Authors: Jay McLean
Then we both froze abruptly, because I was
hard
, and she could feel it.
"Get dressed, climb out the window, and then knock on the front door."
Then she was off me and walking out of the room.
Climb out the fucking window? What am I? Fourteen?
I did it anyway, because like I said; my balls
—
her pockets.
Ten minutes later we were all seated and having breakfast.
"I gotta go buy some shit today, you guys need anything?" I asked.
"What kind of shit?" Ethan said with a mouth full of cereal.
I tried to make a list in my head. "Everything. I guess I need all the furniture for my room, bathroom stuff. I need to buy a new computer and stereo system. Shit...everything."
"It is true!" Ethan barked out. "One of my boys told me your room at the house got trashed. He said a bunch of guys went there and did some damage. You screwed the wrong guy’s sister one too many times or something?"
Amanda's eyes bugged out as she choked on her food. She got up and made her way to the sink.
Ethan eyed her like she was crazy. "Anyway," he continued, "you should take Dimmy with you, she loves shopping for that kind of stuff. She has an eye for it, you know?" Then he looked over at her. "Oh hey, maybe Luca will be working at the Apple store. He's been asking about you again. Just put the kid out of his misery and go out with him already." He got up and washed his bowl. "I'm out, I'll see you guys tonight."
***
She was wiping down the counter, when I approached her. "So, can you come with me today? I mean, if you don't have plans. I could really use the help." I hoped to God she said yes. I'd do whatever she wanted if it meant that I could spend the day with her.
She turned around and faces me. "Two truths for fifteen time?"
I smiled at her. She remembered. I nodded my head and jumped up on the counter, waiting for her question.
"Is it true? They trashed your room because you couldn't keep your dick in your pants?"
I shrugged. "I guess. I didn't really hang around to find out." I hated that she knew that.
I waited for more, but she didn't say anything else. So it was my turn, "Where were you last year? I looked around for you but I
—
"
She interrupted before I could finish, "I had to stay home. Well, one of us had to, so I did."
She started to walk away but I held her back with a grip on her arm. "It's called two truths for
fifteen.
We need to talk about it for fifteen minutes, remember?"
She nodded, and inhaled deeply, "Some shit went down at home. I guess Mom found out Dad had been cheating on her since, well, forever." She shrugged like it was no big deal. "Mom
—
she kind of lost it. Got into drinking,
heavily
. She lost her job, her car, nearly the house. Dad took everything worth anything and just bailed with his latest mistress. He hasn't looked back. So it was tough times. I stayed and worked full time, studied at the community college when I could. Helped Mom with whatever she needed."
"And Ethan?"
"Ethan got to go to college. I'm only a semester behind in classes. Hopefully I'll be able to make it up and graduate the same time."
"Still childcare?"
"Yup."
"Still want to be a midwife though?"
She looked at me now, like she was trying to work something out. "You remember?"
"I haven't forgotten a single thing about you, Amanda."
She cleared her throat and looked away. "Yeah, still want to be a midwife. But still afraid of blood. So yeah...there's that."
It was silent for a few moments.
"And your dad?" I asked. "What's the deal with him?"
She lifted her shoulders again. "Like I said, he bailed. Don't know where he is. He hasn't bothered to call so really
—
why should I give a shit?"
She tried her hardest to act like none of this bothered her, but it did. I could see the way her eyes started filling with tears. The way her voice started to crack. The way she purposely avoided my eyes.
I held her hand in mine and made sure she was looking at me. "Anyone that purposely chooses to not have contact with you is an asshole, Amanda."
She laughed a bitter laugh, and jerked her hand out of mine. "I should introduce you two. You'd get along well. You being the pot, him being the kettle, guess you're both black," she said, before walking away.
***
A while later we were both back in the living room, showered and dressed for the day. She was wearing denim cut-offs that show off her legs. I don't know how the fuck she had legs like that for someone that apparently hated working out.
She silently walked around the house, gathering her shit, then turned to me as she opened the front door. "I'll see you later," she said, her hand gesturing a small wave.
I cleared my throat and pulled my eyes away from her legs. Then I remembered she has no car. "Uh, what
—
what are you doing? You need a ride?"
"Nope. I'll catch the bus. See ya!" she said too quickly, shutting the front door behind her.
I ran out and stopped her half way down the driveway.
"Okay, something's definitely wrong. What's up?"
She was still avoiding my eyes.
I grabbed her chin in my hands, my fingers on one cheek, and my thumb on the other. I made her look up at me, and then I squeezed, squishing her face together, so she had fish lips.
I laughed.
She scrunches her nose. "Let go," she said. Her words muffled by the shape of her mouth.
"You look so hot right now." I chuckled. "I think I might kiss you." I move my lips down to hers, but in the corner of my eye, I saw her knee rise.
I was quicker this time, pulling back and blocking my junk at the same time.
"See that!" I pointed to her. "I learnt ninja reflexes after the last time you pulled that shit on me."
She pushed at my chest. "Maybe if you quit fucking kissing me; I'd stop kneeing you in your junk!"
She was smiling.
And it's all I ever wanted.
Logan
After I got the stuff I needed to replace what the assholes broke, I drove her around so she could do whatever she needed to do. We were sitting next to each other; waiting at the admins office to speak to someone about her credits being transferred.
"So you worked and studied last year?"
"Uh huh."
She was distracted by her phone. I nudged her leg with mine until she looked up. She was smiling, trying to contain her laugh.
"What's so funny?"
“
Nothing." She started giggling.
"What?!"
I tried to take the phone out of her hands, but she pulled it away too quickly.
"Seriously, what's so funny?"
"Nothing!"
I reached around her to try to grab it. I knew whatever the hell she was laughing at was about me.
She laughed harder.
"What are you saying about me?"
She kept moving the phone behind her; I kept moving to try to reach it. I realized that I was practically on top of her now, with both my arms around her and our faces a few inches apart. I could feel her breasts against my chest, rising and falling with each breath.
I watched as she brought her tongue out and slowly skimmed it along her top lip. I don't know if she did it to fuck with me, because I'm pretty sure I was sporting a semi just by watching her do it. My own breathing became faster, more strained. I bit my lip to stop myself from kissing her.
Fuck it.
I moved in slowly, to warn her that I was about to kiss her, because I couldn
’
t fucking help myself. Her eyes fell shut, and for a second, I thought she was about to let me. But then she laughed.
Fucking
laughed.
I pulled back and let out a frustrated groan, shaking my head at her.
She kept giggling.
I straightened up and tried to hide my 'I'm-nineteen-and-should-not-have-a-boner' boner.
***
Amanda: You would not believe who my new housemate is.
Alexis: Who? That kid Luca with the lazy bung eye...but not lazy enough to stare at your tits?
Amanda: No! Ew! Creepy! Logan!
Alexis: Four random words do not a sentence make.
Amanda: Logan!!! Is my new housemate.
Alexis: Get. The. Fuck. Out.
Amanda: Not even joking. He's sitting right next to me.
Alexis: Mm...what's he wearing?
Amanda: You're crazy.
Alexis: Seriously though. What does he smell like? Sniff him.
Amanda: Stop it. You're going to make me laugh out loud.
Alexis: Fine. Don't tell me. I've seen him near naked remember? I regret not doing the nasty with him.
Amanda: Thanks for the reminder.
Alexis: No problem. Hey...honest question. Next time he's in the shower, just sneak me a pic, okay? Just his abs. I don't even need a lower half.
Amanda: OMG. You're too much.
Amanda
After I finished at the admins office we stopped by a cafe for lunch.
We'd just finished eating when the waitress came to clear our plates and asked if we wanted anything for dessert.
"Banana split, two spoons," he told her, never taking his eyes off me.
My eyes went wide, surprised that he remembered, and he must've sensed it because he smiled at me. "What? Did you think I'd forget?"
I just shook my head. I had no words.
He leaned forward, so close our knees touched. His hands under the table reached for my legs as he slowly ran his fingers up the side of my thighs. "I remember everything about that night, Amanda. Everything."
And if I lived my life like Logan Matthews, this is the moment I wished I could forget the past. Forget what he did. Forget that he hurt me. Because I wanted so badly
—
more than anything else
—
to be able to
forgiv
e him. And maybe, just maybe, we could be everything I once hoped for.
The dessert arrived and he scooted next to me, sharing the banana split like we did on our date. Only this time, I was surrounded by the memories of him, and of that night.
His arm rested on the back of the seat behind me. He moved his body closer. "Hey." His voice was low and husky when he continued. "Remember when you did that thing with the Gummy Bear in my mouth?"
My eyes fell shut. Of course I remembered. I could feel him move his mouth closer to my ear. His breath was against my neck.
"
I
remember it," he whispered, his breathing heavy. "I remember feeling your mouth on mine, feeling the heat of your breath mixed with the cold of the ice-cream. I remember thinking it was the
sexiest
fucking thing that's ever happened to me. Ever." My hand instinctively landed on his leg. I slowly turned my head towards him, never once opening my eyes. I felt his lips brush against mine, from side to side, so fucking lightly. His fingers snaked through my hair, his palm on the back of my head, holding it in place. I caught my breath. He kissed my lips softly, just once. "I remember that about two minutes after that, you were on me, with my hands on your ass while you were grinding on my dick."
I froze.
I couldn't move. I couldn't think.
All I could do is remember. Remember the way his mouth moved with mine, the way he touched me, the way he made me feel like he
worshipped
me.
"I remember thinking how badly I wanted to be inside you," his breath came faster, heavier. And somewhere in the back of my mind I remembered that we were in a public place. But I just didn't fucking care right now. He kept going, "I remember wanting to
fuck you
, Amanda."
I bit my lip to stop the moan from escaping.
"Breathe," he said.
And I let out all the air I didn't know I was holding. "Do you remember?" he asked, still speaking low, that huskiness in his voice driving me crazy.
I nodded my head slowly.
His lips moved against mine, so fucking softly, I could've imagined it.
Then with his hand on the back of my head, he pulled me closer to him. Our lips touched, but didn't move. Against my mouth, he said, "I promised I wouldn't kiss you. So if you want this, you have to be the one to do it."
I did.
I did want it.
I turned so my entire body was facing him as I leaned into him. I started to move my mouth against his. I heard him moan, waiting for me to keep going. I opened my mouth and ran my tongue along his bottom lip
—