Mother’s Only Child (46 page)

Deirdre was glad she had come for a look and could see the draw for boys—once over the mound it was a grand place to build dens and all—but she knew she wouldn’t be a regular visitor. Now she was this far, though, she did want to look in the quarry. She cautiously approached the edge of it and looked down into that deep, deep pit.

‘How did they get down?’ she asked.

‘Same way we do, I suppose,’ Paul said nonchalantly.

‘You never go down there?’ Deirdre asked, appalled.

‘Course we do,’ Paul said, pointing. ‘Look you can see where the clay has been cut to make steps that go all the way down. It’s quite safe. We go down on our bottoms. I’ll take you, if you like.’

‘But, the quicksand…‘

‘Oh, we keep well away from that,’ Paul said, pointing again. ‘See, that’s the quicksand there. It’s a deeper orangey colour.’

The thought of it made Deirdre shiver. ‘There’s an awful lot of it.’

‘A fair bit,’ Paul admitted. ‘Like I say, we keep well away and hang about on the other side. Do you want to go down?’

Deirdre didn’t know if she would have gone or not, for at that moment a man came out of his house, shouting at them and shaking his fist.

‘Come on.’ Paul said, catching her hand. ‘This lot aren’t above calling the police.’ And they hurried out of the place, leaping over the piles of debris. Deirdre had never been back.

But now that was where Barney was taking Patsy and she was going to follow him and find out exactly what he intended to do with her, though her insides trembled with fear.

When Patsy had stopped Barney’s balled fist hitting Deirdre, he had given a malicious smile as he watched the frightened little figure fleeing and then said to Patsy. ‘Let the little shit go, for now. Anyway, you and I have some unfinished business.’

‘I don’t think so,’ Patsy said coldly.

‘Oh, yes we do,’ Barney said. ‘For nearly a year you teased and tormented me, promising me everything and giving me bugger all. And me, like a bloody fool, put up with it. I told myself that you were young, but now you are no longer young and it is pay-back time.’

‘No.’

‘No? What do you mean, no?’ Barney said, a sadistic smile playing around his lips. ‘I am not asking you.’ ‘I’ll scream if you touch me.’

The punch took Patsy completely be surprise. She staggered under the power of it and before she could recover herself, one arm was clasped tightly around her mouth. With the other arm encircling her, Barney began dragging her down the road.

Patsy’s heart was pounding against her ribs, her mind
full of fear. She was unaware of the stealthy footsteps behind them, but Barney heard them and knew who they belonged to because in the glare of the streetlight he had spotted Deirdre peeping out from Grange Road. Let her follow, he thought savagely. It’ll be her turn soon. That was the only way he knew to take revenge on Sean. But for now he intended to teach the teasing and tormenting Patsy a lesson she wouldn’t forget in a hurry.

As they neared the brickworks, Deirdre felt her stomach tighten in dread. However unnerving the brickworks were in daylight, she knew they would be twenty times worse in the dark. The darkness did mean, though, that Deirdre could follow Barney and Patsy through the fence. She got as close to them as she could, and ducked down behind a pile of bricks.

She saw Barney hurl Patsy savagely to the ground and she knew how uncomfortable Patsy would be, lying amongst all that rubble. Patsy, though, was barely aware of the bricks digging into her back, or the slime she lay on, for she was petrified by fear. This man intended, at the very least, to violate her and there was little she could do about it.

Even knowing it was futile, through her tears she pleaded with him. ‘Please don’t do this, Barney. Please let me go now. Please, please,’ she begged, clawing at his arm. ‘I’ll not say a word about it, not to anyone.’

Barney shook her off as if she was a troublesome fly, and continued pulling her clothes off. ‘Shut up you little bitch,’ he snarled. ‘You’re a prick teaser. D’you know that? I’ve waited long enough for you and you might even enjoy it if you let yourself.’ With that, he threw himself on top of her.

Oh God! Deirdre knew now what they were doing. Her and Sally had discovered a couple doing the same thing in Pype Hayes Park just the previous summer when they were looking for a good place to hide in a game of hide and seek. They’d been so scared then and had run home without stopping, never giving a thought to the children who might be seeking them. They had told no one what they had seen. So she knew Barney was…oh, God, it was disgusting.

She heard Patsy give a sudden shriek and then begin to cry. Deirdre felt sick and knew that she shouldn’t be watching this, but she couldn’t seem to tear her eyes away from the man powering into Patsy with pig-like grunting noises, while Patsy herself sobbed in anguish, despair and shame.

And then it was over. Barney gave an exultant cry and was still, but continued to lie on top of Patsy as he said, ‘That was bleeding marvellous. I didn’t know you were a fucking virgin. Jesus, it’s a long time since I’ve had one of those.’

Patsy felt sick to the core of her. Everywhere hurt and she knew she’d be a mass of bruises, but the greatest pain by far was the throbbing one between her legs where she could feel stickiness. Her innards felt as if they were on fire.

Deirdre couldn’t take any more. She got to her feet, too disturbed to be cautious, and stumbled over a pile of bricks she hadn’t noticed were there. Barney jumped to his feet and peered into the darkness. At first, he saw nothing, but he heard vague scrabbling noises. And then Deirdre reached the road and Barney caught a glimpse of her running up Holly Lane, illuminated
for a second by a streetlamp. He smiled. He would definitely deal with her later.

Patsy took the opportunity to sit up and begin replacing her discarded clothes, hard enough in the dark. She felt dirty, degraded and mortified by shame for what she had allowed this brute of a man to do to her, and would hate for anyone to think she had gone with him willingly. So, struggling to her feet, she asked in a scared and shaky voice, ‘What was it? Did you hear something?’

‘Thought I did,’ Barney said. ‘But it was just a couple of cats.’ He heard Patsy sigh in relief. ‘Right then, I’m off,’ he said. ‘You all right?’

‘Course I’m not all right,’ Patsy snapped. ‘I’ll never be all right again, you bloody moronic pervert.’

Barney laughed. ‘Don’t be so sodding dramatic,’ he told her scornfully. ‘You’ll get over it, and I don’t have to say that, if you know what’s good for you, it had better remain our secret?’

No he didn’t. Patsy knew she would keep quiet, not because of what Barney would do to her if she told, but because of the consequences to others if she let on. Sean would seek him out and kill him. Last time he said Andrew had saved him from the gallows; this time there would be no man living who could stop him. He would kill Barney and hang for it. This time Andrew might not want to stop him—in fact he might want to help him if he had heard what Barney had done.

How could she risk losing the two men she loved most in all the world because of Barney McPhearson? She couldn’t, and so she would say nothing. But she still felt immense sorrow and regret for Andrew who’d
had his right to be her first lover snatched from him, and she didn’t know yet if she could look him in the face, let alone marry him. She felt soiled, defiled.

She sank to her knees, put her hands over her eyes and began to sob as the enormity of what had happened that bleak December evening hit her.

The next thing she was aware of was Deirdre’s arms around her shoulders. Deirdre hadn’t run far up Holly Lane because she hadn’t known if that was all Barney was going to do to Patsy. She had secreted herself behind a hedge in a garden opposite the brickworks and waited. A few minutes later, she saw Barney stride down past her towards his house. She had crept back and found Patsy on her knees, crying as if her heart was broken.

‘Don’t, Patsy. Please don’t,’ Deirdre begged. ‘Let’s go home. When Daddy comes home from the match, we’ll tell him and—’

‘No,’ Patsy said, jerked into awareness. ‘Dad must never know about this, Deirdre. Promise me now.’

‘But why?’ All Deirdre’s young life she had been convinced nothing bad would ever happen to her because her father would see that it wouldn’t, and would be there to fix anything always.

Oh God, how Patsy hated to tell all to Deirdre. She was so young. But if she was to let something slip…Patsy couldn’t risk it. There was too much at stake.

‘Listen,’ she said. ‘You don’t know all this and normally you wouldn’t have to know either, but this is so important. Maria isn’t in hospital just because of the baby, as we told all of you. The truth is that Barney beat her up so severely that she was extremely ill and really could have died. Dad went looking for Barney
that night and it was only Andrew that stopped him killing the man. If Barney had pressed charges, then Dad would have got into trouble, but Barney didn’t, probably because of what he had done to Maria. But if I was to tell Dad about this, well, I wouldn’t like to think what he would do, or what Andrew might do to Barney because of it. We might want Barney out of the way permanently—I know I do—but if Dad or Andrew had any hand in putting him in that position then they could hang.’

It was too dark to see Deirdre’s face, but Patsy heard the sharp intake of breath and could feel the shock waves running through her. She regretted the fact that she had had to tell a child such sordid things, but she needed her to realise how important it was that she said nothing.

‘And now,’ said Patsy, getting to her feet, ‘if we are to keep this secret, as we must, we have to get home quickly, before everyone is back and sees the state of me.’

She took hold of her sister’s hand and they began to pick their way over the rubble.

Fortunately, no one had returned home before them, though when Patsy glanced at the clock she knew that Sean and the boys could be in any time. She ran a bath and it wasn’t until she’d reached the bathroom that she had the chance to look at herself properly. The face that looked back at her, with eyes that were panicriddled, was pasty white and furrowed with strain lines, one cheek and the side of her nose already sporting a nice bruise she would have to hide with make up.
As for her clothes, her winter coat was ripped and filthy and she doubted it would ever recover. Her jumper and skirt too were ruined, and her stockings were in tatters.

As she pulled off the soiled and torn clothes to give them to Deirdre to hide at the bottom of her wardrobe, the young girl caught sight of Patsy’s bruised back. Scratches and gashes ran from between her shoulder blades to her buttocks, and there was dried blood at the top of her scratched and discoloured legs.

She felt so sorry for Patsy, but she knew nothing she could say would make any difference. She took the offending clothes away and hid them well before sorting out clean things for her.

Patsy didn’t think she would ever get the stink of Barney out of her nostrils, and she scrubbed at her body ruthlessly as the tears flowed once more. She wondered if she would ever feel really clean again. In the end, Deirdre took hold of her hands. ‘Enough now, Patsy,’ she said. ‘Let me bathe your back with the flannel.’

Patsy nodded. Gentle as Deirdre was, she couldn’t help wincing. When Patsy eventually heaved herself from the water, Deirdre dried her back, patting it delicately with a soft towel before rubbing salve on. ‘Does it feel any easier at all?’ she asked.

Patsy sighed and wiped her eyes. There were to be no more tears, she decided, for they were no earthly use. ‘If I’m honest, not a lot,’ she said, struggling to dress. ‘Everything aches and throbs and stings, and my back feels as if it is stiffening up.’

‘It’s not fair that Barney should get away scot-free
with what he did to you,’ Deirdre said. Then, as Patsy went to speak, she said. ‘I know we can’t say anything and I shan’t, but it
isn’t
fair, is it?’

Patsy shook her head. ‘No, Deirdre, it’s anything but fair.’ And she put her arms around her young sister.

‘Where do you think he is now?’ Deirdre asked with a shudder.

‘I asked Sean where he would go when he came out of the hospital and he said into some hostel place near the centre of town, because he isn’t allowed to go home.’

‘So what was he doing out here?’

‘Well, there are buses, and I don’t suppose they are kept prisoner.’

‘Pity they aren’t.’

‘I agree,’ Patsy said. ‘And while it is good to talk sometimes, rehashing it all now is just stirring up bad memories, so I am going to try to put it out of my mind and I think you should do the same.’

‘I’ll try,’ Deirdre promised.

However, another worry was pressing on Patsy’s mind and not one that she thought she could share with Deirdre—or anyone else, for that matter. What if that disgusting pervert had made her pregnant? She wouldn’t be able to keep that secret for long, and how would Andrew react to know that she was pregnant with another man’s child?

Patsy knew she wouldn’t rest easy until she’d had her period.

Both Patsy and Deirdre would have been even more worried if they had known that Barney was just down the road from them, at the house in Westmead Crescent.

He didn’t walk boldly up to the door. He knew about the injunction thing that Maria was supposed to have, and he didn’t want any of the neighbours sending for the police before he had a chance to make Maria see that the whole thing was crazy. She had trapped him into a marriage, but he had stood by her in all good faith. Before the priest and more than half the village she had married him for better or worse, richer or poorer, and had also promised to obey him, so what the hell was she playing at? He’d soon make her see how ludicrous the whole thing was. He’d rip that bloody injunction into a million pieces, just see if he didn’t.

But first he had to get into the house undetected and he knew full well how to do that. Behind the houses in Westmead Crescent there was a social club and a sports field. The entrance was just round the corner in Woodacre Road. There was a fence surrounding it, but many of the posts had been bent, over the years, to provide access when the gates were closed. That evening, however, the gates stood open and Barney went through them, skirting the clubhouse where he could hear the sound of merriment and loud voices.