Nil (25 page)

When the air cooled, we foraged. I fished, Charley harvested redfruit, and Jason and Nat gathered firewood. Charley might have been green, but our team purred with island efficiency, enough to dispel the aura of death. Action was always the best Nil antidote, a fact I’d forgotten in the wake of Li’s burial. While Natalie cleaned the fish, I showed Charley how to make fire using my bow. Rub and blow, coaxing the wisp of smoke to burst into flame. The brittle tinder caught within minutes. The blaze was not just for warmth; it was for protection. Animals disliked fire.

As the fire burned and the sun set, I took first watch.

Natalie was already asleep, or lost in thought with her eyes closed. Jason was sacked out beside Nat. Beside the fire, Charley lay in my arms, her back resting against my chest, her face tilted to the clear Nil sky. Even with the crappy day we’d had, I felt guiltily content. I’d buried a girl today, and now I held the perfect one in my arms. It was the yin and yang of Nil, and it was totally twisted.

Charley had been quiet for so long that my gut said she wasn’t thinking about the stars.

“Thinking about Li?” I asked softly.

“I can’t believe she didn’t make it.” Charley’s voice was subdued. “One thing’s for sure, I’ll never look at black rock the same. I hiked all over piles of that stuff my first day here, and for all I know, I was walking over dead bodies. Like a cemetery.” She shuddered.

“Well, I’ve never buried anyone in black rock before, if it makes you feel better.”

“It doesn’t. Because you and I are just the latest drop-ins. Look at the Wall. It’s covered in names. There’re hundreds on there.”

“I know,” I said.

Charley’s face was still tilted toward the stars. “Do you think we’re here for a reason? I mean, on Nil?”

“I don’t know. But”—I kissed her head—“right now there’s no place I’d rather be.”

“Same.” She smiled, then looked straight at me. “Who’s Ramia?”

“Ramia?” I replied, startled.

“Natalie mentioned Ramia, and that name sounds familiar. Who is she?”

“A girl. She left a few weeks after I arrived.”

Charley’s eyes stayed on mine. “She didn’t make it, did she?”

“No.”

“And she’s the one who carved that creepy bone bracelet I heard about?”

“Yup.”

It’s bone
, Ramia had said, her fingers stroking the cuff in an eerie caress.
Bone of an animal that never left
.
Bone of an animal I chose not to eat. Soon it will be bone on bone
. She’d paused, her eyes on the cuff.
I’m not leaving, Thad
.
My journey ends here.
Then she’d looked at me, her eyes shrewd, an odd smile pulling at her lips.
As does yours
.
You’ll Lead, but you’ll never leave. Because you do not see. The blind leading the blind,
she’d cackled
. The blind leading the blind!

Then she’d stopped abruptly, her eyes wide.
Or will you?
she’d crooned, her eyes traveling my face, searching.
If you want to live, you must give up what you want the most
.
Open your eyes, Thad. Will you open your eyes? Will you see?
Rocking, rubbing that creepy cuff, she’d just kept repeating
open your eyes
and mumbling about the blind leading the blind.

You’ll never leave.

I’d never told anyone her prediction for me.
Because it doesn’t matter
, I told myself.
It means nothing
.

But her prediction haunted me. And it changed me; it was the moment I’d decided my mid-season break was over and that I’d do all I could to get the hell off Nil, no matter what some crazy chick predicted. I was leaving.

Until Charley.

Now Nil would have to pry me away.

“Speaking of creepy,” Charley was saying, “did you see Li’s lei? It was made of black rock, like she knew she wouldn’t make it.” Now Charley turned, regarding me thoughtfully. “You used to wear a necklace with a single black rock. But now you wear a shell.” She pointed to my neck, where a smooth shell as gold as Charley’s eyes hung from a piece of twine.

“You’re very observant, Ms. Crowder.” For months, I’d worn black rock, my way of mocking Nil. Black rock, dead rock, spit from Nil’s gut. But the day I’d met Charley, I’d found this shell and ditched the black.

I’d actually found two.

I reached into my pocket and withdrew a necklace. Same twine, different shell. Her shell was gold, too, but flecked with blue, like the ocean was buffering the darkness of Nil. I’d been waiting for the right time to give it to her; maybe that time was now. She could use the buffer.

“I found this shell when I found mine,” I said. “In case you wanted some island bling.”

“It’s beautiful.” Smiling, Charley tied it around her neck before I could help. “Thanks,” she said, one hand touching the shell at her neck. “I love it.”

I love you.

The rush of emotion hit me so hard, the words stuck in my throat.

Unable to speak, barely able to breathe, I twisted my fingers in her hair and pulled her lips to mine. Then, breaking away, I held her tight. No words, no expectations, just Charley in my arms and my eyes wide open.

CHAPTER

34

CHARLEY

DAY 26, LATE MORNING

We were back on black as noon approached. I felt weird because everyone this morning had looked at my charts like they meant something, and for all I knew, they were just chicken scratch. But I wanted them to mean something: I wanted them to mean a gate was coming for Natalie.

“Showtime,” Jason remarked, his eyes dancing across the dark field.

Even without Jason’s warning, I sensed noon was close. It was like the longer I was here, the more I understood the island. Or maybe I just wanted to think I was getting a clue, because so much was unknown. I stopped thinking about all I didn’t know, because my charts were on that list, full of holes. And yet here we were, riding the hope they offered. It was totally stressing me out.

Natalie’s face was anxious, making me forget about me.

I squeezed her hand. “Run fast, sweet friend.” To say good-bye felt so final—plus I was afraid to jinx it. Like if I said good-bye, a gate wouldn’t show.

Trees spread to our right, black stretched before us, and chunky red curved to the left. Everyone’s eyes scoured the ground. The air crackled with waiting, and wanting. The intensity gave me chills, and with a start, I realized everyone was looking south. I shivered.

At the precise moment I noticed the air was slack, Jason shouted.

“There!” he hollered, pointing right. Near the tree line, the ground was rippling, then stretching, into a shimmering wall reaching for the sky. The edges grew dark and defined; the air inside writhed with translucent color and no color at all. No longer rising, now the gate was rolling. North, like we expected.

Natalie was already running. The gate glittered a football field away.

We dropped back, pacing Natalie, giving her space as she chased the gate. She was sixty yards out and sprinting. Thad and I kept quiet while Jason barked directions.

Please make it,
I thought, watching Natalie race against noon.
Please catch this shimmer. Please let this be the last noon you have to see.

Thirty yards to go.

Then, like a bad B movie, two figures darted from the trees. A pair of girls, naked and screaming, running side by side as they streaked—literally—straight for the gate. For Natalie’s gate.

“Not good,” Thad murmured.

“Run, Natalie!” I yelled.

But I knew it was over. She was too far away, with too much competition. The girls’ trajectory would intercept the gate well before Natalie could.

The scene slowed but didn’t. The naked girls flying over the black rock, their four legs like two as they converged on the gate; Natalie on her own, too far behind. Natalie was still a good fifteen yards away when the two girls hit the gate as one.

The air flashed blinding white, like a mirror reflecting the sun. Instinctively, I shielded my eyes, and when I looked back, the gate was gone. The air was clear, unwavering blue; the island breeze was back. One girl lay on the ground, as still as the rocks.

And the other girl was gone.

“Did you see that?” Jason said as the three of us broke into a sprint. “She flew back, like she was shocked.”

“Or repelled,” Thad said, his face hard.

“Have y’all ever seen that before?” I asked.

“Never,” Thad said. “But I’ve never seen two people try to catch the same gate either.”

We caught up with Natalie as she kneeled beside the motionless girl. With practiced ease, Natalie pressed her fingers to the girl’s wrist, checking for a pulse.

“Is she breathing?” Thad asked.

“Barely. I’m not sure what happened to her.”

“Me either, but I think it’s pretty clear that two peeps shouldn’t go for the same gate.” Jason looked at the girl, who looked Indian, or maybe Pakistani. Naked as a jaybird, she was stick-thin. “Man, I never thought I’d say this, but I’m getting sick of naked women.”

“Just when they look like corpses,” Thad said grimly. “But she’s not dead. And we’ve got to help her.” He was already pulling objects from his magic pack.

“Totally.” Natalie covered the girl with her extra wrap. “Even if she did crash my party.” But she didn’t sound upset; she sounded weirdly upbeat, which seemed odd given the circumstances.

“Are you okay?” I asked Natalie. “I mean, that gate. You could’ve made it.”

“Not my gate. And unlike her, I’m totally fine.” She glanced at the girl, worried.

“Still, I’m glad you’re not upset.”

“Upset? I’m not upset, at least not about the gate.” She laughed. “Don’t you see? Your charts work, Charley! A gate was just where you thought it would be!”

Her praise made me uncomfortable. “Natalie, it could’ve been pure luck. Let’s not get too excited, okay?”

“Nope,” she kept grinning. “They work. Because there’s no such thing as luck on Nil.”

CHAPTER

35

THAD

DAY 292, AFTER NOON

Another day on Nil, another round of lugging an unconscious person back to the City.

Looking at the girl on the slapped-together-piece-of-island-crap stretcher, I hoped she fared better than Rory. But I had to admit, it didn’t look good. We’d been walking for hours, and the girl hadn’t opened her eyes or made a sound. At least she was breathing. Taking in her ashen face, I thought,
Whoever you are, please don’t die
. I was sick of death and burials.

Charley walked beside me, her eyes straight ahead. She’d been quiet since Natalie missed the gate. Something had gotten to her; I just didn’t know what.
Nat missing her shot? The girl on the stretcher, the newest Nil contestant? Or Li’s death, haunting us all?

Maybe all of the above, or maybe she just couldn’t fit a word in around Natalie, who wouldn’t shut up. About an hour ago, Natalie had dropped into rapid-fire Nat-speak, babbling about teams and timing, strategies and gate waves. As much as I liked Natalie, right now I wished she’d just stop. She was borderline Nil nutty.

“Nat,” I breathed, “give it a rest, okay?”

“Please,” Jason muttered.

“Okay. Sorry. I’m just really excited about Charley’s charts and the idea of a gate wave. I’ve just never thought about the order and the spacing, or the timing between each gate or sets of gates. It’s like they always come at noon, but I never really thought about the gap between gates that flash in the same place, like the ones at Black Bay, so—”

“Nat,” I broke in, wondering how Nat talked like a machine gun and still managed to breathe, “please.”

“Okay,” she said, “but you gotta admit Charley’s theory is awesome.”

Nat fell silent, and no one filled the gap. Charley’s eyes hugged the ground.

“Crowder,” I said, “you okay?”

“Yeah,” she answered.

No, you’re not
, I thought, reading her face. But now was not the time to press. Not with an audience, not with a girl clinging to life in our hands.

“Hang in there” was all I said. For a second, I wondered exactly who I was talking to. Charley, the girl, me. Or all of us. Then I focused on walking and not dropping the girl. My legs burned, my arms shook, but I refused to take a break.

Near the City, smoke drifted into the night like a beacon. I sent Jason ahead, and as we staggered into camp, Rives came running.

I filled him in on the girl.

“Where’re you gonna put her?” Rives asked.

“With me,” Nat said. “It’ll be tight, but we’ll fit. Or”—now she smiled at Charley—“you could always bunk somewhere else. There’s someone I know who doesn’t have a roommate anymore.” Natalie winked at me, then turned back to Charley, beginning a new round of questions about the charts.

While Natalie monopolized Charley, I slipped into Nat’s A-frame and gently laid the girl on a bed. Nat had one of the smallest houses; I had the other. The bigger A-frames could bunk up to six, but our max was two.

Back outside with Rives, I cut right to the chase.

“We found Li. She didn’t make it.”

“Damn.” Rives blew out a hard breath. “You know, she was the first person I met on Nil. Where was she?”

“The black field, near the tubes. We took care of her. I gave her a coral cross.”

Rives nodded, then glanced toward the Wall. “I’ll carve for her. And I’ll tell Quan.”

“You sure?” I asked.

“Totally.” He looked back, his face set. Dark planes in a black night, touched by Nil’s demons. “You’ve been taking care of us for a long time, bro. Now take care of yourself. You hear?”

I nodded. “Where’s Jason?”

“Crashed out. Said he took second watch last night. I bet he’s already asleep.”

“Good.” I squeezed Rives’s shoulder, then went to find Charley. The City was quiet, like it always was when a large group had left on Search. Charley sat by the fire, alone, watching the flames. She didn’t look up until I stood right beside her.