My Body-His Marcello (4 page)

Other than
Janice’s intrusion at the beginning of the reception and the fact
that I had to prance around nude, the wedding turned out
wonderfully. That is, until I no longer could avoid dancing with
Marcello. His strong lead felt like steel compared to Luke’s. I
didn’t mind being led, but his considerable, hard cock pressed up
against me left me feeling exceedingly uncomfortable.

“
I
can’t wait until later,” he said after our dance ended.

“
Later?” I said. “I don’t think so.” I pulled myself free from
his grip and furrowed my brow.

“
You
might want to watch how you speak to me,” Marcello said. He looked
directly into my eyes as if he could will my obedience.

“
I
think you’ve mistaken who you’re speaking to,” I said, and went in
search of Luke.

I pulled him away
from a conversation with his friend Jim and said, “What does
Marcello think is going to happen later? He’s an extremely rude man
and very disrespectful of you, I might add.”

Luke laughed. “Of
me? I don’t think so.”

“
He
kept rubbing his cock against me the whole time we danced and then
he tried to talk to me as if he were you. That is disrespect, if
you ask me.”

“
Well
Marcello certainly has his ways and it might serve you well to be
nicer to him.”

“
Nicer
to him? You must be joking.”

“
I’m
not.”

I stood there
with my mouth open. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “What
about protecting me? Wasn’t that part of your vows?”

“
When
you require my protection, you will have it. Until then, be
reverential of my friends and acquaintances.”

“
I’m
going for a stroll,” I said, taking a step toward the
beach.

Luke clutched my
hand and pulled me back toward him. “Jane, you still need to throw
the bouquet.”

I flounced off
toward Parker’s table to retrieve my flowers as Luke summoned all
the single women. I hoped Sandy would catch the bouquet. It would
make her happy, and perhaps she could leave my wedding with one
positive memory. As the women gathered behind me, I glanced over my
shoulder and I noticed where Sandy stood. I also noted that
Marcello loitered off to the side, staring me down.

Luke moseyed up
to me and said, “Go for it.” With a wink he added, “She’s shifted
over to the left a bit.”

I threw the gold
roses over my left shoulder, knowing they would fly straight to
Sandy. I spun around in time to see Marcello stretch out his long
arm and snatch them from the air right above Sandy’s
head.

What the hell
is doing?
I thought. I looked over at Luke, who grunted and
started to laugh.
How could he?

All the women
returned to their seats as I stormed over to Marcello.

“
What
was
that
?” I said, hands on my hips.

“
I
caught them for you?” he countered, a look of the devil in his
eyes. He said it almost like a question.

“
They
were meant for Sandy! What is your prob—” I started to say,
pointing at Marcello, but then Luke grabbed my wrist and whirled me
about to face him.

“
Jane,
we just spoke about this,” he whispered harshly in my ear, pinning
my arm to my side. “You will not disrespect my friends. Know you
owe me for ...”

I wrenched my
wrist free and ran toward the beach without looking back. Although
the sun had gone down, the houses on the coast cast enough light
for me to find my way. I tightened my robe as I headed north, close
to the shore, keeping my feet out of the water. Finally I found a
lounge chair and sat down to watch the waves come in.

There seemed to
be no middle ground for me. One minute I felt elated and happy,
even blissful, and yet in a matter of seconds I could sink to such
depths of despair. Why had I chosen this life—this path of
extremes?

In the days to
come, I would ask myself that same question over and
over.

Alone on the
beach, I wondered if I had made a huge mistake. After a while I lay
back and watched the moonlit clouds shift and change shape. I must
have dozed for a bit because the sound of my name being called
brought me back to the waking world. I looked around to get my
bearings.

“
Jane?”

“
Yes,”
I said, sitting up. I couldn’t make out the person standing there
in the dark.

“
People are looking for you,” she said as she
approached.

Janice.

“
Oh.
Okay.” I stood up and followed her.

“
Are
you okay?” she asked. Her voice held so much compassion that I
wondered what could have possibly gone wrong between her and Luke.
Her beauty was intimidating—from her jet black hair that shone blue
in the light, her deep onyx eyes, to her stunning proportions.
Although she was close to my height, her body, shown to the best
advantage in the corset and jeans, was far more curvaceous than
mine.

“
He
asks too much of me sometimes.”

She put her hands
on my shoulders. “The only way you’ll survive this relationship
with your mind intact is if you truly give your body over to Luke
and to a large extent, your life. If not, you’ll be at war with
yourself the whole time and not be able to live with him or without
him. Take my word for it.”

I knew she was
giving me the advice I needed to hear but it’s a whole other thing
to actually take it.

“
I
wanted to hate you,” Janice said. “You, who have stepped right into
my shoes, but instead I see you as his next conquest. You seem far
more innocent than I was in the beginning. I’m worried for
you.”

“
For
me?” I asked. “I think it’s a mistake to confuse your situation
with mine. I’m wondering if
you’ll
be okay.”

We both began
making our way toward the house and she said, “There’s no going
back. You might want to remember that, too.”

Her words sent a
chill jetting through me. My body felt their truth even if my mind
refused it.

I trod in her
footsteps back to the house, trying to hang onto the hate I’d
initially felt for her. But as I watched her sashaying barefoot
through the sand in front of me, I thawed. Luke had never asked her
to marry him and just because Janice still longed for him didn’t
mean he still wanted her. My thoughts were in turmoil as I climbed
the stairs to the back of our new beach home.

Most of the
guests had left but my mother, Parker, and Marcello remained. It
was an odd group. They sat at one table together but none of them
spoke. I didn’t see Luke but could see the caterers cleaning up
inside.

“
Damn
girl, you had us all worried,” Parker said.

“
Sorry. I went for a walk and I guess I dozed for a bit.” I sat
down at the table, avoiding eye contact with either my mother or
Marcello. “Where’s Luke?”

“
He
went looking for you in the other direction,” Janice
said.

“
Oh,
then I should ...” I began but Luke climbed up the steps toward us.
He didn’t seem pleased.

“
Jane,” he said as he approached. “Come with me.”

“
Let
me say my goodbyes first,” Parker said.

“
Of
course,” Luke said.

I strode with
Parker to the front of the house and my mother followed a few steps
behind.

“
Be
strong and don’t take any shit from him.”

I laughed so hard
at Parker’s advice. If she had only known, she would’ve kidnapped
me right then and there.

“
I’m
serious, Jane.”

“
I
know, Parker. It’s what I love so much about you. I will take care
of myself. Thank you again for all your support. I wouldn’t have
made it through without you and I know I owe you big
time.”

She hugged me and
said, “That’s what friends are for. Call me if you need me.
Anytime
, Jane. Do you hear me?”

“
Yes.
I love you, Parker.”

“
I
love you, too.”

I watched her
depart and then shuffled over to my mother’s car, where she sat
waiting for me.

“
Mom,”
I said as I tapped lightly on her window.

“
Jane,
I promised Luke I would not ruin your wedding, but seeing that it’s
over, I will no longer hold my tongue.”

I went around and
got in on the passenger’s side.

“
Get
an annulment. Come stay at my house until you can get a new job and
a place to live. This is not the place for you. I know you can’t
see it for yourself and you see me as always being critical of you
and maybe in a way I have been but this is different. Jane please,
I’m worried for you. I don’t think Luke is who he appears to be and
I’m truly afraid for you.”

I didn’t respond
right away. I thought it had to be the most sincere thing my mother
had ever said to me. Tears pooled in my eyes and I struggled to
keep my emotions in check. I knew I had to reassure her but I was
at a loss.

We sat in
silence. A tear escaped down my cheek.

“
Mom,
I so appreciate you coming to the wedding, especially considering
the circumstances. I also value your concerns for me. I want to
assure you that I can take care of myself. I knew what I was
getting into, marrying Luke. I love him, Mom, and he loves
me.”

“
Not
all love is good love, Jane,” she said, placing her
palm
on my knee.

I looked down at
her hand. I couldn’t remember the last time she had initiated
physical contact. “I can’t thank you enough for offering your
place. It’s good to know I have somewhere to go if I need it.” But
even as I said it, I knew I would never live in my mother’s house
again. I questioned the wisdom of marrying and living with Luke,
but I knew I wouldn’t survive living in the same house with her.
“It will all be fine,” I said.

“
Please keep in touch,” she said.

“
I
will.” And at that moment, I meant it.

I went back
through the living room to the French doors and signaled to Luke.
Marcello and Janice still remained. He didn’t say anything but took
my hand and led me back to the bedroom.

“
I was
worried,” Luke said, rotating me to face him.

“
I
dozed off. I didn’t mean to,” I said with a shrug and a
sigh.

He gazed down at
me and shook his head. “All those people wanted to say goodbye but
you weren’t here.”

“
I’m
sorry. I don’t know what else to say.” I felt nervous but my anger
goaded me on. “I had to get away. It was clear to me that your
loyalty is not with me. You are more loyal to Marcello and Janice.
Maybe this was all a mistake. My mother certainly thinks so.” I
couldn’t look directly at him. Was the expression on his face anger
or concern?

“
What
do
you
think? That’s all that matters here,” he asked. He
tilted my chin up so I had to confront him.

“
I
think what you call having control over my body is just an excuse
to treat me badly, an excuse to not consider or respect me. Janice
says I just need to give myself over to you, but if that’s really
what you want, then why pick me? Maybe you should have picked
her.”

“
Maybe
I should have, but I didn’t. I chose you. You’re the one I want to
spend my life with.”

I took a step
back, but Luke did not relinquish his hold on my shoulders. “Then
stop putting other people before me. Stop making Marcello’s
opinions and feelings more important than mine. I happen to think
Janice is okay but your inviting her to our wedding was completely
inconsiderate. Myopic? I think, very much so.”

He released my
shoulders and cocked his head, as though contemplating his choices.
As he clasped my hands in his, I could feel his energy.

“
I had
plans for us tonight that I have to rethink,” he said. A smile
played at his mouth and I felt relief. “Marcello won’t be happy but
I’ll postpone it until the morning. I think you and I need to spend
some time alone and I know I have some ground to make up with you.
I wanted today to be perfect, and I failed.”

“
Not
completely,” I said. I leaned over, kissing his breath into me. He
seemed to finally hear me, finally get who I was, and I felt
reassured. “I need to shower and get all the gold off
me.”

“
Give
me a minute. I’ll tip the caterers and say our goodbyes to Janice
and Marcello.”

“
I’ll
wait here,” I said. After removing all the adornments from my body,
I lay back on the bed.

Something caught
my eye and I twisted toward the doorway. To the left hung a new
painting. I sat up and scooted to the other side of the bed to get
a closer look. There I saw the
canvas
that he’d worked on the night of the party
when we first met. I could see clearly now that I was the girl
sitting in the gazebo. The uncanny resemblance left me spooked. Had
he already painted me there or had he altered the original? At that
moment I felt that he had manifested me into his life with some
sort of magic.