My Libertine (Trio Book 2) (11 page)

“I'm a little particular to Bruce Banner.” We both gape at her.

“Hulk? Seriously? He would crush you.” Linn says.

“But he as a person seems so sweet, and that last movie was so touching.” She says. Interesting. We get giggles from the salon ladies. Have been all day with Linn's antics. She is always the life of the party. This is just what I needed and I think Cris did too, she seems happy today.

“I talked to Dez yesterday.” Cris blurts out later while we are having lunch. I almost choke on my sandwich and smack her upside the head. But decide against it and just hear her out.

“Okay and?” I ask. Linn is unusually quiet when Cris reveals this and I can't help but wonder if she is the reason why.

“He of course apologized. Also told me that the kid wasn't his, dates don't match up I guess.” Still, doesn't change the fact he talked to her like he did. “I just needed closure I guess. We said we're still going to be friends and that if I ever needed anything he would be there for me.”

“Do you love him, Cris?” Linn asks. She takes a moment.

“I do but not in a romantic sense, not the way he feels about me. He was more of a crutch I was using. It’s not fair to him or me for that matter to continue seeing him.” Wow.

“Well, I'm glad you talked to him then,” I tell her wishing I had closure of my own. I still haven't heard from him. I can’t bring myself to delete his number, every once in a while looking at the picture he saved under his contact info. The conversation continues and I get lost in my thoughts of him. Then like a force of nature my eyes drift up to a TV mounted to the wall and I see bull riding being played on the screen. A name being scrolled across the bottom makes my heart speed up, Row Canter, ranked number four. Shit. I try to look closer, getting out of my seat and walking over to the TV. The sound isn't on but I don't need it. I can see him. In the chute getting down onto a bull then blowing out of the chute at a rapid pace. My gut clenches as the bull spins and bucks until finally, he jumps off. No celebration as he did before when I saw him ride the first time. He just walks to the back of the arena. Seconds later he is being interviewed. I watch his lips move remembering how they felt on me. His hair has gotten much longer but his beard is gone now. He has no smile, no emotion. He just had a perfect ride, points outranking everyone for the night and he still has no smile. All cockiness that is Row is gone. They seem to be done talking, he nods and walks off. Somehow taking more of my heart with him through the screen. I turn around to see Linn standing behind me.

“You okay?” she asks with a look so familiar on her face, one of pity. I hate that look, always getting it from her whether it be from a fight with my mom or a stupid boy fucking me over.

“I'm good.” My answer, every time. “You two ready to go, I could really get my drink on now.”

“Sure thing.” She smiles and we walk to Cris paying the bill and leaving to go to the damned bar.

Shots. Many, many shots later. Well probably just four, my tolerance level is down these days. We all decide to be done and call a cab for home. Linn is staying the night. It is going to be a dirty Sunday tomorrow. We haven't had one of those in a while. We go to our rooms to sleep off our drunk state, only I don't go to sleep. Nope, I'm drunk remember? And I have my phone. Taking it out and flopping down onto my bed, I scroll down and find Row’s name. Typing out a text to him.

Shane
: saw you ride on TV today

I lay the phone on my stomach and start to drift off when the chime goes off alerting me to a response.

Row
: how are you?

Shane
: that is one hell of a loaded question. How are you?

Row
: asked you first

Shane
: shit. Your turn

Row
: shit

Shane
: well aren't we a pair

Shane
: you broke my heart you know

Row
: I know

Row
: take care Dove

I roll my eyes. Him and his take care he can shove it. I'm pissed now, and drunk and pissed is really not a good combo for me.

Shane
: yep you too. be sure to not get any STD’s while you are out there bed hopping

I toss the phone to the side table and drift off to sleep. Jerk. I hate boys, stupid boys.

I wake the next morning with a damned hangover from hell, knowing that I did something stupid last night but can't put my finger on what. Well until I look at my phone and see the texts between Row and I. Oh no no no. Part of me wants to apologize and blame it on the alcohol, but I decide not to. Just let it be. My head hurts too much to be remorseful.

Getting out of bed I go to the kitchen and promptly get a glass of water filling it twice more after downing it.

“Dirty Sunday?” Cris says mid yawn coming from her room.

“Oh yes please.” I go join Cris on the couch while she flips on the TV.

“Who was watching this?” shacks referring to The Walking Dead. I see they have new episodes and now I want to start watching them.

“Oh, I was.”

“You hate scary movies.”

“Well it's not all that scary, it is more about the people surviving than it is about zombies. Kinda good. You should watch it.” I say. She shrugs and says okay, clicking on the show.

“What are we watching?” Linn says mid yawn coming from her old room.

“Shane has been binge watching zombies,” Cris says before I can answer.

“Well, that's random. You guys want bloodies?” she asks going for the kitchen. I press pause and get up to go help her.

“Since I knew we were going out I stocked up.” Going to the freezer I grab the vodka then open the fridge and pull out the clamato and pickles. We have tall glasses just for this occasion. They don't have our names on it or anything but are color coated. Linn has blue Cris has red and I have green. We got them at the dollar store. Big spenders we are. I fill up the glasses with ice and Cris gets the celery salt from the cupboard.

“I drunk text him last night,” I say while filling the glasses with a shot of vodka each.

“What did you say?” Linn asks. I continue my task keeping my hands occupied.

“I told him I felt like shit and to not get any STD’s.” Chris gasps and Linn laughs.

“You are so mean Shane,” Cris says. I shrug.

“I know, but me with alcohol and anger really isn't a good combo. I tend to get mouthy.” The drinks are ready. I grab mine and go back to my spot on the couch. “I'm not moving from this spot until tomorrow,” I state after I sit down, cuddling into my blanket.

“Me either.” Both of them say mimicking my actions.

An hour later we hear the door open and in walks, Lee carrying take out bags from our favorite Chinese place.

“Got your text screamer.” I used to cringe whenever he called her that, to weird. Linn looks over at the door not even moving from her spot.

“Oh good! Put it on the table in front of us. Close so we don't have to reach very far.” She sounds whiny but he just laughs, doing as she says. Then he goes around the back of the couch to whisper something in her ear. Whatever it is must be good because she is grinning from ear to ear and bright red. “Um, I will be right back, got to go pee.” She says and hops up like she doesn't have one hell of a hangover. We hear a door shut but it sounds closer than the bathroom one.

“Horny bastards,” I mumble and turn up the volume on the TV to drown out Linn’s moans. She is really fricken loud.

“I wonder what that is like,” Cris says. I think she is talking about the show we are watching but when I look over she isn't even looking at the TV.

“What what is like?”

“Love, needing someone right in that moment, and taking them.”

“Don't know.” Is all I can say. Really I have no answer, it’s not something I have experienced at all. I thought I was in love with Lee but I realized that was just a first time thing. Not something real.

“Would like to experience it someday. Whether it turns out good or bad. Mom always told me that boys were just mean.” She sighs. “We found that out to be true didn't we?” she looks over to me and I nod.

“We did. Only one I need in my life is Karter. That is the love I want to have.”

“You are a great mom Shane, I hope you know that. He is the luckiest little guy in the world.”

“Thank you, Cris. That means a lot to me.” I reach over and hug her. “You are going to find someone that you love and loves you in return. I know there is someone out there for you.” She smiles then leans forward rifling through the bags of takeout settling on a carton then grabs some plastic wear.

“You will too. Eat. We need food back in our systems.” We sit there on the couch and binge watch the whole season. Moaning in pain every time we move. It is probably the best day I have had in a long time.

“How is the dating life sweetheart?” oh no.

“Dad, not now,” I say during our lunch at our regular place.

“Who was that guy that moved in with you a few months ago?”

“How did you know about that?” I ask dumbfounded he even knew.

“Your mother.” Is all he has to say. I remember the day Row defended me to her and smile a little.

“You talk to her?”

“She calls whining every now and then. I just tell her to be a better person and maybe you will talk to her again, is all.” At least someone is. “She said he told her off. I instantly liked the guy when she said that. So who is he?”

“Just a friend I once had. Don't talk to him anymore.”

“too bad.” We eat quietly for a while until he breaks the silence. “Are you happy Shana?” he asks catching me off guard.

“I'm happy dad. I have a wonderful son, there is nothing else that matters.” I smile. It is true nothing else does really matter but I do feel empty in some areas in my life. The main one being missing Row. Not even when he was here just talking to him was great. I liked our friendly banter, his bluntness. The way he made me feel. Dad seems to accept my answer with a little reluctance but does in the end.

“I'm asking Leanna to marry me. What do you think?” I'm shocked for a moment then I finally find my words.

“That is great dad!” I’m really excited to hear this. “Not to be mean or anything but , please don't ask me to be in the wedding in any way, really not my thing.” He laughs at me.

“Of course not, I know how you feel about that kind of stuff. Wouldn't put you through that sweetheart.” I love that he gets me.

“Thank you so much. This is exciting! When are you to going to do it?”

“Was thinking of maybe next month. Courthouse something small, if you wouldn't mind being a witness?”

“Of course, I will dad.” He is getting his happy ending and I couldn’t be happier for him. So why is it that when I get up to hug my dad all I can think about is Row and what his happy ending will be like?

I'm pulling up to my parking space when I see a familiar black truck with Texas license plates. A cold shiver runs throughout my body. He’s here. Trying to calm my nerves before getting out I see he must have been waiting for me because his door opens too. Then there he is standing before me, tall sexiness and all. He looks tired. But when our eyes lock from only feet away something instantly changes in his face. I feel it too. He rushes over to me, no words needed, and wraps his arms around me slamming his lips to mine. Just like that, the past few months are gone. The night he left. Gone. His words. Gone. I melt into him wrapping my arms around him too. Then suddenly he picks me up wrapping my legs around him and carries me to the front door of the apartments. I don't even notice him opening the door we are kissing so frantically, not even coming up for air until he gets to my door and breathes out “keys” I fumble around to find my keys and really don't even know how I got the door open before we are inside. Then he is carting me off to my room pushing us down onto the bed. Hands, mouths, lips. Kissing, so much kissing.