Nets and Lies (18 page)

“No therapists.” I’d been that route before just after my dad left. There’s nothing to make you feel like a total loser than going to a “kiddie shrink”.

Tami interrupted us by bringing our food. Suddenly, I didn’t have much of an appetite. Mom must of noticed because she said, “Tami, would you be a dear and bring us some to-go boxes? We’re going to have to be leaving soon.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

When she left, Mom looked at me. “You need to eat, JoJo.”

Obediently like a child, I lifted the knife and cut into my steak. After three bites, I glanced up at her. “Satisfied?”

She nodded. She’d only been toying with her food anyway. “If you’re not going to go to therapy, what change are you going to make?”

It was at that moment that something bizarrely divine happened. Something I could have almost blown off if it hadn’t happened before my eyes. Two nuns walked in the door with their arms loaded down with packages. I’d never seen shopping nuns before, but it was all the sign I needed.

“I want to go to school at Saint Catherine’s.”

Mom gasped. “That all girls school?”

“Yes.”

“That Catholic school?”

“
Yes!
” I continued looking at the nuns. One of them caught my eye, and she smiled. I returned her smile. Mom glanced over her shoulder. “Are you trying to tell me you want to become a nun? Because if you are, I’m taking you to the fucking hospital right now!”

I fought not to laugh in her face since her outrage was quite humorous. But I decided I’d better reassure her instead. “No, Mom, I don’t want to become a nun. But I do want to change, and school is part of that. I just think the best thing for me would be to go to an all girls’ school. Away from guys—including teachers.”

Our to-go boxes arrived, and Mom started shoveling her food inside. “Want me to do yours?” she asked, when I still held my fork in midair.

“Aren’t you going to tell me what you think?”

Mom responded by sliding my plate over and dumping it into the box. Then she dug in her purse for her debit card. After she slid it into the leather envelope, she finally looked up at me. She sighed. “Whatever you want to do, JoJo, I’m behind you.”

I smiled. “Really?”

“Of course. For better or worse, I’m your mother. So, if you want to go to school with a bunch of chicks and nuns, then I’m all for it.”

“Thanks Mom.”

And for the first time all week, I actually felt good. I’d had a near death experience, and I wasn’t going to waste it. I was going to change, and I was going to come clean about Coach T.

It was Friday afternoon, and I had a couple of hours to kill until my game. Thinking of it brought a twinge of sadness to my heart. Not only was it the first game without Coach T, but it was also the first one without us doing our ‘Grizzly Den’ layover. Instead of going home before the games, we would hole up in the field house. We’d order in dinner and spend the next few hours eating, laughing, texting, and talking. Coach T loved that we did it. He said it was team building.

Now our team scattered to their own corners. Maybe as team captain I should have done something about keeping the tradition, but I just didn’t have it in me.

So, for the last thirty minutes, I’d reclined on my couch, watching Coach T’s protest rally that I’d TiVoed. I took in every aspect: the size of the crowd, the messages on the signs, the comments from some of the players, parents, and Coach T’s attorney. Of course, I searched for Will each time. He was only shown briefly as the reporter commented that Coach T’s son had also turned out to support him.

Finally, I made myself turn it off. I flipped through the channels until I landed on something to cheer me up. Just as I settled down under my cozy fleece throw, the doorbell rang. I hopped up and padded down the hall. “Who is it?” I asked.

“It’s Will.”

My heard thudded in my chest. With shaking hands, I undid the locks and threw open the door. “Hey,” I said.

“Hey,” he murmured.

We both stood there, staring at each other. Finally, I stepped forward. “Wanna come in?”

He nodded. I held the door open, letting him step inside. Once he stood in the foyer, he held back, shifting nervously on his feet. When I walked back into the living room, he followed me.

I picked up the remote to turn off the TV. “
Mansfield Park
,” he said.

“What?”

He pointed to the TV. “You’re watching
Mansfield Park
.”

“Oh, yeah,” I said, color flooding my face.

A smile tugged at his lips. “You’re such a sap with your romance movies.”

I didn’t say anything. Instead, I motioned for him to have a seat. He moved the blanket and sat down beside me. “Mel, I came over here to tell you I’m sorry.”

My eyes widened in surprise. “You are?”

He nodded. “Yes, I really am. I was so stupid and such a jerk to you.”

I didn’t respond. After all, what could I say? He’d been more than stupid and a jerk. He’d been a mega-sized asshole.

In my hesitation, Will reached over and grabbed my hand. “Will you forgive, Mel? I promise I’ll never be so stupid ever again.”

I stared down at his hand intertwined with mine. “I never thought you’d be that stupid to begin with. So how do I know you aren’t just making promises you won’t keep?”

“But I will! I swear to you I will!” he argued.

His eyes burned into me, but I couldn’t meet his gaze. “You really hurt me. I was just doing what I had to do—what my lawyer and parents said I needed to.”

“I know,” he murmured, his dark head hanging in shame.

“And then you giving me that bullshit ultimatum and not speaking to me yesterday.”I shook my head. “It was like I didn’t even know you anymore.”

Will leaned towards me. “Melanie, all I can say is how very sorry I am. I guess I just snapped when I found out there was some kinda real evidence with Jordan and how you weren’t going to be able to go to the rally. It blinded me, and I’m sorry.” He sighed. “I don’t feel like myself anymore.”

I wanted to tell him I knew how he felt. That being someone else drained me, and I’d give anything to go back to the old me. But I didn’t. Instead, I squeezed his hand. “I’m sorry for what you’re going through, Will. I want to be here for you. I really do.”

He brought his hand to my face. Slowly, his fingertips rubbed across my cheek. “Not being with you—it’s been miserable.”

I closed my eyes. “It has for me, too.”

“Please forgive me. I can’t live without you, Mel,” he murmured, before leaning over to kiss me.

I jerked away before I could stop myself. It was a gut reaction—a true aversion to anything remotely sexual.

Will stared at me with questioning eyes. Stammering, I said, “I-I’m s-sorry. I guess I’m just gun-shy after what happened.” I’d given him yet another lie. I was getting way too good at this.

The truth was I missed his kisses. I missed the way they could make with tingle with longing and feel safe and protected all at once. I knew it was strange to feel this way about him after what happened.

I cupped his face in my hands and stared into his eyes. “I love you so much it hurts,” I whispered.

“I’m sorry I hurt you. I’m so, so sorry. I never want to do anything to hurt you ever again,” he said.

I accepted his apology by bringing my arms around his neck. And for the moment, we were all right.

***

The next night found me lounging around on the couch once again while my parents rushed around getting ready for Luke’s ball game. “Suzanne, have you seen my phone?” Dad shouted upstairs.

“It’s on the table by the door,” I replied.

Dad laughed. “What would I do without you?”

I smiled. “Who knows.”

He grabbed up the phone and slid it in his pocket. Then he looked over at me. “Are you sure you don’t want to come with us to Luke’s game?”

“Nah, I’m tired. I’ll just support him at the next home game.”

Dad smiled. “All right. Call us if you need us.” He went back to the staircase. “Suzanne, we have to go!”

Mom responded by rushing down the stairs in a cloud of Tresor perfume. “Okay, okay, I’m ready,” she panted, clearly out of breath. She was notorious for being late.

“Still not coming?” she asked, throwing on her coat.

“Nope, I gotta hot date with popcorn and a movie.”

Mom forced a smile. I could tell she was concerned by the way I’d been acting lately. Plus, I was never one to not be doing something on Friday and Saturday nights, even after games. “Okay, well, if you’re sure…”

“I am.”

“Then we’ll see you after nine.”

I nodded. “Be careful, and tell Luke to win big!”

After finding nothing on television but reality shows, I picked up my worn copy of
Pride and Prejudice
. Just as I was being swept away by Mr. Darcy, my phone buzzed next to me. It was a text from Will.

Need to talk. Be there in five.

I quickly texted back an
ok
. I didn’t have to wait long for him to knock at the back door. I let him in. “Hey babe, what’s wrong?” I asked.

Will didn’t answer me. He gazed around the kitchen. “Where’s your mom and dad?”

“They’re at Luke’s game—you know the Freshman play away one tonight over in Hamilton.”

“Oh yeah, I forgot.”

He still stood there, swaying back and forth. “Will?” I questioned.

“Let’s go to the living room.”

Without a word, he stalked out of the kitchen. I followed slowly behind him. Before sinking down on the couch, Will slung off his coat and threw it angrily to the floor. I hesitated in the doorway, unsure of what to say or do. When his chest began heaving in silent sobs, I crossed the room to him. “Hey, what’s wrong?” I asked, as I eased down beside him on the couch.

He momentarily stiffened, and I knew he was embarrassed for me to see him crying. But I drew him into my arms and held him. “It’s okay,” I whispered in his ear. “Please tell me what’s wrong.”

I held him for a few moments before he pulled away. He wiped his damp eyes on his sleeve. “Because of all this shit going on, Dad can’t come to Senior Night.”

I gasped in shock. With everything going on, I hadn’t given Senior Night much thought. It was a celebration time where players and their parents were introduced to the fans. Mothers received roses, and then both parents led their child across the court. It was a big production—something you looked forward to.

But the enormity came crashing down on me. Of course Coach T wouldn’t be allowed to come. Because of his arrest, he wasn’t allowed within ten feet of a school yard. So he wouldn’t be able to stand beside his son—his only child—at the last home game of Will’s high school career.

“I’m so sorry,” I murmured, running my hand over his back.

He sighed with exasperation. “Everything is just so fucked up now. Mom’s crying all the time. Dad just mopes around the house, staring at all his trophies and coaching awards. The way people look at me in the hallway…” he shook his head angrily. “And the shit they say about you-”

“It’ll die down,” I argued.