give way any second because the longer he’s down there the weaker my legs are becoming. They can barely hold me up as it is, but it feels so fucking good! He does this so well; knows just where to touch me. He is without doubt the most experienced man I have ever had bring me to orgasm with his tongue. Most of the time I’d just faked it. But Neal Cannon, oh, Jesus, he is the real deal. And I’m falling fast here; his tongue is still working me, his fingers keeping me wide open and all around us I can hear the sound of a busy New York day through the open windows. But we’re two floors up here, so I don’t think anyone can see us, and I still think that’s a pity. I want the world to watch Neal take me like this. Or the members of our club, at least. I still want that to happen, I really do, because we look so fucking hot when we’re together.
Too
fucking hot!

I feel him pull away, leaving me hovering on the edge of that beautiful precipice and I open my eyes as he stands up, watching as he wipes his mouth with his forearm and smiles. And he has no idea how sexy that is, no fucking idea.

‘You better be finishing that job, mister.’ I reach for his tie again and pull him closer. ‘Because I am going crazy here.’

He groans as I start to unzip him, taking his hard and ready cock in my hand, our mouths crashing together in a hot, heavy kiss as he pushes me right back against the statue and I once more ignore its rough edges as they dig into me. Any pain I’m feeling is cancelled out by his cock sliding into me; he’s the perfect fit. We come together so beautifully; become one, like we were always meant to be this way, and I close my eyes as our bodies rock together, his arms holding me steady, cocooning me against him and I never want to let go.

‘Open your eyes, baby.’

I must remember he likes me to look at him when he’s inside me. He likes that, and I need to keep him happy, it’s all I want to do now – keep him happy. So I open my eyes and he cups my cheek and kisses me, and everything else just fades into oblivion.

‘I love you, Kira,’ he murmurs, so quietly I barely hear him, but his mouth is so close to mine, his breath falling into me with every word he speaks as his hands hold tightly on to my hips, his body deep inside mine.

‘I love you, too, baby,’ I whisper, and he lifts me up, my legs wrapping around him as his thrusts become that little bit harder. Oh, God, do I love him too!

He finally allows me to break the stare, and I close my eyes and bury my face in his hair as I feel that surge of delicious tingles start to work their way up my body, and I shiver gently in his arms, and he knows, he can tell I’m close, but there’s a part of me that doesn’t want it to end yet. I want more, of this, of him. When he’s inside me nothing else matters.

‘Not yet,’ I whisper, unwrapping my legs from around him and he pulls back slightly, and he smiles. He gets it. He’s not ready yet, either.

‘Turn around.’ His lips brush that space just below my ear and I shiver as I turn away from him. He pushes me against the cool stone, his hands on my hips pulling my bottom back against him and he’s inside me again within seconds, his arm around my waist pulling me up so our bodies are together, every inch of him touching me, and I don’t ever want to think of a time when we don’t spend every day and every night like this, together. Fucking. But this is so gentle, what’s happening now. So slow and beautiful and I keep my eyes closed as I feel his breath on the back of my neck, hear him whispering filthy things in my ear that make me moan and smile. And he drops his hand, his fingers finding my aching, willing clit and he touches me, and I jerk slightly because everything is so sensitive. But I want him to touch me, everywhere, anywhere, it’s what I live for now. He’s taken me over, invaded every part of me and I can’t win this thing. I’m waving the white flag and surrendering everything, to him.

All that I have he can take.

All that I am he can use.

It’s over.

He’s won.

Kira Blu belongs to you, Mr Cannon.

She belongs to you…

Sixteen

Neal

She didn’t really want to do this, come here, to Barry’s. And if I’m being honest it wasn’t something I’ve been looking forward to myself, but he promised me he’s going to make an effort now. He’s going to try and start to understand just what it is Kira and I have, although, quite how he or anyone else can even begin to do that when neither she nor I understand it ourselves I have no idea.

I look at her out the corner of my eye as the taxi nears Barry’s apartment in Manhattan’s Lower East Side. It’s only a short twenty minute drive but she’s barely spoken throughout it. And that has nothing to do with me, or us – we’re fine. She just doesn’t want to be here, going to dinner with my brother, a man who refuses to believe that what me and Kira have is real. But it’s very real.

I reach over and take her hand, and her fingers curl around mine but she keeps her eyes focused on the window, she doesn’t look at me. But I want to look at
her
.

‘Kira? Baby?’

She squeezes my hand and slowly turns her head to face me.

‘It’s gonna be OK, darlin’. Everything that’s happened, it’s all just taking a bit of time to get used to, for everyone else as well as us.’

‘He’ll never understand, Neal. And I keep saying that because I think it’s true. I don’t think anyone will ever understand…’

I touch her cheek and gently pull her closer, kissing her softly, our lips barely touching but it’s enough to send my stomach into spasms. She smells of lime and coconut and she tastes beautiful, and if I could I would take her right here in the back of this taxi.

I kiss her again, more forcefully this time, and all I want to do is tear her panties off and spread her legs so wide she cries out for the kind of mercy I’m not willing to give her. I want to take her roughly, dig my fingers into the warm flesh that surrounds her achingly beautiful hips as my cock thrusts into her. I need that satisfaction, even though we’ve already fucked more times than I care to think about today. How we aren’t worn down to the shattered and fragile souls we should be after all the sex we have is beyond me. But we keep going; keep fucking our way through every new and incredible day God throws our way.

‘Nobody else
needs
to understand, Kira. OK?’ And I’m right. Maybe Barry never
will
understand, but I’m ceasing to care now. It’s too tiring, trying to pretend that what Kira and I share is something normal and ordinary, when it isn’t. It’s dark and wrong and confusing, but it’s everything I need. ‘The rest of the world can fuck off, baby, it doesn’t matter. But he’s my brother, and he’s promised he’s going to try and get his head around our crazy relationship.’ I smile, because saying it out loud makes it sound so pointless. What we’re doing here, we’re keeping up appearances for the sake of everyone around us. We’re not doing this for us. ‘Let’s just give him the benefit of the doubt, huh? And if nothing else we’ll get a great dinner. Because if there’s one thing Barry’s better at than me it’s cooking.’

‘
He’s
cooking dinner?’

She raises a surprised eyebrow and I laugh. The mood’s lightening, and that’s good. It’s nice. ‘Yeah. He’s cooking dinner. So, you hungry, Ms Blu?’

She smiles and leans forward, nipping my bottom lip with her teeth. ‘For food?’

I laugh quietly and kiss her again, and I wish we were back at home, safe behind the doors of our private playroom. Alone. I’m finding it harder and harder to control this insane urge to touch her; fuck her. It’s almost constant now, even in my sleep she’s with me. Beside me. ‘Well, you ain’t getting nothing else at my brother’s, darlin’.’

Her smile widens, and there’s a look in her eyes that’s got my cock hard,
Jesus!
There’s no freaking let up! She’s killing me with her dirty mind and her silent promises.

‘Are you telling me, Mr Cannon, that even the thought of fucking me in your uptight brother’s bathroom doesn’t turn you on? Just a little bit?’

‘Bathroom?’ It’s my turn to raise an eyebrow. Although, I don’t know why. Bathroom, bedroom, hallway – we’ll fuck anywhere. And yeah, it does turn me on, actually, the thought of defiling any room in my brother’s house by slamming Kira up against the wall and taking her like tomorrow’s never coming. But
she
will be. So fucking hard her head’ll spin.

I can’t stop the grin from spreading across my face. ‘OK, Ms Blu. You got me.’

She got me good.

‘I like to know I’m still good at my job.’ She leans in to me and kisses me, catching my mouth slightly open and the second she slips her tongue inside I feel like I’m gonna explode. My cock, it’s freaking painful, man!

‘Oh, you’re still good, baby.’

She laughs, a low, husky laugh and I am out of control.

‘We get to Barry’s, you say you need the bathroom, OK?’ I murmur, my mouth resting lightly against hers. Both our breathing is heavy and strained and I need to take her now. I need to have something, because I’m not gonna last the journey.

She nods and takes my hand, placing it on her thigh and I slide it slowly up her dress, watching as she bites down on her lip, her eyes telling me I’m about to hit the jackpot. Yeah. There it is. She’s not wearing any panties. I’m touching her, and she’s wet, and her eyes are begging me to take her this way despite the fact the driver can probably guess what’s happening here. But we don’t care if people watch now. We don’t fucking care, we like it.

I keep my eyes on hers as my fingers enter her, slipping inside her with such ease, and her quiet sighs spur me on, causing me to thrust gently but quickly because we’re almost at Barry’s now.

She opens her legs just a touch wider and I press my hand against her, plunging my fingers deeper, and I’m rubbing her clit and kissing her hard until she comes in a barrage of self-controlled waves and tiny sighs, her teeth biting down on my lip as she climaxes. And when I pull my hand away from her its soaking, but she’s ready with a wet wipe she’s pulled out of her purse, and as I hand it back to her I watch as she reaches up under her dress and wipes herself, much to the surprise of the taxi driver. But she knew he was watching. That’s why she did it. And she has no idea how fucking sexy that was. Two seconds, that’s all it took for her to make me need her again. Two fucking seconds.

We finally pull up outside Barry’s apartment housed within an imposing, almost office-style building on Chrystie Street. And as I pay the driver, making sure he gets a bigger than usual tip, she stands on the sidewalk and looks up at the sky, shielding her eyes as though the sun’s hitting her. But it’s dark now. There’s nothing up there but stars punctuating the blackness.

‘It’s different, out here.’

She turns to look me, and she smiles, and she looks so young. So beautiful. And there’s a child-like excitement on her face, such a contrast to the almost troubled look she’d carried with her when we’d left the penthouse.

‘To back home, I mean. In Newcastle.’

She still thinks of Newcastle as home? I’ve gotta change that. She needs to think of Manhattan as home. This is where she belongs now. Here. With me.

‘When I used to live in…’

She stops talking and bows her head, staring at the ground. I get the feeling she was about to say something she doesn’t really want to share with me, and it feels like a kick to the stomach, that there are still things she keeps from me. But I don’t want to push her on her past. I don’t want her to go there again, but if she ever needs to talk I’ll be here. I hope she knows that.

I rest my hand gently on her hip and she looks up at me, a small smile on her beautiful face and I pull her closer, wrapping her in my arms because, suddenly, all I want to do is protect her. From what? From a part of her past that’s still affecting her future? I kiss her forehead and she snuggles against me, and for a moment that rare wave of normality washes over us. For a few, brief seconds we’re just an ordinary couple on an ordinary street. But that’s not what we really are; not
who
we really are, or ever will be.

I tuck a finger under her chin and tilt up her head, and I kiss her again, and she holds on to me so tight, man, I fucking love that feeling!

‘We don’t
have
to do this, Kira. Not if you really don’t want to.’

She smiles, and it’s a wider smile now. Whatever was on her mind a second ago, it’s gone now. ‘Yeah. We do, handsome. You’re right – he’s your brother, and me and him, we need to stop acting like kids and start acting like grown-ups.’

I smile too, because she makes me want to. I didn’t have much of a reason to smile, until she sashayed into my messed-up world, all hot-as-hell hips with a mouth that grips my cock like a vice and can make me come within seconds,
Jesus!
How I get through each freaking day now is a miracle. ‘I kinda like it when you do grown-up things,’ I murmur, leaving my mouth close to hers, and she laughs, and I feel it, right there on my lips – her laugh. A sexy, soulful sound that has me aching for her. Yeah. Like I said, that wave of normality was a rare thing.

‘Want to do some grown-up things in Barry’s bathroom, Mr Cannon?’

‘You bet your beautiful ass I do, Ms Blu.’

I slide a hand down to cup that beautiful ass, squeezing it hard and she moans against me, and I remember she’s not wearing any panties… man, I am
dying
here!

‘Come on, baby.’

I take her hand and we practically run into the building, and my heart is beating so fast I’m finding it hard to breathe, but the feeling being with this woman gives me is something I don’t ever want to give up. I never want to lose this.

As we wait for the elevator I slide my hand back down on to her ass, her fingers playing with the hair at the back of my neck, and as soon as the elevator doors open we’re inside, alone, and I throw her back against the wall and kiss her like crazy before the doors have even had a chance to close. But I need to taste her. I need to
take
her. I just fucking need her…

Kira

Barry’s apartment is much smaller and a lot more cluttered than Neal’s. I want to say more lived-in, but that wouldn’t be entirely true. That kind of conjures up images of mess, and this place is anything but messy. It’s just more full of things than Neal’s penthouse. Things. I can’t help smiling to myself. That’s what I call the paintings and pieces of art Neal’s collected over the years. Things.

‘Something funny?’

I turn and catch his mouth in a quick kiss, and even that sends my stomach into overdrive. ‘Just thinking about something, that’s all.’

He doesn’t ask what, exactly, but that’s because he’s got something else on his mind, I can tell. And I know what that is. We both do.

He drops a hand to my thigh and nudges me closer, his mouth touching mine as he speaks. ‘Don’t you need to pee or something?’

‘Mr Cannon,’ I mock gasp, ‘we’re not in the playroom now.’

‘No, I don’t… well, I
do
, I mean, if you
do
need to pee…’

‘I don’t need to pee. Well, not unless you
want
me to.’ I smile, and I know I’m teasing him now but I like it. I like teasing him. I know what it does to him. ‘It’s OK, handsome. I’m just playing with you.’

‘Oh, baby, I wish you were.’ He takes my hand and pulls me towards the door, where Barry’s standing nervously checking his watch. He’s barely said two words to me since we got here, but that’s because
he’s
got something else on his mind, too. His new girlfriend hasn’t arrived yet, and even though he’s assured us she’s just running late, I’m almost certain it’s himself he’s trying to convince rather than me and Neal. ‘I’m gonna give Kira a guided tour of the apartment,’ Neal says as we pass Barry in the doorway.