Nobody's Dream (46 page)

“Hey, no tears.” Luke’s thumb brushed away a tear from her cheek, and Cassie took a step back dashing away the remaining tears herself. “They’re okay on the other side, remember?”

She nodded, letting him think her tears were for his wife and baby. Perhaps they were the lucky ones. Their difficult journey was over, at least for this lifetime. Hers stretched out forever in front of her, a long, lonely road.

“Sorry. I will go fix dinner now. I just wanted to put my things away. Are you sure about having me stay in your bedroom? You know I am not used to anything as enormous as this. I can sleep on a cot or on the floor if need be.”

“We already settled that. I’ll meet you in the kitchen, and we’ll see what we can rustle up.”

Cassie nodded and watched him leave the room. She breathed deeply, not realizing she had been taking only shallow breaths while standing next to Lucas. Her body responded to him as if afraid although she knew there was nothing to be afraid of with him. Why was the feeling the same but different?

She placed her bag on the blanket chest at the foot of the bed, went to the bathroom to wash her face and hands, and then headed toward the kitchen. Unpacking would not take long. She could deal with that later. For now, she wanted to feel useful and show her appreciation to Lucas for giving her and her alpacas a safe place to live.

For saving her life.

Apparently,
Mama Quilla
was not finished with her yet.

*     *     *

Luke opened the door to the walk-in pantry. “Let me know what’s workable. There’s onions and potatoes in that bin over there.” When she hesitated, he realized she wasn’t going to go inside as long as he was standing at the door. “I’ll check the fridge and see what’s still edible. Haven’t been grocery shopping all week.”

As soon as he moved away from the door, she stepped inside, and he heard her moving things around on the shelves. In the fridge, he found carrots, tomatoes, and lettuce in the crisper and pulled out a couple of steaks from the freezer. Perfect. She didn’t seem to have meat in her budget. This would be a real treat.

“How about a cookout, Cassie? I can fire up the grill in no time.”

She stepped out of the pantry with several cans of vegetables in her arms and stared at the butcher-paper wrapped packages he held before glancing up at him.

“I’m vegetarian, but you go ahead if you want to eat that.”

Damn, he just figured she didn’t have any meat at her place. Not that she had sworn off meat altogether. Then he remembered their first real date and the face she’d given him when he’d suggested a steakhouse—as if he’d asked her to eat road kill. Why didn’t she just come out and tell him before?

How could she stay strong and healthy without any meat protein? He checked out the cans she’d chosen and saw broth, whole-kernel corn, and black beans. He supposed beans were where her protein came from and remembered her serving a lot of them while he was at the cabin.

“Maybe I’d better leave the cooking to you tonight. I’m so hungry I could eat a…” Okay, better not finish that sentence with any of the usual clichés. “Anything you make will be perfect. What do you want me to do?” For starters, he put the steaks back in the freezer.

“Baked potatoes would be good.”

Yeah, with his appetite, that just might help. But he’d had no problem eating his fill on the wholesome meals she prepared at the cabin.

This woman sure can cook up a storm.

He walked around her, hating the way she stiffened as he came near her, and entered the pantry to grab some spuds. He wished she wouldn’t be so skittish around him, but maybe with time, she’d come to realize he wasn’t going to hurt her. He’d worked with enough abused horses to know time and patience were the only way to cure that.

Luke oiled and wrapped the potatoes and placed them on the center rack in the oven. Cassie was busy filling a Dutch oven with the ingredients for what he guessed would be a soup or stew. “Hey, I just remembered that there are some scallions ready out in the garden. Let me yank up a few. They should be good in that soup.”

She smiled at him. “You have a garden?”

“Well, it’s pitiful compared to the ones my mom tended, but I try to enjoy a few of the basics in the summer.” He went outside the back door and came back a few minutes later with a handful of scallions. After washing them off, he brought them over to the island and laid them on the cutting board. Once again, Cassie’s body went on the alert with his close proximity, and he stepped away from her.

“Might be too many cooks in this kitchen. I’ll leave you to finish up in here while I go make up the bed in the studio.”

“Lucas, you are certain you do not mind?”

He grinned. “I’m enjoying the company. Don’t mind at all.”

She nibbled on her lower lip, and he figured he needed to leave—fast. Damn, but her innocent sensuality would tempt a monk. Luke might have lived almost like a monk since Maggie died, but that didn’t mean he planned to be one forever.

He needed to face it. His marriage to Cassie might never include anything more than companionship. She reminded him of his early days with O’Keeffe. She had some serious issues concerning men. Lord knows someone had hurt her bad. Would pushing her limits help or hurt?

Tonight he’d just enjoy their time to sit down and talk over dinner. A second chance. He hoped to get closer to her. Maybe being on his own turf would give him an advantage. Just spending time with her every day was a big improvement. That was enough for right now. If anything came of this relationship, so be it, but he’d learned a long time ago not to let his hopes rise too high.

“Be back in a bit.” He left the kitchen by the back door again and crossed the yard to the simple structure he’d built as his studio and woodworking shop. The smell of pine and cedar assailed him as he walked into the cluttered space. He had a number of projects going at once, as always. He should have built a bigger space, but he had been on a tight budget after buying this spread in foreclosure and paying the back taxes, to say nothing of the expenses for the mustangs.

Besides, he’d been so busy with the horses and the baby furniture lately that he’d fallen behind on his work here. The headboard he needed to repair for Damián and Savannah sat against the wall, and he’d been working for the past two months on an intricate piece of suspension equipment for Gunnar’s dungeon in Breckenridge. Of course, everyone understood how his accident had put him behind. No one was being hard on him but himself.

He’d always been harder on himself than anyone else had been. Well, except maybe his dad.

The cot was covered with tools and hardware, so he cleared them off and went to the cabinet in the bathroom for fresh linens. The cot was stripped and made up in no time. He wondered if he should give Cassie more time to adjust to his place before returning to the house. No. She would spend too much time in her head imagining the worst from him and only make matters, well, worse.

He headed back to the house and entered through the kitchen door. Cassie’s face and hands were covered in flour as she kneaded a loaf of bread.
Damn
.

“You don’t have to go to all that trouble for me, Cassie.”

She blew a puff out of the corner of her mouth to get the hair out of her eyes. “No trouble. I like being useful. I needed something to do while the soup simmered.”

He couldn’t very well tell her to stop when she was almost finished. “Did you see I had your amaranth flour here?”

She nodded and smiled. “I brought a loaf with me, but this one’s for tomorrow.”

“Soup smells great.” How did she and Angel do it? He’d never made those canned goods and staples come out like a gourmet meal. He walked over and lifted the lid.

“No peeking! You will let the flavor escape!”

He smiled as he replaced the lid. “Yes, ma’am. I’ll put in a load of laundry and set the table.”

After returning from the bathroom with the basket in hand, he went straight to the laundry room near the back entrance. He poured a cup of detergent into the bottom and began pulling her clothing out. Something hard in her pocket made him check. Probably some money she’d forgotten about.

He pulled the folded paper out. Tossing the jeans into the washer, he didn’t have to unfold the paper to know what it said. He’d written the words himself—the night before their wedding.

Luke grinned. She’d fled her home with very few possessions. That she had brought their wedding vows with her told him he might have made some kind of connection with her.

He put the paper in his pocket. He’d leave it on her nightstand before dinner. After starting the washer, he returned to the kitchen. She covered the dough with a dishtowel to let it rise. He didn’t say anything, but rinsed his hands off at the sink nearby. He then set two placemats at a ninety-degree angle to each other on one corner of the table. When she brought in the bowls of soup, she eyed the proximity of the placemats a moment. He’d let her contemplate that while he went into the kitchen for a pitcher of iced tea and two glasses of ice.

In the dining area, he saw she’d moved her place setting across the table from his. Luke sighed. Okay, he’d give her some space tonight. She’d been through a lot today.

Now, what would be a non-threatening topic of conversation?

“So did you deliver everything to the gallery for the showing?”

“Yes, thank the Goddess. I would never have been able to save the pieces when I fled.” She ate without making eye contact with him.

Her religion might be a topic to explore, but didn’t society always say not to talk about politics and religion? Better stick to art and animals for now, although someday he wanted to explore her thoughts about spirituality and the afterlife. He’d read a lot, but had never been around anyone who seemed to live what he’d only studied intellectually.

“Is there a particular theme with this show?”

“No. Mixed media. A progression of my work over the years. I will be doing a watercolor workshop for gifted students in one of the Denver high schools.”

“How’s the work with the alpaca fleece coming?”

Her face became more animated as she spoke, and she set her spoon down inside the bowl. “It takes so much time to prepare the fiber, but I am loving working with it. Very earthy, vital. It will take a while before my alpacas produce enough fleece to include in my artwork, but I enjoy having the animals for companionship mostly. Fortunately, there are ranchers in the area I can purchase fleece from while I continue to experiment.”

A shadow crossed her face. No doubt she was thinking about the fate of her mountain sanctuary now.

“After dinner, I’ll call the fire station and see if there is any report on damage up your way.”

“Would you? The not knowing…”

“Sure. The dispatcher may not have an answer right away, but she’ll relay a message. I saw a couple of Angel’s brothers up there working the fire.”

“Why are you not out with them?”

“I’m not trained for firefighting, but I’m on call in case there’s a need for search and rescue. My beeper hasn’t made a sound. That’s a good thing, because it means no one else is in danger.”

She cast her gaze down and picked up her spoon again. “You did have a mission today. You saved our lives.” She met his gaze. “Thank you.”

“Now we’re even. What do you call it? Karma?”

She smiled. “Something like that. It does not normally happen that fast, though. Sometimes not between the same people or even in the same lifetime.”

“I don’t want to think about living any other lifetimes. It’s enough for me to make it through this one.”

Would he be punished for the things he’d done wrong in this life and have to live through similar shit again until he learned his lessons?

Lord, I hope not
.

Time to change the subject. “Soup’s delicious. My compliments to the chef.”

“I do not do anything fancy in the kitchen.”

“Oh, but what you did was just what I needed tonight. Worked up an appetite.” Damn. He didn’t mean to remind her about what they’d been through today. Seeing that they were finished, he stood and picked up his bowl. “Since you cooked, I’ll do dishes.”

“I will carry mine to the sink.” He followed her, watching the sway of her hips under his shirt before he came to stand beside her at the sink.

“Before I turn in, I am going to check on my girls. They might be frightened after today’s experience.”

“Sure thing. They’ve been in that stall before, though. I’m sure they’ll adjust in no time. I’ll be out in a little bit.”

She nearly ran from the room, and he figured she was the one who was frightened. How could he make her feel at home here? Feel safe?

Trust him?

After he finished the dishes, stacking them in the dishwasher he rarely ran, he went into the bedroom and pulled the vows from his pocket. He set them on the nightstand and walked out of the room.

*     *     *

Cassie rounded the house and glanced up at the mountain. The fire had spread. She wasn’t sure exactly where her cabin was located and whether the fire had come close—or already destroyed it. Not knowing was the hardest.

She hurried inside the barn and took refuge in the stall with her alpacas. They all came to her, whether seeking food or just some reassurance, she did not know, but she touched and spoke to each one to make sure they knew she had not abandoned them.

Lucas seemed to be trying really hard to make Cassie feel at home, too. Why was it so difficult to accept his hospitality—or his nearness?

A heavy weariness overcame her. She should go back inside the house and prepare for bed, but she was not ready to engage in further conversation with Lucas. Seeing Milagrosa curled up asleep in the straw, she went to her and lay down beside her, burying her fingers in the cria’s soft fur.

Safe. The animal’s soft breathing comforted Cassie. If only she could stay out here tonight rather than sleep in Lucas’s bed.

Had he even changed the sheets this morning? Would his scent be on the pillow? He smelled of leather and male, a once-pleasant scent reminding her of her homeland, but she no longer wanted to be reminded of that place.