No Turning Back (Full Circle) (4 page)

To my left are Anna and Tori. Yet again, these two look like they don't match as roommates, but there is something different.  I have a feeling these two have more in common than they know. 

Crystal and I make our way outside and walk toward the train track.  It is about four o'clock, and we are supposed to meet on the lawn in front of Rush dorm to have some "Freshman Fun." 
Seriously. WTH?

"So, Charley, how excited are you about this?"

"I’ve been waiting for this all day!
Haven't you?!
"  I say sarcastically.  I have never been one that likes to play the get-to-know-you icebreaker shit. 

"We might get along more than I thought, Charley.  I had that exact same thought." Crystal smiles at me and across the street we go.

We walk to the front lawn and divide in our groups.  I notice two girls that look like they have been lifelong friends.  Then they talk, and their accents are dynamically different. This must be what happens when you come to Orientation.  The "Freshman Fun" leader, Lucas, starts to talk.  He is well over six feet tall, dark hair, and looks like he spends hours in the gym.  I guess I can handle the next thirty minutes of torture if I can look at him. 

I look around in my group to see if I recognize anyone.  Caroline is in my group.  At least she’s a familiar face.

I'm brought back to reality by Lucas explaining the game I love to hate.  I'm going to have to come up with some cheesy animal name for myself that starts with “C”.  Hummm.  I’m thinking, "Cougar Charley."  That will get someone's attention.  Or at least a good laugh. It does, and this torture is almost over. 

Since I’ve played the stupid game, I take a minute to look at my surroundings.  By that I don’t mean Mother Nature.  I notice a couple that seems to be pretty friendly, a couple of guys who look like they stepped out of GQ, and a tan, blonde-haired guy with piercing blue eyes. He looks like he has lived on the beach all summer long.  He is absolutely scrumptious.  I realize his name is Joe after he refers to himself as “Jackalope Joe.”  I think I might want to know a little more about him. 

As I’m daydreaming about Jackalope Joe, I’m brought back to reality by Lucas.  He thanks us all for coming, and then tells us the café is open for dinner at six.  I decide to walk back to Kluft.  While waiting to cross the road, Caroline catches up to me. 

"Hey, you're Charley, right?"

"Yeah.”

“Want to go grab supper?"

"Sure, thank goodness you said supper.  I almost didn't know what he was talkin' about." 

We both just laugh. 

“I had that same thought, Charley.  What the hell is
dinner
?  We call it supper where I’m from.”

We make our way in front of Hope Science Building and go down the spiral metal staircase to enter the café. 

We are about halfway down the steps when I notice a group of smoking hot guys.  I look at them and smile as innocent as possible. 

“So, Caroline, do you know of anything to do around here?  I mean there is like nothing within a thirty-mile radius.”

“I heard there’s always a party somewhere on campus.  Just gotta know who to talk to, and who to get the liquor.”

“Oh, okay.”  I’m sure not about to put it all out there that I’m not a big drinker. 

We make our way into the cafe'.  I think we just walked into a pack of wolves and every set of eyes are staring at us.  I mean like damn, take a picture! I hand over my ID card, it's swiped, then handed back.  We go into the line.  I grab a tray that looks like it's as old as I am.

We make our way through the line.  I grab a chicken salad, Diet Coke, and a chocolate chip cookie.  Caroline does the same. 

As we walk out of the food line, I notice a group of girls waving at us.

“Looks like Kluft second floor is eating together.  Guess that means us too,” I say as I look at Caroline.

“Hey, at least were not like those two over there.  I’m so glad I didn’t have to walk in here by myself.”

“I know what ya mean, Caroline.”

We eat at the round table with Georgia, Anna, Tori, Cassie, and Jenny.  Everyone but Anna, Caroline and I play a sport here.  I wonder if that’s the norm? 

“Hey, Charley, do you play any sports?” asks Tori as she eats a bowl of ice cream. Ah shit, I’d really hoped I could avoid this part of my life.

“I used to swim in high school.  I’ve swum competitively since fourth grade.”

“That’s awesome!  You should really walk on our team.  Georgia, Cassie and I all swim here.  We have the most awesome coach, too!”

“I’ll think about it.  I just never really thought I was good enough to compete on a college level.  So, Anna and Jenny, what do ya’ll do on campus?”

Anna blurts out, “The only sport I’m into is the male species.  I’m always on the hunt.”

“I play basketball,” says Jenny.

We finish eating and walk back to Kluft.  We all go into our rooms.  Jenny turns on the radio, and it blares through the hallway.  Crystal is back.

“Did you eat supper?  I didn’t see you in the café.”

“Lord, no, I just went and fed my appetite in other ways,” she says laughingly.

I give her my
what the hell are you talking about
look. Then it dawns on me.  I can be so gullible sometimes.  

“Ya know I met a few of the basketball guys today during Orientation.  Looks like they already know where the fun will be.  I’m going over to Irvin now to meet up with Lucas.  He said that if we wanted anything from the store, they would get it for us.”

“Thanks, but no thanks.  I’m not a big drinker.  Thanks for asking though.”

“Well, I’m heading over that way.  I’ll see ya later.”

All I know is this is going to be interesting.  I can already tell my roommate prediction might be somewhat right.  I hope not. 

I’m in my room when I get a text from Cash.  Shit.

Cash: Hope all ur dreams come true.  I’ll be here if u need me.

Me: Thanks, $. I just have one question… y now?

Cash: I was being stupid.  I’ve seen u through everything & I couldn’t let u leave w/out u knowing how I felt about us.

Me: Really? U know that there’s a place for only u in my heart, but I need to live a little.

Cash: I know.  Just don’t find trouble.  Promise me that.

Me: I won’t

Or at least I’m going to try not to find trouble.  The evening moves like it’s on fast forward.  I’m checking out the classes I have when Crystal bursts in the room with about three guys.  They are definitely not my type. 

“Hey, Charley, there’s a party over at the Soccer House.  Wanna go?”

I throw the schedule on the desk. “Sure why not.  Give me five, and I’ll be ready to go.”  It’s been a pretty good day. Why not make it an unforgettable night?  Let’s see if I can stay away from trouble!

Chapter 3:
Soccer Party

I take a few minutes to look at myself in the mirror.  What the hell am I going to wear?  In my closet I find white jean shorts, a hot pink crocheted vest top, and a pair of wedge sandals.  I want to look cute, but don’t want it to look like I took hours to look good.  I pull my hair up into a messy bun, touch up my makeup, and apply Aruba Coconut lotion to my legs and arms.  I take one last look in the mirror on the back of the door, and I’m ready to go.

When I open the door, I don’t see Crystal, but I hear her down the hall.  Crystal and the three guys, Lucas, Jordan, and Nick, are in Caroline’s room. 

“Hey, Charley. We’re going to chill in Caroline’s room for a while,” Crystal says as she pokes her head out of the doorway.

“Okay.”

“Come on in; we’re just drinkin’ a little bit before we go.”

Oh gosh, here we go.  I’m not big on drinking, but I really do want to live a little and fit in.  So, what the hell.  Why not? 

I go into Caroline’s room and see a cooler with God knows what in it.  I’m afraid to even ask what is in it.

“Want some PJ?” Caroline asks in her strong Southern accent.

“What’s in it?”

“Ya know, a little bit of everything, and those strawberries will knock you on your ass after while!”

“So, are we trying to get fucked up tonight?”  I say sarcastically.

“We totally are!  So, you want some or not?”

“I’m not too big on drinkin’, I’ll try a little.” 

As I fill a red Solo cup, I realize this is a decision that I shouldn’t make, but for some reason I can’t help myself.  I want to fit in, I want to live, and I want to forget about my past and Cash.  This PJ is my way of doing that tonight.

After hanging out in Caroline’s room for about thirty minutes, we all head off campus to the soccer party at the Soccer House with our PJ in hand.  As we walk, I can already feel the effects the PJ is having on my body, but I don’t care.  We walk down the side of the highway.  Caroline and I walk side by side with our arms locked. 

Caroline looks at me and says, “I just love you! We are going to have so much fun tonight!”

The closer we get to the house, the louder it gets.  I can hear the bass thumping and know that a good time waits inside.  I have one thought and one thought only.  Will Jackalope Joe be here?  I have got to get him outta my head.  A boy who looks that damn good is nothing but trouble. I am sure of that!

We walk in and this house looks like the furniture was picked up off the side of the road.  Can you say thrift shop?  There are people everywhere.  As we make our way to the kitchen, Crystal, Lucas, Caroline and I bump into about a hundred people.  Lucas informs us that since we are with him, nobody will touch our stuff.  Well, I guess I’m super glad that my roommate is sleeping with Mr. Big Man on Campus.  With that being said, we find a corner to call our spot and pour ourselves another cup of PJ as Caroline sings, “
Red Solo cup, I  fill you up, Let’s have a party, Let’s have a party; I love you, red Solo cup, I lift you up, proceed to party, proceed to party.”
  I really hope she isn’t a music major, but I do know what her ringtone is gonna be on my phone.

Crystal and Lucas go on about their business while Caroline and I take our cups and mingle.  I recognize a few faces, but no one really stands out.  That is until I look across the living room, and I see
him
.  I try to act like I don’t see him, but I think it’s damn near impossible to miss someone that damn fine.  I notice that Georgia, Tori, Jenny, Anna, and Cassie have arrived, and I can tell they have all had one too many.  They run over to Caroline and me talking way too loud and acting too excited.  We all claim the spot we’re standing in and just talk about random shit.

The next thing I know, I hear Caroline shout. “Ohmygod y’all! Do you see that wonderful specimen of a man over there?” as she nonchalantly points across the room. 
Let’s don’t be obvious or anything!

I look across the room and see a guy wearing jeans that fit right below his waist, white v-neck t-shirt, and a pair of Sanuks.  He has the perfect color of sandy blonde oh so messy hair that I want to put my hands in.  Then there are those eyes.  Those eyes are beyond perfect.  In fact, I think they match the Caribbean waters to a tee.  I try my best not to let him know I’m staring, but damn, I just can’t help it.  I give him a cute smile and then look back at the Kluft second floor girls.

“Uh, Charley, hellloooo? Do you see him?  He was soooooo checking you out!” 

“He was not, but oh my holy goodness, he’s like the hottest thing I’ve seen since I got here.  Isn’t his name Joe?  I think he was in our group today.” 
Like I don’t recognize him!

“You are so right, Charley!  Your name was priceless today! Cougar Charley, no way anyone’s going to forget that!”

“Hey, let’s hit the dance floor.”  I take Caroline’s arm while the rest of the Kluft girls follow us, and we hit the make shift dance floor in the living room.  They are playing Mobb Deep’s “Quiet Storm.”  It’s old, but I love the beat.  We hit the middle of the floor and start swaying our hips to the music.  We giggle like school girls as we notice the guys in the room taking note.  A few others join us, Crystal and Lucas included.

“If they’re watchin’, let’s show them how we Southern girls have a good time,” I say to Caroline.

“You got it!”

We add just a little more emphasis to our hips and start dancing with each other.  Before I know it, the song is over, and we walk back to the kitchen to grab another drink. 

“Caroline, I’m so glad Crystal got me to come with y’all tonight.  I’m not big on partying, but it looks like I might have to change that thought if we have this much fun!”

“Girl, anytime!  I can tell already that Georgia and us are gonna be tight because we are a lot alike.  Only thing is she’s super quiet.  We are from ‘round here.  Most of the students here are Yankees.  Not that it’s a bad thing.  They just piss me off when they make us seem stupid by the way we talk.  I mean they
chose
to come to school here.”

“I understand you completely!  But aren’t those Yankees too damn cute?  I love me a country boy, but I might have to widen my horizons.”

I’m about to pour myself another round when I hear the sexiest voice known to women.  I look up and there is Jackalope Joe.  If his voice does that to me, I can only imagine what will happen if those perfect lips touch mine.

“Let me get that for you.”

“Thanks,
Joe
? Joe is your name, right?” 
Play dumb Charley.

“Yeah, and you’re Cougar Charley.”  We both laugh.

“You know all I want to call you is Jackalope Joe,” I say with a half smile.

I think I might fall out looking into those make ya wanna melt, piercing blue eyes. 
Keep it together, Charley.
I’ve gotta keep in control. Good lookin’ or not, guys are like a bad habit I can’t break.  The last time I got involved with someone that could make panties drop by just lookin’ at me almost ended my life.  I have to stay in control, no matter what my emotions are screaming at me.

“Miss Cougar, ya wanna try out the dance floor? Joe smirks.  This is not good.

“Sure, see if ya can keep up.”  I smile.
 

Joe leads me to the dance floor and puts his oh so manly hands on my hips.  I immediately think where I want those hands to go.  After several songs, Joe whispers in my ear, “Charley, you’re so beautiful,” as he kisses my neck.

Ah hell, I was right.  Those lips on my neck send a shiver down my spine and warm my insides like nothing I’ve felt before.  Well, maybe that’s not the truth, there has been one other time, but I am not going there tonight.  This has to be the PJ talkin’.

We leave the dance floor and walk outside to the porch.  Joe sits me on top of the railing and pulls me in close.  He looks me dead in the eyes.  Ohmygosh, stick a fork in me, I’m done.  Damn those crystal blue make ya
wanna melt eyes!

Joe pulls me in closer, flashes those pearly whites, and takes my mouth in his.  He kisses me to my core.  I have to pull away, but I can’t; I need him so bad.  We finally come up for air; there is a desire that has ignited between both of us.  I really need to find Caroline and get outta here before I go too far.  Before I can get a word out, he has covered my mouth again, and his hands are reaching for the edge of my top. As soon as his fingers grace my skin, I’m a goner.  My hands are wrapped around his neck and in his oh so messy hair. 

All of a sudden, I hear talking.  Joe and I struggle to separate ourselves.  When we do, I know this is my chance.  I have got to find Caroline and get the hell outta here before I end up naked in Jackalope Joe’s bed.

“Um, Joe.”

“Yeah,” he says with the perfect smile.

“I’ve really had a good time with you, but I think I need to find Caroline.  It’s getting late.”

“Really?  You sure you don’t want to find somewhere a little more private?”

“Um, I shouldn’t.  I’m not usually like this, um, I mean, there’s a lot you don’t know about me.  In fact, if you did, you would probably have a different opinion of me.” 
I can’t believe I just said that aloud.

“I find that very hard to believe, Miss Cougar.  From what I’ve seen, you have everything I like in a girl in one sweet, sexy, Southern package.  I want to get to know you in more ways than one.”

How do I respond to that?  I look into his eyes. Mistake number uno. Before I know it, I’m caught in his strong arms with his eyes staring straight through me.  I can see that he has a desire to be with me, but I have a strange feeling that he wants to know more.  He places his hand on my cheek as he pulls me in close. He kisses me with those oh so soft lips and then pulls away.

“Charley, you are truly beautiful.  I don’t know what you are hiding or scared of, but I want to know you.
All
of you.”  He gives me a quick kiss on my forehead.  “Now, let’s go find Caroline.”

Gawh! My head is swimming above me right now.  I’ve got to stop drinking.  Like he has read my mind, Joe grabs a water. 

We find Caroline hugged up in the corner with some jock.  She sees me and pries away leaving her digits in his hand.  We grab the PJ and tell the Kluft girls bye. Joe walks me to the front porch, kisses me one last time, and Caroline and I walk arm and arm back to Kluft.

I walk into my room. Crystal is MIA, go figure. I put my pj’s on and pass out.